Chapter 41

Nathan stared at the message from Juliette and then he felt very angry. Did she no miss me the way I missed her? What is this behaviour? Is this because of that fancy pants that lives with her? If she's not interested in him, how come she feels embarrassed to be seen with me when he's around? What the fuck does she mean by that dumb ass statement? Is she having an affair with him? Is she in love him? I cannot believe this! After everything we have been through! I knew that she liked him! I've always known that there is something fishy going on there! Because how the fuck do you explain a lady staying with a man who is not her boyfriend and being very comfortable to the point that she is embarrassed if the guy sees her with her boyfriend! No wonder she offers to come over instead. She prefers to go crazy with me in my house than hers. Come to think of it, I have asked a dozen times to co e and live with me and she has declined all these times. I should have seen the signs! Like the time he would not let me in the house when we broke up the last time, what if they had just finished having sex and she was ashamed? But Juliette is not that promiscuous, I am the promiscuous person in this relationship. She doesn't even offer to have sex, she just lets us have sex when I ask. What if it is because she is having sex somewhere else, with this roommate of hers! I should go over right now and punch his freaking teeth out of his fucking mouth! I don't fucking care that he is bigger or slightly taller than I am, I should make him pay for getting his fucking groove on with my girlfriend! Like bro, that's the live of my life! If you want a fucking woman, there are a freaking billion of them all around the fucking country. Hold up, what if that's the reason she did not want to call me to pick her up? Wait, what if she did that so that she could spend time with him in the car? She claimed that her landlord got him to stay with her but what if it's that friend of hers, Ashley- oh, she has always hated me. She did not approve of our relationship and I know very well she would tell Juliette how glorious Matt is compared to me. What if this so Ashley's way of getting rid of me and Juliette is just too nice to say anything so she basically plays by his tune and then tried to make the whole thing look like I am the crazy one? Damn! Ashley is toxic as fuck! I need to separate her from my Juliette. But how? Juliette will never get separated from Ashley, she think they're soul sisters or whatever the fuck they call themselves, it's fucking hard to keep up with their names and shit, Nathan thought.

His head was spinning around at the thoughts that came into them. He decided to get himself some drinks. He stood close to where he kept his drink and pulled out a whiskey, then he walked to his fridge to get himself some ice and then poured the whiskey in the glass and drink it slowly. He tried to calm himself down and stop himself from rushing out and going to Juliette's house and kicking ng the fucking door down and catch her ib bed with the neighbor or roommate that she claimed is just a roommate.

Did she love him? Is that what this is about? She got angry whenever he said they were together but if he said she was in love with any other guy, she would just chuckle and roll her eyes. It's true, she was in love with this Matt guy. Did they fuck on that trip? Wait, they did! They definitely did! All he wanted to do was spend time with the love of his life but she managed to ruin it because of her love interest and then told him not to call her because she was tired and wanted to sleep! More like sleep with her roommate! She didn't want him to disturb their affair and he was going to ruin it! On second thought, what if I go there and she's not even there? I mean, she knows that I will come to the house to see what she's up to so she will try to get away with him, maybe go to a hotel or something. Should I hire a private investigator to watch her? Is that going too extreme? Because I am ready to pay for her to be watched! I don't care if she finds out, I don't care if she gets mad at me and doesn't want to see me ever again. All I know is that I will and I can do it and she would not do or say anything that I have not heard her say before. Does she even care about me? Or how this will make me feel? Does she think if anyone other than herself? Does she really care? Damnit! Does she fucking know how much I love her? No, she does not! All she thinks about is that stupid Matt's penis! That's all that she thinks about. It controls her! I could kill him! I could just kill that man and end this torture. I know that I have done some terrible stuff in the past- okay, and maybe present, like there's literally someone carrying a child for me, that's not the point. The point is, -I don't deserve this kind of treatment from her because I love her and she knows that I love her. When I'm with her, I feel very safe and I don't want that safe space to be taken away by some dweeb who doesn't even know what we have had to go through together. Someone who does not even know that we're more than boyfriend and girlfriend. Juliette is my freaking soulmate! He thought.

He began to feel whoozy, so he looked at the bottle of whiskey and realized he had downed the entire bottle. He tried to stand up but he began to stagger.

That's not good. I should get to my bed before I fall down but how do I do that. My head feels like it's about to explode. He thought, but he managed to stagger till he finally ended up on the floor, then he began to crawl.

Thank God, nobody can see me like this, it would be embarrassing, he thought and started laughing when he crawled past a mirror and caught his reflection in the mirror. He just laid down there after laughing for a while and then the looked around and everything was spinning. He suddenly felt like peeing so he crawled to his bathroom to take a leak. It was a very messy experience for him but he kept thanking God nobody could see him like this. He fell into his bathtub afterwards and just relaxed in there with his clothes. The tub with sparkling clean, he had not used it in months and the cleaning lady always cleaned it.

