Basic needs

After a few hours of relentless abusing of his keyboard Norn finally found a ritual to fix his luck! 

Sadly, it was just a "legend" that wanted whoever believed it to make a circle using his own blood.

Thus, Norn thought of it as a demonic ritual that was made to sacrifice something in exchange for some luck.

As for it working or not - he didn't even think, it was obviously bullshit.

However, towers, magic, dungeons and monsters were also bullshit until some time ago! 

Who knew if this method really worked or not!? 

After all, he found it on an old forum where people talked about their experiences with supernatural things!

Recently, it was revitalized due to an abundance of such stories.

Their encounters with monsters, dungeon raids or skill information... all could be found here! 

Sadly, this luck "ritual" that Norn found predated appearance of magic in his world.

Thus, it was definitely bullshit...

But, that didn't stop Norn, as he was an imbecile who couldn't think logically.

Of course, there were always people like him... and trolls.

Lots of positive comments in the thread made Norn think of actually doing it! 

Even if it worked - what would he sacrifice for some luck?

His dick? He wouldn't use it anyway and it's not like he couldn't pee without it, so why bother with it? 

Well, anyway, Norn didn't plan on sacrificing anything.

His plan was to cheat, and get those sweet luck points for free! 

How would he cheat, you ask? 

Well, Norn would like to know the answer to that question himself, and he had absolutely no idea on how to actually do it.

That, however, didn't stop him from trying this ritual...

...

"O great I'leek'aos, please grant me luck!"

Norn cried out loud, crawling around a circle made out of his own blood.

It wasn't all that hand exctracting it, as he had [Fearless] title that basically made him even more retarded, practically nullifying his fear altogether.

Hard part, however, did exist, as there were 3 more circles around him, that weren't even circles.

One of them resembled a rectangle, somehow, and one was just spherical, far from a circle.

Thus, Norn had to use his brains to draw a good circle.

It was hard, as Norn didn't ever use it before, i didn't, either.

But... it didn't stop him.

Best he could think of was finding a circle that could be drawn around.

He spent nearly an hour sorting through his inventory.

Not because he was stupid or anything, but because his system decided that sorting anything wasn't a proper thing to do.

As such, every single chair was in a different slot, even if they were basically the same for Norn, for that system they weren't.

And so, he found something that looked like a pillow, then drew around it with his blood.

[Bloodied cushion] was how it was called by the system.

Norn didn't even know what a cushion is, to him, it was just a giant pillow.

...

"Is it because i'm making a bad circle, or is that because this method doesn't work?"

Norn pondered as he stood in a middle of a room that was now filled with bloody "circles".

He wasn't smart enough to even consider that he's being played by some fat troll.

[Status window]

"Yeah my luck is still negative 15, bullshit"

He was angry. 

Not only he was unlucky, he had to clean all this mess! 

"Right! It's because i'm so unlucky that it doesn't work, how did i not think of it!?"

What? Is he actually retarded?

I know that i called him that several times, but to actually think that...

Oh, forget it. 

...

After some time his room was "clean".

I say clean, but in really it was even more of a mess now.

Norn didn't think of anything better than just spraying the whole room with some cleaning solutions he had in his inventory.

Of course, the concept of a bucket and a mop didn't exist in his brain, so he used magic.

Obviously, it didn't work as good as he imagined.

In his mind that water stream he's about to cast will be enough to work as a DIY power-wash.

It didn't. In fact, if you'd seen it yourself you'd think that it resembles a stream that's usually coming from a ...

On a second thought - dont imagine that.

Anyway, after properly cleaning this mess...

Yeah, properly. 

Remember that cushion he used to draw circles? Well, he used it to wipe the floor! 

Why not? It's already dirty, so why not make it even worse? 

At least the floor looked better now, it was far from being okay, but at least you couldn't see blood unless you looked for it.

Afer "properly" cleaning this mess Norn went outside.

For some stupid reason he wanted to eat! I wonder how that works!?

Suprisingly, he didn't forget that he didn't actually have any money, thus, he first needed to go a nearest pawn shop to sell shit.

On the way... 

Wait, i said "sell shit", you might think that Norn will actually try that, dont worry, it's just how i expressed myself, he was going to sell monster parts and furniture.

On the way there, however, he encountered a problem... a woman! 

That woman was strange, she wore some medieval-looking clothes along with some pieces of leather armor.

Yeah, it didn't look good, Norn thought just that when he saw her, but just as he was about to walk past her...

"Hey, you! Stop right there!"

She cried out, looking fierce.

Norn didn't bother and just continued walking, as he did whenever a problem like that appeared.

To his surprise, that woman didn't want to let go! 

She followed him, and several steps later... she grabbed his shoulder!

If it was Norn from a month ago, he would've fallen in love with her! 

But now, after he saw that he's good enough to have someone as beautiful as Erika by his side...

"Scram, woman! I dont have time to meddle in worldly affairs!"

Norn said loudly, swinging his sleeve at her!

It would've been effective if he had any. 

He didn't even have a shirt, so in her eyes, he simply swung his arm at her!

"You!.. What are you doing here!? Hunters are prohibited from entering this place, it belongs to Morning Sun guild!"

Her face looked even worse now, not that she was ugly or anything, but due to her rage it didn't look that good.

"Morning Sun? More like Morning Boner, no better than that! Mortals like you have no right to stop me on my path!"

Norn decided to play big and launched a fierce mental attack!

It was super effective! That woman couldn't think of anything to respond to him in several seconds, so he just turned around and started leaving, praising himself.

However, as he walked for a meter or so...

"You bastard, where are you going!?"

She wasn't willing to let go! 

