First Day
Shay stands opposed to the Cowboy, quickly looking over his opponent to try and identify potential threats and weaknesses, noticing a revolver on his hip, Shay was excited, not only did he get the present of a damn dirty hillbilly to beat to death but it wouldn't come easy, this was gonna therapeutic for him.
"So partner, I don't really want to kill a kid, and some of the fellas here aren't the kindest, so how about we calm down and just chat?"
The Cowboy offers, hoping he wouldn't have to pull his pistol on Shay, it would only take one shot but the therapy would take much longer. This did nothing but anger Shay, this guy wouldn't stop calling him a kid, even after he almost shot him, but this did give Shay an idea.
Shay begins ugly crying, The Cowboy approaches and puts his hand on Shay's shoulder to try and comfort him, Shay thrusts himself forward as if going in for a hug but instead grabs The Cowboy's Revolver from their holster, quickly firing it before The Cowboy knows what's going on, the bullet goes straight through their right wrist, They shove Shay back in panic, getting a good look at the sadistic smile draped over Shay's wet face, it was then that The Cowboy became aware, he was not dealing with a Kid, he was dealing with a Killer.
Shay fires three more shots, fanning the hammer from his side, The Cowboy takes his hat off, catching the bullets with it while closing the distance towards Shay, Shay fires one more shot, aiming for the Cowboy's foot, only for the bullet to bounce off of the boot's steel toe, The Cowboy roundhouse kicks Shay, only for his kick to be blocked by Shay's own leg, risen to his chest to protect himself, leaving him wide open for Shay to kick him in the stomach, he staggers back, clutching his stomach in pain, rage building in his eyes, he looks up to Shay who is enjoying every second of this encounter.
"Alright, fuck it, I guess Brain's kills kids now"
The Cowboy says to himself, finally accepting he isn't gonna incapacitate Shay non-lethally, Shay laughs, mocking Brain.
"Oh my god! that's fucking hilarious! they named the retard Brain! What's your last name?! Rot?!"
Brain attempts to kick Shay while he is laughing, sadly for him Shay was trying to get him to attack for an easy counterattack, Shay takes the kick to the side and grabs their leg, bring his other arm down on their knee, breaking Brain's leg, as Brain falls to the ground in pain Shay looks disappointed, Kicking Brain in the head before squatting down.
"I got my hopes up for you, you seemed to be at my level with that opener, but your dumbass couldn't see through my obviously fake tears, you should really work on that whole 'empathy' thing you got, I shouldn't have to tell you it's a killer's ultimate weakness."
Shay riffles through the barely conscious Brain's pockets, finding an ammo bag and stealing the revolver's holster.
"I will applaud your choice of weaponry, I much prefer revolvers to other firearms, lightweight, stylish, fun to do trick shots with, I haven't practiced my quickdraw skills in awhile, I wonder if I've gotten rusty?"
Shay reloads the pistol, as he stands to leave a group of 4 soldiers turn the corner, immediately raising their firearms at Shay as they see Brain bleed on the floor, Shay pulls the revolver from its holster, fanning the hammer and nailing all 4 soldiers in the forehead and placing the revolver back in the holster in under a second, looking back to Brain afterwards
"Still got it, now I would normally torture you, buuuuut, I think it's more effective to just let you bleed out, enjoy the slow, cold embrace of death."
Shay heads down the hallway, grabbing one of the soldier's bulletproof vest.
Meanwhile, Carl throws his 8 knives at the lumbering beast in front of him, all of them bouncing off of their thick armor, Ribcage lets out 3 grunts, mimicking the pattern of a laugh but sounding like a Pig's snorts, Carl takes a bowie knife from a holster on his leg and tries to rush Ribcage, Ribcage calmly moves to stop Carl's attack and restrain him, only for Carl to toss his bowie knife into the air, falling into a slide between Ribcage's legs, as his feet hit the wall Carl places his hands flat on the ground above his head, kicking off the wall and jumping with his arms simultaneously to take him from the ground all the way up to this behemoth's head, he wraps his legs around Ribcage's throat, catching his falling bowie knife and immediately plunging it right above Ribcage's clavicle.
Ribcage does not let out a single sound, falling onto his back and pinning Carl to the ground with his weight, Carl barely contains his cries of pain, but is relieved he has conquered this mountain, until he goes to get out from under Ribcage and Ribcage shoves his helmet's horn into Carl's stomach, putting most of his weight into the battering ram affixed to his head, Carl screams out in pain, his organs being squashed under thousands of pounds of force, Carl had no idea what to do, this enemy was unbeatable, a wall he didn't have the tools to break, and now he was being crushed to death by a neck bridge.
