Safe from all Harm?

Sarale yawns and sits up on Ithildin once they reach camp.

SARALE:

"I'm so sleepy." 

She slides off of Ithildin's back and stumbles, whimpering at the pain in her sore joints and muscles. She hands Tunda back his shirt and stands there awkwardly for a moment as if contemplating something before her shoulders droop and she turns to head to her tent. Karma stops her and forces her to sit back on Ithildin.

KARMA:

"You can't wait until we take you to the tent?? You're hurt, what do you think you're doing??"

Their tone seems aggravated and harsh. It was odd to see Karma so upset.

SARALE:(confused)

"I-I was just.. gonna go to bed. I'm okay… just sore."

KARMA:(Annoyed)

"Sit on the damn wolf. We're taking you there and helping you lay down, stop making this harder on yourself."

Sarale flinches at Karma's tone and looks down at her hands.

SARALE:(teary)

"I'm sorry.. I just, I don't want to be a burden."

KARMA:(shout)

"If you don't wanna be a burden then don't fucking argue with me anymore, you fighting our help hurts more than watching you struggle by yourself! Understand! You tell us the exact same thing, so follow your own advice and let us be your shield for once!"

Karma's sudden shouting at Sarale made Aktlass look up from the campfire to see them. Tears spill from Sarale's eyes as she squeaks from Karma's outburst, shrinking back and staring at the ground with wide eyes.

SARALE:

"I-I-I'm sorry."

KARMA:(teary)

"Then fucking sit on the damn dog and let us help. I don't want to hear anymore of that being a burden crap, got it. You take what we give you and stop being so damn stubborn."

Karma holds back their tears as they go to their tent and shut the entrance. Sarale sits on the back of Ithildin and sinks into his fur, sniffling and fighting back the tears.

SARALE:(*quivering*)

"I'm sorry."

Tunda helps Sarale stay steady on Ithildin and he walks her to her tent to help her go to Vajor, who now stood at the tent he shared with Sarale with deep concern.

TUNDA:(softly)

"... Please help her lay down. She's had a ruff night."

Tunda takes his shirt and the scroll Sarale was meant to give him and leaves. Vajor nods and lifts Sarale off the back of Ithildin, carrying her into the tent and helping her settle onto his chest. She sniffles and hiccups silently, as the tears start to fall freely from her eyes. Vajor rubs her back and sighs, holding her close till she falls asleep. He stares up at the tent and listens tentatively to any conversation outside that may explain the situation further.

Aktlass makes Tunda sit by the fire to get an explanation. First asking why he returned with them is the state they were in and Tunda answers by telling him how he met up with them and how he found Sarale. He then tells Aktlass about Sarale currently being in the state she was in, including her near death experience with the Kelpie that got dragged into the camp.

AKTLASS:

"... Then why did Karma go off on her like that? They never do that unless something triggers them to..."

TUNDA:

"Sarale's back is riddled with scars... similar to ours, carved insults and slurs as if she were a parchment to cut... Whip lashes and old wounds that haven't healed properly..."

Tunda's eyes fill with tears as he hangs his head in pain and remorse. 

TUNDA:

"I don't think Karma took them well. Since they've seen our scars too. Maybe seeing Sarale's made them scared for her, so they wanted to help her the best they could... But Sarale... Was going to do as she always did, and bare it by herself. That might have been what set them off. She's not a burden... I don't know why she thinks Karma would ever feel that way. They'd never say that to her without reason, right?"

AKTLASS:

"... You're right. And that is a logical reason to be harsh on her for it... But I don't think that was the best way to do it."

TUNDA:

"I don't either. But what can be done?"

AKTLASS:

"... Keep an eye on both of them for now. Stay close and listen to karma's words. Make sure they don't say anything unreasonable."

TUNDA:

"I understand."

Tunda starts working on his offering while Aktlass puts the Kelpie body into a bag of holding to dismantle later.

The silence of the night hovers around the camp, with a soft darkness watching over everyone. In a dream, Sarale opens her eyes to find the dark mist pulling back and she sniffles finding herself in her forest. She wanders for a moment and finds a bioluminescent mushroom, tall enough for her to hide under. She curls up under it and hugs herself. A little green monkey hangs from the edge and crawls under with her, nuzzling her cheek, and squeezing its way into her arms for cuddles. John appears towering over the mushroom she hid under and kneels down to see her. 

JOHN:

"You started being a burden the moment you thought it was a good idea to ignore your friends' concerns for your health."

His expression was cold but his words didn't sound harsh or reprimanding, but rather confused.

JOHN:

"Your action just now made them feel like they were being useless to you because you refuse to ask for their help. You don't want to be a burden, stop making them feel like you don't trust them with your well being. Why do you still ignore them when they offer you a helping hand out of love?"

Sarale slinks further in and hugs the monkey close to her chest. It chirps and trills at her cuddling close and she shivers.

SARALE:

"I wasn't trying to. I just.. it's not easy to get over a hundred years of conditioning. I can't help, but think if I'm not useful they'll leave me. If I can't take care of myself they'll think I'm a burden and abandon me like everyone else. I know they're not the same, but that thought still nags at me."

