Chapter 22 – Understanding

AN: There's nothing like having everything all put together, hitting the save button...and then the goddamn wifi bleeps out on ya. Pardon me if my answers are a little bit short.

Reviewer Replies:

DarkDrawerJ: Glad you're enjoying.

Raidentensho: I had actually never heard of Menace before, but yes, Serena looks exactly like that but with lighter skin and an actual dress instead of just the boob-cover/loincloth combo. (reads your comment about the knock up bomb and laughs)

Guest: Actually I'm rather pleased with myself. Glad you're enjoying.

Ok, now a bit of bad news. This is the last chapter I have complete. So while I'm pretty sure I'll be able to have next week's chapter done in time, I'm not sure how much longer I'll be able to keep up the whole weekly updates thing. When it comes down to it, I may wind up taking a few months off to rebuild my backlog and then restart the weekly posts once I've got a few months worth of chapters built up again (This is such a difficult arc!). Alternatively I could push the update schedule out a bit to give myself more time, like updating every other week or once a month.

One thing I am NOT willing to do though is sacrifice quality for speed, so if I need to take a bit more time to make sure I'm putting out the best story possible then that's what's going to happen. It could be a moot point, I may be able to keep it up, but I didn't want this blindsiding everybody in the event I can't.

That's enough gloomy talk though, it's time for...

Chapter 22 – Understanding

"Jerry, what's the range of your projection?" Erza asked suddenly in the middle of her cake.

I thought about it for a moment, "Depends, but…" I pulled out my power gauge and saw that I was still at ninety-nine percent, "I think I can still reach the Guild Hall from here. Hang on." I reached into my pocket and pulled out the Calling Card Cana had showed me how to make at the party. I only had three, but one was plenty. I reached down the link with my magic to the card linked to Master Makarov.

A moment later he picked up, "Jerry? Is everything alright?"

"Yeah, everything's fine, hang on a second I'm gonna see if I can use my Projection." I shot the magic in question through the link and a moment later a screen popped up over the table showing Master on the other end.

Master looked around through his screen, "Bit of a fancy place. Erza, you're not making Jerry blow all his money to buy you cake are you?" It was hard to tell whether he was teasing or not.

"Of course not!" Erza replied indignantly after swallowing her bite of cake, "We're on a cruise ship because it was the most rapidly available route to Minstrel. Our client, Dr. Whistler, made the arrangements. I was calling to let you know that we'll be gone for at least a month. I asked the captain and even if we made a top speed beeline for Minstrel, it would take another five days. As is, we have a slight detour to our one stop before we get there on the island of Marraca, so it'll be a full week since we'll be at Marraca for a day. Even if we found the city in a day, which is preposterous, we'd still be gone for a little over two weeks."

"Assuming the map we've been given is to scale and accurate," Levy chimed in from her seat where she still had her nose buried in my letter home, "Then if my calculations are correct, given Jerry's flight speed, at best we could make it to the city's estimated location and back in a week, but given that the map is over two centuries old, there's no telling how much has changed, and it wasn't made with a bird's eye view in mind, so we'll probably have to go by land which the map says took about a month when the map was made. Given the team we've got, I think we can probably shave at least a few days off that, but it'll probably still be at least a few weeks to get there, not to mention whatever time we need to actually find it if it's there, or find proof it was there if it's not anymore."

Master nodded, "I see. Very well, I'll make sure everything's taken care of in your absence. Juvia's gone with Gray, Jet, Droy, Ur, Cana and Gildarts to retrieve Juvia and Gajeel's belongings from Oak Town. Is there anyone whose rent I need to see to?"

"Just mine and Levy's I believe," Erza replied.

"Hey is that Jerry?" I heard Mira ask before she walked on screen behind Master Makarov.

"Hi Mira!" I called happily. I knew the instant I saw her something was wrong. I felt the color drain from my face, "Mira?"

"Master, Erza, would you mind if I take a few moments alone with Jerry?" Master looked up in surprise at the somber note in her voice and then immediately handed her the card, "Take as much time as you need."

Erza and Levy's eyes were both shooting from the screen to me and back. I felt like my heart was about to rip itself out of my chest, oh-no-oh-no-oh-no… I teleported back to my cabin and locked the door. Mira made her way to what I recognized as the Archives and sat down on the couch at about the same time as I sat down on the bed. If this was even a quarter as bad as I was afraid it was going to be, then my legs weren't going to hold me. Judging by the fact that she was sitting down too, I had a very strong hunch it was. Nononononono…

Mira was quiet for a moment and then she took a deep breath, "Jerry, I, I don't know how to say this…" I quivered like the last autumn leaf in the first gale of winter, that's not a good start.

