Getting Her to Speak [Part 3]

Once Alexandra was out of the dining room, she hurried to the library and out the window onto one of the balconies. She didn't come here often, but after speaking with Robert, it seemed fitting. Here she could think without interruption. The garden had been the other place, until Trif had discovered her. School had been difficult for her because she had locked her words away, but now the professors had become even more insistent.

However, for Robert, the same amount of time had been harder. He had to rely on text and the little help his classmates gave him so he could skim by. Healers were supposed to help others, so why wasn't he receiving the help he needed? Why hadn't she noticed his need sooner? You were in the garden a lot. 'That's right,' she thought. 'I isolated myself. Another thing a healer shouldn't do.'

If anything, she would take the knowledge she had and open a school where people, like Robert, could learn with the necessary, individual attention required in order for them to succeed. To do that, she would have to speak and pass this last exam... or did she?

Alexandra left the balcony and returned to her room. Both Robert and Trif were sitting on her bed with depressed expressions. In her excitement, she missed Trif's question and started digging through her desk drawers for a list of other schools. She had just opened the last drawer when Trif's voice broke through.

"Ladybug, what's wrong?"

She stopped then shook her head when one of the professors walked by. Her attention turned back to the drawer of papers until she found one she was looking for. She folded it and pocketed it.

"Alexandra?"

She turned to Trif.

"What did you put in your pocket?"

She just smiled. Then her attention shifted to Robert, who was watching her. She signed something and he signed back.

"What did you say to him?"

She signed her response and Trif just looked at her.

Alexandra stood and had to lean against the desk to keep her balance. Trif grabbed her arm and she smiled appreciatively.

"Are you okay?"

She nodded.

"Why?"

Alexandra pointed to the door. There stood Professor Cherry. Robert stood and Trif stepped back.

"Trif. Robert. I'd like to speak with Alexandra alone, if you don't mind."

"Okay," Trif replied.

Alexandra followed Professor Cherry down the hall to one of the council rooms. The school board was there. She stood in the middle of the room as the professors sat in the chairs that lined the walls.

"Alexandra," Vice Director, Hector, began. "I have been informed that you can speak, but refuse to. Is this correct?"

She nodded.

"Why, might I ask?"

Alexandra lifted her hands to sign, but was stopped.

"Please speak your responses."

She shook her head.

"Then we will wait until you are ready to speak."

Since her hands were up, Alexandra signed anyways. She didn't know if any of the board members could sign, but she started to tell a story. The story was of a girl who looked pretty, but had the most horrible voice. It was because of her voice that she was shunned by the world. Then a young man came who was kind and sincere in his desire to hear her speak, but it had been so long since she had spoken that she found she could not.

"Alexandra," Lisa, the board member for creating new school chapters said. "Stories will not help you here."

Fatigue swept over her like a wave and she shifted unsteadily on her feet. Her knees weren't locked, so why was she feeling this way?

"We're waiting," she said.

The room started to turn white and she sunk to her knees and hung her head, trying to get this sudden light-headedness to fade. Voices could be heard, but it was taking all of her concentration to keep the white from enveloping her completely. Her body felt lighter now, but the white turned black and consumed her. When she woke again, she was lying on a couch. Lisa was kneeling next to her.

"How are you feeling?" she asked.

She signed, "What happened?"

"We were hoping you could tell us."

"Suddenly felt tired. Woke up here."

"You're not just saying that are you?"

Alexandra shook her head.

"Alexandra," Trif asked. "What's wrong?"

"She blacked out during our meeting," Lisa replied.

"What happened?" he asked, keeping Alexandra from sitting up.

"We requested she speak. She signed a story then blacked out."

"Sounds like too much stress."

Alexandra shook her head.

"Not stress?"

Another shake. "Nose bleeds when stressed too much," she signed.

"Then what was it?" Lisa asked.

She shrugged and closed her eyes for a moment before sitting up.

"Why won't you speak anymore?" Trif asked.

Alexandra just shook her head.

Trif left.

"I take it Trif is the young man from your story," Lisa said, when he was out of sight.

Alexandra nodded.

"If you could speak, why can't you now?"

"I haven't spoken to people in over ten years," she signed.

"Why did you stop in the first place?"

"Harsh words spoken by a common friend."

"Then..."

Alexandra shook her head. She was done answering questions. "If you will excuse me, I have a paper to finish."

"All right," Lisa said. "Would you like me to walk with you to your room?"

Alexandra shook her head.

She finished her paper in good time. All of the requirements had been met and so all that was left to do was turn it in. She had a little bit of time left. So, she took the list she had made of other herbal schools from her pocket and looked at them. Her plan had been to call them and see where those who were disabled were being accepted, hoping to get an idea on how to run a school like she wanted to. A knock drew her attention away.

It was Robert. "Why is Trif upset?" he signed. "He won't talk to me."

"I still don't want to speak," she signed back.

"Why did you stop in the first place?"

"My friend, Thomas."

"Did something happen to him?"

"Sometime later, which I didn't learn about until recently."

Closing her door behind her, Alexandra and Robert walked to the library where Lisa was reading. Lisa sat up as they approached and asked Alexandra to tell her the whole story.

It had been a cloudy day. She and Thomas had been laughing and playing together. His words seemed to come out of nowhere. She couldn't remember what she had done to bring them out, but they stung. 'Shut up, Alexandra! Your voice is too nasally and taints your looks. You would be better off silent.' After that her world fell into silence. She had run home and cried, his words hurt so much. For several days she stayed silent. Only occasionally would she venture to speak.

There was no nasal sound to any of her words. Still, she had come to trust Thomas to always tell her the truth. By the time she felt okay again, her words were locked away. It worried many and isolated her from others. Being of high social standing, it was unbecoming of her to be silent. Parties, either hosted or attended, became boring. Gossip and rumors flew in abundance about her sudden silence. There was no sign of Thomas either. She had not seen him since he rejected her silence.

A year passed and the rumors and gossip continued. However, she found interest in other things, other than the conversations going on around her. Various shades of green and all the different varieties of flowers had caught her attention. If being silent by choice hadn't been difficult for her family, her interest in plants certainly was. She made plans for further education, but she had to wait until she was old enough to leave the house before she could attend. Her family's disapproval was apparent and a few times they tried to improve their standing by leaving her at home when they went to parties. But the other hosts were insistent that she still attend.

As her interest in plants grew, she started to talk to the plants as she had observed one gardener doing. The sound of her voice startled her at first and didn't sound at all like her, but soon she became comfortable talking to the plants, but only when no one else was around. She listened to others judgments of her and decided it wasn't worth going through it all again if she decided to talk again. Then a few weeks ago, Trif informed her that Thomas would have come back to her and apologized had he not been afraid. But the apology meant nothing to her. The professors had pressed for her to speak and even made the final exam an oral pass/fail to get her to speak.

"Then the board was called on when you still didn't open up," Lisa said.

Alexandra nodded.

"I heard the professors talking about leaving the exam oral, hoping that you will talk then even if you refuse to now."

Alexandra nodded then excused herself.