(Umaru Perspective) (Himouto! Umaru-chan)
I joined the classes right out of the hospital and by coincidence was assigned to the classroom where the cast of main characters are.
The plot started in the two days I was in the hospital, so all the waifus are already gathered at the academy.
I don't remember the timeline of Infinite Stratos since it wasn't a memorable anime, but I'm sure the important events are being rushed.
I don't know if this is because we came to this world, or if this is because of the supposed anomaly, but it's something strange.
So far we have found no trace of the anomaly, but my mind is saturated with the nonsense around me.
Honestly, I like animes based on action and a harem of submissive waifus since they are predictable, but interacting with people who only live to praise the protagonist is very boring…
The main cast of Infinite Stratos are waifus with cliché personalities; The childhood friend tsundere, the home-breaker woman with big breasts, the cold beauty hiding an adorable personality, the big-breasted girl with a kind heart…
The fact that most of the girls are tsunderes only makes things more annoying.
I like clichés because they are funny on a screen, but living them in person is a complete headache.
I already sound like my brother...
What makes things more annoying is that the idiot Hiroki looks like a child who was ignored by his parents, all the time he seeks to be the center of attention which makes him as annoying as a fly in the ear.
Worst of all, only I can see how annoying that little idiot is, everyone celebrates his stupidity.
Hiroki entered the women's locker room when most of the female cast, Medaka and I were changing.
Fortunately, I have a habit of dressing quickly or it would be hard to resist the urge to shoot the idiot.
The little jerk acted like he had the wrong locker room and was forgiven after making an innocent face. I had to fight the urge to vomit.
My dislike for Hiroki is obvious so it's been hard to make friends with other people. It's like the whole world revolves around that jerk, so people don't want to associate with me for bullying Hiroki.
It's currently lunchtime and I'm eating alone.
My friendship with the waifus in the chat room still exists despite my arguments with Hiroki, but they are too busy with their personal missions and I can only spend time with Medaka.
The truth is that Medaka and I have some trouble getting along as our ideals and moral values are too different.
Medaka is a supporter of Rousseau in thinking that people are good by nature, on the other hand, I follow my brother's belief that people are idiots by nature.
Medaka is very kind and sometimes she spends time with me since she is worried about seeing me alone, although she is usually busy herself and she has formed a kind of student council to help all the students in the academy. She is the stereotype of Mary Sue who seeks to save the world...
Although it depresses me to think that my brother is dying, the truth is that loneliness does not bother me, especially since now I have a strange companion to keep me company.
[...: n.n <3]
The strange eye that appeared in my chat room is not visible to the other chat members, only I can see her and read her messages.
The eye cannot speak, but we found a way to speak.
I used a method similar to that used by some patients with multiple sclerosis.
In my mind, I recite the alphabet and the eye gives me a cue to stop at a letter so she can make sentences.
Now I know the eye is called Paranoia, although it likes her when I call her Paranoia-chan.
It's a strange name, but at this point, strange is normal.
Paranoia-chan didn't want to tell me why she was helping me nor did she explain her identity to me, she just said that she was here to protect me.
I'm still surprised that I feel so trusting towards an unknown and suspicious entity, but I can't resist even if Paranoia-chan is controlling my mind, so it's useless to worry.
[...: 7-7]
Don't look at me like that, I know you hate mind control, Paranoia-chan would never do something that disgusting.
[...: n.n]
Using the alphabet method is very time-consuming so the important things are through sign language.
[...: !! <]
I sighed and tilted my head to the left, avoiding a small ball of wet paper that was pointed at my face.
In the distance, I saw Hiroki hiding after failing his stupid childish prank.
The exclamation points mean I have to dodge something, and the arrow says where I have to move to avoid danger.
Thank you Paranoia-chan.
[...: n.n]
There are many things I don't understand, but at least I don't feel alone.
It was lunch-time so I took out a packet of cookies made by my brother and ate one.
I don't know how long this trip will last so I'm trying to ration the food made by my brother.
Every day I only eat two or three things made by my brother, the rest of the food is the food of this world.
This academy is the most important place in this anime so the food is of the highest quality, but everything looks like tasteless plastic compared to my brother's food.
This is not just my perspective as a younger sister, my brother is really prodigious at cooking. If he were a woman, he would make an excellent waifu, although it is possible that he would be seen as a whore...
[...: 7-7]
Ugh, you're right, it's better not to think that kind of thing.
One good thing about eating alone is that I don't have to share the food made by my brother, just the smell of this cookie could attract most of the students.
I enjoyed the delicious taste of the chocolate chip cookie, but a strange light caught my eye.
Paranoia-chan's eye is usually opaque black like a corpse's eye, but now she is emitting a strange purple-blue light.
"Umaru-chan" – Medaka's cheerful voice came closer.
"Umaru-chan" – Medaka's cheerful voice came closer.
