Her Past

Warning: Strong, abusive, violent content ahead. Please proceed at your own risk!

Dear diary,

Hi, this is Meenakshi. I am writing today because I thought to share some unspoken things with you. These are my secrets that I am going to keep locked in you, forever.

So, it starts with July 6, XXXX. I was only six years old when I faced one of the most devastating incidents of my life.

I was an orphan and was adopted by my Baba, or that was what everyone told me. I thought of him as one of my idols because he treated me well in front of others, but things changed from that day. I came home late that day because of my extra classes and I didn't inform him. So I expected a little bit of scolding from him. But when I entered the house, I found him sitting on his couch reading a newspaper. His face was stoic but dark, sending chills down my spine. I gathered my courage to speak 'Baba!'

"You're late!"

"I am sorry Baba! I had my extra classes, so I stayed back. I forgot to inform you then."

"You know what, a father expects her daughter to inform him everything, even if they are at school. I think I should teach you some manners from now." I gulped in, scared of the way he spoke to me. There was something evil about him, very evil. He stood up from the couch and signalled me to come with him.

We reached a dark-coloured door. I recognized this door before, it always remained closed. But why did he bring me here? I watched him open the door with a key. He went inside the room, signalling me to get inside. The moment I got inside, my jaw dropped. It was a dark walled room with red curtains on the high ceiling windows adding a creepy look to it. But what caught me off guard was the instruments that were placed on a variety of showcases. Some were like big ropes, lashes, belts, and weird-looking guns. As a child, they intrigued me to the highest. I ran to one of the showcases to touch them.

"Do you like them?" he asked me.

"What are these, Baba?"

"You will know soon." Before I could understand anything, he dragged me by my hand and made me sit on a chair. He cuffed my hands and legs with the straps on it. I couldn't move.

"Baba, why did you make me sit like this? Please open them na, I can't move.

I started to move, but nothing happened."

"I will teach you a lesson today the you will always remember."He turned to the other side of the room and brought a weird-looking belt.

"Lesson number, never defy your father."

With that the belt came on my face, hitting me hard. It stung a lot. I felt my soft cheeks burning. A second one hit me all of a sudden, making my other cheek burn. Tears started rolling from my eyes.

"Please Baba, don't do this. Please, I won't do this again. I promise. Please don't do... Ahhhhhhh... Ahhhhh"

He hit me again, more hard on my hands.

"You defy me again, I will beat the hell out of you."

With that came another and then another hitting my knees.

"Please Baba, please. I beg you. Please don't do this. It hurts... Ahhhhhhh... No... Please, Baba..."

I screamed, begging him to stop. But all was in vain. He hit me like a monster, constantly.

But then suddenly, he stopped hitting me. I was shocked. He untied me from the chair and I felt relieved. But who knew, that it was for the worse. He pulled me in his arms and threw me on the bed. Before I could react, he started undressing me. He unbuttoned my school dress. I revolted, but it was all useless.

"No! Baba! What are you doing! Please leave me! No."

Within a few minutes, I was in my undies. His hand pulled my skirt, exposing my underwear.

I shouted, screamed at the top of my lungs but no one came for my help. It was obvious that as a kid, I was too weak to fight him.

And then I felt it happen. He was inside me. He started moving. I felt tears rolling down my eyes as the pain was intolerable.

"Please! Please! Leave me here!"

I kept crying, but it didn't affect him the least because he was getting what he wanted.

This day, this very day got imprinted in my mind. It still haunts me. As a child, I could not save myself from that devil. He continued things from that day on.

I remember, one day he brought one of his friends to the house and told him about me. That man was just like him. They both tried to rape me, but as defence, I broke a plate on one of their heads and ran away from that house. I could have escaped, but I did a big mistake. I ran to the police. The police uncle knew Baba. He contacted him immediately. I learned that day that my father was a powerful man. So I cannot escape him even if I want to.

He brought me back to that hell.

"You slut! How dare you leave me, huh! You didn't learn your lesson it seems."

"You are a demon! Do hell with your lessons! I hate you!" I shouted.

He chuckled at hearing my words.

"So that's it, huh! The little girl has got a mouth. I will make sure to destroy that little mouth of yours!"He caught me by his arm and dragged me towards the same room.

"No! Leave me, you bastard. Leave me!"

He threw me on the bed and I knew that he was going to rape me, but all I a sudden I felt dizzy. My vision was getting blur and I heard his voice.

"Meena! Meena! What the-"

I passed out then and there.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in short PTSD! This is what the doctors said, I was suffering from.

'Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a disorder that develops in some people who have experienced a shocking, scary, or dangerous event.'

Anyways, it did defend me from his lust. But the violence continued. To pacify his thirst, he brought a whore in the house whom he called his wife. She ill-treated me in his absence and he punished me if I did anything wrong with her, which I didn't.

Things turned out worse as I was turned into a full-time maid and did all the chores of the house. I got sick at times for not getting proper food, but who cared. I was jailed in my own house.

But in these worse nightmares also, I saw a small ray of hope and that was Ryan. He was the demon's son but was far away from his ideals. He treated me as his sister and at times saved me from that devil's wrath. I owe him a lot and I don't know if I can ever repay his debt to me. But I tried in every possible way. He is the only human that I saw in my life. And I love my brother to the core. I regularly pray to God for his well being. I saved him once from a girl whom I knew was not correct for him. He cried for days(he is so emotional), but I convinced him to move on and find someone better, who deserved him.

I think I wrote a lot of pages, my hand is paining. So, this much for today. I will share more with you the next day.

Till then,

Tata.

He closed the diary with a thud as tears trickled from his eyes. It was the eleventh time he was reading her diary. He felt guilt, anger, and immense pain each time he read it. But he still did, because he felt like she is with him, talking to him each time.

Dhruv POV

She got so much through her past and I always thought that I was the most struggling person in the world. But she never fell into the darkness like me. She was so strong. She never complained about it. She could have told me about her past and make me sympathize with her, but she didn't.

Oh, Meenakshi! How can I be so blind? I never saw the beauty in you, your strength and bravery. It is very difficult for any person to survive with such a pure soul even after facing the harsh realities. But you did. You were there for me when I was sick. You saved me, risking your own life. You loved me, even when I was so harsh with you.

I am so sorry, baby. I promise you that I will fill your life with all the joy a person can ever have. I will love you to the craziest and will never let anyone hurt you. Once I find you, I will never let you go!

End POV

Dhruv was engrossed in his thoughts when all of a sudden, something struck his mind. He hastily turned the pages of the diary and found a writing there.

Dear diary,

It was September 15, I was walking through the lake which used to be my favourite hideout. I saw a boy drowning in the water. I immediately rushed to him and pulled him out of it. He looked unconscious. I patted on his face, trying to get a response but he was lying there unconscious. So I decided to blow air in his mouth and pump the water out of him by pressing his chest. With the third blow, he started coughing and releasing water from his mouth. I felt hugely relieved. He looked pale but his eyes were sharp as a lion. I saw him trying to stand, so I gave him mine but he refused to take it. Weird boy, I thought. He stood up on his knees but was losing balance. So I held him, but he slapped my hand and ran away from there without even acknowledging me. I felt sad. I saved his life, at least he could have said a thank you!

Dhruv face grew pale as he recognized the date.

"No! It can't be."

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