10/09/2021
Chanelle
I don't know why I look in the mirror every morning, like I'm going to start putting on makeup or fixing my long hair.
I make a scornful grimace in front of my reflection, retracing every single defect in my body.
My long wavy locks go all the way to my hips, but people who know me always tell me to cut my hair, or put some color on my cheeks, as I'm always so damn pale.
Even my lips are made of a light pink, and in the morning they are small and plump, 'shaped like a little heart' - my sister says.
If only she saw me in this big black shirt now, she'd kick me out of the house today. Not to mention the dark jumpsuit that wraps my legs.
I take a deep breath, resuming looking into my reflection in the green eyes, as if it could help me give courage to myself.
Until three weeks ago I was in university and I didn't have to worry about my future. It was enough for me to sit on my bed solving math problems from morning to night, sometimes only to distract myself, but now I want my own life.
An independent life away from my sister, a job and a home that is my own.
One of those I've always dreamed of, a small and cozy apartment in the center of this city.
I've always liked Miami and I'm not going to leave this paradise, despite all the job offers abroad. But I definitely have to find an apartment away from this, as far away as possible to avoid getting in the way of my sister and her boyfriend.
"Ah!" - I widen my eyes and bring a hand to my mouth to avoid throwing up when my sister's moans reach my ears.
With a disgusted grimace, wondering how they can be so excited even in the morning, I hurry to take a couple of steps towards the door that allows me to look out every evening on the balcony of my bedroom, convincing myself that one day I have to talk with the owner to get rid of these damn stairs that lead straight to my room from the outside.
At the very thought of it my heart rises in my throat as I grit my teeth to turn all my sadness into anger, bringing a lock of hair behind my ear.
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