That angered Norn, that woman just couldn't understand that he was far above her! 

As such, he used the method he used the most in his life, the one that always saved him!

[Haste]. He ran. 

It wasn't really a problem to run away from her as his magic was quite powerful for this world.

Also, unbeknownst to him, [Will] that also affected how powerful his magic is! 

Of course, the formula for it wasn't 100% of [Magic] and 100% of [Will], but 100% [Magic] and 25% [Will], which resulted in his spell being almost 50% more powerful!

[Haste]

He murmured once more, to check if they stacked. They didn't.

[Greater Haste] 

He murmured once again...

He didn't even know that spell, he just tried his luck.

Mind you, it was negative 15.

As Norn ran, he didn't even look back, it's not like he didn't want mess with the wrong people, it's just that he was hungry.

He simply wanted to eat something, as his stomach was now giving him signs.

Not those that women gave him from time to time... Yes, women that liked Norn actually existed, it's just that he was too stupid to understand...

Unlike his stomach's sign, that one he got perfectly.

He needed food ASAP!

Several minutes later he finally arrived to his destination, his favourtie pawn shop! 

"Well, i could've guessed..."

He said silently as he looked at a sign above his head.

[Barty's Pawn Shop]

[Best place to sell your spoils!]

"If this guy doesn't buy my furniture i'm going to kill him..."

He thought as he entered the door...

"Welcome, dear cus..."

A weak looking middle-aged man said with a smile as soon as he hear the door open.

However, he immediately stopped when he saw who it was. 

"Oh... It's you again, i only buy monster parts now, get lost."

He didn't even bother to look at him when he said it.

The man was too busy looking on his computer screen.

"I'll sell you some goblin bodies and their crystals if you also buy some furniture from me."

Unlike everything else, Norn actually knew how to bargain.

It's not like was great, but at least he knew the basics.

"Oh?"

The middle-aged man exclaimed in surprise, glancing at Norn.

"And where are those goblin bodies u're talking about?"

He didn't question his credibility by saying that, but wanted to check their quality.

"There."

Norn said as he threw a dead goblin on the counter.

It wasn't decomposed or anything. 

On the contrary - it was still warm. 

The middle-aged man, whose name was Barty as you might already assume, started examining the body.

"Did you kill it outside my shop or something? It's not even cold yet!"

Barty couldn't help but get shocked! It was the first time he got such a good goblin body! 

It's not like they were particularly useful or anything, some shawarma shops bought them in bulk, but other than that they were useless.

With the exception of their cores, of course, just like any other monster they had them.

Their quality was far from good, but a core is a core, so it was quite expensive even though it was shit.

Half a minute later the middle-aged man extracted a core from that dirty little goblin on his counter.

"Not bad, i can give you 150$ for that one."

Barty said with a kind smile.

"Fuck off you old cunt, it's 200$ at least. Also, i wont sell it unless you buy my furniture."

Norn's expression instantly changed as he heard what the middle-aged man said.

It wasn't the first time he tried to scam him, and Norn had an impression that he was doing it just to see him angry.

"Okay okay, what are you selling?"

The smile didn't fade from Barty's face, it became even wider.

Hearing his words, Norn swung his right arm and some furniture appeared. 

He then swung once more, and more furniture appeared, along with that dirty cushion he used to wipe the floor.

Seeing that, Norn quickly put it back into his inventory.

"Oh, you have an [Inventory]! Good skill to have, kid! Judging by the amount of crap you took from it it's quite high ranked, you struck it big!"

The middle-aged man didn't get greedy or anything.

Actually, he knew Norn for 10 or so years, he was a "friend" of his.

Norn knew that, so he didn't even bother showing him that he has [Inventory], which might as well be one of the most imbalanced non-combat skills out there.

"But... I dont really need that crap, i can give you around 300$ for all of it..."

Friend or not, he couldn't just buy it off at a high price. It wasn't an exaggeration to say that even those 300$ were quite a price for that crap.

"Fine, i have more thought."

He then swung his arm once more.

Norn didn't need to swing his arm to use [Inventory] though, he was just showing off.

"Damn you, kid..."

Middle-aged man's expression wasn't that good anymore...

...

Ten or so minutes later Norn left the pawn shop with a stack on notes in his hand.

"800$ to get some food... I hope inflation didn't hit yet..."

"Still, i have more goblin bodies, so if i need more i can get more..."

He didn't think too much about it, as he was sure that it's not that bad yet.

800$ was enough, even though his city wasn't that cheap, 800$ was still quite a sum.

...

An hour or so later he got back home.

He didn't encounter anything dangerous or even interesting, so i think we can skip that part.

What did he buy? 

Well, since he's used to living alone due to... well, whore of a mother, he knew what he needed to eat to not feel hunger.

He bought some meat... some, 20kg that he put into his inventory so it wont spoil.

Some Coco-Cool'o to balance his sugar, as he thought it's important.

Some rice, which was strangely expensive...

And some vegetables & sauces i wont even bother to mention, as it's not that important. Just basic food, okay?

"Why the fuck was rice 20$ for a kilogram!? Is it made of fucking gold now or something?!"

Was the first thing he thought when he saw the price, but since rice was the only thing he knew how to cook properly - he didn't have a choice.

Even basic macaroni was a wall to him...

As such, with a somewhat tired face Norn began cooking...

Several hours later he was done...

Why hours? Well, because he was stupid, but smart at the same time.

If the goblin body didn't rot in his inventory - meat wont either.

If the goblin body didn't even lose any temperature - meat wont either...

So, he decided to cook all of it. It wont spoil or anything, and he could have a snack whenever he wanted!

It was truly an imbalanced ability!