John offers his hand to her and pets her head. 

JOHN:

"The correct term is haunting, first of all… and second of all, even with that mindset, you should try to push yourself to accept what they want to do for you, even if you feel guilty for taking advantage of it. You'll feel more of their love for you that way afterward. It's harder on them to watch you force yourself to suffer so much and that's what they find burdensome. Especially after seeing the scars on your back. you saw how they looked at you right? that pain in the eyes? That sorrow from seeing the torment displayed on your body? They saw that and it broke them. You know that those hurt expressions aren't your fault right? Who do you think they blame for seeing that part of you?"

Sarale's eyes widen in realization.

SARALE:(panic)

"I.. I don't even think about them anymore. It's been so long. I thought I had done something wrong again. It's just.."

She takes his hand and the monkey climbs onto her shoulder as she crawls out from under the mushroom.

SARALE:

"When I was younger, I was beaten for asking for help, especially if I couldn't take care of myself. I was left to my own devices and if I couldn't succeed and asked for help I was beaten harder. They told me I was worthless and weak because I couldn't care for myself. I would never amount to anything and they said nobody would ever love me. Even if they said they did, they didn't mean it and would just leave me unless I could prove myself. No matter how hard I tried it was never enough and when I tried to run away.. they made sure I couldn't."

She looks up at John and sniffles holding onto his sleeve, her eyes full of confusion.

SARALE:

"asking for help makes me a burden.. doesn't it?"

John's eyes still seem cold as he looks down at her. His tone changed to one that was stern but not hurtful.

JOHN:

"Of course not, you idiot. This ain't the underdark, you have every right and reason to ask for help when you need it. Don't keep that shit to yourself like a tortured puppy, they won't understand if you don't explain that yourself. So make sure you tell that to your devil friend when you wake up. They need to hear that the most."

He grabs her arm and helps her stand with him.

JOHN:

"Now come on. Quick your moping and get pruning. You got a lot of work to do to get to that point. Got it? If you want help. Just ask for it... I give you a good push when you need it."

He walks her to the entrance to the small forest she was in, leading her to a large over growth of dark plants with bright green roots. Upon closer inspection, she could see that all the plants were dyed in a black gunk as if they were bleeding from their stems and petals.

JOHN:(pained)

"This is your garden, huh? You got some real work ahead of you, Dovely. Go on, get working, try to start there."

John points to a corner that was darker than the rest, as if a wall had over cast a shadow on them. It was cold and dry, completely untouched and dying.

JOHN:

"That needs the most attention and care, so start there. I'll go do my part elsewhere. Call if you need some encouragement."

He walks to a brighter area and falls through the garden of darkness without a trace.

Sarale watches him leave and sniffles venturing into the garden and drawing her blade to cut at the blackened plants. When a huge plant bursts from the ground and whips at her. She braces herself for a long, hard battle and in the end is victorious. Sarale sits on her knees, the body taker plant's corpse before her, panting and holding into her ribs in pain.

SARALE:

"fucking plant."

She looks around, blood sticking her hair to her face and bruises littering her flesh, she sighs.

SARALE:

"John? Did I do okay?"

John approaches her from behind and pats her head with one hand then holds his other hand out to let a bundle of small pearl-shaped ruby colored berries with transparent skin bubble and grow from his palm and he offers the bundle to her. his face now more relaxed and calm, but still blanketed in emptiness. Sarale smiles up at him taking the berries. She hesitates feeling his discomfort and sees herself through his eyes. A beaten and broken little girl, his sadness making her shoulders droop. Sarale sighs and munches in a berry before speaking.

SARALE:

"I.. I should have asked for help.. should I have?"

JOHN:

"...did you think you could do this much with help?" 

John's question seemed sarcastic. He lets go of her head and her wounds start to vanish.

JOHN:(sighs)

"Can you think of why I told you to start here? in the darkest part of your garden?"

Sarale shrugs sadly looking down.

SARALE:

"I wasn't sure, to be honest. I just know you told me to do something and I did everything I could to make that happen. But.. feeling your unhappiness with the outcome and seeing myself through your eyes.. you don't even like me.. hmm.. you wanted me to ask for help.. because you knew it would be the hardest fight. (*looks at john*) right? If you feel this way seeing me hurt. How do they feel? They love me.. it must be so much worse for them."

She sighs and rests her head on her knees and eats the rest of the berries thinking though everything he'd just shown her.

SARALE:

"I think I'm starting to understand now."

JOHN:

"Good..."

John hands her the rest of the berries and walks back to the brighter parts of the garden.

JOHN:

"Now try again."

He stops and turns to face her.

JOHN:

"Think of what your devil friend would do if they saw you struggle this time."

He hops back into the garden and falls again. Sarale sits there munching on the berries and thinks about his words.

SARALE:

"They would help me."

She stands and walks to another part of the garden with a similar aura.

SARALE:

"Does my struggling and hurting feel the same to them as when I saw Tunda at the checkpoint? Is it the same sorrow?"