"You, remember how we celebrated your birthday?" Mira asked quietly.

I took two seconds to register that, then every alarm bell in my head SCREAMED as my heart STOPPED, "You're pregnant?"

Mira flinched and her eyes went wide in surprise, then she looked down with a small smile, "There's that big brain of yours, cutting right to the heart of it. No, I'm not pregnant, but it was…insanely close. You remember we had to stop because it was my last safe day?"

I nodded and then it clicked, "…And then we did it again four days later. Shit. I'm sorry Mira, I should've thought about it."

Mira shook her head, "No, it's my fault. I'm the one who started it. I…I'm sorry Jerry." She sat back, "I've, really been having a lot of fun with you. You're, probably the nicest guy I've ever met…and you're definitely the best in bed, but…" she sighed, "That's kind of scaring me too. We're going so fast and it's so easy, I, I could fall in love with you so easily, and…I don't think I'm wrong in guessing that you've already fallen for me."

I took a deep breath. My heart had started beating again, but for all that it was a normal beat, it didn't feel like a healthy one. Must've been the imminent heartbreak I could tell was coming, "I'd be a liar if I said you didn't have me from hello."

Mira grimaced, "Yeah, I know. It's, not that I don't feel the same way…I honestly do. I've just, got some baggage I need to work out. You might not even be back by the time I sort it out, but, this…this scared me. I know you love kids and probably would've come rushing back here to beg me to marry you if I had been pregnant, but I'm just not ready for that yet."

I nodded, "I would have. I understand."

Mira's startled eyes snapped up to meet mine, "You do?"

"There aren't many things that can stay hidden from me for long," I declared gently, "If you need time to sort out your feelings for your ex, then I'll be happy to give you as much as you need." I took a deep breath, "I hate pushy people who rush others into things, so the absolute last thing I want to do is make you feel pressured to make a decision, especially a hasty one. I don't like the thought of you choosing him over me, I think that goes without saying, but if that's what you decide, then I'll respect that."

Mira's eyes watered, "Y-you would?"

"Tell Laxus if you get back together with him that I'll freakin' kill him if he breaks your heart again, but other than that yeah," I replied dryly.

Mira's eyes went wide, "Who told you?!"

"Nobody. Erza tried to warn me off of hunting him down to kick his ass before I knew who he was," I explained, "She said that it was someone who I'd almost certainly lose against. I think she's underestimating me, but I've also never seen Laxus fight so I don't know. I knew it wasn't Mystogan, Gildarts or Master, and that only left Erza and Laxus. It definitely wasn't Erza, so logically it had to be Laxus. A few little tricks got them to inadvertently confirm it, and you just told me. Erza said he'd already be suffering if you wanted him to but that you had said there was nothing on his end to forgive and asked everybody to drop it."

Mira snorted a little half laugh, "There's not. It's my fault he broke up with me."

"May I ask what happened?" I asked gently.

Mira laughed lightly, "You're probably going to think it's silly. I wanted to have a threesome with Cana."

I blinked as my brain churned up, ERROR. DOES NOT COMPUTE. "Come again?"

Mira blushed, "Yeah, apparently he thought I meant a threesome with another guy and he flipped out and left. Not that that's not a hot idea, but I've never been able to tell him that's not what I meant. Honestly," she frowned, "After the way he acted, I'm not sure he deserves to know. If it weren't for what we'd had prior to that, I'd say to hell with him and would've probably said screw it on this month's jelly. He was hurt because he thought I was betraying him," she explained softly, "and he's probably still hurting. He was wonderful while we were together though, you're the first guy I've ever met who was even half as sweet as him that wasn't like a little brother to me, so I don't want to just let it end like that. I need to get some closure with him, and if…if it leads to us getting back together, I don't want you to just suddenly get blindsided by it when you get back."

I nodded, "I understand, thank you."

Mira laughed lightly, "Are you ever not sweet and understanding?"

"I was utterly horrible as a child," I replied flatly, "I've been trying to make up for it ever since."

