11. Chapter 11

XI.

Darcy sighed audibly and raised one hand to his temple in a futile effort to rub his irritation away.

"Bingley," his voice did not entirely mask his feelings, "are you quite done? We must depart now or risk a late arrival."

The answering call did not soothe him: "Just coming now, Darce..."

He sighed yet again; he knew Bingley well enough to recognize that tone. In truth, Darcy was perhaps being a bit over cautious in his planning. Netherfield was not five miles from Longbourn and as it had been a clear day, there was no reason to suspect their trip would be delayed through problems of weather or roads. Nevertheless, Darcy's eager anticipation of this evening would not allow any possibility of tardiness; although if questioned, he would claim good breeding and manners necessitated the drastic measures he was presently planning.

Running up the stairs quickly, he let himself into Bingley's room without hesitation. Sure enough, the room was a wreck. There were items of clothing strewn about everywhere; Bingley himself was standing in front of his mirror with a look of utmost concentration as he held up various different vests, jackets, and cravats; and his poor valet was in the corner of the room with his face in his hands.

Some part of Darcy wished to laugh at his friend, but as he himself had specifically chosen his green vest because it reminded him of the flecks of green in Miss Elizabeth's eyes, he could not be so hypocritical. Nevertheless, the leader in Darcy would not permit this farce to continue and he swiftly stepped in to take control.

"Charles..."

Bingley obviously was too focused on his task to realize Darcy had entered the room and jumped at the closeness of the voice. "Gah! Darce, you scared me! I did not hear you come in."

Even in his ill humour, Darcy could not suppress the chuckle. "I am not surprised as you seemed rather intent. But Bingley, it is past time to depart if we wish to make it to Longbourn on time."

Charles sighed, clearly frustrated, "I know, I know! I do apologise, Darcy, but I have been dressing and re-dressing since we finished lunch. You must think me a complete dandy, but I wish to make the best impression possible on Miss Bennet and her family."

It was now Darcy's turn to sigh as he attempted to rein in his irritation. "I do understand, Charles, but perhaps you are over-thinking this." And then drawing from his own method – a fact that he would never admit to another living soul – Darcy asked, "Is there a particular colour or fabric that especially reminds you of Miss Bennet?"

At first Bingley looked more conflicted, but suddenly his face became clear and a wide smile appeared, "Darcy, you are a genius, man! Positively brilliant!"

Darcy watched as Charles searched through the piles on his bed, chair, and then finally in his armoire before releasing a triumphant noise and returning with a vest of pale blue with thin gold pinstripes.

Darcy allowed a small smile – he could easily see how this would bring thoughts of Miss Bennet to his friend – before arranging his features into a stern mask, "Excellent; it is about time. Now, if you please, I would like to arrive before the soup has gone cold."

Charles laughed as Darcy was leaving his room, "Darce, you cannot fool me for a moment! Do not pretend that you are not just as eager as I!"

Although Darcy's step faltered slightly with Bingley's remark, he chose to continue as though it were not worth his while to respond. If some part of him was nervous at Bingley's apparent observations of himself, he chose to put those concerns aside. He knew that he had no inappropriate intentions toward any of the inhabitants of Longbourn and so Bingley may speculate as he pleased.

Not ten minutes later, Bingley was ready and they were off.

ooOoo

The arrival of the Netherfield party was met with no little fanfare at the Bennet residence. Mrs. Bennet was stationed near the door for the twenty minutes leading up to their scheduled arrival and Kitty had found her favourite perch in an upstairs window where she would be the first to see horses or carriages approaching. Servants had been made aware that this dinner was of particular importance and therefore were all anxiously manning their assigned posts, awaiting further instructions.

Lizzy was quite sure that Kitty's shrieks of "They are here! Mr. Bingley has arrived!" could be heard clear to Meryton. She winced at the embarrassment she felt over Mr. Darcy hearing such vulgarities from her own sister, but not a moment later chastised herself for such foolish thoughts.

