Chapter 35 – Thank you, I survived

I kept telling Caleb he can go and shop with Jona but he wants me to come along to look for his favorite robot that he’s been collecting since childhood. Every time he sees one, he’ll do anything to put it on his collection and, unexpectedly, there’s one here in Manila. I wish I could just punch him so that he could go to sleep and not bother me. “Come on, man. I’ll be pissed if that shop sell it to anyone. I want that, allright?” he kept on bugging me until I am standing at this shop for him to look for that robot. I empathize with him a little, okay, a lot because I like model cars too and I’d do anything to get my hands on it.

“Jona, you think he’ll stop bugging me if the concert starts?” I asked while waiting for him. We were talking just casually when fans recognize me and the shop is surrounded by people like I can’t see the other store because of the crowd. “Ooops! busted” Caleb whispered. Jona and the mall securities are all trying to get the crowd from entering the shop. I am thankful that I am wearing my shades right now. I wave at them and told Caleb to hurry up. I look at Caleb and he was, again, flirting with the store owner. I drag him away from the owner and said sorry. I called Jona and told the security and the others that we are leaving the store. We hurriedly went to the car but stops from time to time because fans are giving me some letters and gifts. They were shouting Caleb’s name too. I fixed my hair as soon as I felt my body settles on my seat. “This is why I hate press. They don’t give me time to breath” Caleb blurted.

I fixed my ear piece and get ready to go on stage. “You ready?” a staff asked me. “Yeah!” I said and everyone got their grounds check and almost everybody is walking very fast and some are running to get to their positions. My team gathered in circle and this is the time where I say some few words and then go on stage. “It’s their time to be happy, let’s give them a very big one. Ready! One, two and three” and all hands are in the air and we fixed everything. I did some stretching and shakes my hands. I give myself a little meditation time and off I go.

“You are the rainbow that I’ve been waitin’ for

I can’t decide what should I give you in return

You are the sunshine that lights up my nightmare

I can’t beat my own fears and stand upright

You gave me a reason to drain every negativity,

Oooh….. You…..oh! oh! oh!

Thank you, I survived

(Dancing some EDM music that I created for this song)

Thank you, I survived…..

(Dancing some EDM music that I created for this song)

Appreciation doesn’t work for me

I let it everything go to waste

I make myself king, I don’t make mistakes

‘cause everybody is telling me, I don’t need anyone

I fill myself with my greatness

I was falling into the fire, started raining

Luck ain’t by my side, I am broken

Everything falls apart, I didn’t save anyone

My fame, my money, even myself

I let it go ‘cause I got you

You are the rainbow that I’ve been waitin’ for

I can’t decide what should I give you in return

You are the sunshine that lights up my nightmare

I can’t beat my own fears and stand upright

You gave me a reason to drain every negativity

(Slow instrumental music)

I lied. I’m not broken

I lied. I’m not fallin’

I lied. I’m not in reign

I lied. I’m not lonely”

I put the mic in my chest and silently listened to the scream and support of my fans. They were chanting the chorus all together and the I was surrounded by my music sang by the fans. After singing it for three times, I started to give a small peptalk. “Think about the life you have right now. All the good and bad at this point of your life. It’s easy to look at the people around you and tell them how they can correct their life. It’s easy because we’re not in their shoes. My personal experiences was shown to the public ever since I was thirteen or almost 14” fans laughed at my last remark. I continued my little speech “Want to know a secret?” I asked my fans.

Every corner was cheering me on. “Did you know that I grew up here?” fans started to gossip. “You didn’t know that part of me. You’ve seen me drunk, acting cool at a young age but you never saw the other life I was living…. it was a torture for me as a kid at that age. You all think that I live this majestic life that I get what I want but I’m just like you, I have problems. I have things to deal with on my own. We are all people living in this circle. We have similarities and differences as well. We are all unique as they say. You are the sword and the shield of your own. You can’t ask someone to fix your problems for you. You have to face the little demons you’re fighting with. You are tired? Get some help?! Look around you. There is always a help that comes your way. It may not be today! But someday you will. Just Hold on to that thought and DO the THINGS you CAN do”. I ended my speech with a thank you and I see fans crying and after I said “Thank you, I survived” all of them screamed so loud.

The lights turned off and they played the 7 minutes video for me to change and maybe drink some water. I came back to the lift and started singing and dancing. I slipped at the last minute of my sixth song and everyone was worried because I needed help to stand up. I smiled and told them “I’m fine” when I’m not really fine. I continued the song and my dance was a little out. Thankfully, the next part is a 10 minute video of thanks and some inspirational quotes that we shot inside a library and a museum. The doctors hurriedly took a look where I pointed where it hurts and luckily, it’s not serious. I continued dancing for the rest of my songs and the medical team are always ready to look if I am getting worse or not.Thankfully, I only sprained my left feet so it wasn’t that bad but at the last two songs, I had to sit because it really hurt so bad but I don’t want my fans to get worried so I acted as if everything is great. I went back to sing sitting on a chair with my guitar. “It’s okay, it ain’t that bad but they told me that I should sit this one out. allright?” they all cheered on me and I sang the last song for tonight.