Mira smiled, "Hmph, something else we have in common. Well, I guess it only makes sense." She sighed, "Okay, so here's what I'm thinking. We take six months off from each other regardless of when you get back, and then if we're still feeling this way on Valentine's Day, we'll get back together and let the dice fall where they may. I can definitely corner Laxus before then, so you take this six months to get any womanizing you might need to do taken care of, because if I decide you're mine, You. Are. MINE. I've already told Erza she can play with you as much as she wants because I know you're into her and she's tied with Cana for my first pick to share with. Just try not to get anyone pregnant, okay?"

I blinked in surprise, So she really DID say that?

"And Cana wants some attention too when you get back. I totally don't mind, I still want to have a threesome with her sometime." she added, "Oh and if you want to fool around with Lucy, you should probably do that too. I know you've been holding back with her."

"I'll probably actually hold off on Lucy anyway," I replied, "Erza and I found out on the way to meet the client that the entire Galuna Island stunt was Natsu's idea of taking Lucy on a date."

Silence reigned for a FULL minute and then, "WHAT?!" I spent about the next hour explaining everything that had happened since we left Magnolia, and then another twenty minutes for Mira to explain the situation to Erza and make sure that I didn't get brutally eviscerated for whatever I might get up to in the next six months.

…

…

That night was karaoke night in the ballroom. We were each given songs upon entry and told that if our number was called it was our turn. Natsu was nowhere to be found, but everyone else was present. Between Erza and Gajeel it was hard to tell who was more excited. If what happened next had been anyone but Levy's doing, I think they both would've been quite upset that they didn't get to sing at all that night.

When her number was called, Levy had had two drinks. TWO. She then proceeded to take the whole stage and the rest of the night was entirely hers. She absolutely owned every song they threw at her, no matter how off the wall it was. It hadn't occurred to me that she could use Transformation magic to alter her voice however she wanted, but the result was that she was able to sing in any key or tone she wanted. If Gajeel hadn't been crushing hard on her before that, he definitely was after that one hard rock number.

I might've paid more attention to their reactions, except Serena found me on Levy's third song and wanted to dance. Suffice to say that she was still every bit as good at it as she had been the night before, and the way she quietly sang along to any lines that she thought might be seductive only reinforced that.

After almost twenty minutes of dancing, Serena leaned in close while Levy got the band ready for the next song, "Want to get out of here?"

It took only a split second of consideration. The booze might've had something to do with it. "I'm unattached until at least Valentine's Day," I replied with a grin, "So for tonight at least, your wish is my command milady."

Serena's eyes widened with surprise and then faded into a seductive grin as she jerked her head towards the door, "You'll have to tell me about it. Come on, we'll be able to hear better on the deck." She tugged me towards the exit and I went along with my grin only spreading.

The upper deck was totally abandoned, but it was still lit by strings of lacrima lights here and there along with the light from the moon and stars overhead. Serena headed for the rail and propped against it to look out over the waves. I moved to stand next to her and she smiled over at me, "So, what's that you were saying about being suddenly unattached?"

I snorted lightly, "It's a little complicated." I took a second to think about it, "Basically Mira and I go together very well, but Mira's still got feelings for her ex which she wants time to sort out before she gets serious about our relationship. She told me point blank to sleep around and get any womanizing I might have in me out of my system over this next six months. She thinks there's a chance she'll get back together with her ex, so I think she's trying to make sure I've got something to fall back on if she does." I smiled, "She's thoughtful like that."

"And what about you?" Serena asked, "Are you thoughtful like that?"

I took a deep breath and let it out, "I try really hard to be, but no matter what anyone says, I'm not thoughtful enough."

"Oh?"

I leaned against the rail and shot a glance up at the stars, "I try hard to be nice. It's a mask that's all but grown to my face now, but I still don't like what's under it."

Serena reached out and scratched at my bandages with a teasing little grin, "So what is under here?"

"A lot less hair than I'm used to and some pretty good scratches, but they've healed enough that I'm just wearing this to keep my head warm," I admitted with a smile as I reached up and yanked the bandages loose and then off. I turned a smile on her and saw that her eyes had gone wide in shock. I knew it had left a hell of a mark, but I didn't think it was that bad, "Serena?"

Serena reached up to my face and traced a thumb over my eye where I was still scarred from the avalanche, "What happened here?" she asked quietly.

"I blew up a mountainside I was standing on by mistake," I answered simply, "I only got use of my right hand back a few days ago."