How strange, Medaka usually eats in the student council room so we never eat together.
I turned my gaze and saw that the Mary Sue was getting closer while she was holding a homemade bento box, she became interested in learning how to be a good wife after reading about the progress of her relationship with Zenkichi Hitoyoshi.
"Weren't you in the student council room?" - I wanted to satisfy my curiosity.
Medaka is similar to a Japanese salaryman, she is totally addicted to working and sometimes forgets to eat because of her work in the student council.
Hiroki wanted to take advantage of this and started acting like a younger brother who wants to take care of his hard-working older sister, he's even learning how to cook just to get closer to women, although considering he's a fanfic protagonist, he doesn't even need to work hard to become a world famous chef.
Stupid protagonists who have an easy life...
Medaka smiled wryly. – "Shinonono-san and Sarashiki-san argued again, but their fight caused Shinonono-san to trip over the computer so I'm free until the computer is fixed"
Even though I like anime, it makes me uncomfortable to call people by their last names, plus sometimes I forget to use Japanese honorifics so people sometimes think I'm being rude...
Mom showed me Japanese manners since I was little, but my brother was the one who really brought me up and he has always been rude.
Actually, I already finished my lunch, I only have to finish dessert so it's not bad to eat together with Medaka…
A!
I looked at Medaka, she had stopped talking and now she was drooling while she was looking at my right hand, or rather, she was looking at the cookie in my hand.
My brother says that one's own good-being comes before the greater good, so in a friendly and mature manner, I stuffed the entire cookie into my mouth and covered my lips with my hands.
"Hey! I was only going to ask you for a small piece!" – Medaka had the expression of a girl whose sweets were stolen.
I won't fall into that trap moe!
She used that expression to convince the other students to form a student council.
I won't deny that she is cute, her expression is so adorable that I want a dakimakura of her, but my brother's cookies are more valuable than waifus.
I won't hand over a single cookie made by my brother!
[...: 1]
… What?!
Are you saying I should give a cookie to the Mary Sue?!
[...: n.n]
No! These are my cookies!
[...: 7-7]
B-But, I don't know when I'll see my brother…
What will I do if my food reserve runs out before I return to my world?!
I'm going to die!
[...: … -.-]
Are you rolling your eyes?!
[...: -.-]
…
B-But… my cookies…
[...: …]
…
Okay…
But it will only be one!
[...: n.n]
I resisted the pain in my heart and looked at Medaka while I resisted the urge to run away.
"My brother made me some food before he went on a trip, so I don't have a lot of food, b-but I can give you some…" – I opened my inventory and took out a packet of cookies. – "W-We are friends so it is g-good to share…"
My heart is bleeding.
Medaka looked at the packet of cookies and swallowed hard at the smell of food.
Freshly baked cookies are much more delicious, but even if these cookies have been stored for several days, they still emit a delicious aroma that can make even the most discerning food taster salivate.
I took out a cookie and gave it to Medaka.
I must not cry, I must not cry...
Medaka accepted the cookie with a big smile.
Normally she is elegant to the point where she can embarrass the most conceited princesses, but this time she forgot all her manners and took a small bite of the cookie like she was a squirrel.
"Yummy! Ah~<3!" – Medaka made an exaggerated expression as she screamed with extreme joy, although that happiness was overshadowed by her strange moan.
That sounded like hentai audio…
I ignored that Medaka had an expression I've only seen in doujins tagged Mindbreak and took out two cookies for myself, then put the cookie packaging away.
I don't normally eat two cookies in a row, but my broken heart needs the taste of chocolate hazelnut.
Medaka slowly ate the cookie as if she was scared to finish the cookie, but she also had a smirk as if she had found the reason why she is alive.
It pains me to share the food my brother made, but seeing a Mary Sue being defeated by my brother's food gives me a great sense of pride.
My brother may be a serial killer, a womanizer with questionable fetishes and he may have possible alcohol problems that he inherited from our father, but my brother is always and will always be the best.
Ignoring Medaka's strange moans, it was nice to eat with a friend.
The only times I've eaten with a friend have been when Ebina visits us, although she's usually too nervous and always talks about my brother, so this is really the first time I've enjoyed a meal alone with a friend.
Medaka and I finished eating.
It was depressing to lose a cookie, but strangely, food tastes better when shared...
There was no point thinking about what he missed, so I smirked.
"It's sad that I can't keep eating that cookie anymore" – Medaka sighed, she had even used a handkerchief to collect the crumbs and eat them.
I smiled slightly wryly. – "That is why I have kept my brother's food a secret… but I can share a little food with you from time to time"
"Seriously?!" – Medaka had a bright smile, although she then seemed worried. – "But you seem to value that food a lot, besides that it is something your brother gave you…"
Her kindness is so radiant that my eyes hurt.
