Game Over
Sasuke's figure wavered, before disappearing like a mirage; Sasuke and his shurikens had all been illusions. The real one was in all likelihood still biding his time, watching from somewhere nearby…
"Come on, think," Sakura muttered to her inner self. "There's no way we can beat him in a straightforward fight, but there's no way we can trick a seasoned Jōnin either… So how do we do this?"
As long as they demonstrated teamwork, and as long as they didn't turn on each other, that would be enough to satisfy Kakashi, who had his own set of values regarding companions.
"We should still fight to win, shannaro!" Inner Sakura roared. "Fight and win!"
"Look, Sakura-chan!" Naruto tittered excitedly. "A bell, there, on the ground! Kakashi must have dropped it by accident!"
"Send a Shadow Clone," Sakura said absentmindedly.
The instant those words left her mouth, Kakashi flickered to the abandoned bell and picked it up, before disappearing again. So, he could hear them from his hiding place…
Sakura thought some more. Could her dog system help her in any way in this situation? She had no sword to use with her Manyuu-style Kenjutsu. She had only accumulated fire affinities from the old civilian ladies she had drained of their breasts, but she didn't know any fire-style Jutsu yet, so that was also useless.
"Naruto, can you teach me the Shadow Clone Jutsu?" Sakura turned to ask Naruto.
It couldn't be too complicated, if a dunce like Naruto could master it after reading it off the Scroll of Seals once. And luckily for her, Naruto was only too glad to be of help!
"Sure thing!" he said happily. "Cross these two fingers like this, and those two like so, and then you just… Whooo-whoooa shaboom, bam!!"
"Sha-shaboom…bam?"
Was this some sort of language that only idiots could understand? At any rate, it would be probably be fine to try it out, unless she tried to attempt the Multi Shadow Clone Jutsu. If she made too many copies with her chakra divided equally among them, the minuscule fraction she'd end up might as well equal zero, and then she'd die.
But wait! She had an emergency chakra supply in her breasts. Yeah, she'd be fine. Probably.
"Shadow Clone Jutsu!" Sakura called out, crossing her fingers together.
An anorexic clone and a fat clone appeared next to her with a puff of smoke. Not bad, for a first try…?
"No, no, no," Naruto said impatiently. "I said whoo-whoa, shaboom bam, not whoa-hoooa, dodon pow!"
"You're not making any sense, Naruto," Sakura said weakly, before turning to her thin clone. "At any rate, you go make yourself useful, go scout ahead."
"Got it," the thin Sakura said with its reedy voice.
"As for you, die," Sakura told the fat clone, and she punched it, making it disappear with a poof.
The memory of being punched immediately entered her mind, causing her to wince.
"You know you can just release the Jutsu, right?" Naruto said tentatively.
"I know," Sakura said. "I just didn't like how it looked."
However, unbeknownst to Naruto, Sakura had produced a perfect Shadow Clone, but using the smoke as cover, she had used the Transformation Jutsu on herself to make it look like she had produced a faulty clone, to fool Kakashi in case he was watching…
Except Kakashi was not watching at all, making all of Sakura's efforts to trick him completely pointless.
Instead of sticking around, Kakashi had gone off to search for Sasuke, dissatisfied at his inaction. This entire time, Sasuke had been waiting for an opening for a sure-kill strike, but since no opportunities had presented themselves, he had remained hidden. That is, until Kakashi had finally found him and attacked.
The two had a short duel, with Sasuke demonstrating his Great Fireball Jutsu. Unfortunately for him, fire style was cursed to never kill; not only did his fireball completely miss, the bright flames obscured his vision, allowing Kakashi to sneak up from under him and drag him underground up to the neck…
…And that is where the real Sakura found him, a few minutes later.
"Pfft!"
Sakura had to pinch herself hard to keep herself from laughing; Sasuke was still trying very hard to look aloof and dignified, even though he looked very much like a daikon with only his head poking out of the ground.
"Are you going to gawk at me all day, or are you going to help me out?" Sasuke grumbled.
"Sure, but you'll owe me."
"Never mind, then; I'll do it myself..."
Sasuke had seen the way girls looked at him, so he wasn't about to promise anything to one. He wriggled with all his might, but after a minute, he had only managed to liberate one of his shoulders. He was well and truly stuck for the foreseeable future.
"Hey, what're you—"
As much as Sakura enjoyed watching him struggle, she needed his help to complete the test. If Naruto and Sasuke wouldn't work together, then she might as well become the oil that greased their gears, in order to make them cooperate. Or she could be the glue that stuck the team together.
Or she could be some other liquid-based analogy.
Sakura grabbed Sasuke by the armpits and yanked him out; she was much stronger than she looked. Once freed, Sasuke touched the back of his head absentmindedly. That divine softness… he had nearly forgotten about his vow of taking revenge. He shook his head; he mustn't ever forget about avenging his clan…
Breasts are temporary, killing Itachi is forever.
"Time's almost up," he said gruffly, turning around so that she couldn't see him blushing ever so slightly. "We should go."
Their shadows had nearly disappeared; the sun was right over their heads, which meant it was nearly noon. They'd be hearing Kakashi's alarm very soon, so the pair completely gave up on stealth, focusing on covering as much ground as possible in order to find their sensei before it was too late.
But for some reason, Kakashi seemed to have completely disappeared. No matter how far and wide they searched for him, they simply could not find him. Sakura was beginning to think Kakashi had lost interest in training his sensei's son; she certainly would have, if she was in his place.
And so, at noon sharp, they ran out the timer, and the alarm rang. Game over…