DISTRACTED.

Grandma!!!" I hollered at my granny from the front door. She was my shrink, my friend, the only person who was with understanding and meaning to every crazy shit that happens to me or I encountered since childhood.... From the door; clutching the handle of the main entrance whiles using my left heel to mash the back of my right foot to pull off my sneaker on that leg then reciprocated the action on the other leg. I always did that to dodge bending over and caused avoidable damage to my sole's helpful companion, my shoes! in my attempt to remove them instead of with my hands as a normal human being should! yet I wouldn't. laziness at simple task will not kill me! Unheeding all the countless cautions I received from my parents for this behaviour.

"That is a classless behavior for a lady!" Their nagging national anthem.

Complacency was the wall I leaned on and my parents wealth the fortified soft cushion of comfort I rested my overly sweet head on, cause I had tons of shoes and would pick up another if I saw a fresh one I liked at any given time, making me hard eared to the right manners. Bad habits of years are not done away with easily as we know.

Here lies the case, I could take out spine ripping work from our employees at the business centre but can't simply stoop over to undo my foot wear. What can I do? Can't help it the least! lols! I am even surprised at myself, as this simple task comes off as a draining job to me! when it wasn't! I was used to it and did it inadvertently most especially when I was in a hurry! 'To do what?' You would ask.

W-ell! When my grandmother, my sweet bestie! and my gossip associate was in town and I had a gist or tantrum to throw ... for her and simply couldn't wait to share. As for fostering my employees duties? Sighs! It is a painful situational thing better left unsaid.

Grandma lives in the village but visits once in a while to keep us company. That would be specifically me. She used to extend her stay for my sake when I was younger but readjusted when I clocked the legal age 18. Definitely not fair! I must say. She decided I was too old for all my whims to be met. Cruel right? Although, I still get pampered Anyways. Nevertheless, I feel terribly wronged. 'Oh! My entitled bitch ass! Eeh! Menacingly so! All my attempts to get her to stay permanently with us failed. Incompetent me! Disgracefully! I wonder what I was possibly thinking, when I thought I could make anybody stay with me when I couldn't lightly get my own personal person to! I must truly be a nuisance. SMH! 'Feeling bitterly sagged within.'

She'd rather be a blue moon timer than resident with the excuse of not being a burden. Weightless talk! Right? How could she ever burden us? We are her family, the only one she's actually ever got. How can she even reason as well as proceed to say that? However, I know she is just making excuses, one she hasn't noticed hurts really bad or just doesn't care. But with awareness she is not a selfish human, I think it is an unplaced oversight.

That notwithstanding, I enjoy all the times I shared with her and still do with her. She is like my fairy godmother, makes magic happens in my life! almost always in my support, consolation and understanding. I attest to the fact that, I share a strong unbreakable bond with her than my parents. It is said, girls are mostly close to their fathers ... wrong assumption! in my case. Because? I am not. Neither am I even close to my mother for that matter. It is and has always been and will always be Naana!

"Maama!!! 'Granny in the local dialect.' I continued to bellow.

"Here comes trouble." Her Grandma whispers beneath her breath with a face captured with the warmest knowing smile awaiting 'Kea' as she also affectionately calls her granddaughter an abbreviation for Keana.

I pop my head out her door to vent. She is aware of the fire extinguishing long-time role she had been playing in the family for some time now in regards to me singularly. when I get into it with my old folks thus my mum and dad? She is the referee and always finds a way to make me win the argument. After which I get cautioned behind the scenes. Setting me right in the presence of my parents would have made me feel unappreciated, less of myself resulting in extreme rebellion. I think as the elder she is, she got this and handled me more sensibly at the expense of my parents displeasure. Wisdom they say came with age and hers complimented her age perfectly well. That is why she is the best ever.

*******

"I didn't know kish! had it in, for me all this while and was just waiting for a perfect timing to unleash her venom. If not for the incident which happened today to expose her? I'd have thought, she was an ally. Misleading myself gullibly! Not noticing she was a nemesis!" I lodged my complaints pointing an accusatory finger. " In fact! I am convinced, I have been her target for a long time now only revealed today! I am very certain. I can assure you! she dealt with me brutally today to her heart's content at my devastating expense. Oh! My poor soul! 'i exclaimed in bereavement dramatically.' I never would have believed that cockroach mocked my predicament in secret."

"What makes you think such of her?" Maama interrogated from her room. she indulges me in all my excesses without holding back. if I called her my favourite person in this whole planet!? You should see my reason. My mom would have berated I was going to mess her eardrums up and cautioned to wait until I got in close proximity with her. Thank goodness! for her absence.

