31 January 2023

We go back and forth constantly.

Like a small boat riveting against an unsteady river. There's no storms- it's between land and sea. Stagnant and then into the muddy waters. Then stagnant again.

What were we doing?

We never really fight.

We just stop talking. A day at the most and even then we never really stop completely. When we do talk it's for hours on end. Hours upon hours. Passing by the blink of an eye.

We've accepted our fate, right?

At least I have.

I'll let you go. It'll be painful and leave me in shreds but I will and I do, but you keep swimming right back.

You say it's a pull.

I say I understand, but it's impossible.

I feel it too.

But I shouldn't and neither should you.

You want very little.

I want it all. Everything.

So I find it upsetting that you're so okay with settling because I would never. I could never.

That's why I have to let go.