26 26

1976, 29 June- Tuesday

He was sitting in his room rushing to rip the seal of the letter he had gotten. He was rather curious about what was inside seeing as the seal was on from the House of Carlsden, Hadrianus' House. He hadn't seen him since he had begun attending Durmstrang, having stayed in Germany and had yet to come back to England for a visit.

"You can't take lessons from him." Polaris heard his brother state yet again. His brother had refused to leave his room for some reason, just reading a book on the couch in the corner, going on random rants about how it was dangerous to be learning from the dark lord and here he was going again.

He turned his head to his brother, halting opening the letter as he stared at him with a raised brow, "Well mother seemed so ecstatic about the thought of having been asked to take lessons with him. That's the happiest I've ever seen her in years and father… hm, and father I don't know, he didn't seem to really care all that much, just like he could care less that mother wishes for you to join the servants."

"Their not servants," Regulus found himself awkwardly replying, "Oh? I'm starting to think we're talking about something different entirely if you deny they aren't servants. Servants literally do the bidding of their masters, are you telling me Bellatrix isn't a servant?" Polaris responded as he raised a brow, his arm rolled off the back of his chair as his other hand rested on the desk he was sitting before, resting on top of the unsealed letter.

"You know, I really don't want to be a part of this mess. I told the mother that once and she…"

"…Oh." That was all Polaris said staring at his brother's hardened face.

"Well, I don't know what else to say in all honesty. All I can say is I think the whole thing is stupid, I get it we don't like muggle-borns but why go through the lengths of killing them. All in all, I thought purebloods liked flaunting their superiority over them… and I do somewhat understand why muggles may be a threat even if they don't seem like it, there are muggles who could do rather dangerous things if they were ever to find out of the existence of wizards… Obscurus for example… muggles, are the reason this happens- perhaps we should just integrate muggle-borns into our world when it is known they have magic or something," Polaris spoke again leaving Regulus baffled.

"Or something?" his brother drawled, Polaris just shrugged, "I don't know, I just saying stuff, it's not like it'll happen and I doubt the muggle-borns would appreciate being taken from their parents if not all of them at least the ones at aren't being treated right and the ones that are orphans."

"Right… then become the next minister, and push your interesting opinions on the British wizarding world," Regulus said sarcastically, though he didn't think it was much of a bad idea to integrate muggle-borns who are being mistreated and the orphaned ones into their world, seeing as they would at least learn the wizarding culture from a young age and wouldn't be so ignorant as others would complain about.

Regulus still didn't overly like the idea of being branded. He had remembered seeing his cousin's mark, a mark to show him the proof of her undying loyalty to the dark lord, the thought of knowing that it was most likely her that had killed that family in Helford didn't sit right with him.

He just knew that she would be so proud to boast about it to any pureblood that would listen. As if she was doing Merlin's work. She praised the man as though he was Merlin himself, it confused Regulus to the extent he was questioning her sanity as a whole.

His friend Snape even had an interest himself in joining and Regulus couldn't see why, seeing as he liked that mudblood in red, perhaps he felt as though he had something to prove to the rest of their housemates, seeing as not many of them liked nor respected him.

"So you're not going to complain about having to learn from Lord Gaunt?" Regulus asked and Polaris shrugged.

"I might not like the man but that's a brilliant opportunity that I'd be stupid enough to say no to. Apparently, I'm more than special, did he call you special? No? Hmm, I suppose you're just ordinary, how unfortunate." Polaris said dramatically, leaving Regulus to huff in annoyance.

"It's getting to you're head, he probably only said that to manipulate you. You're twelve, what twelve-year-old wouldn't want to hear that, from someone as powerful as him to think you have potential he's willing to waste his precious time teaching a brat. Besides Legilimency is difficult, there's barely any teacher. Father had Sirius take lessons when he was eleven and that failed badly seeing as he lasted on one lesson before he begged and begged and right out refused to sit in another lesson. Then there's me I think I lasted three lessons, at some point I through up… the concept is strange, the man kept telling them to clear my mind how stupid is that? I literally had a clear mind but nothing happened it was a waste of time and I got tired of him seeing my memories."

Polaris hummed, "Then we'll see whose the superior sibling after all- when did you try Legilimency?"

