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My Consort Has Gone Mad!

Before entering the body of Imperial Consort Pan Yu Mei, Ju Ming only remembered three things from her old life; how to make sleeping pills, love pills and fragrant pouches. Her once carefree life roaming the city came to an end. Died by accident, now stuck in the body of the unfavored consort. Ju Ming strives to live to the fullest. A woman who cared more about food than her husband. Not paying him any attention will only attract his attention. What happens when a carefree and simple girl meets the handsome but cold prince. *First time attempt at light, fluffy and slightly humorous* Picture taken from: https://www.pinterest.se/pin/339740365620600461/

Lotuspalm · History
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135 Chs

Stealing But At What Cost?

An up to no good Yu Mei was already dressed in her thieving black suit. Chu'mei on the other hand was biting her nails nervously. Just thinking about how dangerous this was, she was scared for her lady. Just as Yu Mei was about to walk out, Chu'mei held onto her sleeve desperately. "Xiaojie, are you sure I can't come with you?" a pitiful Chu'mei asked with her adorable puppy eyes.

"Aiya. I wish you could come too but you have to block the door for me. That is also a very important job only you can handle. If anyone tries to find me, make sure to tell them I am asleep and to not be bothered."

"Okay," a flustered little Chu'mei replied back.

It didn't take long for Yu Mei to arrive at Pei Nan's palace. The strange thing was that there weren't many guards in place tonight. This made it easy for Yu Mei to sneak inside. Yu Mei arrived next to Pei Nan's room. This was the first time she had come this far into his palace. The only place she knew was his studies. If it wasn't for Chu'mei's detailed direction on how to get into his main bedroom, she wouldn't have found it so easily. She quickly hid behind a wall when she heard two maids coming. Her heart was racing like crazy. This was probably one of the craziest things she has ever done.

Once the two maids left, Yu Mei found the window leading to his room and climbed in. Who knew when Yu Mei was about to jump down, she would lose her footing and make a grand tumbling entrance. "Aiya!" she crunched into a ball and rubbed her foot. Even her muscles were nervous for her. That was probably the first sign for her to turn back.

When her attention was diverted back to the room, she was left speechless. His bedroom was the size of a small house. It was so grand she couldn't believe such a place existed. His room or at least what she could see had a wide and spacious hallway that was split into three parts by wide red curtains. Every time she lifted the curtain to the next hallway, the more beautiful the paintings and antiques became. Each seperated hallway that looked as if they could be their own rooms had tables and chairs on each side.

After opening three curtains, she expected to find another hallway. She excitedly opened the curtain and just as she was about to take a step forward, a large dragon pool was in front of her. "Whoa…whoaaa…." Yu Mei would have fallen into the pool if it wasn't for her good balance. She pat her chest a few times after she regained her balance. [Who puts a pool right here! Are they crazy? So psychotic!] After letting out her anger, she took a right and continued on the small pathway.

*Curtain opens* A very plain bedroom was presented in front of her. She never thought that his room would be so normal. A large bed centered at the wall, a work desk and chair on the right and three wooden cabinets on the right where a large window was placed. Nothing fancy about his room. Yu Mei was expecting a room covered in gold, paintings and huge porcelain vases but who knew this was his type. She casually walked over to the window. What she saw amazed her. His window was in a perfect position. On the ground was the flower garden and far beyond the palace, the view of the mountain could be seen. She wanted this room. Truly wanted it. *slap* *slap* "Snap out of it Yu Mei. You are here to find your precious jade." Yu Mei shook her head and started to earnestly look.

A few minutes later, the first drawer on the left was searched. Nothing but books. After searching all three of the drawers, she ran over to his study desk. [There you are my little precious] Yu Mei picked up the jade from the desk. She felt it was strange. Why would it be lying right in the open like this? She didn't care. As long as she found what she was looking for, nothing else mattered. The jade was nicely placed inside her pocket. Time to leave!