But Carl couldn't give up, he had to try something, all he needed was one chance to run, there had to be a way for him to get that chance, he kicked at Ribcage's legs but they didn't budge, his consciousness begins to fade as he blindly attacks Ribcage, punching, stabbing, kicking, nothing works, as a last-ditch effort he attempts to lift Ribcage's horn with all his might but can barely ease pressure, no longer capable of keeping his thoughts internal Carl cries out.
"Oh god no! I can't die yet! I just made it in! I can't even keep a damn job! how did I ever think I could save Shay?! I'm supposed to be the one that's good at killing and I fail the one time I actually need to do it!"
Carl begins crying, overwhelmed with guilt and shame, everything fades to black, Carl feels the pressure of Ribcage's horn fade as he drifts off, having one final thought before succumbing.
"So this is death."
Forearm walks through a hall, passing soldiers that salute as they pass and windows that show shooting ranges, they ignore the soldiers heading straight for what appears to be a janitor's closet with janitor scratched off the nameplate, "store" written right below the nameplate. Forearm opens the door and immediately slams it shut as a sniper round is shot at them.
"Jesus Shin! it's just me! do we need to this every time?"
Forearm exclaims in annoyance, opening the door again, the closet is filled with weird odds and ends, shell casings, a couple of tires, a car engine, some practice targets, a box filled with pistols, a gumball machine filled with grenades, a half-empty motor oil container, there is a desk cutting the room in half. sitting behind the desk with his feet up on the desk and a sniper in his hands is a short man with a pencil mustache, squinted eyes, and thin cheeks, they wear blue military fatigues under an apron that has Shin written dozens of times all over, ranging from great handwriting to serial killer scribbles, their hair is black and slicked back. seeing Forearm they lower their sniper and put a big service smile over their face.
"I sorry Miss Forearm, have to protect store from shoprifters."
Shin apologizes, his English broken but almost seeming deliberate, Forearm enters the closet and closes the door behind them, sitting down on a toilet to the right of the door, Shin asks as they sit.
"what brings Forearm to store today?"
"Just need to a chat, today has been the bad kind of stupid and I need some of the good kind of stupid."
"ah, so you need therapist Shin"
Shin stands up and takes a brown jacket out from under the desk, putting it on over his current outfit and grabbing a clipboard from a metal shelf beside him while sitting back down, he takes a pair of oversized glasses from the jacket's pocket and puts them on, Forearm chuckles a bit.
"so terl me about your day?"
"Okay, thanks shin, well I was sent on the solo mission you guys got the day off from, it was very weird, they sent me to try and capture this kid but gave me all kinds of explosive rounds, and only like 12 non-lethal rounds, so I perched myself on this old apartment and took my first shot, into a god damn McWonalds, it was basically just domestic terrorism, I thought I killed the little shit with the first shot but sent some tear gas inside just in case, then my motion detector pinged me so I sent another shot into the building, only for the fucker to come barreling out from the front entrance, and from what I heard I'm pretty sure he was shirtless, he probably still is."
"he survive a grenade? that kid crazy."
"I know right?! I killed like 13 people within the first two rounds but this kid just refused to give up, he started dodging my grenades while shooting at me so I just hid on the roof and kept firing at him, so now I know this kid has a fucking GUN! and no one seemed to find it important to tell me I was fighting an armed child."
"Children frightening, Children with gun very frightening."
"and this kid knew how to use it, if I didn't drop down they would have hit me right in the head, and then they dodged all of my grenades, I don't know if they knew I was blind or what because it almost seemed like they exploited that, they rushed back into the McWonalds and threw a corpse out the window which kept me distracted long enough for them to get out of the McWonalds without me hearing, they gave away their position with a gunshot which seemed stupid so I predicted which way they'd run and fired 3 shots, and he somehow flung one of the grenades BACK AT ME! if it weren't for my armor I would have died."
"Weird, you win?"
"I mean, of course I did, but I'm glad I was the one sent because other than Ribcage I'm pretty sure anyone else in the crew would have died to this guy, and now Quark is trying to put him on our Crew."
"That is very suck, Quark try to bring down store a lot."
