They're Psychopaths.
"Oh, you poor thing. It must be so hard over there in that creepy cage, and you've slept there for the last few days." Ji Ru said, Pulling a triangular sleeping cap over Tai Yang's head and eyes. The nightgown-clad duo was almost ready for bed, and Ji Ru happily tugged Tai Yang along out of his Cave closet. "It was okay. The bed was really comfy." Tai Yang said sheepishly, pushing the nightcap above his glasses with his free hand.
Ji Ru rolled his eyes, getting another blanket for Tai Yang's bed. "You and your fascination with beds."
Tai Yang raised both his brows. "You know?"
Ji Ru looked at him like he was crazy. "Do I know? Who do you think picked out this lavish pair of them?" He gestured to the single, four-poster beds that were indeed lavish with their drapery, duck feather pillows, and comforters; not to mention the stones embedded into the wood of the bed.
Tai Yang pointed at himself questioningly. "Of course it was you!" Ji Ru laughed, dusting a pillow.
"When I said let's sleep on straw mats, you said you'd much sooner sleep on a bed of iron nails.
Tai Yang fiddled with some of his hair. "That sounds like something I'd think." He agreed, slightly embarrassed.
"I've been meaning to ask, where did Li Wei sleep before?"
"Oh, don't get confused. He's not always in here, he has his own room. You do too." Ji Ru said, kicking away the extra pillow obstructing his path towards the headboard.
Tai Yang tilted his head. "But I stayed here?"
"Not always. At first, it was once or twice a week, just if you had a bad dream. Then one day you said suddenly decided you wanted to stay here with me permanently." Ji Ru said, propping up their pillows. When he was done, he looked at Tai Yang with a slightly serious expression. "Sometimes you'd get ordered to research topics in private. Obviously, you couldn't tell me about it, but whatever the research entailed, I know it was that that put you in a bad place."
With a frown, Ji Ru sat down on his bed. Also frowning, Tai Yang sat on his own bed.
"Who made me do the research? Did we have a supervisor?"
"We are the supervisors of the castle's Research Department." Ji Ru said. He rubbed his neck and opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something. Pausing, he eventually let out a sigh and flopped backward onto the bed.
"We're allowed to research whatever we want. Nobody's ever really strict with Cognitive cultivators because there are so few of us. They want to keep us researching. In Changying, there are only two other Research centers aside from the one in the castle, all funded by the King. Everyone studies what they want, or they get topics from a supervisor. But you only... Someone was giving you very specific topics to research."
Tai Yang pursed his lips, thinking about what Xiao Xia said. "Was it the King?"
Ji Ru's expression changed into one of deep confusion. "The King? I doubt. He's hardly ever here in the first place. Back then it was the same and even if he was here, he was usually unconscious."
"Unconscious?" Tai Yang asked, pushing his legs beneath the bedding. Ji Ru nodded and shifted to do the same.
"You could say he was very sickly. You were actually his personal Healer. You'd have him up and running within a week, but then he'd leave and come back in an even sorrier state." Ji Ru said, turning onto his side and putting his arm beneath his pillow.
Tai Yang listened intently. Was this what Xiao Xia meant when she said that he couldn't help the King again?
"Can an immortal be sickly?" Tai Yang asked.
"Yes, of course! Everyone can get sick, even the immortals. Depending on what kind of immortal you are, your healing capabilities vary. For example, as a Semi-Immortal, you could live forever if your health is good. But if you were wounded fatally and your body can't heal in time, you die. You heal from illness or wounds at the same rate as a mortal. The only difference is that you don't age. Then there are Contrived Immortals like me. Since Contrived Immortals are usually familiars, we won't die even if injured fatally, provided we aren't in our animal form. If we're in our normal form we can get sick, or hurt, and we'd simply heal from it at the rate a mortal would. Usually though, if you're contracted to a strong Fully-Fledged Immortal, they can take your damage. The stronger ones like Li Wei and Li Jun can heal their physical wounds really easily. But with things like viruses and mental illnesses, they have difficulty healing from them, and they can't take those away from their Contrived Immortal dependent either."
"I see... So what hat type of Immortal is the King?"
"He's a semi-immortal." Ji Ru said, his voice going slightly funny as he stretched. Tai Yang gave him an odd look.