"My brother always says that only idiots are kind, but he's not here" – I smiled and scratched my cheek. – "Eating with a friend is nice"
My brother is always away, my father is often causing trouble, my mother has her head in the clouds, and Ebina can't visit me every day. Eating alone has become normal for me.
Although Medaka's naive idealism seems stupid to me, I like her.
"You really love your brother" – Medaka smiled kindly at me.
"Yes, he is the person I love the most" - I smiled wholeheartedly. – "Although I am a little glad that he is not here, he would go crazy if he knew that I not only left home without his permission, I even went to another world…"
If my brother finds out about this, I can already imagine him putting me in a cage.
... I felt a chill.
"Your brother isn't a nice person, but he must have a kind side for everything you've said about him" – Medaka seemed a little kinder than usual.
I scratched my cheek in embarrassment, maybe I'd talked too much about my brother.
At this rate, people will think I have a brocon complex or am some kind of incestuous pervert.
It is true that I love my brother with all my heart, but it is the love of a younger sister towards an older brother.
In a way, it's not an exaggeration to say that he is my father figure...
I started talking to Medaka about other topics like true friends.
Although I know Medaka because I read the Medaka Box manga, there are some things that don't appear in the manga.
Medaka told me about Zenkichi Hitoyoshi, the protagonist of Medaka Box.
Although I don't entirely like Zenkichi as the protagonist, he makes a good dynamic with Medaka as a voice of reason and a reliable ally, although listening to Medaka, I feel that her current love for Zenkichi is more like a crush in elementary school and not the devoted love of a wife.
One thing I've noticed is that the feelings of every woman who has interacted with Hiroki have been affected.
Medaka seemed to be paying too much attention to the little idiot, and part of her love for Zenkichi seemed to have faded, but now it seemed that love had returned, albeit in a more innocent way.
It's like Medaka's feelings had returned to her childhood crush, an immature and idealized love.
It's like her heart was reset at the beginning of the Medaka Box manga...
Maybe I'm just overthinking it.
"It was just an accident, I swear!" – A scream interrupted my happy moment with Medaka.
We are sitting under one of the windows of the academy and from the window, a little idiot had jumped.
That idiot did something perverted again, but his luck as a protagonist protects him...
My reflexes and perception are excellent from all the quick reaction games I usually play, so I was able to judge that Hiroki won't get hurt from that fall, but it seems that his face is aimed at Medaka's breasts.
A To Love-Ru style landing…
It's not the first time this has happened and I can't stop it, I can only sigh in relief that that idiot's perversions aren't directed at me.
Just when I thought Hiroki's face would be buried in Medaka's big breasts, something totally unexpected happened. Medaka stepped back and allowed Hiroki's face to hit the ground.
"Eh?" - I stared blankly...
The cliché just failed! Hurrah!
I mean... What?!
Medaka sighed and crossed her arms under her breasts. This made her big breasts rise, but the serious look on her face was a bit intimidating. – "Hiroki-san, you are already an adult, you should stop acting like a child even if you have that appearance"
.....
What?!
Nobody listened to me when I showed that Hiroki was a lolicon idiot with a chronological age that is over 30, but now Medaka is using her brain!
What's going on?!
Hiroki raised his face from the ground and looked at Medaka in shock, he is just as shocked as me.
Medaka started to lecture Hiroki, but both the idiot and I could only stare at the waifu in disbelief.
All the appreciation and affection that Medaka had shown since he started the chat room had been replaced with the serious and professional demeanor of a student council president.
I should be happy that Medaka snapped out of the apparent mind control spell infecting her mind, but it was all so sudden that I can't even jump for joy and make fun of the little jerk.
I am very confused...
[...: >:) ]
Paranoia-chan?
Do you know what is happening?!
[...: n.n]
Let's go, tell me it!
[...: c: ]
…Won't you tell me?
[...: c: ]
…
I reviewed all the events.
Let's see, a variable that could affect Medaka and that was something that has not happened until now...
Can not be.
Can my brother's food eliminate things that affect the mind?
[...: …]
Hey, don't be silent!
[...: …]
It doesn't matter, I can confirm this myself, but it's sad to lose my precious food…
Seeing Hiroki making an incredulous face is wonderful though~
I didn't think pissing off fanfic protagonists would be so much fun.
Let's see, the women in the chat room are busy with their missions, but maybe my brother's food can affect the waifus of Infinite Stratos.
Hiroki has become very close to the exhibitionist waifu, Tatenashi Sarashiki...
She will be the first to succumb to my brother's culinary talent!
Come on Paranoia-chan! Let's ruin the little degenerate's harem!
[...: >:D ]
Hehe.
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Author's Note:
Chapter 300! I'm very happy!
Thank you for all the support you have given me, I have no words to describe all the gratitude I have towards you, readers.
I hope you continue to enjoy my work and I wish you much happiness, I will continue to do the best that my limited literary abilities allow me.
Thanks for reading my work.
A big hug <3
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