ALONE TIME . . . THAT WAS
ALL I NEEDED
It's been three weeks, and I had managed to go out alone with Piyush only once. The entire group travelled together on weekends, as well as any weekday outings where girls of our team was mostly busy shopping, clicking pictures or having a gala time with the team members. Piyush and Pihu used to take a stroll together every evening though. And that didn't work well for me.
Why was I so insecure? Why couldn't I let him be with his female friends? To be honest, I do not, till today, believe that Pihu wanted to be 'only friends ' with him. I felt like this every time I saw them together and whenever our eyes met. Not mine and Piyush's, I am talking about my eyes meeting with Pihu's eyes when we were around Piyush. She gave me the looks that one only gives to one's enemy ---a rival. I kind of liked the fact that she considered me a competitor; it was a great achievement for a girl like me, who, at one stage, could not even be considered an acquaintance of a boy like Piyush.
Also, from Piyush's point of view, I now understand how important his friends were for him. But back then, a small sense of insecurity crept up on me and irritated me until I saw them coming back from their leisurely walk, from my balcony (discreetly of course). I was happy to be spending my beaks at work with him, but I wanted to know exactly what he felt about me before we headed back to India. Rajbir and I spoke about him sometimes, and he always encouraged me to talk to him as much as I could.
I love the sight of the rising sun and my love for the view doesn't fade even during peak summers when some people cannot even bear to hear the word Sun. In Melbourne I woke up at three and went out to catch the morning sun once. The high-rise buildings were crowding the sky. Making it impossible for anyone to get a glimpse of the sun in the most beautiful hours of the day. So I took an Uber to Mt. Ridley Road, an open space with nothing but nature. It was quite far from the city, but from what I had overhead from a colleague at work, 'It has the power to take your breath away '. It presented a contrast of low hills and valleys on one side and sky-high buildings on the other.
'Why are you up at such an ungodly hour in the morning?' My Uber driver asked me jokingly as we neared my destination.
'I need some fresh air, and some time just for myself,' I told him 'and some time to think,' I thought.
We bid each other goodbye after an hour-long journey, and there I stood, all alone at a point from where the dim city lights were visible on my right, and the beautiful bronze sky was right in front of me. I saw the sunrise colour the dark sky in bright shades. It was a mesmerizing beautiful sight. I just stood there marvelling at the beauty presented before me. Nothing remained ----just nature and I . Suddenly the alarm on my phone beeped and bought me out of my thoughts or the absence of my thoughts ---It was six thirty. I had been sitting there for almost two and a half hours! Not thinking about anything, in particular, just admiring nature but the beep reminded me that it was time to go back to my world. I closed my eyes to freeze the moment in my memories.
On my way back, I wished that someday, just someday I would come back there with Piyush and I would sit holding hands at the Sun would rise up in the sky to witness our love.
On Friday, I walked into the office looking for an opportunity to ask him out, alone. During the lunch break, I found it difficult to eat the bland pasta. Piyush and I had taken the same pasta from the cafeteria, and looking at him relishing his food made me question my taste buds. 'So . . . do you have . . . ahem. . . any plans for the evening?' I finally asked him, clearing my throat. I started toying with my food. That was all I could do with it----swirl it around the fork and pretended to be interested in it.
'No,' he replied carelessly, and smiled, stuffing his face with a forkful of salad. Over the weeks I had realized that it was easy for him to laugh and smile, but his smiles rarely reached his eyes, unlike during our college days. Probably because of his parents' divorce, I found myself thinking every time I saw him fail to smile like he used to. As Piyush lifted his eyes from his plate to meet mine, I feel in love with him all over again, this time more hopelessly than ever because he looked at me as if he could read my thoughts---which was scary as hell but fascinating at the same time. I was getting caught in his web and drowning farther in his love, an inch farther every passing minute.
'Do you want to take a walk?' he asked me, and I became sure that somehow, he could indeed read my mind. I need to think before I think in his presence, I made a note in my head.
'We could walk up to the Yarra after work,' he recommended.
'I would love to,' I squeaked, and finally started eating my food. Nothing is blad or tasteless if there is happiness and hope in your heart, I realized.
I was so happy to know that my love wanted to spend some time with me. I was so overjoyed to know that.
After the lunch we went back to work, I had so much work to do, Rajbir had given me the file to complete it on time.