The Festival (VIII)

Tsunade thought there was something liberating about walking through the streets of Konoha at night.

While she had already accepted that returning wasn't as terrible as she had previously thought, there had still been a lump in her throat when she first came back. Talking to the people who had been unexpectedly excited to see her considering she had been gone for years had helped her avoiding to fall into a darker mood, but she had only so much patience to waste on dealing with crowds, so once she used a Henge to hide herself, nothing stopped her mind from bringing up painful memories.

Now, however, the night helped to mask the familiar building, making them almost look like the ones she had seen in countless other villages and towns over the years. Still familiar enough to be comfortable and yet distinctly different enough to dull the edge of her pain.

Tsunade's current company probably helped as well, silent as they may be.

Just an hour ago, she would have laughed about the image of a silent Jiraiya, but now she didn't have the energy to be anything but thankful. While she might blame the alcohol for her exhausted state –which was ludicrous considering she hadn't drunk that much compared to her usual consume- she knew that it was truly the place itself that got to her.

It was just so mentally draining to be back here.

However, that wasn't necessarily a bad thing; being here in the heart of her home with the only two people from her childhood that she still had left and watching the starry sky on a cloudless night wasn't something she had thought she would do ever again.

It was nice.

If she was honest, this was probably the most peaceful she had been in a very long time.

"Ero-sennin! Jii-chan!"

It was just then that the peace was broken by a child's voice.

Tsunade had half a mind to punish the brat, a blond-haired boy wearing an orange kimono, for that, but when she saw him throwing himself into Jiraiya's waiting arms, the little anger she felt melted away.

So that's his godson, then, she thought with a small smile. I guess that idiot must have done at least something right if the boy likes him that much.

"Well, isn't that cute?" she chuckled before turning towards the boy that had accompanied the child. "And who might you be?"

"I'm Itachi Uchiha," he said with a bow, his ponytail falling over his shoulder in the process. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Tsunade-sama."

'Uchiha', huh… That was somewhat of a surprise as she couldn't spot a single Uchiha emblem on his dark blue kimono. Considering that clan loved to put it everywhere, that was rather unusual.

Tsunade didn't care much about the ancient feud between the Uchiha and Senju. She didn't even carry that surname anymore anyway. However, the countless triads of her granduncle during her youth had left their mark on her. Not so much in that she distrusted them, though, but in that she relived the annoyance she felt every time her granduncle brought them up all over again whenever she saw one.

"Any what business do you have with that brat?"

"I was merely accompanying Naruto to meet Jiraiya. A child shouldn't walk around all on their own this late in the night, after all."

He is calling him just 'Jiraiya'? With no honorifics? "And-"

"C'mon, Tsunade," Jiraiya interrupted her as he walked up to her side with one hand on the blond boy's shoulder. "There's no need to interrogate Itachi like this. I asked him to bring Naruto to me once his friends went home, that's all." A big grin appeared on his face. "On that note, meet my godson! Tsunade, this little rascal is Naruto. Naruto, this is my former teammate Tsunade. I told you about her, remember?"

"Nice to meet ya!" the boy exclaimed with a way too loud voice.

Tsunade hadn't interacted much with children since she left the village. There had simply been no reason to. After all, she spent much of her time in casinos and bars; children rarely visited these kinds of places. However, when she did interact with them, it was usually because some people recognized her even after all these years and pleaded for her to help their sick children. More often than not, her healing was completely redundant as the children in question rarely had something worse than a fever, but she could never quite bring herself to say 'no' to the worried parents. Either she let herself be talked into helping them or, in case the child in question had some kind of injury that involved blood, let Shizune handle the situation.

What she was trying to say was that the few times she interacted with children, they were usually too weak to do much more than lie in their beds. If they spoke to her at all, it was in a tired and hoarse voice.

Maybe it was the fact that being back in Konoha brought back a lot of memories she had suppressed for years now, maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it were both of these things together, but whatever it was, when she looked at the brightly grinning boy, his form was momentarily replaced by the image of Nawaki.

"So Jiraiya told you about me, huh?" she said while trying to dispel the painful image, cursing inwardly at the slight crack in her voice. Not that anyone but Jiraiya or her sensei would notice, of course, but that was already bad enough. "I hope he knew to keep his tongue in check."

The grin on the boy's face, which had no business at all looking so similar to her brother's, became even wider. "He said you're the best healer there is and the most beautiful woman in the world!" Suddenly, his face shifted into a more thoughtful expression. "Though I guess he hasn't seen you in a while either. You're a bit too old for that now, right?"

Whatever spell he had over her broke in an instant. He had said that so casual and innocently, clearly meaning every word of it and only voicing what he thought was a fact…

"Who do you think you are to call a woman old to her face?!"

Before he could react, she flicked her finger against his forehead and made him fly backwards.

Tsunade wasn't a monster, of course. Insult or not, she wouldn't actually hurt a child. Because of that, he flew only a few feet before landing on his ass with a surprised yelp, rubbing his forehead with one hand while using the other to steady himself. "What the hell, Granny? Why did you do that?!"

"I wouldn't have done that if you knew your manners, you brat! I see Jiraiya has been a bad influence on you if that's how you treat people you have just met!"

"Are you stupid? I thought Ero-sennin was lying when he said you have a temper like a devil, but looks like he was right!"

