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My teenage high school romance comedy can't be this perverted!

A oreigaru or snafu/DxD crossover featuring our infamous loner Hikigaya Hachiman who for unknown reasons was suddenly ripped from his reality and dropped into this foreign world filled with danger in every corner. And he needs to find a a way to deal with his new overly attached and attention-seeking 'friends'. I primarily focus on fanfiction.net, when a new chapter gets released or I have some important news, I'll most likely post it there first. I'll try to make things work here as well. Also don't forget to review and stuff, I want to know your thoughts on my story! And all chapters are between 2k - 4k words.

NimtheWriter · Anime & Comics
Not enough ratings
92 Chs

Chapter 27: Unfair reality

Beta read by n1ch, Shigiya and Solitary heart

--Hikigaya POV-

The sensation of flying will always give me that special feeling in my heart. This sensation of being free from any worries, as all of my problems, is just nothing but small dust in the wind. During every full moon, I would spend a few hours above the clouds just staring at the sky and enjoying my alone time.

"You'll pay for this, you worthless trash!"

I don't understand why Rias and the others didn't take advantage of their wings. I remembered asking her about it and she just told me that there was nothing special about it.

Maybe it's a matter of perspective?

"I'll kill you, you bastard!"

Sometimes, I wondered how the mentality of the supernatural beings worked. Maybe it's because they were born with the ability to fly, so they no longer saw the beauty of gazing at the night sky while thousands of feet in the air.

"H-hey, where are you touching me with those tentacles, you pervert!"

Oops, gotta be careful, these things have a mind of their own when I'm not paying attention.

"Let. Me. Go!"

Just like my friend here, Raynare didn't appreciate the natural scene of the Moon and stars so close by. She kept bitching around for the last ten minutes.

You know, one would expect her to be more grateful when I healed her up instead of leaving her injured all the way. Yet here she is still threatening to end my life. Not to mention her attitude was slowly getting on my nerves, 'I'm really tempted to let my tentacles have their way with her.' Of course, I'm not a depraved pervert, so I wouldn't do that.

"Just shut up, we're here already." As I began my descent, the sight of my house came into view. Akeno was there in the garden waving at me with a smile on her face. I returned a smile as well, it feels weird now that we were officially a couple. Which didn't change much honestly, she behaved the same as before it became official.

"Welcome home, Hachiman." Her arms came to me for a hug, I tossed Raynare aside to hug her as well. Akeno gave me a small peck on the lips, "Would you like to have dinner? A Bath? Or…me~"

Critical hit!

Who knew some anime words would carry so much power in real life? I always thought I would be weirded out if someone told me that, but no I just felt happy and embarrassed at the same time. "Sorry I couldn't complete the preparations for our date today, but I brought someone."

I showed her Raynare, who tried to escape, only to have one of my tentacles locked around her body in a shibari style. "Motherfu-Puh!" Just to make things easier, I knocked her unconscious. 'Why didn't I do that in the first place?'

Akeno, being herself, looked at the scene with a blushing face. "Ara ara, Hachiman, that side of yours is so exciting to witness. Fufufu, I can't wait for my turn~"

With Raynare now no longer a nuisance, I brought her inside the house and rested her in the basement training area, to keep her away from mom and dad by chaining her to the wall. Unlike me, those two are regular humans, and this Fallen won't hesitate a second to kill them.

"I'll leave her to you, Akeno-chan. She just appeared today trying to kill Hyoudou Issei. I want to know why she did it and on whose orders."

"Don't worry, leave everything to me. It's been so long since I had Fallen to play with~." Akeno said, her smile turning from flirty to sadistic in an instant, but the blush was still on her face.

I almost, kinda feel bad for Raynare.

Now, what was I forgetting?

.

.

.

Oh right, Issei.

"Akeno-chan, take care of Raynare here while I'm out, I need to go pick up the unfortunate boy who went on a date with her." I didn't wait for a reply as I stepped outside, making my way to Kuoh Academy, and wondering how the pervert is doing.

"I'm sure he's fine, '' I told myself, I did ask Koneko to make sure he didn't drown.

Down below, Akeno watched as her handsome dragon flew away, she stared directly out towards the trail of light that fired into the sky from the window. That person couldn't help but draw trouble at himself, like a moth to the flame. '*Sigh* that's just his nature.'