Mr. Darcy is well above us. I should not think such ridiculous thoughts as to wonder of his opinion of my family! Such thoughts suggest a union that would never occur, regardless of how proper or improper my sisters may be. I may enjoy his company and conversation, but I must not allow myself to contemplate more or I shall risk my own happiness!

By the time she had finished this little speech in her mind, she realized that all of her sisters had made their way into the drawing room to greet their guests. She made to join them, but paused above the stairs as she heard the familiar sounds of the front door opening. Lizzy held her breath and moved off to the side, watching from a corner she hoped was not visible from below.

Mrs. Bennet's voice carried nearly as much as Kitty's and Elizabeth cringed once again at the exuberant greeting: "Mr. Bingley! Welcome, welcome, Mr. Bingley! So good of you to join us!"

"Thank you kindly, madam! It is an honour and a privilege to be here! I can think of no place I would rather be!" came Mr. Bingley's enthusiastic reply.

Her mother's voice changed as she greeted the next member of the party, "Ah Mr. Darcy, welcome to you as well. We are glad you could accompany Mr. Bingley tonight." Elizabeth was mortified by the coolness of her mother's words toward Mr. Darcy, particularly by comparison to her enthusiasm for his friend, but she could do nothing from her hideout.

To his credit, Mr. Darcy responded with a civil and even tone. "Thank you, madam, for your hospitality in extending the invitation to include me."

Lizzy felt heat flush her face and neck at his voice – it had been several days since she had last heard it and her memories had not done him justice! She waited for the grating voices of Mr. Bingley's sisters, but they did not come.

"Well now," Mrs. Bennet's tone was warm and nearly flirtatious once again – must be speaking to Mr. Bingley, Elizabeth mused – "do come along to the drawing room. Dinner is almost ready."

Elizabeth was rather surprised to see her mother leading the way for only Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy toward their drawing room. Where are Caroline and Louisa? Surely my mother was not so rude as to fail to invite them? The horror of this possibility faded as she heard Mr. Bingley's voice apologise for their absence.

"I do wish to once again apologise for the unavoidable absence of my sisters this evening. I know that they did wish to be here, but sometimes such things cannot be helped. I do hope that my late notice did not cause too much inconvenience to you?"

"No, no, nonsense! While your sisters are always welcome, as long as we have you, we will not feel any loss."

The rest of their conversation was no longer within Lizzy's range, but just that was enough to mortify her entirely and she briefly considered retiring to her room and never emerging. She was quite sure she could not face Mr. Bingley, let alone Mr. Darcy! However, she soon remembered her dear sister, Jane, and for her sake, she found the will to move.

ooOoo

Mr. Darcy entered the Bennets' drawing room with great anticipation only to be severely disappointed.

Where is Miss Elizabeth?

He glanced about the room and observed Miss Bennet sitting on her own – by design, no doubt – the two younger sisters together giggling stupidly, and another rather plain sister staring at himself and Bingley in an uncomfortable way, as though she were both terrified and hopeful they would speak to her. Further viewing the room, he realized that Mr. Bennet was not within – how odd to be absent when guests are arriving – but another gentleman with whom he was not familiar was standing next to the sofa, eyes eagerly focused on their entry into the room. But no Elizabeth.

Before Darcy or Bingley could even entertain the idea of making conversation with the room's inhabitants, the unknown man was eagerly rushing forward, hands outstretched. It took all of Darcy's willpower to refrain from stepping backwards at the onslaught.

"Mr. Darcy! Mr. Bingley! Welcome, welcome!"

Even Bingley seemed stunned into silence – Does he know this man? It does not seem so...

"Gentlemen, I bid you welcome to Longbourn and may I say that it is such an honour to receive such noble and esteemed guests as yourselves! Why, although I am merely a guest like yourselves, I flatter myself that in the brief absence of our host and as I am a member of the family, the grave and magnificent duty of welcome falls to me to bestow."

And here he bowed rather formally, causing the silly sisters to giggle into their hands and hide their faces while Miss Bennet coloured slightly and looked down to her lap. Darcy could not see Mrs. Bennet, as she was to his side and he had quite lost the capacity for movement, but her silence, given her normal state of incessant chatter, seemed to confirm her shock as well.

