66. Chapter 66

Wow, I can't believe I've been doing this for a whole year! Thanks to all who are continuing to read and review, but I'll probably be wrapping this up in a few chapters as I think the story has run it's course. I don't have any plans for a sequel given my lack of inspiration, but if there is anything you'd like to see, feel free to leave a comment.

"Where are we going, Halstead?" Erin asked as he pulled into an empty space. "Nowhere is going to be open. It's like two in the morning."

"I know a place." He grinned cheekily and opened the door for his partner.

"We're almost on the University campus." Erin looked around, noticing the U Chicago flags flapping silently in the early fall breeze.

"Nobody will know that we're not in college." Jay opened the door to a Chinese restaurant that somehow was still open. "Come on, I've done this a million times."

"A million times huh?" Erin raised her eyebrows suspiciously, "Why have you been looking for two AM Chinese food a million times?"

"I don't know, I mean, sometimes, when I can't sleep, I go for a drive. And sometimes, I'd get hungry. And you know I love fried rice," he reminded her as they sat down at a booth. "And plus, I like to come here when there's no food at my place. Not like I have time for grocery shopping when we're been up for more than 36 hours."

Erin glanced at the menu. "Pork fried dumplings at two in the morning?"

"There's a first time for everything."

"How come you never told me about this place?" Erin closed her menu and folded her arms across her chest, "I'm your partner, Halstead. Have been for six months. And you know I love kung pau chicken. Can't believe you'd keep something like this from me."

"I'm full of surprises," Jay wiggled his eyebrows and received an eye-roll in return.

"Jay! Have you seen my-?" Erin glanced up when her partner held the left grey combat boot in front of her, "My left boot." She took it from him and scowled, "Can't find anything in this place."

"I know, I'm sorry about the boxes," Jay apologized, reaching a hand out to help his girlfriend up off the floor, "Didn't realize how much stuff I had."

Her eyes softened and she rested a palm on his chest, "Yeah, who knew you were such a girl, Halstead."

He rolled his eyes, "And who knew you could be so grumpy in the morning?"

Erin scrunched up her nose, "I haven't had coffee yet."

Jay gestured to the steaming mug that was resting on her bedside table, "I figured you were still asleep. Didn't realize your closet had exploded."

She chuckled and moved her hand from his chest to the buckle on his belt, "Well, I'm not the one with ten black t shirts, am I?"

"You definitely have ten grey ones," Jay retorted, slipping one of his t shirts over her head, "You're the one who needs to shower though babe."

Erin wrinkled her nose, "Is that your way of telling me I smell, Jay?" He smirked as she pawed at his black t shirt, "I plan on working up quite a sweat."

"I'm clean! And we'll be late."

"So be it," Erin replied huskily, fumbling with the button on his jeans, "We'll shower together after. Save some water."

"I-I don't think I can reach," Kate whispered, glancing up at the large fruit-bearing tree with wide eyes. Once the leaves turned, Jay remembered that Erin had never been apple picking, and neither had Kate. He did his research and found a place not too far outside Chicago, excited to get his family out of the city for some fresh air.

"Me either, baby. The apples are pretty high up there," Erin assured her, holding Kate's small hand in her own. The rows of trees boasted an array of colorful apples, ripe for the plucking. "I don't think Jay can reach either."

Kate widened her eyes, "Even though he's tall?"

"I'm afraid I'm not tall enough, Squirt," Jay smiled, sizing up the apple tree in front of them, "But you know what? I think, if I put you on my shoulders, you may be tall enough."

The little girl's eyes widened even farther, "I-I could sit up there?"

"Absolutely. If you would like to," Jay said quickly, not wanting to pressure his timid little girl into anything she was uncomfortable with, "Don't worry, I'll hold really tight."

"I be safe up on Jay's shoulders?" Kate looked to Erin worriedly and then up at Jay.

"Yep," Erin confirmed, brushing some of Kate's hair out of her face, "Do you want to try to reach the apples?"

Kate gave a shy smile and nodded. "Okay, I'm going to pick you up and put you on my shoulder," Jay explained, wanting to talk through the process with his little girl first so she knew what to expect, "And then you can try to reach, how does that sound?"

"Okay, here we go!" Jay boosted her into his arms and delicately placed her on his shoulders. Kate looked around in awe as she gripped the collar of Jay's light jacket tightly in her fists. "How's the view from up there?" Jay asked, tilting his head slightly, trying to get a read on what Kate thought of the experience.

"So high!" Kate exclaimed, glancing around the orchard. She looked down to Erin, "But I don't think I can reach still."

