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Rabbit Must Die

Ever since a despicable rabbit arrived at the Heavenly Court, banners have been hung up in the residences of all the major Immortals: beware of fire, theft, and rabbits. At the same time, the God of Food's Complete Rabbit Cooking Guide started selling like hotcakes. One could often see a bunch of Immortals waving various magic treasures, chasing a rabbit all over everywhere, shouting, "Although group beating is unfair, we can lose face, the rabbit must die!" Passerby A: Why is that rabbit so freaking famous? Almost all the Immortals know him, is it because he's cute? Passerby B: No! It's because he's a jerk! No, that's inaccurate, he's totally a mega jerk!

Yimeng Huangliang · Eastern
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837 Chs

Chapter 6 Fishing for Stars_1

Qin Shou had been holding back a breath of frustration in his heart. In his previous life, he was a burden, but in this life, he was determined to make a turnaround and hold up this family. So, just as he said he would, Qin Shou spent the entire night gnawing on tree bark, until dawn.

However, Qin Shou soon discovered that as quickly as he gnawed, the trees recovered just as fast. What had been chewed into something resembling a big pair of underpants the day before had transformed back into long-legged trousers overnight.

Qin Shou couldn't help but laugh, "Hey...this is great, no feelings of guilt at all."

After gnawing on the tree bark all night, Qin Shou felt his jaw sore and his energy waning, so he decided to return and get a good sleep.

But upon arriving at the mouth of the cave, he saw a stunningly beautiful woman sitting on the stone at the entrance, supporting her chin with one hand, fighting off sleepiness, occasionally lifting her head to look around, and asking, "Yu'er, have you come back?"

Clearly, Chang'e had failed to catch up with him and had waited at the mouth of the cave all night.

Seeing this, Qin Shou's heart softened, and he walked over and nudged Chang'e's foot.

Chang'e instantly woke up, looking down to see it was Qin Shou, and, as if she had just found several million in cash, she laughed loudly while hugging Qin Shou, "Haha... you're finally back! Good, good, as long as you're okay!"

After speaking, Chang'e tugged at Qin Shou's short tail and hummed, "You're not allowed to run off on your own anymore! If you want to run, I have to come with you! What if you get another nosebleed?"

Qin Shou, looking at the feigned anger on Chang'e's face, could only grin foolishly and nod along, thinking to himself: It's so nice to have someone who cares about me!

"Look at you, all dirty, let's go, time for a bath!" Chang'e said, and off she went, carrying Qin Shou.

Qin Shou had been so sleepy he could hardly stand, but the mention of a bath instantly revitalized him! His drooping ears perked right up, and as he gazed at Chang'e's perfect face, his heart felt as if it were filled with a hundred thousand hungry wolves howling—aooou!

"A bath, eh, sharing it with a beauty, haha..." Qin Shou laughed smugly to himself! In that moment, he meticulously recalled the secrets of swimming, especially the techniques for diving headlong.

But the next moment...

Splash!

Qin Shou sat in a small puddle, his ears drooping, wearing an expression of utter despondency, as the water soaked his fur, turning him into a weird-looking thing.

Indeed, Qin Shou had been placed by Chang'e in a small puddle, not in a grand bathhouse or a swimming pool... In that instant, he felt as if his entire bunny life had lost all its dreams, without a wish in the world!

At that moment, Qin Shou finally remembered that rabbits took their baths right here! As for Chang'e? His memory contained no recollections of her bathing; it seemed that Chang'e had the kind of dust- and dirt-repelling physique typical of an Immortal, never needing a bath and never accumulating any filth.

Just then, something felt off, and he exclaimed with a start, "Hey hey hey... where are you touching? Watch it! Turn! No, no... aooou..."

After he finished his bath, Qin Shou was placed on a stone to dry in the sun, while he watched Chang'e, with a tender face, help him straighten out his fur with her fingers. At last, he confirmed his suspicion! Chang'e was completely clueless about rabbits! She couldn't even tell males from females!

