45 Vows, Pledges, and Looming Threats
"I think I'm missing some context here..." said Ohta, watching as Soifon shed her hakama-style pants to reveal she was, in fact, wearing a black thong. Not just any old thong, though, but one with tiny pieces of fabric resembling a cat's ears.
Furrowing her brows to their limit, Soifon stared at Ohta with suspicion as she begrudgingly divulged, "Yoruichi-sama said I am to present myself to the man who speaks my true name in confidence..."
"Yeah, that's not happening," affirmed Ohta. "As enticing as the prospect of railing a Captain is, I'm currently trying to save my woman, not pick up stray kittens."
Though she wasn't particularly enthused by the prospect of presenting herself to a man, much less one she had just recently met, Soifon's gaze exuded severity as she said, "I swore an oath..."
Shrugging his shoulders, Ohta asserted, "That's between you and your former Mistress. Talk to her and get permission from Rukia, and I might consider it. Though, fair warning, the odds of me going along with it are pretty slim."
"..."
Staring up at Ohta with a mixture of fury, conflict, and moderate relief, Soifon remained silent for several seconds before asking, "What do you need me to do? No, more importantly, where can I find Yoruichi-sama?"
"I already told you," noted Ohta, clarifying, "She's currently looking after the others who invaded the Seireitei with me. You going to her would just cause problems, so be a good little kitten and wait until the day of Rukia's execution. When we interfere to rescue her, you can sneak off somewhere to chat, caress each other's kitties, or do whatever else the two of you get up to in private."
Though Ohta's manner of speaking was 'abhorrent,' Soifon's ears became red at the mention of 'caressing kitties' with her former Mistress. She had never heard the phrase before but immediately understood what it meant based on the circumstances.
"Then there's one last thing I need from you before I permit you to injure me..." said Soifon, earning a slight frown from Ohta as she petitioned, "I want you to pat my head or hold me while I drink in my former Mistress's scent..."
"Man, you're hopeless..." remarked Ohta. However, while Soifon's words didn't exactly enthuse him, he spread his arms and added, "Consider this a favor..."
While the notion of being indebted to Ohta vexed her considerably, Soifon didn't hesitate for too long before burying her face into his chest, sniffing him like a bloodhound rather than the kitten she was often compared. Her body tensed when he subsequently wrapped his arms around her, but she resisted the urge to extricate herself from his embrace by picturing him as her beloved Yoruichi-sama...
"You're getting a little low there..." remarked Ohta, referring to the fact that Soifon was gradually working down his body, likely searching for the location Yoruichi's scent was most concentrated. And since he didn't stop her, it wasn't long before she found it...
"Yoruichi-sama..." moaned Soifon, burying her nose into Ohta's crotch as if it weren't the object she most despised. Unfortunately, the moment she tried fingering herself, Ohta ended the creepy interaction before it could get further out of hand...
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After leaving Soifon's unconscious, moderately injured body embedded in a wall crater, at her behest, Ohta decided to lie low and wait for the news that he had defeated a Captain to circulate. He honestly felt cheated, but the alternative was exposing himself to one of the most lethal Zanpakuto in Soul Society's history.
Fortunately, as Ohta and Soifon had created a rather large disturbance when he 'defeated' her, it wasn't long before she was discovered by an investigative member of her very Squad. Shortly after that, a brand new alarm began to sound throughout the Seireitei, announcing the shift from a Red Alert state to Black, a sound code typically reserved for full-scale invasions...
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"Here you are..." said Yoruichi, appearing before Ohta in her cat form as he rested beneath the city streets of the Seireitei.
Opening his eyes, Ohta wore a deadpan expression as he stated, "Little Fēng sends her regards..."
Unable to hide her smile, Yoruichi displayed it proudly as she asked, "How far did the two of you go? I can't imagine you had sex but did you at least get her to strip...?"
"You're kind of fucked in the head, aren't you?" contended Ohta. "That girl is clearly a man-hater. Putting her in that kind of situation..."
Shaking his head, Ohta preempted Yoruichi's response, stating, "No, just forget it. I won't waste my time lecturing someone who's lived hundreds of years..."
"That's probably for the best," said Yoruichi. "The Soul Society's culture and 'logic' differs considerably from the human world. For a young man with modern sensibilities, our society must seem very 'backward' to you. However, there is a reason for that..."
"Let's hear it..." replied Ohta, believing Yoruichi was talking out of her ass but willing to hear what she had to say.
"Stagnation is a key element to maintaining the cycle of souls," attested Yoruichi. "If the Soul Society were progressive and made a conscientious effort to improve the conditions of those living within it, the afterlife would become even more crowded than it already is..."
Moving over and making herself comfortable in Ohta's lap, Yoruichi curled up in his lap as she added, "Unlike the human world, where there are six-billion people spread out across the globe, the Soul Society houses more than seventeen billion, split between East and West. Inversely, less than a million native souls dwell within the Seireitei. As for the Gotei 13, the main policing force for the entire Soul Society, there are only 3000-4000 active members and 2000 reserve members..."
"In other words, you're short-staffed..." muttered Ohta.