"What about that branch?" Erin gestured to a lower-hanging branch with a few red apples hanging, "Do you think you can reach that one?"

Kate looked up at the fruit and back down at Erin. "I-I-I don't wanna let go of Jay," she whispered, "I don't wanna fall."

"I won't let you fall, I promise. I have a good grip," Jay said, offering Erin a reassuring smile when she looked worriedly to her partner. She hadn't wanted to make the little girl feel unsafe in any way. "But you don't have to let go, kiddo."

Kate furrowed her brow upon another glance at the fruit. "I can try with one hand," she decided, carefully releasing her death grip on the right hand. She quickly returned it to the hold on Jay's coat. "B-but you catch me? If I fall?"

"Absolutely," Jay promised, "But you're not going to fall, Squirt, I promise."

Kate took another deep breath and reached out to the tree, a look of determination written across her delicate features. Erin quickly snapped a picture as the little girl grabbed an apple and tugged. "I got it!" Kate exclaimed, looking down at Erin excitedly.

"Wow, baby!" Erin beamed, "That looks delicious."

"Who's that Daddy?" Kate asked, standing at her father's side while he was putting away clean laundry. Erin was meeting with a CI, and Jay enlisted his little girl to help match her mother's multitude of mismatched socks. When he opened his sock drawer, a crumpled black and white picture fluttered to the floor. He had picked it up quickly, in the hopes that Kate wouldn't notice. Unfortunately, he wasn't quick enough.

"Uh, it's just an old friend of mine, Squirt," Jay replied quickly, shoving the picture underneath his winter socks. "Don't worry about it, okay?"

Kate looked unconvinced. "Are…you okay?" she asked quietly, watching her father's face become progressively more defeated. Jay gazed into the sock drawer, pulling the picture out again and staring at it sadly. "Daddy?"

"It's nothing, kiddo, really." Jay shook his head and blinked rapidly, "I'm fine."

She looked up at him, eyes soft, "But you look real sad. And now I'm worryin' 'bout you."

He chuckled and sat down on the bed. "Now why would you be worried about me?"

"Because you're sad." Kate watched as he held the photo in his hand. "I don't want you to be sad."

He smiled, the feeling of melancholy washing over him in waves. "Well, I guess I am a little sad."

Kate reached into the drawer and pulled out the crinkled photograph. It was a picture of a young boy, around seven years old, eyes bright and shining. "Is that you?" Kate murmured, running her forefinger over the picture.

"Um, no. It's my um, friend. Ben," Jay managed weakly. "He was a kid I used to know."

"He's not your friend anymore?" Kate looked up at her father with sad eyes. He shook his head, crinkling the photo in his hands.

"No, uh…he's not alive, um... he was killed. It happened a few years ago but um, around this time. So I was just thinking about him today."

"I'm sorry." Kate wrapped her arms around Jay's torso and hugged him tightly. "I didn't mean to make you sad."

"Oh no, kiddo. It's okay." Jay looked down at his sweet little girl. "I'm okay. Just glad I have you here."

"I love you lots, Daddy. And that boy was very lucky you were his friend." She kissed his arm gently and held closely.

"No, Erin!" Hank wrapped his strong arms around her shoulders as she barreled toward where Jay had fallen.

"Let me go!" She screamed, struggling against her almost-father's hold, "Let me go!"

"Hey, hey, hey," Dawson trapped one of her flailing arms, "Erin, hold on, we got this."

"That's my partner!" Erin choked out, gasping for a breath as she fought against the many arms holding her back, "That's my…Jay!"

"Just the vest," Jay's voice called out. Hank heaved a sigh of relief.

A myriad of emotions flowed through Erin's vein's as her partner, her fiancé, her best friend, emerged from behind the wall, unscathed. "I'm okay, I'm okay," Jay insisted, wiping his hands on his jeans, slowly approaching his girl. Hank and Dawson released their hold around her as he came closer. "I'm fine, Er."

She could barely hear him through the pounding in her ears and the sound of her own harsh pants. "You sure you're good, Halstead?" Hank asked, furrowing his brow and sizing up the detective.

"All good Sarge," Jay confirmed. He raised his arms, "Erin, I'm fine."

"Offenders either down or in custody," Ruzek confirmed, "And…yo, Linds, you good?" Erin was bent over, hands on her knees, sucking in air as she tried to take a breath.

"Erin," Hank's voice was urgent. He rested a hand on her back while her fiancé closed the gap between them.

"I'm fine," she managed, finally upright, "I-I just got the wind knocked out of me."