Quite oblivious to the discomfort in the room, the strange gentleman rose from his bow and immediately moved closer to Darcy. "Mr. Darcy! Let me first give a particular welcome to you, as I know you are the nephew of my most honoured and esteemed patroness, Lady Catherine De Bourgh." And once again, he swept into that ridiculous bow, albeit more brief than his first, before continuing, "And, as she has entrusted me to the tedious and important task of spiritual guidance over that parish, I know that she esteems me almost as one of the family. In such, it is my duty and privilege to ensure that you are properly welcomed and received into our lowly home here. I assure you that my cousins and I will do whatever is needed to ensure that you are most well cared for."

Darcy was sure that his jaw would have fallen open in shock had he not been clenching nearly every muscle in his body, jaw included. He intended to respond when the man spoke yet again!

"Additionally, sir, I am sure that you will be quite pleased and relieved to hear that when I last left your aunt and" – here he smirked slightly – "fair cousin, they were both well and in good health. That was only this Sunday past, so I am quite confident that they remain so, which I know can only be a relief to you."

Now Darcy was shocked, outraged, and embarrassed! This would not do, but his breeding required a response. Thankfully, Bingley stepped in.

"Sir, I do say, that was quite a... uh, enthusiastic welcome! But I believe in your excellent welcoming, you have neglected to mention your name, so I am afraid you have us at a bit of a disadvantage."

Darcy relaxed a bit more when the attention turned to Bingley and gave a thanks to almighty God for Bingley's easy manners!

"Why, how right you are! I do apologise! Perhaps I might trouble my lovely Cousin Jane to assist with a proper introduction?" The look in his eyes and tone of his address made even Darcy uncomfortable and he felt Bingley stiffen at his side.

All eyes turned to Jane, who blushed so strongly that one not privy to the last five minutes might have thought she was taken with a severe fever.

However, Mrs. Bennet finally recovered her faculties and bustled in to salvage the situation. After all, had she not just this morning explained to Mr. Collins that Jane was soon to be engaged to Mr. Bingley? She tutted in her own mind at how men could be so foolish! Could he not see that his request of an introduction would likely lead Mr. Bingley to believe that there was some sort of understanding between Jane and himself? She sighed internally, The work of a mother is never done.

"Mr. Collins, please allow me!" Mrs. Bennet made the introductions, including nearly forcing Mr. Bingley to sit next to Jane before realizing that one daughter was missing; "My now, and where has Lizzy got off to?"

Elizabeth – who had been barely a few feet from the doorway – had heard the entire thing and found that since she had not been swallowed whole by the earth, she really must not continue to linger in the shadows. At her mother's query, Lizzy stepped forward.

"I am here, Mother."

Some tiny part of Elizabeth's mind felt immense gratification and her heart thumped wildly when she observed Mr. Darcy's head turn to her with a speed she had never seen. She reminded herself not to read into his behaviour. She smiled nonetheless.

"Good evening, Mr. Darcy, Mr. Bingley." She gave a simple curtsey.

Bingley greeted her from his place on the sofa next to Jane – likely unwilling to move in case Mr. Collins tries to seize the opportunity, Lizzy mused. He nodded his head once as he replied, "Good evening, Miss Elizabeth. Always a pleasure to see you."

Mr. Darcy, however, was still standing and so he turned and closed the two steps distance to Lizzy, bowing as he greeted her: "Miss Elizabeth, good evening. You look quite well." He risked a glance at her face as he rose from the bow, but he could not make out what she was thinking.

Just then, Hill came in to announce that dinner was ready.

Darcy acted quickly, taking his happiness into his own hands: "Miss Elizabeth, may I offer you an escort into dinner?"

He was gratified to see a slightly surprised, but nonetheless pleased look cross her face before she murmured her thanks and placed her hand upon his elbow.

