Depths:love or lust?

I returned home as early as I could, before Mrs Davies started panicking. I also didn't want her having second thoughts as to why I suddenly came up with a story of being a volunteer . 'She just mustn't know'. I thought as I walked as fast as my legs could take me.

'My daughter is back home!.' She exclaimed.

Welcome,how did it go?Hope you're not so stressed?.She asked heartily.

I was just about calling you. You know I cannot stay long without you. . .'She said playfully as she smiled.

' look at me, deceiving this woman. ' I mumbled.

I knew I had done something wrong. I just kept managing to smile as she kept praising me. But still, I was so happy because it was a new beginning for me.

' It's time for me to explore new things.' just like Vivi advised. I muttered to myself as I walked flaunting to my room.

That night, I slept like a new born. I was really so happy experiencing what I have seen and heard other ladies experience; love. It was my first time so why wouldn't I take it that special?

Mrs Davies went to bed unusually happy,all because she thought I volunteered to work in the church. I was becoming that 'church girl ' that she had always wanted. I guess . . .

Bryan and I had been friends even before the relationship thing started . So,it was quite easy . The late night calls,the early morning text messages,long hours of chat and video calls were not tasking for me. It had become a chore that I enjoyed doing. I started rolling in so fast and Vivian was really coaching a lot.(smiles).

She would say, ' girlfriend 's duty no be joke . You have to always watch your ' man ' so,those small brats will just take him off you .Do it this way.'

Sometimes, I find some useful while I just ignore some because I had known Bryan long enough for him to do stuffs like that. I would always tell Vivi, ' My Bryan is not like that!'.

Although, I rarely get the chance to go out to see Bryan and that was very annoying and frustrating. Yet, I didn't want Mrs Davies to know about him. I only get to see him on some Saturdays whenever I take permission to go to church. That was my usual back up lie and it always worked for me. She was always happy, she would always pray and hope that someday I would totally change, repent and become that ' church girl '. Me, I wasn't even prepared to be one . Even though I sometimes regret doing it, I still had no choice than to continue because I was really loving up and it was all that mattered to me. Bryan was giving all the attention I needed,so what else? I no longer feel bored whenever she leaves the house for work. In fact, I always pray she leaves early so that I could have the whole house to myself and Bryan on call all day.

How I started loving, I don't know. But as we grew closer, the bond was getting really strong and irresistible. Yet, I couldn't bring Mrs Davies to the truth.

Sometimes, whenever I'm alone,I always ask myself , ' Am I doing the right thing? Is it not the same path Mrs Davies treaded that I'm also treading? Am I making my parents happy wherever they are?. . .and so many questions .They were times when I thought to end all and be myself,times when I thought of the past and how far I had gone,times when there's a strong feeling of doubt that I was doing the right thing. . .But, Vivi was always there to cheer me on whenever I tell her about my feelings.She would say, 'You'll be fine baby girl. It's not bad trying these things out ehn. This is your own life,live it to the best you can, hun.'

So, I always ended up believing and accepting her advice. I kept on ,going deeper into what they call ' love ' but that I term ' lust '

Then, on a particular day, he requested I attend a party organised by one of his friends. So, technically, I was to come as his babe. I knew it was hot. I needed to be nicely dressed. I felt weird. I had never been in the position to be in a crowd and there, someone calls me or introduces me as his babe.' how does that even feel?'. I thought for a second.

But then, I had no choice. Vivi would do the run up for me. ' I need to really look good.' She said as I told her about it. Vivi had become a confidant.There was virtually nothing about Bryan and I that I don't always tell her about.

It was an evening-night party. What excuse would I give this time?. I had thought.

As luck would have it, earlier that morning, Mrs Davies called me to her room.

As I entered, I saw her packing a few things in a small travel bag. ' Is she traveling? '. I thought .

Then, she held me by her side and said; ' Mira, I'll be traveling to Port Harcourt and will not be back until tomorrow evening...' The moment she said that, my heart stopped beating for a second.' Really? I'm the luckiest girl today. As in, equation solved.' I thought. Deep inside me, I was so happy, I mean, it's a lucky day. Yet, I tried to put on a pretence look like I was really not cool with the idea. I put on that pitiful and teary look, and said ; ' Mum, are you going to leave without me like that? You know how much l suffer in boredom whenever you leave for work talk less of this?. I mumbled as I said.

' I'm really sorry,but don't worry baby. I promise to make it up to you. You can always have Vivian's company. Moreso, I have provided all that you'll be needing, your food is in the microwave. No stress Hun!!.Just keep reading your books. She said as she hugged me tightly and said ' I'll miss you. But it's just a day anyways.'

I was really happy. At least, I didn't have to rack my head thinking of how to fabricate a story to get the chance to go out.

That night was a night to remember. I had dressed nicely and Vivi had helped with make up to look great. I was set to leave. I had settled the security man.So, here's to a free world! I took nice pictures of myself and Bryan.Oh!, I forgot to add. Bryan had promised to come pick me after all is set. So, we zoomed off. ' I really can't wait to experience this too. I'm going out as someone's babe. . . I blushed as I said.

Bryan just kept smiling...