"You're not hurt, are you?" Jay asked quickly, placing his hands on her shoulders and giving her a good once-over. Erin shook her head and pushed his hands off, "No - don't touch me," she growled, her gaze turning cold. He stepped back in surprise.

"What's wrong?" He asked. Erin moved away from Voight and put her hands on her hips.

"What's wrong with me? What's wrong with you?!" Erin shouted, causing all uniforms in the area to turn their heads.

"We got the guy," Jay replied, "What exactly is the problem here?"

"That was really fucking reckless," Erin hissed, turning on her heel and heading for the exit.

Jay threw his hands up in frustration and stalked out. "Why the hell is she so mad?" he asked to nobody in particular, though Atwater was within earshot.

"No offense, man, but I do not want to get involved in your relationship," Atwater replied.

"You sure you're good, kid?" Hank asked his detective, "Thought you were going to pass out for a second there."

"No, 'm good," she insisted, glancing around the building, "We got the kids out?"

"Offenders in custody," Alvin confirmed, "But there was one kid that uh, looks like we didn't get here in time."

"Damn," she muttered. "Let's go question them." Erin turned for the Sierra.

"Nuh-uh, you're riding with me," Hank insisted, gesturing for her to get into his escalade. She grumbled but complied, arms folded against her vest.

"Are we ever going to talk about what happened back there?" Jay turned to Erin as they stood behind the glass while Alvin and Antonio questioned the main offender.

"Hank already bit my head off for being unprofessional, so you can save yourself the trouble," Erin replied, not taking her eyes off the suspect.

"Er," Jay said, rubbing his face tiredly, "We do this all the time. The whole damn job is dangerous."

She shook her head, still unwilling to even look at her partner. "Don't you think I know that?" Erin gritted out, "I know the job's dangerous. But it doesn't make it any easier to watch you sprint into an open warehouse where people are opening fire on all of us."

"There were kids in there!" Jay exclaimed, "And-"

"I know!" Erin interrupted, "I know, okay? It was irrational of me to freak out at you like that in front of everyone, so just drop it. We're past it."

Jay opened his mouth to reply, but closed it and took a deep breath. "Then why won't you look at me?" he asked softly.

"Because. If I look at you," her voice cracked slightly, "I'm fine."

"Babe," Jay whispered, reaching a hand out to touch hers, her knuckles white from gripping the edge of the two-way mirror, "Look at me, please."

She drew in a sharp breath and turned to him, eyes shining with tears. "You're not just my partner anymore, Jay," Erin managed, "You're our daughter's dad. And you got shot today. I could have lost you today."

"I know, and I'm sorry," Jay pulled her into his embrace, "I'll try to stop being so reckless, I promise."

"Good to see you two have sorted yourselves out," Hank approached the two detectives after they had returned to their workplace professionalism, "Jay, I already told Erin, but keep yourselves professional otherwise I'm separating you."

"Understood, Sarge," Jay nodded, "What's up?"

"The kid that didn't make it," Hank said quietly, "Fifteen year old Andre Urillio, turns out that he was one of the shooters."

"Damn," Erin breathed, "And those other kids?"

"His little brothers," Hank nodded, "They're with DCFS. But Halstead, the bullet that killed the kid came from your gun."

Erin and Jay were both silent as they absorbed the information, "It was a good shoot," Hank continued, "You took a bullet to the vest for crying out loud. But you're needed downtown tomorrow morning to talk it over with the commander. Al's gotta be there as well and it should be straightforward. A formality."

"I got it," Jay nodded solemnly, still processing the fact that he killed a teenager.

"You're done for the day, Halstead. And Erin, you too. I think Kate's downstairs with Platt." He patted Jay on the back, "I'll see you both tomorrow."

Erin placed a hand on Jay's chest, "Jay…"

"It's okay, Er," He said quickly, "Let's get Kate and head home, alright?"

"I'm going to head to bed," Erin set down the file she was reading on the coffee table and pushed herself up from the couch, "You comin'?"

The family had retreated to their apartment shortly after hearing the news that Jay killed the teenager who was a part of Intelligence's bust. Kate fell asleep on the car ride home and they both decided it would be best to gloss over the details of their day.

"I'll be there in a few," Jay glanced up from his file before turning back to it. "Night, babe."

"Are you sure you don't want to come to bed now? You look exhausted, Jay. It's been a long day and we could all use some rest." She bent down over the couch, wrapping her arms around her partner's neck.

"I'm fine, really." He turned his head, gently pressing a kiss to her lips. "You're even more beat than I am."

She unwound her arms, but paused in the doorway. "Are you sure you're okay? I mean, I know I asked you earlier but with things moving so quickly and-"

"Erin. Babe. I'm fine. I promise." Jay managed a smile. "Go get some rest. Please."