"He's a Semi, and Li Jun and Li Wei are Fully-Fledged? How come?"
"Well, they had different goals." Ji Ru said. "Li Jun became Fully-Fledged because someone he loved was really ill."
Tai Yang blinked at that. "Li Jun loved someone?"
Ji Ru snorted. "I know, even I was shocked. I know it was a woman, but Li Wei said he couldn't tell me beyond that, because it wasn't his place. Everyone in the castle knows not to talk about it. If you do, and Li Jun finds out, he'll execute you."
Tai Yang shivered. "So that's why he has that cage in his bedroom." He thought out loud. "That's my hypothesis too." Ji Ru said, rubbing his eye.
"Then when did he start to like Xiao Xia? He said he liked her for centuries." Tai Yang asked.
Ji Ru hummed. 'Tai Yang seems quite intrigued by all this.' He mused, then answered Tai Yang. "He's exaggerating a bit. I think it's only been a century or two. Well, lemme see... He's 479, and he reached immortality at 29 years old... I think he had a familiar for 40 to 50 years or so and Xiao Xia was born somewhere around fifty years before he was born. I'm not completely sure about that. Either way, I don't think he liked her immediately after his familiar's death." Ji Ru squinted in thought and looked to a wide-eyed Tai Yang.
"What?"
"Li Jun was with someone for that long? That's half a century."
"Why are you impressed by that?" Ji Ru waved his hand. "I've been married for most of my life. That's like 269 years you know, my record is more impressive."
Tai Yang scratched his cheek. "This is true. But I mean, you and Li Wei are quite kind, and Li Jun, he's... I- Well..." Ji Ru nodded, indicating that he knew exactly what Tai Yang meant. "I guess it's shocking that Li Jun loved someone that much in the first place. He seems so-
A silver flash of light flew into the room and into Ji Ru's temple. He quickly held up a finger to Tai Yang.
"Sorry, Sorry! Hold that thought, Sunshine. I'll be right back. Just a second." Ji Ru said, quickly jumping out of bed.
"Where are you going?" Tai Yang asked, sitting up.
"I've been summoned by Changying's well-mannered, non-imposing, first-born prince." Ji Ru said scrunching up his nose. "I won't be long though." He said walking to the door. When he slipped out, the door promptly closed, leaving Tai Yang alone for the first time in three days.
"Oh my goodness." He said, flopping backward. "First of all," He said jumping up and out of bed, "What the hell am I doing, actually thinking of doing this?" He started to pace. "Secondly. Oh my gosh."
Pointing to his bed, "You there, you are now Bed-Jiejie the Second. I accept you into my party. Now listen up." Letting out an enormous sigh he held his head and started to walk back and forth.
"So this isn't a dream. Okay. Fine. I see. I see. I'm in another Universe called Universe 394, in Milky Way 394, on the planet Earth 394. And what do they do here, you may ask?" He looked at Bed-Jiejie the Second.
"They're psychopaths. Insane. And they have animal parts, and they have magic, and they cultivate those weird magical skills to reach immortality, but they can die even if they are immortal in some cases. And they have four-ply toilet paper which feels so good compared to one-ply-" he clenched one fist and covered his eyes with his other hand. "-really, if it were any softer I'd be wiping my butt with a baby blanket."
He let out a groan. "But I want to go home! I want noodles, my goodness, I want some cheap cup noodles and a gherkin! UGH! XIAO XIA! You- I- That's not fair! UGHHHHHH!" He dropped to his knees and let out a loud groan.
"But Tai Yang, you can't let them die you know. You can't be that nasty. These are innocent people." He said, jumping to his feet, pacing once more. "But then again, that rotten, spoiled prince keeps you in a cage! Are you really going to stay that long in a cage?! This could take forever! And what if those people are not really good people? What if they're creepy like that so-called-prince?" He jumped up and walked around Bed-Jiejie the Second. "But if you really think about it, maybe he doesn't realize how creepy it is to keep a person in a birdcage, I mean, his lady familiar lived there."
Tai Yang gasped. "Wait, if she was a Contrived Immortal like Ji Ru, then how did she die?" He held his head in horror, gasping again and looking at Bed-Jiejie the Second. "You think he executed her? Is it possible to like, Un-familiarize someone if you don't like them anymore? You think that could be a thing over here?"