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memento mori

"A few months ago, I would have easily said that you would simply be mine if I wanted it that way.", the taller one continued after a few breaths before he even began to smirk. "A frightening thought, don't you think?", his voice softened. Became more wary. As if he were talking about something forbidden that no one else should hear. Before I could respond to that, though, a shallow touch on my wrist stopped me in my tracks and disappeared before a single sound could leave my lips. "I'm greedy. Envious of Maynard for being watched by you with so much affection and love.", the light-haired man confessed. "Just once. Just once, I want to be looked at from those eyes.", my counterpart whispered, now carefully embracing my forearm. Pulled it closer, which is why I inevitably took a small step in his direction as well. "Not because I have blue blood in me. Not because I have successfully emerged from battles or negotiations. Nor because I later gained power as crown prince and king.", with each word Awin regained more and more of his confident tone. "You never had any hidden agenda. Loved Maynard plain and simple. Was just a woman who loved a man and it was foolish. So foolish, Kalea." The expression on his face changed, however I couldn't quite explain it or even interpret it. "And yet, in doing so, you were the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.", the king murmured as he now gently placed my hand on his chest. Through the fabric it was possible for me to sense his fast beating heart. It seemed to literally race, which is why I could not help it. I looked at him in disbelief, since he usually made a terribly indifferent impression towards me. "Being watched with the same affection just once would be enough for me. I'll give you the world if it satisfies you. Juste give me a chance to change your image of me, please.", Awin whispered. Seemed almost pleading, which was incredibly out of character for him.

UebelBlatt · History
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10 Chs

Cautious approach

"Father?", I echoed mechanically and now looked at the man in front of me with watchful eyes.

The blond hair looked dull and had no shine. Instead, you could already see grayed roots and stray strands.

The green eyes, however, showed sharpness and alertness, despite the outlined wrinkles. They had a clear and truly beautiful musky green that I had never seen before.

In fact, I didn't know what I looked like myself, however, I would be incredibly happy to have similar mirrors. They were very clear and concise.

Purely on the outside, I would guess my counterpart to be in his late forties, however, this was only based on my speculations. After all, I could not recall any memories at the moment.

Therefore, I did not know how to react to his words, not to mention to the man in front of me.

Neither his sight, words, touch, warmth nor scent triggered anything in me. In general, I felt this whole situation just as surreal and found no reference. It actually seemed for this reason as if I were a mere spectator.

Although the man in front of me seemed to be genuinely concerned about me and seems deeply shaken, I could not establish any emotional connection with him.

Neither memories nor other sensations were stimulated by the last few minutes. This fact made this situation incredibly uncomfortable, as it seemed that I could not even recognize my father. The man currently seemed to be really struggling to give me a shaky smile, even though I was probably not only overwhelming him, but also simply hurting him with my memory gap.

He came expecting his sick daughter to have finally woken up, only to come face to face with a stranger who didn't even know his name.

The elder finally caught his breath as well in that moment, as his chest rose and fell frantically over the last few minutes. The proof that my counterpart immediately came to me after he learned that I was conscious and also responsive. Dropped everything to be bitterly disappointed.

"I'm sincerely sorry, but I can't remember you," I confessed after a few moments of hesitation, hoping that maybe it would all come crashing down on me in the next few seconds and I would be able to remember abruptly.

Silently, I watched the reaction of my counterpart, who seemed to hold his breath for a moment before letting it escape abruptly. In fact, he even quirked his lips a bit further into a smile as he cautiously approached my bed.

Was he trying to soothe me?

Because of my current condition, it was impossible for me to sit up, let alone stand. Not to mention the bruises and marks that had developed in the meantime from my fall.

Nervously, I licked my still-cracked lips once, while watching from wary eyes as the man actively decreased the distance between us for the first time.

For some reason, I didn't know why the careful, almost cautious touch surprised me.

Apparently, my father seemed to genuinely care about me and to love me deeply, given his current behavior.

Nevertheless, he stroked my cheek with such uncertainty, as if he expected to be burned at any moment by the slightest touch on my skin.

"Are you not well, father?", I inquired timidly, as I noticed the trembling of his hands and pale face.

Had the shock combined with the commotion been too much for him?

He didn't seem to be the youngest anymore, which is why his current behavior worried me noticeably.

The last thing I wanted was to cause my father even more grief and that, after the psychological pain, he must also suffer physical pain due to me.