Sarale closes her eyes and thinks back to the camp after capturing Lendral. Aktlass' words echo throughout her mind and she repeats them to herself.

SARALE:

"I'm not a monster. I deserve to be loved. I'm safe."

When she opens her eyes they glow a faint green and she lets out a calming breath.

SARALE:

"Okay. I'm ready. Help me."

A sprout suddenly grows in front of her and becomes a giant humanoid with many scars on its face and long hair that falls over its head. The humanoid stands straight and looks at her with bright pale silver eyes then smiles gently with brotherly affection. He pulls two axes from behind him and turns around to face the garden with her ready to attack.

outside, Aktlass keeps his eyes on the fire lost in thought when he suddenly feels a space open in his heart as if he was just called for help by someone. he instinctively looks at Vajor and Sarale's tent, curious and confused. he lets the feeling take his heart welcomes it happily feeling the peace of being accepted by someone as he looks back at the fire, oddly calm and energized.

In the forest nearby, Tunda sits on a rock near the lake where he saved Sarale, making a small bowl of a variety of hand crafted snacks and sweet treats from his gatherings he collected from the forest. He sets it by a large tree that sat farthest from the bank of the river while still in the open area, then goes back to the rock to sit when he hears a munch from the tree. John sprouts from the base of the tree eating from the bowl he was offered. 

JOHN:

"ooh! This is a real good reward for my efforts! I think I can keep this up more if this is what I'm gonna get every day. Mmn. by the way... num... snowball gat a whole mess in her head. I'm amazed she's still able to think for herself at this point, but hey... Mm. That's good right?"

TUNDA:

"... is she alright now?"

JOHN:

"Num nom... if you're asking if she can be saved for that demon inside her...gulp then yeah. It'll take a lot of effort from her end, but she can be saved from the demon's influence at least. Kinda wish she wasn't so stupidly stubborn about doing shit by herself though. That just made my promise with you ten times more annoying than I thought it'd be... nom. hmm~... but don't worry about it. It's not a hard thing to do since she's just fighting back trauma. It's the conditioning that's gonna make it troublesome though."

TUNDA:

"Conditioning?... So she was abused her entire childhood..."

JOHN:

"for over a hundred years no less. now that's gotta be a bitch. it's like you dealing with you're slave mark for like three generations at least, right?"

TUNDA:

"... so. How is her progress so far?"

JOHN:

"took a minute to get her to understand what you guys go through just from watching her. She ain't got no damn concept of comradery at all, I tell ya. Though being treated like you in the underdark for so long has got to be the worst nightmare I've ever seen, man. Even after she leaves this forest, you're all gonna need to help her stay on her feet and keep her in the new mindset of pushing blame to the demon inside her, so she can stop blaming herself for the tragedy she lived in."

TUNDA:

"I understand. Thank you for all your help. I truly do appreciate it. I'll make even better confections for you during our time here."

John finishes his bowl and steps out of the tree and walks over to him to hand the bowl back.

JOHN:

"... I really don't get why you don't ask me to remove you from your slave status instead so you can stop suffering the same fate. You're nothing but a pet playing fetch at this point. Not even as a real part of this family of misfits. Even with her trauma's and history from the underdark, your life is no different even in this moment. You could have just left. I'd have been more than happy to help you escape. I'd even let you make your home here in the forest, away from everyone. from the scaled reptile that wants to rip you to pieces, from the slave drivers that made you this way, I could treat you better than even the little devil that saved your life-."

TUNDA:

"no thanks. It's fine. I don't need that... I don't want it either." 

Tunda stands and stretches out a bit. John holds out his hand to him as little red, crystal clear pearls with red liquid inside them grow from his palm. Tunda stares at them in awe for a moment then looks at John with skepticism and concern. He holds up his hand in refusal.

TUNDA:

"No thanks. I'm fine, without goodberries."

JOHN:

"awe... well, alright. You're always welcome to ask for them for Snowball too."

TUNDA:

"no... I'm sure you already fed those to her with how she's been acting since this morning."

JOHN:

"Oh yeah. That'll wear out soon. it's just a side effect from my goodberries. she'll get used to it soon. they do a good job of keeping her happy don't they?"

TUNDA:

"yeh, well, they do something. How long does that even last for?"

JOHN:

"with how she's going now,... about another day or so."

John smiles at Tunda with childish eyes that darken as the sun rises through the forest.

TUNDA:

"... alright then. I'll make something new next time."

JOHN:

"uh huh! I look forward to it!"

John drops into the ground with a wave of his hand and leaves Tunda in silence again. He sits back down and hangs his head, looking into the empty bowl in his hands. as the sun finally peaks through the trees. He decides to go back to the camp and enters the forest. On his way he hears unnatural rustling in the trees and looks around to find the drow he faced by the cave rushing through the forest killing a few cultists on his way to the camp. Tunda hurries around the back of the group racing to the camp and jumps two of the cults and the entire group stops in their tracks. One screams in agony while the other groans and falls unconscious. Tunda glares at the group with a face of disgust and everyone becomes frozen with fear as he pulls his ax from his belt and stands ready to remove all of them.