33 Grief

Morning greeted Hans' flat with warmth, contrasting sharply with the cold wind that could be seen through the blurry window.

The room was filled with the sound of a boiling liquid while the strong aroma of coffee permeated the air, reaching Hans's nostrils.

Sniffing twice, he remarked, "Ah, the gas, better turn it off before it burns."

He wasn't really rich so his stove still ran on gas and wasn't replaced by induction panels.

He removed the grey mocha from the stove before pouring it into a cup which was right before him and added the foamy milk he had prepared moments earlier.

He slowly sipped the hot cappuccino while turning to the morning news.

Despite somewhat becoming a coffee addict over the years and turning into a machine fueled by it, Hans still enjoyed the beverage, after all, it reminded him of the place he lived before coming to America, the place where he tasted it for the first time, his mother's hometown.

He had nothing but good memories from that place; however, after he turned twelve, they moved out of the country and returned to his father's home state, the USA. It took some time for Hans to adjust to this, but he eventually gave up the thoughts of returning to where he came from and also left his friends.

And now, he didn't have any intention of going back there.

Today was just another day for the world, but Hans was about to witness the consequences of his actions.

He needed to visit the homes of the deceased hunters who had accompanied him in the B-Rank gate expedition.

Following the military protocol, people had already gone and informed the family of the deceased about what happened to the adventurers, but as a sign of respect, Hans decided to deliver the compensation money himself.

A heavy sense of responsibility weighed on his shoulders as he prepared dozens of envelopes containing the compensation for every person. And when the clock ticked to 12:00, he departed, leaving in a cozy jacket.

Outside, the snowflakes slowly and gently drifted to the ground, accompanied by the chilly winter temperature that arrived in November.

A thin layer of white covered the walkway while the wet streets were holed by many puddles that rippled with every passing car.

Not every hunter was affluent, especially those in the lower tiers, so many of the houses of their relatives lived in the suburbs rather than the city center.

He moved around, walking his way to them even knowing that it was quite a long way.

After he arrived at the first address, he gazed at the house in front of him - a modest pre-built home with a red roof and a small front yard.

He clicked and rang the doorbell, letting the sound echo through the house.

"Drrrrrinnn."

The loud sound reached a middle-aged woman's ears, who got up from the sofa to open the door.

She watched through the peephole and was surprised to find a young man with a solemn expression painted on his face at her door.

The lady proceeded to open the door and asked with a gentle and soft tone, "What brings you here, young man? And what's with that long face? Has something wrong happened?"

Hans's face already wasn't lively, but an awful sensation surged up in him seeing the lone woman.

He felt so bad that he was tempted to say he just got the wrong house before walking away.

But he quickly regained his resolve and acted as planned.

"Miss, I've come here from the association."

The woman flinched and her gaze lowered.

"I've personally worked alongside your son and am deeply saddened by his passing. However, today I am here to deliver the compensation issued by the government in such cases."

He was ashamed, not because he was telling her something like that, but because he was lying to her.

He didn't actually know her son, Ethan Collins, rather, Hans just happened to work with him a couple of times and barely remembered his name and face, but how could he tell her that, how could he say that her son died a worthless death because of his fault.

Maybe, for the lady it would turn out better this way, making her think that her son died heroically for the country.

'Ethan Collins, I may not know you well, but rest assured, I'll watch over your mother.'

With that, he walked away, moved by the old lady's emotions just as she returned inside and started crying.

Her son was gone, he wasn't there anymore, her husband had left this world a couple of years ago, and now, even her young child wasn't there anymore.

Just like that, Hans continued doing the same all day, passing through countless houses and delivering the envelope.

Throughout the day, during his visits to numerous houses, Hans witnessed various reactions. When he visited the third house, the deceased's sister couldn't accept it, and screamed at him in anguish, "Take back your money!! I don't want those!! Give back my brother instead!!!"

Amidst the screams and tears, Hans was forced to leave the envelope in the mailbox.

Tears flowed freely as others mourned and called for their departed family members.

The sun dipped below the horizon, casting a golden glow over the neighborhood.

Meanwhile, Hans found himself in front of the last house he had to visit, the house of the previous fifth team leader, David Wilson.

Being somewhat richer than the others, David's house was comparatively bigger and not far from the city center.

Hans rang the doorbell for the fourteenth time today and answering the wooden door was a brown-haired child, who cheerfully welcomed him.

"What do you want?!" the kid asked curiously.

However, before Hans could answer, a loud voice came from inside the house, "Liaaamm, how many times have I told you not to open the door to strangers?!!"

"Ack" the kid almost jumped from the sudden scream before trying to defend himself.

"It-it's okay Mom,"

"It's just a guy, he-he looks like a kind person."

"Oh, don't trust guys like those, they're the worst ones," came the mother's reply which caused the kid to stand there and ponder hard about another response while Hans stood at the door with an awkward smile.

Despite the death of the father, this family was lively, and even though Hans felt somewhat happy about it, he wondered if there was something wrong.

The woman came to the doorway and chased the kid away, "Liam, next time you open the door to someone, you'll stay two weeks without your tablet.

"Haa? That's unfair!!!" the kid pouted before running in.

"Sigh.." the moment the kid left, the woman's face dropped, becoming gloomy and sad.

Two big dark circles underscored her tired eyes that stood out even more now that her smile had faded away.

Realization dawned on Hans – the kid was unaware of his father's death.

The mother had kept the news about his father to herself, keeping her child's life happy till she was able to.

"Ms… I'm here from the association," whispered Hans.

"Oh," just like all the previous families, the look on her face was empty and Hans could see some tears streaming down her eyes.

"I see, come inside, let's talk about it over a coffee," she spoke as loud as possible, to make the situation seem normal to the child, but Hans couldn't help but feel bad seeing her almost choke as she spoke.

"It's okay miss, I have a full agenda to attend," he replied in the same high tone before whispering, "He doesn't know right?" 

The woman nodded, her gaze empty yet tearful.

With a sigh, Hans continued with his low tone, "You are a good mother miss, I came here just to deliver this."

As he handed the envelope, the woman gazed at the money inside with a hint of disdain in her eyes, but still quietly accepted it.

Even if she didn't want to take the money paid by her husband's death, she was now alone and had a child to take care of, so she needed this financial aid.

After a quick mental reasoning, she thought that her husband would be happier this way so she decided to take the money.

After handing the letter, Hans left while the woman returned inside.

Her smile remained non-existent and her son, who saw it, asked in concern if something was wrong. At that moment, the woman made an important and painful decision, "Liam… come sit down, I have to tell you something."

Hans, returned home more depressed than ever and jumped on his bed, hugging the pillow.

All that he had seen today, all those broken families, all those people waiting for someone they cared for to return home left him despondent.

It was sad.

Sure he had always heard about situations like these and exactly for that reason, the moment he managed to get his family out of coma, Hans planned on retiring and living a normal life.

But after witnessing the sadness and pain it brought to people, now he wasn't completely sure about what he would do.

Maybe, he could avoid the death of many people and lessen the pain that might be incurred upon their loved ones.

"Well, I have to get there first, I'll think about it when I'm there."

With those words, Hans closed his eyes.

Throughout the night he tossed and turned in the bed while sleeping and had countless nightmares.

All which he had seen with his eyes during the day was now amplified in his mind while the sorrow only intensified in his dreams.