If that weren't the case, Chang'e would not have given a male rabbit such a feminine name as Yu'er.

Thinking this, Qin Shou heaved a sigh, spread out his limbs and lay flat on the stone, trying to expose as much of his body to the sun as possible, all the while pondering: For such a pure girl, I must have struck it big...

After basking in the sun for over ten minutes, Chang'e was already dozing off by his side, teetering on the edge of sleep, which made Qin Shou's heart ache.

Qin Shou took a pen in his mouth and wrote on the ground: "I'm done, tired, want to sleep."

Chang'e, groggily opening her eyes and yawning, touched Qin Shou's fur, shook her head, and pressed him back onto the stone to continue drying.

Twenty minutes later, Qin Shou was certain his fur was dry and nudged Chang'e again.

She opened her eyes, touched Qin Shou's fur, then stood up groggily, hugging Qin Shou as she walked towards the cave, murmuring, "Sleepy, sleepy..."

Qin Shou felt Chang'e's unsteady steps, a mix of worry and affection swelled in his heart, but above all, he was filled with a warm feeling and an overwhelming sense of responsibility!

Such a nice sister, he must make her happy!

But then came a spark of excitement; no mandarin duck bath, but sharing a bed was great too! Qin Shou had even planned in advance his sleeping position, and whether to sleep on her chest or rest his head on her thigh...

To his surprise, Chang'e lifted Qin Shou high up before the stone bed, stood on tiptoe, and placed Qin Shou into a small hole in the cave! She then laid down on the stone bed herself and fell fast asleep with loud snores!

Qin Shou lay in that hollowed-out pit in the stone, once again losing the dream of his rabbit life.

Not giving up, he peered down to catch a glimpse of something and saw Chang'e mumble in her sleep, "Forgot to change clothes."

At that, Qin Shou's heart pounded rapidly, his eyes widening!

But then Chang'e waved her sleeve, and her clothes disappeared in an instant, replaced by a full set of pajamas! As for the process of changing clothes—none!

Upon seeing this, Qin Shou looked up at the ceiling and muttered, "I f*cking hate Immortal Technique!"

Then, he shut his eyes, sleep washed over him, and he began snoring away.

In his dream, Qin Shou seemed to see a rabbit wearing a straw hat, carrying a fishing rod, fishing.

He leaned in for a closer look, only to find that underneath the rabbit's fishing rod wasn't a lake, but a starry sky! The rod wasn't pulling up fish, but stars! With a flick of the rod, the stars flew up, shrinking continuously before soaring into the sky. The rabbit opened its mouth, and snap, consumed the stars, crunching them like sugar beans!

Seeing this, Qin Shou was drenched in cold sweat... Holy moly, that was intense!

Just then, the straw-hat-wearing rabbit turned its head, grinned at him, and said, "If you don't want to die, eat with all your might."

Qin Shou was startled, and just as his heart tightened and he was about to say something, the scene shattered, and he raised his head only to bump it against the rock ceiling. However, he felt no pain, as if his rabbit body knew no such thing... perhaps, it simply had no nerves.

Rubbing his eyes, he confirmed he was still in the cave, Chang'e was still sleeping below, and a breeze brought in a hint of osmanthus fragrance.

Qin Shou confirmed that it was all just a dream, but it felt too real! Even now, he could remember everything in the dream! Qin Shou had a feeling that it might not be an ordinary dream—perhaps, it was a life-or-death notice sent by his body!

"If you don't want to die, eat with all your might!" The phrase echoed over and over in his mind.

Qin Shou touched his arm, still feeling a bit tired, but... he didn't want to die!

So once again, Qin Shou dashed out, embarking on another round of bark-harvesting.

Not wanting to wake Chang'e, Qin Shou decided to venture further away; he didn't believe that the vast moon had only osmanthus trees! He had to find other things; what if he did find something?

As he wandered farther and farther, suddenly, Qin Shou heard a series of panting and thudding sounds...

PS: Don't worry, it's not a field battle, don't think crooked.