"After my first year at Hogwarts."

Polaris hummed again as he turned away from his brother concentrating on the letter again as he opened it, "Hadrianus sent me a letter" Polaris spoke out.

"Good for you," Regulus drawled in disinterest finally deciding to leave his room, "I'm going to get ready now, I'll be going to the Avery Manor soon. Would you like to come? I'm sure you can just hang out with Corvus." Regulus offered as he lingered at the door. Polaris shook his head, having Regulus raise a brow having not expected that.

"Alright. Have fun I suppose…"

He turned to the letter once again.

Dear Polaris,

I'm sure it's obvious it's me, Hadrianus. Sorry, I haven't been in contact this year, I really couldn't have seeing as I got in trouble in my first week of second year which resulted in me being barred from sending owls, and my mother and father hadn't allowed me to come home for the holidays but now it's Summer and I'm home once again, though in Germany.

How are you? How's life? How's Hogwarts? I know you got into Slytherin and I just have to say the news of your brother got here which I had a laugh about, I really didn't see that coming- or did I hm, who knows, I mean I met the and let's just say it sounded like something he would do. So that means Regulus is heir now, right? That's bizarre, how does Regulus feel about that? Happy? Annoyed? I mean I think I'd be annoyed if I were a second sibling and then I was suddenly thrust into the world of more politics, seeing as you don't get much heir training as a spare and congratulations to you for graduating from spare of a spare to just spare. I'm rather proud of you, sorry I couldn't be there to see you graduate- I'm only joking.

Though don't bother answering any of all that, I don't want to read anything, I rather hear it all… so let's say on the 31st of June?

Yeah, surprise, my parents finally want us to come back to England for a visit, so I'll be seeing both you and Corvus invitation to the Estate so we can all catch up. I'm rather curious about your time at Hogwarts as I'm sure you're curious about how Durmstrang is, which I will be telling you is definitely better than Hogwarts. No wonder my father rathered me attending there.

I'm sure I was missed heavily, seeing as who wouldn't have missed my handsome face. I almost feel sorry for you seeing as I've only gotten more handsome. I'm sure you two will be looking like midgets at my side when you see how tall I've grown.

Hadrianus.

He smiled in amusement as he placed the letter down, deciding to ask his mother now before she disappeared to Merlin knows where and he knew his mother was planning another occasion and he rather not have it overlap seeing as he knew his mother would use it as an excuse fro him not to go.

There were only two places his mother was most of the time, which was either her bedroom or her private quatres which Regulus and himself were not permitted to enter. He remembered when he had been five and his brother Sirius had gone in wanting to know what the evil witch as he called her was hiding in there, seeing as she barred them from ever entering without her permission.

Polaris couldn't remember a time he had ever gone in not wanting to face her wrath, remembering how he had been caught, she had grounded him for a week not before… well her usual way of disciplining.

Arriving at her room, he had knocked a few times though he received no answer, so he decided to call Kreacher.

"Kreacher."

"Master Polaris called for Kreacher!"

He turned to the elf, "Yeah, I was just wondering where mother is?"

"Mistress Black has left to the Greengrass Manor, does Master Polaris be needing anything else?" the elf asked and Polaris shook his head, with that the elf disappeared leaving him annoyed having not caught her earlier.

He wasn't even surprised to know she had left without saying anything. He looked down the hall knowing that was the way to her private quatres, staring and staring before his feet began to move themselves as he let himself gravitate towards it.

His father was Merlin's knows where, and his brother was likely still getting ready to leave for the Avery's perhaps he was already there having taken the fireplace in his bedroom, leaving Polaris alone in the house.

There would be no one to know he was in there, other than Kreacher of course if his mother had tasked him with spying on her children which he doubted, seeing as Sirius was no longer with them.

He was there, right there humming in thought as he stared at the dark oak wood, then to the golden hand knob, rocking back and forth on his heels. He stared at the door contemplating the consequences of getting caught and would the consequences be worth it?

Or all he knew was there would be nothing interesting at all with there, was the risk bigger than his curiosity?

He remembered how Sirius used to always say, risks are worth taking, just trust your instincts.