Her head swung around to glare at the white-haired man who was smart enough to instantly take a step back, knowing full well that he wasn't under the same protection as the child. "Hey, calm down, yes? It was said in good fun, that's all! No need to get angry, aye?"

Tsunade narrowed her eyes some more as she considered if it was worth it to punish Jiraiya as well, completely ignoring her sensei and the Uchiha boy who had distanced themselves from the spectacle and now watched it from further away, when she suddenly felt an incoming attack.

All it took was a casual swing of her hand to deflect the punch to her face, which she quickly followed up by another weak flick to her blond assailant's forehead that this time only made him stumble a few steps back instead of throwing him to the ground like before.

"Naruto," Jiraiya said with a slight grimace. "Maybe don't attack her, alright? She's kinda out of your league."

That would indeed be the smart thing to do. The boy wouldn't have any of it, however.

"Shut it, Ero-sennin!" He pointed a finger at her. "I'm gonna beat that witch's ass, just watch me!"

Unexpectedly, rather than making her even angrier, that proclamation actually made her laugh. "You're want to beat me? Big words for a little wimp." Although it was certainly stupid, she had to hand it to him; saying something like that when he clearly knew who she was took some guts. "But do you really think you can back them up? I'm one of the Legendary Sannin, after all, while I assume you haven't even graduated from the academy yet."

"So what? I'm gonna become the strongest ninja the village has ever seen, dattebayo! That means I can't let myself be stopped by an old bully like you!"

Something in her chest squeezed painfully at that while similar words from years past echoed in her ears, but she ignored all of that. "The strongest ninja the village has ever seen?" She snorted. "Don't be ridiculous. Do you even know what that means, or what heights you need to reach for that dream to become true? I'm sure you don't even know how strong Jiraiya is once he stops goofing around and he is your godfather, not to mention the Hokage. My grandfather and the old man" -she jerked her head in the direction of her sensei- "both are called 'God of Shinobi', did you know that? He's over sixty years old and still could beat your ass in a second straight. That's what you're aiming to surpass." Then, much quieter, she added: "Dreams are foolish, and they never come true."

Tsunade took great pleasure in seeing the doubt in the boy's eyes, only to be surprised when it vanished as fast as it appeared. "Well, if the Hokage are really so strong, all I need to do is become the strongest Hokage ever! If I do that, even you will need to acknowledge me, right?"

("Hey! I want to be like grandpa someday… I will be honoured with the name Hokage, because being Hokage is my dream!")

("For the sake of everyone's safety... Ever since my sister died, that sole thought has sustained me. Becoming the Hokage is my dream.")

She involuntarily took a step back while all energy seemed to drain out of her. Naruto, on the other hand, continued without even noticing her changed mood. "I will surpass Ero-sennin, Jii-chan, you, and even your grandfather! And once I'm the strongest, I will be able to protect everyone!"

The absolute conviction with which he said that and the complete trust in his own words; it was as if Tsunade had been thrown into the past to relieve Dan's and Nawaki's proclamation all over again. Tsunade wanted to hate the boy for that, wanted to be angry with him for reminding her of ghosts that she had tried so long to forget, but she couldn't bring herself to do so. And how could it be any other way? Wouldn't hating that boy who was so similar to the people she had lost be in a way like betraying their memory?

She couldn't stay here, so she didn't.

Just like she had done all her life, she ran.

"Ehm, did I say something wrong?"

In any other situation, Hiruzen would have found it adorable and even admirable that Naruto found it in himself to worry about a person he had just fought with. However, after watching Tsunade getting so upset, he didn't find the energy to feel anything but sadness.

"Don't worry," Jiraiya told the boy as he stepped back to his side. "You didn't. I think you just remind her of someone that died a long time ago."

"Oh," the boy said. "So, should I apologize or…"

His former student chuckled, though it sounded somewhat forced. "No, there's no need for that. In fact, what you have done might actually help her."

At least that was the plan. Hiruzen had known that confronting Tsunade with her past through Naruto would wake memories she would probably prefer not to think about, but you couldn't overcome past trauma by ignoring it. Confronting what had hurt you was the first step towards recovery.

That didn't make it any easier to watch her being in that state, of course.

"Itachi," Jiraiya said. "Would you mind accompanying Naruto home? I'm afraid I will be too busy tonight to spent time with him after all."

"Of course."

"Thanks." Jiraiya then turned towards his godson. "Listen, Naruto, I'm-"

"It's alright," the boy interrupted him. "I understand. You want to help her, right?"

It was always amazing to see how observant children could be.

"I do."

Naruto grinned. "Good. That's what friends should do."

Jiraiya nodded. "That it is."

He and Hiruzen shared one short glance before his former student vanished in a shunshin.

He sighed. No matter how much he wished to accompany the man and help him console Tsunade, Hiruzen knew that he wasn't as well suited for that task as Jiraiya. Right now, she needed a friend much more than a teacher. Furthermore, as the Hokage and therefore leader during the conflict that had costed Tsunade her loved ones, it wasn't unreasonable to think that his presence might actually be counterproductive right now. For all that she had never blamed him, people acted unreasonably and lashed out at others when they were hurt, and if there was one word that described Tsunade right now, it would be just that.

All he could do right now was to hope Jiraiya could help her.