Serena gave me a politely disbelieving look, "A mountain. You blew up a mountain by mistake."

"Judging by the crater, it was only about ten percent of it," I admitted, "My Celestial Spirit partner is the only reason I survived. If she hadn't come through the gate on her own and blown a hole in the avalanche, or if she'd been even a second later, I would've been crushed like a bug. Is that a kraken?"

Serena's head snapped around to look at the tree trunk sized tentacle coming over the rail. I looked around and saw multiple similar tentacles slithering up, "Ohhh yeah, that's a kraken. Gimme a minute. I wanna try something before I call the others." I stepped over to one of the tentacles and raised a hand as I recalled Master Precht's words, Safety can induce sheer all-consuming panic, which can turn even the most disciplined armies into a catastrophic rout due to sheer terror. I charged my hand with what I judged to be almost ten percent of my full power and calmly ordered the tentacle, "RUN."

A blinding burst of light erupted from my hand and slammed into the tentacle. The tentacles froze immediately, and then nothing happened for a moment. A minute passed, then two, then the tentacles all but leapt off the sides of the ship and a massive wake suddenly ripped up through the waves as the kraken fled as fast as it could.

I grinned and almost glowed with pride as I laughed, "I just sent the Kraken packin'!" I gleefully fist pumped, "Oh man I'm gonna have so many good stories to tell when I get back!" I turned around and saw Serena giving me a very frightened look, "Serena?"

I noticed a faint tremble as she whispered, "Oh god you're serious…an ENTIRE MOUNTAIN?!" she demanded.

"No, a tenth of a mountain," I clarified before musing, "Although, I was a lot weaker when I did that… Ya know, I bet I could do a whole mountain now…"

"IS THAT SUPPOSED TO BE REASSURING?!"

I smiled, "Don't worry Serena, I actually have very good control. I did the mountain with a secondary magic that I was learning and I underestimated its strength. My primary magic isn't the 'blowing things up' kind of magic. Well, I mean it can be but that's an offshoot into the general area instead of my personal… You know what? You're still looking really scared and there's really no reason to be, so I have to wonder if I overdid it with the kraken and caught you in the back draft of my 'get scared and run away' spell?"

"Get scared and run away spell?" Serena echoed faintly.

I nodded, "That's literally all I did. My primary magic is mostly mental. I can make people happy or afraid, or hungry or sleepy, and I can make them not those things as well. I don't know why I'd want to inhibit the 'happy' feelings, but I probably could if I had to. The 'no sleepy' and 'no hungry' are much more obvious." I jerked my thumb in the direction the kraken had fled in, "That's the first time I've ever used the fear manipulation aspect."

"And you chased off a kraken with it," Serena declared, "What kind of monster wizard are you?!"

"I like to think I'd be a dragon," I told her with a gently teasing smile, "I don't know how or why I'm strong, I just count my blessings and try to help as best I can. I actually think I'm pretty weak as far as the 'monster' category goes. I'm sure any of the S-Class could trounce me if I didn't have absolutely everything leveraged in my favor, and even then, I'm sure they'd put up one hell of a fight." Serena still looked absolutely terrified.

I sighed, glanced at the ground and scratched my head, "Ehm…that's not helping you calm down at all is it? Erm…" I charged a hand with the intent of conveying a sense of safety and security. It glowed faintly and I extended it to her palm up, "If you'd like, this magic in my palm will help you calm down. It's not my happy-happy-happy! magic, but it should have a calming effect. I don't want to scare you, but I think I already have, so please," I smiled, "let me make that right."

Serena met my gaze for a moment and then tentatively reached out and touched her fingertips to the glow in my palm. All the tension went out of her immediately and I had to lunge forward to catch her as her knees gave out, "Serena!"

Ohshitshitshitshitshit! I panicked as I started trying to use the sixth sense of material awareness my telekinesis granted to check for a pulse. I blinked in surprise as I found her heart beat to be slow, steady and strong, then she wrapped her arms around me and set her head on my shoulder.

"I don't care what we do or don't do," she told me quietly, "Hold me tonight."

And there went MY pulse into boogedyboogedyboogedy! territory, "Come again?" I asked in as calm a voice as I could manage.

"I have chronic nightmares," she admitted softly, "My whole family does. It's a good night for me if I only wake up drenched in a cold sweat twice. I can't remember the last time I went a full night without a nightmare. Please, if you can let me sleep peacefully for even one night…I'll do anything. Money, my body, anything…just please, give me this."