All the while, I began my report from the main door, through the sitting area before now reaching Naana's room door. Nonetheless, she didn't make me feel bad instead she replied through the distance too. I was desperate to narrate my gruesome ordeal to her and it felt as though she was too far when she was just few steps away. I couldn't have felt any good getting home knowing she was there! Even better, I was now going to be right with her to let out what was eating me up.

"Grandma! Can you imagine?" I asked turning my grandma's room door knob to make my entry.

"Nope! " Grandma simply said, seated on her bed concentrated with the clothes she was handling when I entered her room so caught up in myself, I missed them.

"This guy particularly, came into our eatery today, instantly! I had a bad vibe and am still having same right now remembering." I garnished it to appeal to her. Which was also the truth anyways.

"Pretty pre-judgemental and petty you there." Contributed her, looking at me awkwardly.

"No! " I shouted in refute taking a mock offense. "I couldn't possibly be! if there was anyone who gave everyone the benefit of their doubt? 'i debated her claim.' You know that is definitely me maama. 'I defended with my chivalry character as a bases.' It's just how I felt, sincerely. I am plainly expressing myself in crystal." I begged with my tone and actions for her to agree with me.

She only smiles in courtesy then asked ... "And?"

"Well, initially I was in the kitchen,filling the fridge with some drinks when the lazy ass kisha called for my attention ... only to taunt me into meeting this animal of a guy! supposed to be a customer. I simply summarise the whole play out to her gingerly waiting for a positive buttress just to receive a stale response.

"You are the manager. Meeting a client isn't bad for business?" Grandma robbed it in to my dismay, in a misunderstood way. 'Goodness! Gracious! Is this granny? I'd be damned! What's wrong with her today? This is unlike Naana. It looks like everything is working against me! even grandma was different today. Which side of the bed did I really lay yesterday?' I questioned superstitiously in my skull.

"No! I mean yes! Handling a customer is okay. I am not complaining. What I mean is, she was playing match maker with this one! Grandma." I said exasperated.

"Oh! Really? That is interesting." Was my grans response to my disappointment. My authentic Maama's first reaction would have been that of devastation for my sake. I mean she normally gets it all when I begin. she was like a magician who could read my thought before I even spoke and my emotions before I expressed them, which made the conversation with her so much easier than with mum. However, today? She is acting weird! Which is the least affecting me right now, but getting me all wrong? is a big No! No! and very serious, I must say. It is like she is just tagging along lines making me stressed. She wasn't like that this morning not before then. she was a solution provider for me! Not distress compressor. Something is undoubtedly a miss today. Everybody was acting as if they were under a hex to drive me nuts! and my! oh! my! is the hex executing the task perfectly! I feel torn apart. Dejected! Alone to say the least!

"There was nothing interesting with that two, grans. I know my relationships are messy but that does not give the nosy insolent girl the right to do what she did. Just look where it ended me?" I volunteered with the comment I had wanted to hear for consolation and topped up my claim.

"And where did it end you, if I may?" She replied asking on a calm tone.

"Well! I needed up rascally, sick and soaked without any meaningful explanation."

"Seriously?" Maama asks to my surprise as she raised as eye brow in concern strangely adding."I see this really got to you Hun." It seems she has not identified my change of clothes yet.

"Of course ... it did! Who wouldn't it get to anyway!?" I responded rhetorically.

"Fine dear! Let's take it one at a time so I can get you." She calmed me.

"Sure! That sounds good for me grandma."

"Ok! Baby girl, take a breath in and let it out gently. Good! Now take it from there." This exercise made me rested for a better telltale, most of all, it also brought the recognition of what I was missing being so engrossed in myself. Grandma listened initially but paid not rapt attention, as always. She was distracted. It looked as if she was lost in thoughts too. I had forgotten she was a human too with her own rioting businesses to settle, all these years she was there for me. I always came to dump my trash on her not bothering to ask for once if she was ok! Self-conceited merciless spoilt brat such as me! I swear it was unconscious. It never did cross my mind. Sadly. If I would be accused of doing granny any wrong? It would be my inattentiveness to her. Pitiful woman! something bothered her to the extent where the whole Naana, herself! was distracted but was also willing to give me her ears and mind now. The irreplaceable woman! when she said those words, my mind reversed back to the words that relaxed me in the daytime when I was boiling within and without. Withal, I was not hanging on to it because Naana had given me a platform with her attention to get her on my side and that was where my focus was now. Disgusting selfish behavior notably, I should be penitent for!