A strange noise came from Mr. Collins who seemed midway through a step toward Elizabeth, but was now glancing back and forth between Jane and her, obviously observing that the two most attractive sisters were already secured as dinner companions. Thinking better than to challenge either of the other gentlemen, he quickly revised his plan and moved toward Cousin Mary, promptly offering her his services in to the dining room. He reasoned that he would simply ensure he was seated across from one of his lovelier cousins and then it would not matter which was seated next to him. He smiled at his own cleverness.

ooOoo

Darcy was simultaneously thrilled and aggravated at how the seating had worked out. Having walked in Miss Elizabeth, he was able to sit directly next to her. His heart pounded with the possibility of accidental touches and his nose was already seeking her fragrance; he reminisced over their time next to one another in church – Was that only three days ago? It felt so far away. On his other side was the lady's elder sister, who was both tolerable to be around and unlikely to attempt to distract his attention from Miss Elizabeth; in this, he was pleased.

However, as though specifically designed to interfere with his pleasure, somehow directly across from him was this Mr. Collins fellow. That man seemed determined to engage either or both of the ladies sitting beside Darcy. To Miss Elizabeth's left, at the head of the table, sat Mr. Bennet, who had barely said a word to Mr. Bingley or Mr. Darcy since he had greeted their arrival in the dining room. But much to Darcy's disappointment, he did speak a great deal to his clear favourite, Elizabeth. This left Darcy in a rather awkward situation as he was sandwiched between Miss Bennet – whose attentions were rather engaged by Bingley – and Miss Elizabeth, who did seem to be trying to reciprocate his attempts at conversation, but with Mr. Bennet and Mr. Collins also vying for her attention, it seemed a lost cause.

In theory, Darcy may have attempted conversation with Miss Mary, who was on Mr. Bennet's other side, but in practice, Darcy was never easy with new acquaintances and it did not seem this was a strong suit for Miss Mary either. He rationalized that it would be unwise to subject them both to such discomfort. So instead, he found himself sitting and eating quietly while listening to all of the conversations around the table.

In contrast to his friend, Bingley was enjoying himself immensely, as that gentleman was usually wont to do. Every morsel of food that entered his mouth was exclaimed upon – much to Mrs. Bennet's blushing delight! – and everything his angelic dinner companion spoke was entirely charming and captivating! He did not feel that there could be a more splendid way to spend an evening.

Sometime into the second course, the youngest girl – Miss Lydia it was! – boldly addressed Bingley to request, or rather demand, he follow through on his prior talk of hosting a ball at Netherfield. Darcy was appalled at her directness, but Bingley seemed unaffected, perhaps even pleased.

"Mr. Bingley," she had interrupted a conversation between Miss Bennet and Mr. Bingley, "I wonder if you have remembered your promise to host a ball once you settled in at Netherfield? It seems to me that now you ought to be properly settled..."

Bingley, clever man he was, decided against correcting her presumption and instead acquiesced: "In fact, Miss Lydia, I must admit to having almost entirely forgot! However, you shall find that I am a man of my word and what's more, I would be delighted to have a ball just as soon as Caroline can arrange it!"

This announcement was met with cheers by Mrs. Bennet, Kitty, and Lydia, much to the increasing embarrassment and horror of Elizabeth, who was already nearly purple from holding her breath after Lydia's brazen demand of Mr. Bingley! Jane, on the other hand, while more modest in her exuberance than her mother and youngest sisters, did flush with pleasure and her smile increased at Mr. Bingley's agreement. She was further gratified by Mr. Bingley's next statement.

"And I wonder if I may take this opportunity right now, Miss Bennet, to secure your hand for the first set?"

Jane's heart felt as though it would burst from the joy she felt at being so singled out by such an amiable, handsome, and worthy gentleman. Nevertheless, she was always a modest lady and so she allowed her smile to widen only slightly as she accepted graciously: "It would be an honour, Mr. Bingley, thank you."

Mr. Bingley's answering smile was so full and bright that Jane felt pleasantly warmed, as though sitting in the sun.

"The honour and pleasure are entirely mine, Miss Bennet."

Though the words were spoken softly, Darcy could hear them and was just contemplating if he might ask Miss Elizabeth for her first set when Mr. Collins' grating voice cut through his thoughts.