"That is a gross understatement..." replied Yoruichi, shrugging as she added, "But it's the truth. We simply lack the personnel and resources to improve conditions qualitatively, and even if we could, it would invariably disrupt the balance between the three worlds. The afterlife isn't meant to be a place you can tarry, accumulate wealth, and live as you please for an eternity. Its purpose is to offer a brief respite from the troubles you faced in life before allowing you to transition to the next..."
"So, you keep things 'boring' to ensure people don't get too comfortable?" asked Ohta.
"That's a bit of an oversimplification, but yes," replied Yoruichi, closing her eyes as she revealed, "The Shihouin Clan plays a vital role in that respect. We are known as the 'Guardians of the Heavenly-Vested Armaments' and the 'Defenders of the Realm.' We have safeguarded heavenly artifacts that could alter the very structure of reality. As a result...well, let's just say that my family is very 'conservative.' Humans might see value in progress, but we have watched countless civilizations rise and fall in the quest for ever-greater wealth and prosperity..."
Rolling onto her back so Ohta could have access to her belly, Yourichi parted her eyes just enough to reveal a faint golden glimmer as she softly appended, "You're free to live however you please, Yamada Ohta...but do not try to conform the Soul Society to your ideals. We have preserved the balance between the three realms for 1,008,496 years. Create a society that can endure more than ten thousand, and you might have a platform to stand on..."
As he couldn't imagine modern society enduring an additional hundred, Ohta found himself unable to respond to Yoruichi's words. In his previous life, the Third World War had devastated the planet, leaving much of the East and West Coasts of the United States in ruin, sinking most of Europe, turning all of Russia into an uninhabitable tundra, and effectively 'erasing' China as a country in less than three years. At the time of his death, more than seventeen years after the war had ended, most countries still hadn't restored power to their grids. Those that had power collapsed under the strain of a never-ending tide of refugees, some even being taken over by various religious or cult leaders inciting the masses to violence...
Noticing the sudden change in Ohta's 'aura,' Yoruichi raised her feline brows and questioned, "Did my words upset you? If so, that wasn't my intention. I was merely stating facts..."
Shaking his head, Ohta replied, "Just forget about it...so long as the Soul Society doesn't go out of its way to meddle in my affairs, I don't care how it's structured..."
"Yes, I am aware of that..." mused Yoruichi. "I just noticed you had been acting particularly 'vengeful' as of late. Like you're looking for any reason to destroy something. If it comes to that, feel free to destroy me in place of Soul Society. As the former and future leader of the Shihouin Clan, it's my duty to preserve the balance..."
To emphasize how she wanted Ohta to 'destroy' her, Yoruichi reverted to her human form, staring up at him with narrowed eyes as she lay atop his lap. She knew this would push his buttons, but with how often he pushed hers, Yoruichi considered this as getting even, a sentiment she knew Ohta was well-acquainted...
"You don't know when to give up, do you...?" asked Ohta, his expression morphing into a deadpan.
"It's more like I 'refuse' to give up..." countered Yoruichi. "You're the first man who has actively pushed away and tried to 'tame' me. I can't let that go without getting in a few parting shots..."
"But you 'will' move on, right...?" asked Ohta. He couldn't imagine a woman like Yoruichi settling down with a single partner unless they succeeded in 'taming' her. Native souls, assuming they weren't killed or suffered a soul-borne illness, had an average lifespan exceeding 3000 years. Members of the Five-turned-Four Great Clans could survive much, much longer due to their distinctive Reiryoku. Thus, even though Yourichi was well over two hundred years old, she still had a lot of life ahead of her. Literal millennia.
"Eventually..." admitted Yoruichi. "But, considering I made my trainwreck of a relationship with Kisuke work for sixty years, don't expect to get rid of me any time soon. You could kill me, of course, but then you'd have to live with the guilt of murdering a woman who was fascinated, if not slowly falling in love with you..."
"Don't say that..." said Ohta, frowning deeply. Unfortunately, as the words had already left Yoruichi's mouth, they were fated to fester in his mind like maggots in an overripe fruit. For women as beautiful as Yoruichi, the word love was a cheat-like weapon. Even if they were insincere, the notion that it might be true would forever haunt the people they said it to...
Closing her eyes, Yoruichi snuggled up to Ohta as she whispered, "Since you've absorbed the traits of my family, you will also live a very long time, Ohta. Even if I have to wait a hundred, a thousand, or even ten-thousand years, you 'will' be mine...eventually..."
"..."
Sneaking a peek at Ohta out of the corner of her eye, Yoruichi's teasing smile now seemed to exude a certain degree of 'sincerity' alongside the usual expectation. Seeing it caused Ohta to frown and clench his jaw, but his mind failed to stitch together more than three words. He hadn't even factored in the possibility of living more than a few decades, so now that Yoruichi had implanted it in his mind, his thoughts invariably strayed in a direction that heavily favored her. He might be able to remain faithful to Rukia for ten, twenty, maybe even a few hundred years, but he couldn't imagine any relationship enduring thousands. And now that Yoruichi had instilled in him the notion she would be waiting to 'collect' him, it would forever linger in the back of his mind...
"You're a fucking demon..." asserted Ohta.
Exhaling a scoffing chuckle, Yoruichi adopted a toothy, naturally alluring grin as she rebutted, "You know you love the attention..." before promptly turning into a cat to avoid Ohta's telegraphed but genuine attempt to stab her in the face...
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(A/N: More like a Succubus...)