"Fine, but come to bed, okay?" Erin yawned and headed for bed.

Jay had intended to follow his partner, but his mind would not let him. Instead, he stayed up for hours, trying to take his mind off all the stress he was under. He worried about Kate, about work, about Erin, everything. Jay was awake to comfort Kate through two nightmares. He was awake for the 2am news, the 4am news and watched the sun rise. Only at five did he crawl onto his side of the bed so that Erin wouldn't know how distracted he was.

"Babe?" Erin murmured, turning her head toward her partner. He lay awake, staring at the ceiling. "What's going on? Why're you up?"

"Nothing, nothing. I'm all good. Go back to sleep." Jay reached his hand over to cup her cheek, "I'm sorry I woke you."

"Was it me? Did I wake you up?" Erin widened her eyes and then narrowed them at her partner, "Are you sure you're okay?"

"No, no, babe, just the wind. Everything's fine, promise."

"Where's Kate?"

"In bed. Go back to sleep Er, you've got two hours." He stroked her arm soothingly.

"Why isn't she in bed with us?" Erin asked, closing her eyes again. "Did you hear the monitor?"

"Yup," Jay lied. "Wasn't too bad, she didn't fully wake up. But you were really asleep."

"Daddy?" Kate asked at breakfast. "Do you gotta go to court today?"

Jay had been 'reading' the same column in the newspaper for the past ten minutes. "Daddy?" Kate asked again.

"Huh?" Jay looked up, receiving a concerned look from his partner. "What's up Squirt?"

"You're wearing your court suit. That's how come I asked if you were goin', 'cause Mommy doesn't have her blazer on." Kate looked curiously at her father, who stifled a yawn.

"Babe? Are you alright?" Erin asked, setting the spoon down in her lukewarm oatmeal. She stared at her partner worriedly, trying to communicate with him using just her eyes.

"I, um, didn't sleep well," Jay shrugged. "And yeah, kiddo, I gotta testify in this hearing, but it's going to be me and Uncle Al."

"You look like you barely slept at all," Erin commented, furrowing her brow at the sight of his red eyes.

"Does that mean you'll be done early?" Kate asked hopefully, glancing from Erin to Jay.

"I hope so," Jay paused. "It depends on if we get a case, but seeing as we just wrapped up a big one, I'm hoping Mommy and I will be done earlier. Maybe we could start the next Harry Potter book?"

"Yeah!" Kate nodded excitedly, "I like readin'."

Jay nodded, forcing a smile. "When we get home later we can start, sound good?"

"Go brush your teeth baby, we're heading out in five," Erin took a sip of her coffee and made sure her daughter had disappeared into the bathroom before giving Jay another knowing look. "Did you sleep at all last night?"

"I went to bed after you fell asleep," Jay turned back to the newspaper, "I'm good, really."

"Okay, well, you've been staring at the same page for the past fifteen minutes and you're barely functioning." Erin raised her eyebrows, "Talk to me Jay."

"It's an interesting article on the upcoming ice storm," Jay jabbed a finger at the column, "And it's April."

"That's a restaurant review, babe," Erin said gently, putting her hand on his forearm. "Look, if you're still stressed and not sleeping maybe you could try talking to someone because you evidently don't want to talk to me or-"

"I told you, I'm fine," he replied, folding the newspaper swiftly.

"You're clearly not fine, Jay, with the whole running into danger thing and the fact you can barely keep your eyes open yet you stay awake all night long-"

"I already apologized for that!" Jay rubbed his palms on his face. "Jesus Christ, Erin, what is this? You've got to stop nagging me. I'm fine!"

"Saying it over and over again doesn't make it true." Erin sat back in her chair and folded her arms.

"I've gotta be downtown," Jay snapped, getting up from the table and tossing the newspaper down. He snatched his keys off the counter, "I'll see you back at the district."

"Daddy?" Kate slowly came out of the bathroom, acutely aware of the tension in their apartment, "You leavin'?"

"Bye Squirt." He placed a hurried kiss on the top of her head before exiting the apartment, the door slamming loudly behind him.

Kate looked at her mother with wide eyes. "Mommy?"

Erin cleared her throat. "Ready to go?"

"Um, yes…" Kate glanced at the door, her mother and then the mess left on the table. "What happened? Where's Daddy going?"

"He has to get to a meeting all the way downtown, baby," Erin said, busying herself tidying up the kitchen. She took a few deep breaths before turning around and forcing a smile.

Oooo what's goin' on with Jay? Guess you'll have to stick around to find out!