"And Cousin Elizabeth, I should like to follow along with Mr. Bingley's excellent example and take this opportunity of soliciting the first two dances with you."

It was not even a question and Elizabeth felt her cheeks redden with her anger at the presumption and poor manners of her cousin. However, she was well aware that there was no polite method by which she could refuse his request. She acceded with what grace she could muster, but her heart was most certainly not in it. She could feel Mr. Darcy's tension next to her and she wondered at its cause, but was in no position to ask as her idiot cousin was now rambling on about his plan to dance with all of his fair cousins. Sometime during this monotony, her father attempted to catch her attention, no doubt in order to make a joke at Mr. Collins' expense, but Elizabeth resolutely focused her attention on her plate; she was in no mood for such diversions at the moment.

By the next course, Darcy could not deny that he was sulking. Unsurprisingly, this was not a common experience for that gentleman. Being a man of many resources, it was quite unusual for him to want for anything, but yet he could not deny to himself that he was resentful of Mr. Collins' having secured the first dances with the only lady to have challenged, intrigued, and interested him in... well, perhaps ever.

He argued internally with the ridiculousness of such an emotion: to be jealous over anything that his aunt's parson had was completely absurd! And yet, he could not deny that he felt like he was seven again and George had taken his new boat; what is worse, George broke it so Darcy never even got to properly sail it on the lake! Ah, and there was the rub! What if this Mr. Collins did not make Elizabeth happy and then she would not be in high spirits to entertain himself... or worse! What if he did make her happy and then she refused Darcy's company in favour of his? He could not imagine her to have tender feelings for the man, but still, he was no judge of such things! He chanced a glance sideways at Miss Elizabeth, who was steadfastly refusing contact with either her father or Mr. Collins. Her cheeks were lightly pink, but whether a flush of pleasure or some other cause, he could not know.

But then, as though timed in synchronisation with one another, Elizabeth's face and gaze moved slightly, as though to covertly observe himself, just as he was doing with her! In that brief moment before both turned away, Darcy saw her frustration and embarrassment at being saddled with such a cousin. He recognized then how she was essentially forced to accept the request or else she would sit out the entire ball. He certainly did not want that! After all, he had still not been granted the dance he requested at Sir Lucas's! Quite without meaning to do so, his attitude suddenly shifted. He was no longer wallowing in his own disappointment, but now purpose-driven to alleviate Miss Elizabeth's discomfort; perhaps he could even convince Mr. Collins to politely withdraw...

As a man possessed of excellent wit, it was no surprise that he had formed a plan almost before even consciously intending to do so.

"So Mr. Collins, have you worked for my aunt long? It must be under a twelve-month as I have not previously seen you around Rosings Park."

"Ah, Mr. Darcy, indeed! You are quite right, sir, I have only recently had the privilege and honour of calling Lady Catherine my patroness."

"Very good. And have you often had the pleasure of Aunt Catherine's company or been to many events at Rosings?"

Mr. Collins' face became rather animated as he described with inordinate amounts of pleasure his complete history with Lady Catherine De Bourgh, including several dinners, many teas, and even a few instances of cards. "... So you see, I have been extremely blessed by her Ladyship to have been included so very often in the short time I have been under her employ."

"Ah well, that explains it then." This is nearly too easy!

"Explains what, sir?" Mr. Collins seemed slightly alarmed.

"Well, the ball, of course. You know, Mr. Collins, I must say that I am rather impressed at your independence! I have never known Aunt Catherine to condone dancing among members of the clergy, but I admire your courage. And, as you say, if she esteems you so highly, I am sure she will overlook one infraction." He was careful to affect a tone of nonchalance but did observe Collins' face grow quite pale at his words; he suppressed a laugh.

Elizabeth, not being privy to Darcy's plan, shot her head up so quickly it drew both gentlemen's attention. For his part, Mr. Bennet watched the exchange with great amusement; this was far superior to attempting mockery with Mary – that girl is much too serious!

Mr. Collins, having taken Mr. Darcy's words immediately to heart, was actually quite terrified at the prospect of doing anything that might displease his patroness! When he saw Miss Elizabeth's gaze rise from her plate, he took this as his cue.