For the Fallen, Akeno didn't recognise her but she knew her way around her own kind. She could feel the sadism inside her, getting more excited by the second at the image of breaking her. "Now little crow, let's have some fun, shall we? Maybe Hachiman might like having a new pet, Fufufu~"

Shuri gifted her daughter the secret stash of toys she had hidden away in the basement of the shrine.

Raynare never felt this amount of danger from anyone, even Kokabiel didn't give her this much goosebumps.

-Kuoh Academy-

Guess I arrived just in time.

I saw him exit the gates, as expected of Koneko-chan, she didn't let me down and Issei was still alive and not drowning.

Such a caring soul.

"Achoo!"

The lone Issei was walking out of the school, huddled in a wet towel that did little to help him from the cold. Being soaking wet with his uniform on already gave me an uncomfortable feeling, and it was freezing today, poor kid

"I-I n-need t-to f-find Yuu-Yuuma-chan." Even his voice was stuttering from the biting cold.

"How has his day gone so wrong? I woke up this morning expecting a wonderful date, followed by my first kiss and finally becoming a man! I would have woken up tomorrow with a hot naked babe by my side!" He screamed in the air.

Wow was he desperate, my wings twitched from the embarrassment I felt in his place.

"But nooooooo~."

"Everything had to freaking take a turn for the worst as Yuuma-chan suddenly transformed into an older, sexier BDSM version of herself and suddenly wanted to kill me! Did I mess up the date so bad that it warrants an execution!? Didn't people say the worst thing that can do is say no?! Maybe it was those stupid quotes I kept using the whole time, or maybe it might have been the gifts I bought her weren't that good."

I wondered why I kept listening to his rants, but gifts? Hmmm, I remember Raynare wearing a bracelet band around her wrist. I don't doubt that she would have either thrown it away or kept it as a sick twisted sense of memorabilia.

"Achoo!"

Shit, he might catch a cold tomorrow if he doesn't get out of those wet clothes. I could probably invite him back to my house.

"Then just like in those magical girls anime, that handsome senpai came out to save me. The famous president of the Service Club, the dark prince of Kuoh, the helping hand of God as some would call him, or the famous "Phantom Eyed Helper"!"

Hurgh, every word that came out of his mouth made me cringe so hard! I hated those nicknames! Why in the name of everything that is sacred would teenagers waste time on giving others such embarrassing titles!?

The dark prince of Kuoh?

I nearly broke down crying just from that.

And since when did this Phantom Eyed Helper come in!? Every day it's just another form of pain for me.

"Yuuma-chan got hurt, and I...I...have to save her. Maybe this was all just a big misunderstanding, she couldn't be an evil person. Right?"

Sorry to say it bud, she sure is evil.

"Achoo! This day sucks."

Okay, enough hiding like a stalker, time to make my appearance for the second time in the day.

"It sure does," I said as I landed near a light post, hidden from view.

That certainly surprised Issei as he turned around to face me. I enjoyed his shocked look, to be honest, I might do more of these cool entrances.

"You seem a bit cold there, Hyoudou." I said as I used my phone to text Kalawarna about the situation, not paying any attention to the shivering boy walking next to me, "Follow me, I'll fix you up something to dry yourself with."

He came along without uttering a word, he most definitely held a lot of questions about what was going on. I gave him time to compose himself, "Is...Is Yuuma-chan okay?" He asked.

I stopped for a bit before giving him a sideways glance, "You know she tried to spear you in the stomach, right? Like kill you on your first ever date, so why are you worrying about her?" I was genuinely curious.

"I...I just need to know, please!" He begged, pleading for an answer.

"Well, She's not bleeding anymore…" I said a bit awkwardly as Issei just stared at me, not wanting to tell him that I'm basically having her tortured.

There was a brief silence between us after that statement, like an invisible tension growing in the background. "Listen, Hyoudou, there are some things in the world that don't seem exactly what they are supposed to. People are not truly transparent with their real intentions or personality. In most cases they disguise themselves with a sort of mask, claiming to be people they are not, living a life that doesn't suit them for a short term small benefit or for their own gain."