"The kid is also arrogant as hell, almost everything he said to Quark was either an insult or an innuendo, usually both, and they keep trying to claim they aren't that serial killer Skull but they clearly are, with skills like that they have to have a huge body count. anyway, thanks for listening Shin, what have you been up to?"
"Restocking store, was running low on gumballs, you keep buying me out, and someone steal pistol box, no one steal pistol box."
"well you've got it back now, who took it?"
"I don't know, this new pistol box, they aren't as cool as pistol box but they have to do until I find thief, Brain got angry when I take pistols for box, so he banned from store."
"again? isn't this like the 8th ban?"
"He deserves every one of them!"
"yeah yeah, god Shin, it almost seems like your competing with Hand for weirdest crew member."
"Shin not weird, Shin store owner, what weird about that?"
"Nothing Shin, thanks for the talk."
Forearm stands up, walking over the gumball machine filled with grenades, putting a quarter in and turning the knob, the grenade falls to the floor and Forearm catches it with their foot, kicking it into the air and catching it with the Bandolier around their chest.
"You take care of yourself, and try not to kill anyone, Quark's still gonna be on planet for another day and it'd be really bad if you shot them."
"No promises."
Forearm exits the closet, and immediately hears an alarm blaring and sees soldiers running around, they turn back to Shin with an annoyed look on their face and ask.
"Why did you have to soundproof your store?"
"Store needs peace and quiet!"
Shay runs through the corridors, trying to find a map or something that'd help him escape or find Quark, killing every soldier he comes by with no effort, through this stream of easy bodies Shay acquired a shotgun and an assault rifle, and enough ammo to blindly fire as he pleases. eventually, the alarm starts blaring.
"Took them long enough, I've been firing unsuppressed shots for like 20 minutes already, the management must be as stupid as the soldiers, like the last 40 guys didn't succeed, what makes you guys think you will."
Shay looks behind him making direct eye contact with a soldier peaking around the corner, they are shocked and fall as they scramble away.
"God this gets me going, like taking a piss after holding it for a month, you know what, fuck escaping, I'm burning this place to the ground, empty the tank so to speak... don't pretend you don't hear me you twat, I know you are in that closet."
Shay looks at a door to his left, the door opens and a shirtless man wearing red leather pants and matching boots exits, he is quite chiseled and handsome, his hair dyed pink and spiked, he towers over Shay at about 6'2", around his belt are multi-colored rubber balls about the size of a baseball each in its own holster, Shay snickers and mocks the man.
"what's your name, Elbow? Nose? Cock maybe?"
"They call me Hand, because I'm wonderful at my job."
The Man answers, his voice radiating gay energy, Shay's eyes widen and his grin grows, overjoyed by this interaction, Hand goes to grab one of their balls but Shay reaches his hands out pleading.
"WAIT! can we not fight? your the first person I've met here that I like and I really don't want to kill you, it would be a waste ruining the forehead attached to that face."
"ah... well I'm flattered but I'm already seeing someone."
"Oh I didn't mean it like that, I'm not into... People. but you are awesome and I want to be friends with you, no one has ever answered my innuendos with an innuendo."
"what? I haven't said anything sexual?"
Shay looks puzzled, was this guy entirely unaware of the handjob joke he had just made? Shay needed to know, this was more important than escaping or finding Quark.
"you just said 'they call me Hand, because I'm wonderful at my job', you were obviously eluding to handjobs..."
"what?! no! I mean. well. eh. let me show you."
"Woah Woah Woah, again not into peopl-"
Hand tosses a ball at his feet with significant force, it bounces and uppercuts Shay cutting him off, before falling perfectly back into its holster.
"Now do you get what I'm saying? I'm hand cause I throw stuff."
"isn't throwing mostly the arm? wouldn't Forearm make more sense for you? and Hand would fit better since that grenade launcher of that twat would mostly be the hand and wrist to aim and all that, your naming conventions are weird."
a group of soldiers turn the corner and notice Shay, immediately going to shoot him but being to slow as Shay draws his revolver and takes them all out, Hand yells at him.
"HEY! those men were innocent! and attractive! you can't just kill people like that!"
Hand takes two balls in each hand and prepares to fight Shay, Shay sighs, saddened by what he'd have to do, he puts his revolver back in its holster and drops his rifle and shotgun on the ground, putting his fists up and taking a boxing stance.
"I really hate that we have to do this, so I promise I won't kill you, hopefully we can be friends once this place is nothing more than a distant memory."