With that thought lingering in his mind he opened the door ever so slowly, pushing it open to reveal a living room, as Sirius had mentioned after his punishment.

It was nothing interesting, he looked behind him seeing the empty hallways as he walked in further holding the door he slowly pushed it open looking through the small gap as he closed the door, finally closing it his hands still rested on the door knob. He released it turning around taking it all in, walking around along the walls which were cased with shelves, all filled with books.

Looking around the room, he saw an archway at the end leading to another room, an office area. It smelled of ink and potions it was rather overwhelming breathing it all in. He hadn't known his mother to brew things herself, though it wasn't as though he was with her 24/7.

The desk was situated in the middle of the room, the wall behind the desk covered by a large shelf, just as it was in the room before this one. Moving further into the room in a bored manner he turned around looking at everything. He couldn't understand why she would punish Sirius just for all this.

She had to be hiding something, why else would she be that angry to have given him that scar.

He saw the long table at the side of the door, with a cauldron, sitting in the centre, drawers underneath which likely held items used for potion making, and above it was shelves with boxes, of things. He moved towards the brewing table, looking at the cauldron that was clean. He still looked in it seeing ingredients sat at the bottom.

Perhaps his mother planned to brew something so she decided to just leave the ingredients she needed. He didn't dare touch it, afraid she would notice anything sat differently.

He looked to the right side of the cauldron seeing two small glass bottles. He leaned in close smelling them before drawing back quickly before coughing, scrunching his nose. The smell was rather strong, and even so, he couldn't tell what it was all he could do was remain curious as to what it was for.

Above the cauldron on the bottom shelf were five small glass bottles, each had the same cloudy water look to it.

Ignoring it he moved towards her desk, sitting back in her chair with a sigh, as he look around the plain-looking room having expected something else. Something interesting though he was faced with, though the drawer under the desk caught his interest seeing as it was slightly opened.

He thrummed his fingers against the wood of the desk.

Before pulling the drawer open. Why not? He already made himself at home in the office he might as well look in the drawer, even if he got caught he'd get in trouble so he might as well do everything anything he can.

He frowned seeing the sealed letters that filled the drawer, he took them out one by one, staring in confusion at them. Separating them according to the seal used on them, two different seals.

His lips thinned as a frown settled on his face, his hands set on his laps and he just stared at the envelope. He stared at a particular one, one that had a small ink stain on the corner, it was familiar which was why he was confused because these letters, the ones on the right were most definitely his, and he was certain the one with the ink stain had been sent to Sirius around the time he had began Hogwarts.

The others he wasn't too sure about, but the ink-stained one was one he didn't forget seeing as he remembered getting annoyed about it before forcing himself to just send as it was leaving the dark smudge there.

He grabbed the stained envelope before ripping the seal off taking the letter out and reading the first words.

'Dear Sirius'

He scanned through the letter before folding it, then he grabbed another riping it open without a care, and read it.

'Dear Sirius'

Again he ripped another, this one had been the first one he had written to Sirius.

'Dear Sirius Orion Black, scion of the Noble and Ancient House of Black'

It had been the first letter he had ever written, hence the title, only wanting to impress his brother, trying to start off formally. He barely remembered what was written but reading it there he remembered the words and what he had been thinking at the time. His hands shook slightly as his thoughts were clouded.

"Why? He found himself whispering to himself, it was quiet barely audible as he stared at the last unopen letter on the left pile he had formed, he knew they were his because of the seals. He didn't even want to open the last one, what point was there?

He was angry- livid.

His mother had them this whole time! She stopped them from ever reaching Sirius, she- she…but why?

Looking to the left pile he grabbed one, knowing they were Regulus' letters, he held it. Glancing at the others. He hadn't known Regulus had sent so many. Including the one he was holding they seemed to be ten in total. Ten-time Regulus had tried to contact Sirius, never receiving a reply. Polaris himself hadn't received a reply and now he knew.

He felt so foolish. He had never asked Sirius why he hadn't replied to the letters mostly because of pride. He didn't want Sirius to think he missed him nor cared about something so stupid. He just wanted to forget the humiliation he felt thinking that Sirius had opened and laughed with his friends about them, only to never reply.