I showed him the picture of him and Yuuma-chan during their date this morning, eating the parfait that I secretly ate as well. "How did you…"

"The one called Amano Yuuma was such an individual, a liar, a manipulator and an actor. She is not the girl you have visualised in your heart, don't blind yourself with lies by trying to claim her innocence in this whole incident." I didn't hold back with my words.

"You...you don't know what you're talking about! Yuuma-chan isn't such a person!" Issei screamed in denial. He refused to accept such a preposterous thing, probably thinking that she was just an innocent angel!

"Denial is a logical response for anyone going through such a thing, I guess. Apparently, you never had a girlfriend in your life, so, understandably, you're holding onto the persona of Amano Yuuma for she represents what you always desired. But reality is cruel, you don't always get what you want and even if you do, there are always hidden intentions behind each action, different meanings behind each act. It just so happened that you were unfortunate enough to be targeted by someone's malicious plot." I patiently explained to the boy. I suspected it wouldn't be easy to convince him of the true nature of Raynare, but I had to try at least.

"And so what! Maybe Yuuma-chan is a victim as well, huh? Who are you to judge who is evil or good? Stop it with that acting, trying to look cool when you are not!" Issei exploded in anger.

"Take out your anger on me as much as you want, still don't forget I saved your ass today. Like it or not that girl doesn't like you, never will like you, your existence means nothing to her, in her eyes you are only nothing more than her next kill." I was being harsh, I knew it but what other way could I make this idiot understand?

"Wa-wait! Maybe, I can make it up with her! Another date...yeah! Another date to show her that I'm worthy, that I can be something more!" He bargained, trying to repair where there was nothing he could. Chasing after a pointless dream. I could see that, it was clear that Issei understood it as well, but just refused to acknowledge it.

I didn't give the boy another speech, my silence already giving Issei an answer.

"Why…why me?" Issei's voice went down a couple of octaves, no longer having that cheery personality behind it. I didn't pity him one bit, he should have known to never trust a random stranger who suddenly asks you for a date out of nowhere, especially with his reputation.

Those kinds of people are more prone to backstab you at any moment. They are scum, cowards, liars and hypocrites...just like her.

-Hikigaya Household-

"Woooooow! This is your house!? It's like a freaking castle in the middle of the neighbourhood! You must be loaded!"

I cringed at Issei's loud reaction. I was grateful for Rias's gift, but I hated when people assumed that I was a rich bocchan. Not like I was poor in my last life or something, my family was comfortably in the upper-middle class, the difference was they had to work for it to keep it that way.

"I'm home!...again."

My mom came and greeted me just like she has always done, her hands holding a whisk while wearing an apron. "Hachiman, you're late today." She didn't ask but I knew her tone when she demanded an explanation.

"I had some club affairs to take care of, Aika got a bit too overwhelmed with the recent amount of requests so I decided to help her as well. I am the club's president after all." This technically wasn't a lie, Aika really did ask me for help. The club was again increasing in popularity and soon, just two people handling the affairs won't be enough. 'I need a third member.'

"Oh, Aika-chan, that sweet little girl, it's been a while since she has come for a visit. Invite her the next you see her, okay Hachiman?" She said sternly, still whisking the bowl.

Sweet girl? Just what black magic did she use on you to fool your senses to such a degree? I would put her perverted nature right above even someone the likes of the Trio! But unfortunately, she was the most suitable member due to her highly analytical eye, which could see other details aside from the size of a male's junk.

Maybe she has a perverted Mystic eye?

And also because she did want to help out, unlike others who either join the club out of self-interest, to play around, or just because they wanted to become one of the popular kids. Aika never had much interest, she didn't even care about her image, I could relate to her to some extent.

Though I wish she would stop teasing me or getting in my personal space or showing me her BL collection.

I wish that she would stop showing me her BL Collection.

"Oh, what is this? You brought another friend!?" Why must you look so surprised with Issei being here? Didn't every devil in the city always stop by here? Not to mention that you had two beautiful girls living here and a hostage who was being looked after by Akeno. And then there's Aika when she invites herself over to play some games. So that is 4 girls in total.

Maybe I should invite Kiba over to calm my mom down? I heard from Rias that he's good around older women. Though he better keep his hands to himself or else I might have to talk with him.

"Yeah mom, this is Hyoudou Issei, he uh...fell into the nearby river, so I invited him here to get changed." Can't really say that I saved him from nearly getting murdered after all. She might ground me for life.

