MISS EVA

I entered the restaurant and he was still there,waiting.I glanced at my watch,it was midnight.That was how badly he wanted to speak to me.My heart crushed for him,I sympathized.Did he deserve it?No.He was a jerk,at least I thought. "Eva,you came,"he seemed surprised and relieved to see me. He stood up to help me take a seat across him at the table by pulling the chair back for me. "Thanks,"I said in almost a whisper. "I thought you wouldn't show.I'm glad you're here,"he said as he took his seat.He sounded nervous and that was a bad sign.A nervous Carlos?Never thought I'd see the day,but there we were. "I almost didn't come to be honest,then there was traffic,so you better make this worthwhile,"I said trying not to show that I was still upset with him.He nodded as he bit his lower lip,as if not sure where to start.I was upset but I couldn't not notice how hot he looked.New hair cut,that white T-shirt through which the tattoos on his chest were visible... He lightly took my hands, which I had rested on the table,into his.I wanted to pull away but I couldn't.It felt so good. "Should I get you something to drink first?"He asked. "No,I'm good,"I politely declined and gathered the strength to pull away from his soft touch. "So,tell me,"I reminded him that he wanted to talk to me about something. "I don't know what Lauren told you but we are not together,"he started."We broke up before I moved here.We figured we couldn't do long distance and she didn't want to come with me,"he continued. "Then why would she lie to me?"I asked,not wrapping my finger around the whole situation. "She assumed we would be getting back together,"Carl explained further but it left me more confused. "Why?"I asked "She's pregnant Eva.She's expecting our child.She came to Mexico to tell me that,"he dropped the bombshell and my heart dropped into my stomach.I swear I could hear my intestines twist in there. "She's eight weeks now,"he added.I was wishing he stopped talking.That was a lot to take in,God! "Say something,Eva,"Carlos begged as I sat there in silence. "What am I supposed to say?The man I love is expecting a child with another woman.It's a lot to take in,"I as I blinked in a bid to keep my tears from falling.I lost and the tears came crushing down my cheeks.Carlos was smiling,I didn't know why. "That's the first time you've said that.That you love me,"he said and I understand why he had smiled earlier. "I'm sorry Eva,"he said and stood up from his seat.He went down on one knee in front of me and offered me his handkerchief. "You shouldn't be sorry.I wish things were different.I wish I had known you at a different time,"I said as I dried my tears with his handkerchief. "Me too,I'm sorry it is complicated,"he whispered again and I stooped a little bit to hold his chin as a sign of reassurance.I caught a tear in his beards.I thought I always loved complicated,till that day. "We'll be fine,"I said to him."But I hope you understand that I can't be with you Carlos,I don't want to be reason why your baby doesn't grow with you by their side.I wouldn't be able to forgive myself,"I said and he buried his head in my lap.He was crying,he was losing it.I could tell from the tears that were seeping through my emerald dress.I softly rubbed his hair to comfort him. I lost him even before I had him.Love!

Nexa_Darrel · Urban

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25 Chs

#BETRAYAL

#FATEDLOVE

#FAMILY

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I felt like several arrows had been aimed at my chest,all managing to puncture my ribcage.I didn't have the strength to pull them out yet I had to.How was I supposed to deal with so many emotions at the same time?I hadn't even had time to process all the recent events in my life.

"Is it okay that I'm so mad that he kept this from me?"I asked Carlos who was seated next to me at the waiting lounge in the hospital. "Whatever you are feeling,don't block it off,"he said. "I hate having to feel things.I really hate it!It's during times like this that I could use a cigar or two,"I said.He was silent,just listening to all my venting.

"I was actually about to tell him my biggest secret and just get it off my chest.Turns out he had a secret of his own.When do they end?The secrets?And you know what everyone uses as an excuse?They are trying to protect me!Like hell I need protecting!"I went on and on. "I'm sorry.I just feel what I feel,"I said after a while.I was just bothering him with all my venting and ranting.

"Don't ever apologize for how you feel,"he said to me and I fell back in my seat,arms across my chest. "When did you learn about him?Dad?"I changed the subject. "When I was seventeen,"he said. "I was so mad at my mum for not letting me meet my father.All those years?He missed out on my childhood and that stung,"he said. "I was an angry child growing up.I had a step father but he was a fucking nightmare,"he opened up. "Wow,I can't believe I'm having a heart to heart conversation with you,"he added and we laughed.

"Me neither.It's good,right?"I spoke and he turned to look into my eyes with his gaze that always made my heart drop."It is good.I like it,"he said and I nodded.

"Got any secrets of your own Gomez?"I asked him. "I mean,everyone has a secret and you already know mine,"I added. "Trust me,you don't wanna know.I've lived a dangerous life.I'm not proud of it,"he said. "You'll know some day,"he said and it sounded more like a promise.Suddenly,the doctor walked towards us.

"How is dad?"I asked him almost immediately. "He'll be fine but he should spend the night here.His treatment isn't working.We need to switch it up a little bit,"he said."What does that mean?"Carlos asked,the terror in his voice so evident. "We are starting him on stronger drugs and a phlebotomy every two weeks.The prognosis is not so good at the moment,"he explained. "He's going to be fine,right?"I asked.

"He's a fighter.He's asking for you by the way,"the doctor said to me.Carlos gave me a go ahead look.I nodded and headed to the private wing where dad was. "Hey,"he said to me as I walked into the ward. "Hey,"I said."You are not allowed to me be sad,"he said. "I can't help it,"I said as I sat next to him on the bed. "I'm scared,"I said to him."That makes the two of us,"he said. We hugged for a while and I let myself feel all the pain that there was to feel. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you.I was scared of seeing you crush like this,"Xavi whispered. "Trust me,everyone has secrets,"I seemed to have made peace with that fact. "Get better,okay?I still need my dad,"I said and smiled amidst the tears. "I'm seeing a psychiatrist tomorrow,"I found myself saying.I didn't even know if it was the right time to tell him what was going on with me.I felt like it was right to tell him at that moment. "Psychiatrist?Why?"He asked. "I have a drug problem dad,"I finally got it off my chest.He broke off from our embrace. "My baby girl has a drug problem?"He asked and I nodded.He was silent for a whole five minutes as if trying to figure out whether I was lying or telling the truth.

"Dad,please say something,"I begged him because the silence was killing me. "How long have you been using?"He asked. "Three years.On and off,"I said and he shook his head in disbelief. "All this time and I didn't even notice?Who sells to you?"He asked.

"Seriously?You just found out I have a drug problem and the first question you ask is who sells to me?How about why did you start using drugs?"I said to him.

"You know what dad?You should have noticed that I was into drugs.If you'd have looked at me even for one minute you could have seen it.I'm sorry I'm not the perfect daughter,"I said and left his ward.I didn't care what he felt or what he thought.No more secrets.I felt so free.

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