Remembering his mother's words on Sirius not caring. He found the little hatred he had for her blossom into something wrathful. His mother was a liar, she decided them- all!

What did she hope would happen? The start of the fall out of the Black brothers? She definitely succeeded in doing so. That was time he began to resent his brother even though he hadn't wanted to admit it to himself.

He continued staring at the envelope in his hand, he wasn't going to open them. Respecting Regulus' privacy unsure what could be written in them remembering how sombre Regulus had been not receiving any responses and to have written ten letters. His brother must have been anger than he had been when he received nothing in return.

Quickly he gathered the letters in his arms, uncaring of how the room was left, rushing to his room and as he did he threw the letters onto his bed before grabbing some floo powder to call to the Avery Manor.

His head in the fire, he waited and received a response, "Um… Pol? Since when do you contact through fire?" Corvus was the one to respond.

"Since now, obviously." Polaris snarked.

"Din you get a letter from Had-f" before Corvus could finish speaking Polaris interrupted him, "As much as I would love to talk, I wanted to contact my brother, could you bring him? I just wanted to… well tell him something. I guess I'll tell you about it later," Polaris told him, Corvus nodded before disappearing, it only took about a minute for Regulus to appear.

"What." Regulus droned out.

"The letters! Remember when Sirius never replied to the letters when he began his first year? I found them in my mother's private quarters! She hid them- she stole them!" Polaris rushed out. Regulus frowned, "You went into Mother's private quarters? Pol are you trying to get on your mother's bad side!? You better have left everything as it was!" Regulus responded.

"Did you not hear me! I just told you our mother-"

"Look Polaris… I already know. I've known since my third year, I found out from her. It doesn't exactly change things, does it? So what if Sirius never got our letters… this is still shit between us, getting stupid letters isn't going to change that Polaris."

"…You- Reg, why didn't you tell me?" Polaris hissed in annoyance, Regulus was silent for a moment before shaking his head, "Polaris it wouldn't have changed things with Si-"

"I don't care about Sirius right now! I care more about the fact mother hid it! And now I care more about the fact you never told me! What else has she lied about that you know?" Polaris ranted, before huffing in annoyance his jaw clenching. He didn't want to wait for a response, "You know what forget it, I don't care anymore. You're right, it doesn't matter." With that the connection was lost having ended.

He sat on the floor in front of the unlit fireplace. He sat there for about a minute before standing up, walking slowly towards the letters, slowly picking the ones that were from Regulus. Then he promptly threw them to the floor in the middle of the room, using his feet he pushed the together. He stood there before them, his grey eyes shining brighter as they refected the flames that began to consume the letters before him. It doesn't matter, after all.

He nodded in satisfaction as all that was left was a pile of ash. He turned away from it heading towards the fireplace grabbing a handful of floo powder before calling out 'Diagon Alley' a gust of wind blew the pile of ash away.

⪧⪦⪧⪦⪧⪦⪧⪦

"Polaris?" he heard from behind him as he walked the streets, surprisingly it was his uncle.

"Uncle Al, surprise seeing you here… should you be in Germany or France or something, perhaps Fiji?" Polaris responded rather laxly, as he raised a brow, his hands sat in the bottom of his pockets. His uncle hummed as he closed the gap between them, dodging someone on the way.

"Well, I hardly doubt it's a crime to visit my home country now and then," Alphard responded which Polaris rolled his eyes at as he continued walking knowing his uncle would walk alongside him, "Just as it isn't a crime not to visit family." Polaris contributed, and Alphard groaned.

"I am visiting family, just…"

"Just not Walburga's family." Polaris mused, finishing what he didn't want to say, Alphard sent him a surprised look, "Walburga? Whatsoever happened to the word 'Mother'?" his uncle asked and Polaris shrugged his shoulders, "I'm angry though I don't think I have a reason to be angry. I think I'm overthinking things and I shouldn't I don't even know if it's something to be angry about." Polaris responded.

His uncle spared him a glance, humming, "What is it that sister of mine did, to have you sauntering the streets of Diagon Alley, with such messy hair. Your mother would certainly be livid if she were to find out."

"I don't care what mother thinks of me walking around with how my hair is. It's not a big deal, yet she'll make a big deal out of it, for no reason other than shaming the family name."

