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"Why would I do such things? Haven't I accepted this destiny of mine? Am I not supposed to become stronger and helpful? What the hell am I doing here... What am I trying to do, to achieve? I'm no longer human. I can't even call myself a friend, even less a son. I don't know anything anymore, I can't feel anything anymore. God I hate myself."

Lanternnn · Urban
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20 Chs

Edmund's secretive technique

Swiftly, long white lashes delicately followed through the movements of my blinking eyes, I felt disbelieved and distressed. Was this my actual eye? It felt so unfamiliar I thought my mind was tricking me. Yet, this was as real as the pain of my two scars. 

"Is this because you're an 'infected'?" Questioned Lilianne, who I hadn't noticed approaching me. She was truly quiet and discreet as a sly cat. 

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I still answered, distressed, my tone sounding more rude than I wished;

"Aren't you the one supposed to know that stuff? What the hell is going on with my body?"

"It looks sick! It looks so cool, like you're out of a comic or something!" 

Ignoring my worries, she bathed in a blinding brightness, for a moment it felt as if it didn't matter, this wasn't important and I shouldn't bother with this anymore. Just live life happily, y'know. However, the burning pain slowly increasing on my face told otherwise. It wasn't actually fully healed yet, I guess.

 I was feeling pathetic, if I can be honest. My best friend and Lilianne, Jay's sister, came here by themselves just for us. They traveled through the dangerous city and escaped the lurking Brillantes. They even had to trust that tall man, without knowing anything about him… And what did I do as a reaction? Nothing. I didn't even say hello to the little girl… What a trashy man I am. Once again, I couldn't control my thoughts. Once again, I got rude and pessimistic. Even as an 'infected', I'm worth less than a penny. I'm…

.

.

.

Wait… Huh? What's going on? 

I can't see… It's so dark around me, did I go blind from the infection?

What happened again? I remember seeing myself in the glass… and then, it's all a blank. What the hell? 

Just as I thought I was going crazy, a golden light shined through my eyes, my blurry vision showing what seemed to be a… Ceiling? Where am I?

+

Suddenly, something seemed wrong with Yuri. To be more exact, he seemed dizzy and his steps were getting messier and messier as he held his head within his trembling hand. As a sort of reflex, Jay swiftly approached his friend and held on to him. He was right for doing so;

As soon as he brushed his now frail shoulder, all strength seemed to run out of Yuri's body. Like a corpse, he fell into Jay's arms and for a slight instant, no one spoke. 

It's after a few seconds, filled with surprise and confusion, that Sasha and Lilianne stepped back in startle. Behind them, the tall man quietly gazed at the fallen man. With an interrogatory expression, Eli stepped in. 

"What the hell happened?"

Startled, Jay shook his head in confusion. His stance, usually confident and serious, was now hesitant and shaky. 

What just happened? What happened to him? Is it exhaustion, or perhaps…

'Or perhaps, his infection took over his body.' 

Everyone in the place was having the same thoughts. Well… everyone except for that man, this same man who had the mission to protect him, the same man who observed them from far away. Edmund knew what was going on. Or rather, he was the cause of this unusual event. 'What a damn unstable prick' could be a good way to summarize his secretive thoughts.

From the small bit of information he had gotten, it had caught his attention that the man which he had to follow was very hesitant and insecure. Moreover, he was an overthinker. Edmund had never understood those people, no matter how hard he tried to. Overthinking… Getting sick from a mere thought, this was all strangers for him. Maybe this was from his naturally calm state of mind, or maybe this was because of his unusual ability, he had never gotten issues such as overthinking his entire identity or life. 

Though even if he had never understood, he knew it was a possible case. Some people, no matter how old they are, no matter how hard they try, they can't stop thinking. This sad condition, although useful at times, was pretty harmful for one's body and mind. This was, indeed, Yuri's case. Never ending worries, useless thoughts flooding his mind, Edmund couldn't fathom living this kind of life. 

This is why, maybe as a kind deed or perhaps to avoid further issues, he permitted himself to play with Yuri's mind and relieve this detestable habit. Edmund knew the consequences of his action. But a three day in-bed condition was the best exchange to a life without useless overflowing and malicious ghosts floating around in your head. 

This was the explanation for how Yuri lost consciousness, even if no one would ever learn the truth. Or, at least not in a long while. 

In a sort of harmonized panic, the group rushed through a place which could welcome Yuri's weak body. Sasha, who had watery eyes from the amount of stress she had to bear, couldn't stop looking at him. It was as if, he too would suddenly get out of her sight, she would be all alone again. Such a life was certainly not what she desired, and despair took over her weakened heart once again. 

Behind everyone, Jay and Lilianne stood together, hands tangled together. Even though they had reunited after almost 2 months, a feeling of emptiness would've choked them once again. 

Eli, next to Yuri's side, stared at him with genuine worry. He was no doctor, even if he wished to help him, he couldn't do more than hope for his well-being. It had been a while since he had felt a genuine connection with someone, he had felt like himself after ages. He couldn't lose this feeling just now. 

The only one, the one who was outstanding from this overwhelming worry, was of course Edmund. With his silence yet calm and professional trance, he swept Yuri's cold sweat on his face, cleaned his scars with a gracious delicacy, and verified his pulse. Though he knew what was going on, he still had to make sure his patient was feeling well. 

"There's no need to worry." His voice, echoing in the empty room of a mattress store they had just found by luck, woke everyone up from their dismay. Some lifted their heads up, eyes lightened up from the sudden announcement, yet Edmund did not let them talk. With all the strength he had just to speak to this many people, he explained; "His situation is far from critical. Since I'm not an actual doctor, I can't be for sure. But from my knowledge, he got knocked out from exhaustion. No need to worry."

"And how would you know? You're not a doctor, you told us yourself." Eli's rude tone flooded the spacious place. The dim light was enough to show his face. His hazel eyes, which were usually joyful and bright, didn't shine a bit at this moment. Jay looked at him, surprised. Of course he had thought that too, it's just that he didn't think Eli could be smart… Well, that Eli also had logical thoughts?

Going with the flow, Jay stood up, glaring at Edmund. Could they trust this man? Was he a good person? Why was he with Lilianne and Sasha… Something felt off, they had to know the truth, and quickly. 

Really enjoyed writing from the omniscient's pov, tho I didn't really review it... I'll do this soon but if you see mistakes already just tell me!!

Have a great day <33

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