Leighton got into her house and the smell of the house made her feel sick immediately. It was a very familiar smell. In fact, it was the smell of one of her candles that she left to burn when she was about travelling because she hated coming back to the smell of dust or the weird smell that came in with a house that has been left unoccupied for a while. Immediately the smell got into her nose, She ran into the bathroom and threw up for some time. She did not stop throwing up for what seemed like thrity minutes. After a while, she decided to open her windows and just try to get the weird smell out of her home. She held her breathe and opened her windows and doors and sat on her balcony for while, then she went back in and started burning some new candles. Then she took out a bottle of wine but remembered that she could not drink because she was pregnant.

Fuck! She thought and then grabbed a bottle of water instead. She walked to her patio and sat down there for a while, allowing her mind to drift to random things and that's when she remembered the way Ashley had treated her.

What exactly did I say or do that was so bad? She literally started behaving strange immediately I asked Skye about her school, was I not supposed to ask? Did I say something that I was not supposed to talk about? I actually struck a nerve by my question because things literally changed after I asked that question. Maybe I should just talk to Juliette and kinda find out why her friend changed to get a perspective of the kind of person she was. Wait, what if she's bipolar? Is it possible? I doubt it though, if she was bipolar, I don't think Juliette would be friends with her. Juliette seems like the kind of person who would not be friends with a problematic person. Speaking of which, should I send her a text about the school thing or should I just chill and maybe wait till she brings it up? Speaking of school, I need to talk to my mum. I have not t seen her in a while and she has left me a couple of voicemails that I promised I was going to reach back to her. I really have this issue with remembering the littlest thing. I don't even know what I spend the vast majority of my time doing. It's not work because I literally have an assistant, a hot assistant but that's not the point. Although, I should be thinking of that now w, Matt is literally a gentleman. Like everything he has said or done throughout the trip has made me realize that I judged him way before I even knew who he was. Like, I could have missed out on that because I wanted to control him. He is a blessing. He's so wlsweet that I told him about my pregnancy before even telling my mum. Technically, I told him and Juliette, but still, I should have waited till I told my mum. But, it was the baby that bonded all of us so that's kind of a good thing. I wonder what the sex of this child would be. I want it to be a girl, that way,I could teach her everything I know, and she would not be like her father. Her uncaring father who would rather be with another woman who was giving birth than bring her mummy from the airport. But, on second thought, he is being a sweet gentleman to her. This shows that he cares about kids and that's encouraging considering that I am about to bring one into this would for him. But what if it's a boy? Then what? He'll look like his dad. He will have his father's temper.

Can I deal with another human being with Nathan's attitude? Damn! That is going to be alot for me, I'm not even joking. Like what if he is also as hotheaded or even worse, than his father? Oh my! I definitely want a girl. I think she will be just like me and I can handle a mini me, at least I know what to expect at each age or level in her life. She thought.

Then she looked into the house to see how far the candle has burnt and then she noticed that it had not really gone anywhere.

Should I call Nathan? I suddenly miss him. But, what if he's still at the hospital trying to calm his friend? Speaking of friends, why has he not introduced me to any of them. Like since I knew him, he has never introduced me to any of his friends. I know I've never asked but atleast, he could have just told me of one of them or atleast invited me to lunch with them. Which brings me to the fact that I don't even know the family of the man I'm about to have a child for. Like, I don't know my child's grandparents. What are they like? Who are they? Will they like me? I mean, I'm not in the same religion but will they welcome me? Fuck! I cannot believe I did not ask all these questions before throwing my legs up in the air and getting pregnant- my legs were in not in the air but still, I should have asked him. Can I ask him now? Will he get upset of I do? It's my right and the kid's right, right? Wait a minute, what if he has never introduced me to anyone because he has another family? What the fuck did I just get myself into? I just allowed myself to be fucked and pregnant by a man whose last name I don't know. Wait, what then do we talk about? Really? Do we only have sex all day everyday? Do we ever talk about anything really worth talking about? Why do I feel like I have been used and cheated on? It doesn't matter, right now it looks like he doesn't want the child, or maybe he does. If he does, then that's a wonderful thing but if he doesn't, I don't know what I will do. I might raise the child myself but it would have been very nice to have a companion or like a parent. I grew up with two parents and it would have been awesome for my daughter to experience that. Is it too much to wish that the father of my child would love me enough to marry me? I mean, if Nathan decides to marry me, I will marry him. Ain't that the goal? I wanna get hitched, I deserve it and it should happen but what if he does not want the same thing. I can't even think about that right now. I will enjoy and appreciate the attention that I'm getting now, it could last for as long as it wants to but that's it, I'm not going to try to make him pick me or marry me just because we have a child together. I mean, what kind of example will I be setting for my child. She will look up to me, I must make sure that I teach her the things she should know and follow. What will I call her? What name should I call her? Maybe Dream? That's a lovely name, plus she is a dream come true for me. She will make me a mother and I didn't even have to try to get her. She thought.

Then she looked at her stomach and said, "I love you Dream, I can't wait to show you the world. Glad we'll both be in it. Mummy will no longer have to paddle through life alone, I can't wait till you arrive."

She checked and saw that the candle had burnt some more because now, she could perceive the nice scent coming from it. She went back into the house to unpack her luggage but that was impossible because immediately she changed her sheets and sat on her bed, she felt like lying on it and in five minutes, she was fast asleep.