His uncle hummed again, "She has always had some strange obsession with the family name. I remember being younger had had her scold me as though she was my mother. She was rather cruel when she first got her wand too." Alphard told his nephew, who looked up at him.

"I still don't get why father married her of all people. I mean he's grandfather Acrtus' heir, he could have been married to anyone from any other house why try to become the Gaunts 2.0?"

His uncle snorted, "I'm not too sure… at first, my sister had expressed her interest in your father who right out rejected the confession. Though it only took a few years for him to somehow change his mind, your mother is a true Slytherin, certainly someone you need to be careful around. You never know what she'll do, seeing half the time she's predictable and others she's not."

Polaris didn't reply.

"What did she do?" His uncle finally asked, making Polaris look up at him again. "It's not even a big deal I just don't know why it bothers me so much… it shouldn't I guess? She hid letters I had sent to Sirius when he first began his first year. She seemed to have implied that Sirius no longer had a need for us. Regulus seems perfectly fine with it, having known before me, and me having to find out by finding them myself."

"That certainly sounds like something she would do. Want to know what I think?" Alphard asked his nephew who looked at him with a curious look, "Go for it." He merely answered.

"I think you have the right to be feeling how you're feeling. She lied, it's obvious she did what she did for a reason. In all honesty, I had noticed it from when the three of you were young, I could see her blatant favouritism. Sirius barely had time to grow before she began to judge him for the opinion she began forming. She rewarded Regulus for the littlest of things, in hope of having Sirius do the same and when he didn't she punished him, a repetitive cycle which stopped once Sirius left… I hope she isn't trying to divide you and Regulus now that Sirius is gone."

"No? I doubt she will unless I decide to take Sirius' path."

"Well.. will you take Sirius' path?" his uncle asked him and Polaris gave him a confused look for a second before shaking his head. "No, why would I? that's his path, I'm Polaris Black, not Sirius, I have my own path to walk, but I'm not sure which way it'll lead yet." He responded.

His uncle looked at him, though Polaris couldn't decipher the look he was giving him, before the man faced forward, "Come with me today." Was what his uncle told him before turning to him again, "I'm planning on visiting Andromeda right now."

Polaris stared up at him, the name repeating in his head Andromeda, his cousin.

"Oh… well, I don't think-" Polaris started but was cut off, "Trust me, I'm sure she'll want to see you. You'll get to meet little miss Nymph."

"I had heard she had a daughter but are you telling me she named her daughter Nymph?"

His uncle laughed before it settled done to chuckling, "No, no. Her name is Nymphadora, but I suppose you can call her Nymph for short though I think she'll just try to murder you right there and then."

Polaris chuckled lightly, finding himself wanting to say yes to going with him… though the thought of his mother finding out came to mind and that's when he decided- fuck it! He didn't care, he might as well pile up all his supposed wrongdoings. He hadn't even closed her doors nor the drawers so she would know someone was in there and she would know it was him well he was assuming she would and if she asked he planned on owning up.

Just like that he told his uncle 'Yes' and before he knew it they arrived in a wizarding village and were now standing outside a house with his uncle knocking on the door. He couldn't helo but feel slightly nervous seeing as he hadn't seen her since he was eight… it was eight right? he wasn't even sure anymore.

The door was answered then a short man with blonde wavy hair answered, smiling brightly as he saw Alphard, "Mr Black, welcome back to Great Britain, perhaps little Tonny will be able to convince you to stay this time." The man greeted him chuckling lightly.

His uncle snorted, smiling in amusement, as he hummed, "Perhaps. I'll be staying for a while, so I'm sure she'll be happy to have me visiting more often till then." Alphard then turned towards Polaris, gesturing to him, "Ed, might I introduce you to Polaris."

"Polaris Black." Polaris simply said staring at the man who seemed to have won over the heart of his cousin all those years and now father her child. The man brought out his hand for Polaris to shake, for a moment Polaris wasn't going to shake the muggle-born's hand. If it wasn't for his uncle Alphard at his side, he was sure things would have gone differently.

He sent a glance to his uncle who jerked his head towards the hand. Polaris faced the man again hesitantly taking the hand and shaking it. "You must be my wife's cousin unless Alphard Black decided to settle down years ago and decided not to tell anyone."