With a content heart, Yu Mei made a turn towards the exit. She opened the first curtain, taking a few steps forward. Thankfully there was walking space on the side she was standing on. unlike the opposite deadly side of the room where one step led to the pool. But then when she thought about it, she felt it fit Pei Nan's weird personality quite well. He was a bully. She was sure if he didn't like someone, he wouldn't warn them about the pool. She was partially right. No one has ever gone pass the third curtain. Each hallway had tables and chairs set up for his guests depending on their ranking and importance. If anyone dared to go any further, they would land in the trap, the pool. Not that Yu Mei cared.

Her hands were on the next curtain but something kept her from opening it…loud chattering. It was his voice. Yu Mei covered her mouth with her hands. That voice was none other than Pei Nan's. [What to do…what to do? Hurry and think brain] There were only three options; go back in his bedroom, hide inside the pool or be caught.

Pei Nan, accompanied by his lovely advisor Xu Hou Lei slowly made their way one curtain at a time. Hou Lei was probably one of the few people who have ever been in Pei Nan's room. When they lifted the fourth curtain, it was dim. The candles had all been blown out. It was dark but thanks to the light from the back hall and his room, Pei Nan could make out the blurry dark objects. It didn't matter if he could see or not, he had walked inside this room thousands of times. He could walk along the path just fine. Hou Lei on the other hand couldn't. "Eh! You did this on purpose right?" Hou Lei teased.

"What are you talking about?" Pei Nan didn't want to play along with his friend.

"You purposely blew out the candle long ago. There's a woman in your room, isn't there?" Hou Lei dared not take a gamble on his life. Even though he had truly been to Pei Nan's room countless times, it was not enough to walk in with no lights. "Would you like to see?" Pei Nan dared him.

"No no…I'll take my leave then," Hou Lei bid his serious friend goodbye. If there was truly a woman in his bedroom, Pei Nan would be acting flustered. With that, Hou Lei assumed no one was really there.

Pei Nan walked passed the pool and disappeared into his room.

While at the Southern Palace, Pei Nan had indeed sent Feng Ju over with a bank note. Of all people, he had sent Feng Ju again. Pei Nan didn't realize that this small request of his would make Feng Ju so angry. He avoided all attention by using his martial arts to jump roof to roof until he appeared in front of Yu Mei's room. But why was that woman there?

The dark and gloomy Feng Ju walked over to the dozing Chu'mei. He stood in front of her and rolled his eyes. "Ahem" he coughed loudly, waking up the cute little Chu'mei. She rubbed her eyes a few times before looking up. {Feng Ju?] She had to rub her eyes a few more times. Her little body immediately jumped up. "What are you doing here?" a very nervous Chu'mei asked. Not nervous because he was here but nervous because her lady wasn't here. "I'm here under Prince Nan's orders,"

"Prince Nan? What does he want?"

"This," he pulled out the bank note from his sleeve and waved it in front of Yu Mei. "My lady is sleeping right now. She specifically told me not to let any disrupt her sleep." Chu'mei tried to snatch the bank note out of his hand. Just like his master, he was one step ahead of her. He put his hand behind his back, hiding the bank note from her.

"Give it to me," she huffed and puffed while putting her hands on her waist.

"If that's the case, I will come back tomorrow." Before she could have the final say, he jumped out of her view. "Crazy jerk!" she pointed at Feng Ju who was clearly not in her view anymore.

Back at Pei Nan's palace, Yu Mei slowly and quietly popped her head from under the water. She had actually chosen to hide under water. She had just enough time to blow both candles out and jump into the water. [Damn you two. Why must you talk so much? Don't you know I almost died?] She took deep breathes, trying to catch her breath. She had been hiding at the corner of the pool where it was the hardest to spot. Thankfully Pei Nan had not caught her. She grabbed onto the edge of the pool and tried to pull herself out. The upper half of her body was out of the water when a flickering candlelight suddenly appeared from the opposite side, casting a shadow. "What are you doing?"