"Ah Cousin Elizabeth, I see that you have also heard Mr. Darcy's words. I must admit that until now, I was quite ignorant of my noble patroness' opinion on clergy dancing, but of course, she is quite right that it would be unseemly."

Elizabeth could only nod her head. She dared not look at anyone except Mr. Collins and she dared not speak for fear she would interrupt what appeared to be a promising train of speech by that man.

"I realize now," he continued solemnly, "that it was overly hasty of me to request your hand for the dances at Mr. Bingley's upcoming ball. I was captured in the moment and by your... charms." Here, his eyes were not on her own and Elizabeth repressed a shudder. "I must beg your forgiveness and ask to be released from our commitment. It would not be right of me to act in a manner that is not befitting a man of the cloth."

Lizzy nearly laughed out loud, but managed to hold the swell of amusement, relief, and joy in check. She managed a rather odd smile and agreed, "Of course, you are quite right, Mr. Collins, to be so mindful of your patroness. I most certainly release you."

Mr. Collins' relief was evident; Mr. Darcy's was better hidden.

Still better, this topic had somehow interested Miss Mary and she began a discussion with Mr. Collins of the various types of improprieties regularly engaged in by many young ladies and gentlemen. Darcy was rather amused by the animation and vigor Miss Mary displayed at this subject; he considered that perhaps those with more reserved temperaments are only needing the correct topic... or partner.

Deciding to continue to press his new-found good fortune, Darcy quietly teased Miss Elizabeth: "Miss Elizabeth, you must accept my apology for costing you your dance partner."

"Indeed, sir, you should be sorry." The slight quirk of her lips upward was the only sign of her good humour. "Now who shall I dance the first set with? It is most upsetting."

His quiet chuckle made her stomach feel knotted, twisted, and fluttering all at the same time. "As it is my fault, perhaps you would allow me to make it up to you?"

"Pray tell, sir, how you would plan to do such a thing?"

"I should think it obvious! I must find you a new partner."

"Ah, but that cannot be an easy task, I think. Surely, all of the good partners have already been claimed by this point? After all, I do believe Mr. Bingley announced his intention of holding a ball at least ten minutes ago. By now, I fear it is too late and I will simply have to sit the first set out."

"Hmm," he pretended to muse, "you are quite right. Well, what is done is done and it cannot be changed. My deepest apologies, madam." And with that, he turned away and requested Bingley pass a rather appetizing potato dish. He congratulated himself on his rather clever strategising; Perhaps Richard has taught me something after all...

Elizabeth did not know what to make of the man! She had been suspicious of his conversation with her cousin, but pleased nonetheless to be gotten out of her obligation to him. When Mr. Darcy had begun teasing her – and she did believe he had been teasing – she thought that perhaps this was a step toward his asking her instead. But it had come to nothing, and rather abruptly at that. The disappointment she felt reminded her of her earlier talk to herself; He would never be interested in a woman of my status. I must not become attached! This reminder, although necessary, was unpleasant and so she soon found herself once again exclusively focused upon her plate.

Darcy, not realising her discomfort and believing she knew he was, indeed, teasing and did plan to ask her for her first set, perhaps after dinner, did not notice her distraction.

.

A/N: Dun dah dah duunnn! The elusive dinner (part 1) is up! I hope you enjoyed it and it has lived up to your expectations so far! Part 2 (aka Ch. 12) will be up as soon I can get it written.

BIG thank you's to Artemisdesari, Jump Highly, and Jedi Cler for their offers of help! Jedi Cler: a PM is a private message, like an email, for logged in users of FF. If you don't have a FF account, I can't communicate with you directly about the story. :(

And in case I don't say it enough: reviews make me want to sing with joy from rooftops! I read every single one (and I also try to respond to all that are enabled for PMs). I welcome constructive reviews telling me how you think I could do better (because I do want to do better!), as well as reviews that say you're enjoying my story (not gonna lie, these make me SUPER happy :)). Also, thank you to all those who added this story or me to alerts and favorites!