Issei, being a bit caught off guard, decided to play along with me, " A-ano, goo-good evening, Mrs. Hikigaya-san. Thank you for having me and sorry for the trouble."

"Oh please, I don't mind at all. Come in! Come in, make yourself cozy, I'll make some snacks for you boys while you get cleaned up!" Mom was a good host, now that she and dad no longer had the pressure of their day-to-day jobs resting on their shoulders, they now became a constant presence around the house and more inviting to outsiders. Dad regularly went on fishing trips with his friends and mom always brought her inner circle to the mall. Sometimes I would have the unfortunate karma of being forced to join and play the role of their bag carrier, even Akeno joined the fun with mom as well.

Dad was less of a hassle, fishing would have been relaxing if I kept catching actual fishes than snakes! Don't believe me? Just last month we were banned from one of the fishing locations because the locals thought we sneaked in snakes to release them in the river. I had to resort to asking Rias to use her devil hypnosis power to fix this situation. As you can guess, after that incident I quit fishing.

Back to the present, I invited Issei to my room so we could discuss things. The boy couldn't stop marvelling at everything in my house, muttering things like, "Wow, rich people are awesome", "Is that real gold?", "You got a freaking pool table!?", and so on.

I wonder how Rias ignored these reactions when she received guests who acted in such a way. 'But then again, she has a shower in the middle of her clubroom. Compared to that, this might be nothing.'

After we reached my room which further shocked Issei as the inside was big enough to be an entire apartment floor on its own, he sat down on the sofa admiring its texture lost in his fantasy world, while I threw him a towel. The idiot is soaking my carpet. "Oi, get yourself together man, we should start talking about what happened and dry yourself off already."

That brought him back to earth, and he grabbed the towel "Oh yeah…just...just what is going on? One moment I'm having a wonderful date with Yuuma-chan and the next moment she has wings, tells me to die for having a….a sacred...tear?"

"Sacred gear."

"Yeah, sacred gear, whatever that is…" You're about to have your mind blown then, "She gets injured, you appear like magic then throw me in a pool! You still haven't told me what happened to her!" Even after everything I told him about her true nature he still insisted on meeting her.

Damn…

"She is still alive, probably regretting it but alive nonetheless." Especially with Akeno, god only knows what she is doing to her. "I will get to the point right away. I'm part dragon but mostly human."

Well, no one ever said I wasn't a man that got straight to the point.

"Your expression says that you don't believe what I am saying. Well, that can't be helped. You did see Yuuma's black wings, didn't you?"

He nodded his head at my question.

I wouldn't be surprised if he thought everything until now like a dream, but all of this was indeed reality.

"That's a Fallen Angel. They are former Angels who once served God, but they are beings who have fallen from heaven because they had sinned. They used to be enemies with the devils, at least most of them are cool with devils, there are still some stubborn warmongers among them who wants to kill them all."

From his perspective the more I talked about Fallen angels, the more fantasy-like this whole ordeal seemed.

"The Devils had been at war with the Fallen Angels since ancient times. They fought over the possession of the Underworld, which is also known as Hell in the human world. The Underworld is split into two areas, one for Devils and one for Fallen Angels. The Devils form pacts with humans and receive their sacrifices and increase their strength. Some Fallen Angels on the other hand control humans to eliminate Devils, of course not so much now. At this point, the Angels come in to destroy these two races on God's orders, which creates the three forces. This has been going on since ancient times."

I made my point quite clear, Amano Yuuma was a Fallen not a human.

"…If you are joking around, then can you please stop now? I don't want to talk about this. Just w-why did she try to kill me!? Over whatever this bullshit sacred gear is!?"

He was going hysterical, a good thing my room is soundproof.

"Calm down, Ise. It couldn't be helped…No, you were just unlucky or lucky to be born as a possessor…"

"What do you mean possessor?"

"Strap in kid, cause this is going to be a long story."

-Issei POV-

-Sorry. You were a threat to us, so we decided to get rid of you early. If you want to hold a grudge, then hate the God who put the Sacred Gear inside you.-

That's what Yuuma-chan said at that time when she was about to kill him.

So there's a Sacred Gear inside his body?