"The day was eerily quiet as if a foreboding of a sinister roll out later which threadbare. After a lengthy back and forth with Kisha, that extremist cajoled me into going to take this strange guys orders, which she should have done in the first place! Not just that but as an attempt to get his attention? As in ... hook me up with him! As I mentioned earlier. Could you believe that? 'I imposed unbelievably in my hysterics.' Never the less, I walked to the table after a much thought through plan that is, be as snappy as the passing of wind in attending him; in taking his orders politely then vanishing! as if I was nevee near him in the first place! When all of a sudden we were at each other's throats. It began beautifully, like a fairytale. I was taken by him in a way i had never been. Everything was so colourful and splendid like a fantasy dream world ... then the craziness happened! Like rabid dogs we were snapping at each other to the verge it almost became physical! I even spewed some gibberish I can't remember or make out now! which makes me think somehow, it was all in my head except for the present characters involved as proves! 'Rae! Ra..! ' She tried bringing back the incantations to only fall short.' It was as though I was having an out-of-body work. I was there my body's mouth moved but it was not me. like channeling ... you get me right grandma? "I asked hoping with all my will she would, if not? I wouldn't know how else to clarify what occured.

"Kind of." She said with a more worried look as if she just confirmed something which she effortlessly concealed with a smile. Another disappointment for me there but she will eventually get me. 'I assured myself.' She always does. This I know, because we have a long history of comprehension between us. However, my anxiety grew worse inside. The day had just been left sided to my weakening. I'd think because I didn't trust anything I saw or heard anymore. For what happened earlier has trauma marked me.

"And you know the interesting thing?" I probed again.

"No tell me."

"I heard a growl!" I said with wide eyes like an owls ensuing in my narration, then later doubted myself, if I did.

"Did you?"

"Did I? or was I imagining things just like kish suggested?" I said getting a little lost in my loud thoughts.

"As in how?" Grandma posed now with more concern drawn on her screens, am sure for the third party attachment.

My mouth went overdrive at probe. "Could you believe the impetuous thing of a girl relentlessly accused me of having glowing eyes? I answered sarcastically still indifferent about kish's allegations.

"Hmm!" My old lady sighed heavily after the statement I made. "Did she?" She inquired again, as if to confirm something mirroring all what I was saying painfully.

"To tell you the truth Maama! I don't know reality from a virtual universe as I am presently." I weak toned down casted. With this honest statement she paused what she was doing for a while, pushed the rest pile of her clothes which am now noticing a little further on to her bed; tapped close her side on the bed once occupied by her laundry; in gesture for me to come sit near her. This is what she does when she wanted to explain stuff I missed or don't understand as well as tell me, one of her Amazon warrior folk tales. There is this particular one she does tells with a lot of enthusiasm with an added detail ever since I was a baby till now and it never ceases to interest me, in fact it lights me up. I would say, I feel kind of connected to this one specifically. I will ask her to reenact it for me later to see which other details pops up to relax me. There is always a new exciting addition to the plot whenever she spins it. I run to her side not all too close but enough to my head on her lap, laying on my side for some pampering. Girl! I really needed that for the shitty day I have had.

"Let's put everything you went through together today and see how to make the best sense out of it, shall we? 'She consoled in a soothing tone to my head nod in agreement. So this young man came by the business, who gave you a jittery felling then you had a misunderstanding with him consequently for no apparent reason. You also heard a supposed growl coming from this specific fellow, you also spoke crazy then your friend also told you, you had glowing eyes at the end of it all." She puts it on point! So simple just as all her solutions to all my problems since childhood. She couldn't have made this one time packaging of my woes in a whole day any befitting.

"Yes Grandma." I agreed sweet headed. Finally! she got me right." I thought with a smug reticent smile.

"How do you feel now?" My grandma asked.

"Did you really have to ask?" Maa! with you, I am always peaceful, relevant understood and with solutions to my chaos. You are the best Grandmother I would ever wish for in the entirety of the universe." Somehow, I became emotional for no pertinent reason. I felt like hugging her so tightly and I did just that! Which I caught her off guard with, that brought a burst of laughter out of her.

"Naughty little thing!" She say as she returns the action rounding me in her arms comfortingly. In a way, I missed her when she was right there with me. And I didn't understand it. Her warm embrace felt cold today ... why? If only I had know earlier that ..