Polaris look at him blandly, while his uncle snorted, "Nothing of those sorts!" Alphard answered.

"And you must be the muggle-born that my cousin decided to bless with her marrying you." He told him, finally releasing his hand. The man laughed awkwardly, "Well you're right about that. I'm Edward Tonks, the man your cousin blessed… with a beautiful family. You can just call me Ted, I hope me calling you Polaris is fine?"

Polaris nodded, "Polaris is fine… Ted."

"Come in! Come in, I've had your lot standing out here for too long-" Edward then moved from the door, disappearing into the house only to yell, "We've got some family here!"

The man then turned back to them as they entered the house, "Tea? Coffee?" then he awkwardly looked to Polaris, "um… hot cholate?" Polaris gave him a look that spoke louder than he needed to.

"…Tea is fine Ted."

"The usual, Ted." His uncle added and the man rushed away and Polaris turned to his uncle, "Don't they have a house-elf?" he asked baffled, "They do, he's called Rade." Polaris just nodded deciding not to question anything as he looked around the foyer.

His uncle then turned to leave the foyer with Polaris following close behind him, "Ah, Pol you don't need to follow me unless you wish to see me release my bladder?" his uncle said in amusement, leaving Polaris stumped, huffing in annoyance, waving his uncle off as he turned towards the pictures on the wall.

It only took a few seconds for him to hear the patter of feet hitting the wooden floors and they were obviously in a rush, before he knew it he was met with dark brown eyes.

"Daddy said the family was here. Who are you? a burglar?" the little girl asked and he considered the question for a few questions, "A burglar?" he repeated the word she had just said, saying that she rolled her eyes crossing her arms, "Are you dumb or something?" she said as she scrunched her face in confusion before she huffed.

"No… but I'm Polaris, and you are?" he responded. She considered what he said for a moment pausing, her brows furrowing before they relaced and her eyes widened before she laughed, "I got that one!" she said as she bounced up and down.

He couldn't exactly say he knew what she was talking about.

"But I'm Tonny!" she told him, "Tonny? I was under the impression your name is Nymphadora?" Polaris said in amusement as he lowered himself to her height her face scrunched as she shook her name, "No! it's not. My name isn't Nymphadora! It's Tonny!"

What he didn't expect was to see her hair turn from the brown colour it was to a bright red.

"Your name is Nymphadora, I'm completely baffled as to why you hate it so much Nymphy, it's a beautiful name, sweety." A voice said coming from the arch. Polaris looked up, staring into familiar eyes ones he hadn't seen in so long. He didn't say anything but still stood in his crouched position and he watched the little girl argue with his cousin.

"Daddy said family was here! I think it was uncle Alfie!" she whined and Andromeda chuckled, "He's in the kitchen" she simply told her daughter and the girl's eyes lit up before rushing off.

Finally, he stood up straight, unsure what to say. "I'm-" before he continue what he was trying to say she wrapped her arms around him, "It's nice to see you again Pol," she said and for a moment he thought she was lying but that tone sounded like nothing ut the truth.

"I thought you would hate me…" Polaris found himself saying, "I almost didn't come with uncle Alphard." He said in a much-hushed tone.

"Why would I ever hate you Polaris? You were eight when our family decided I was no longer part of it."

"But I was a part of that family! So surely you should resent me a little?" he responded, "Well, how do you feel now?" she asked him and she started at her confused before his brows relaxed, his gaze looking towards the picture he had been looking at before.

"I… I think you're really happy with the little family you've made. I actually let him call me Polaris, so I suppose I don't dislike him, nor hate him- because he seems to make you happy… even if he's an um, muggle-born." He told her and she snorted.

She pinched his cheeks and he made a sound of protest, "Aww, little Pol is starting to have a change of heart. Merlin, it sounds like you forced yourself to say that Polaris, but it makes me happy you came and met Nymphadora."

"…She called me dumb."

His cousin laughed at him.

"And I'm guessing you've noticed you have a Metamorphmagus." He said in amusement

"Yes, Polaris."

"And um, a late congratulation on your wedding." He added.

She snorted before answering.

"Thank you Polaris," she said in amused.