"Sacred Gear is an irregular power that is bestowed to certain humans. For example, most of the people whose names are recorded in history are said to be possessors of a Sacred Gear. They used the power of their Sacred Gear to record their name in history." Hikigaya-senpai explained the details of the power that he possessed.

To his surprise and shock, another person suddenly came in and continued explaining on Hachiman-senpai's part. "Presently, there are people who possess Sacred Gears within their bodies. You know those people who play an important role in human history? Most of the time, those people possess Sacred Gear."

Black hair in a ponytail! The ponytail, which is said to be nearly extinct! The person who is said to be the last person with a ponytail at his school!

That pretty face, which is always smiling! The person with a Japanese atmosphere! The one who is called Yamato Nadeshiko even though she is a student, and also one of our school idols, Himejima Akeno-senpai!

One of the two great onee-sans!!

'What the fuck is she doing here!?' Thousands of thoughts ran through his brain, but one stood out the most.

'Wasn't there a rumour about Himejima-senpai having a boyfriend? Don't tell me…"

"Most of the Sacred Gears have functions that are only usable in human society. But there are exceptional Sacred Gears that are a threat to us, the Devils, and Fallen Angels." She finished her part and did the most unthinkable thing ever, something he had only fantasised about in his dreams.

They both kissed!!!

'Damn you Hachiman, I knew you were bad news!!!'

"I managed to gather some interesting info from little crow-chan~"

Ahh, even her voice was so soothing, but then she had to twist his heart even further by sitting on that bastard lap! He was for sure feeling those Heavenly oppais press on his chest! Damn it!!!

Now only the beautiful redhead, a foreigner from Germany, Rias Gremory still remained free. If he played my cards right maybe he could catch her attention!

But reality had to play a sick joke on him and shatter his dreams.

"Hey Hachiman, I heard you had a guest?" Another voice feminine voice came behind him and as Issei turned his sight towards it, the world around him broke into pieces.

Ri-Rias, Rias Gremory-senpai...is here….as well?

That iconic crimson hair, that impressive body which made the usage of porn material useless for most boys in Kuoh Academy. Those huge oppais that threatened to burst out of her uniform, paired with her smooth pale skin made her look like a goddess.

"Make some space, you two! Don't act all fluffy so soon in the day, humphf!"

That goddess that he dreamed about every night, who he had a picture of in his phone, was pushing herself in between Himejima-senpai and Hikigaya-senpai with a clearly visible pout on her face, trying to get in between them. The bastard had the gall to try and get them off of him, as they vied for his attention.

Was it jealousy?

What is life?

Who is he?

Is Hikigaya Hachiman a God?

Can he make me his apprentice?

"Hey Hyoudou, I'll fill you in more later on, it's time for you to go home." Said that fucking playboy, stealing all the best girls, acting all cool, stupid, lucky fish-eyed senpai *Sniff*.

'I hate this guy so much!'

Please teach me, Senpai!

Queue, another black circle which appeared below him as he for the second time in the day fell through the floor.

Not again!

"Wait! I can just wa-!"

-Hachiman-

"Why did you teleport him away?" Rias asked, along with Akeno looking curious as well.

Well, I couldn't just tell her that it was mostly because of her. I was planning to make him stay the night in the guest room just in case another Fallen came to kill him.

But now, with your appearance here along with Akeno which I would have managed because she is my girlfriend, the boy would have not left me in peace.

Hyoudou Issei is a known harem and breasts lover, wanting to form one of his own filled with girls like you two. He would have done something annoying like asking me to be his teacher. *Sigh*

"I had my reasons." It's times like these that I appreciated having someone like Kala, I texted her to send her own people to safeguard him and his household, I just received a reply back with her telling me she got everything under control.

"By the way Hachiman, little crow told me all her secrets, fufufu. She was quite hard to break~" Akeno said as she gave him a one-sided embrace, squishing her giant soft mounds on his arm, much to Rias's frustration. "Apparently she has friends hidden in the old church, where they planned to extract a poor girl of her sacred gear."

The last part she said with a frown on her face, her previous demeanour disappearing for a bit.

"We must not let this happen, Hachiman. Especially in my territory." Said Rias.

Yeah, she was right.

"It's time to end this."

--------

Chapter 28, 29, 30 and 31 already available in my p@treon.