My heart stopped hammering and just flat out stopped for a second in shock at what I was hearing. Then I gently hugged her to me, "No, I won't charge you anything. Of course I'll help you. I don't know much about enchantment, but my friend Levy knows a bit, and she's much more experienced with magic than I am. Between the two of us I'm sure we can make you something so that you won't have to have me every time you want to sleep. For right now though, let's get you to a bed. I promise I won't do anything but hold you tonight. Is that alright?"

Serena nodded and I gently picked her up in a bridal carry since she was still clinging to me like a life preserver, "Alright then, upsy daisy. You want to go to my room or yours?"

She told me quietly that it didn't matter, and I headed for my room since I didn't know where hers was. Before I had taken five steps, she was snoring softly in my arms.

…

…

The next morning Erza came to find me and let me know we'd made land. I was on the couch with Serena still asleep on my chest, so I motioned for Erza to not make too much noise. She stopped the instant she saw my face and froze like she'd seen a ghost. I could almost hear the gears screeching and grinding in her brain as she tried to comprehend the resemblance to my doppelganger. I'd been rather floored by it myself when I realized how strong the resemblance actually was, so for someone who had known him for so long, it wasn't surprising that she'd have a hard time with it. She came around the couch for a better look and I smiled, "Oh yeah, forgot this is the first time you've seen me without my face all bandaged up."

"I know Mira said you looked like him…" Erza said quietly, her eyes still locked on my face, "But this is insane…"

"Not really," I replied, "According to Mystogan, everybody's got a pretty exact double in the parallel world he's from called Edolas. I've already seen evidence of the same being true in my world since Gajeel and Juvia are all but carbon copies of my best friends back home. There are some key personality differences according to Mystogan, and I think I'm starting to cotton on to them. Like Gajeel being kinda antisocial as opposed to Gabe who's Mr. Popular back home. I haven't been around Juvia enough to spot the differences between her and Julie yet, but off hand I'm gonna guess it's the way Juvia acts all shy and emotionless at first." I snorted with a small grin, "You couldn't make Julie do 'shy' if you paid her."

"I guess you've already heard about your counterpart here then. Have you met him yet?" Erza mused quietly, "What are the differences between you and him?"

"Offhand, I'd say that I'm not as much of an out-and-out dick," I replied with a small wry grin, "Other than that, I don't really know much about him other than the stuff that everybody knows, so I couldn't say."

"And, you're an evil genius, right?" Erza asked warily.

I sighed, "Erza are you still worried about that? I'm not evil! I'm too logical for that crap."

"What's logic got to do with it?" Erza asked as she slumped back on the couch, and was that bitterness in her tone?

"Don't be bitter Erza it doesn't suit you in the slightest," I told her bluntly. Erza flinched in surprise and I nodded, "As for the illogicality of evil, think about it. If you're evil, then nobody trusts you. Even the people who should trust you or you really want to trust you, won't because they know you're evil. If you're evil, then everyone will constantly be trying to hunt you down and thwart your plans. Everything becomes infinitely more difficult if you're evil or even just have a reputation for it. That and you have to either completely shut down all empathy for other people or become an out and out sadist. Only a fool or a monster could willingly be evil," I declared quietly, "There are those who get forced or tricked into doing evil things, but that's different. There are people like me who can get inside the minds of those who are evil and figure out their motives, goals and methods. That doesn't make either party evil, just different. No matter how much I joke about it, or how hard I beat myself up over that mistake that's tormented me ever since, I'm not evil. Never could be. Evil pisses me off too much."

Erza was quiet for a moment and then, "Well when you put it like that, I guess I'll just have to trust you."

I growled, "What, do you wanna look through my memories or something?"

Erza flinched and looked at me in surprise, "You would, let me do that?"

"Will it make you stop looking at me like I'm a bomb?"

Erza glanced towards the door, then she glanced at Serena and her nervousness was very obvious, "Is…isn't that kind of…insanely private? Not that I'm not flattered that you would trust me that much, and it would be very reassuring since that level of strength in evil hands would be nothing short of terrifying, but…"

I extended a hand with a bit of glow in my palm, "I don't have to show you everything, and you won't need to see much. Just my feelings about the closest thing to an evil act I've ever committed should be enough for you to understand exactly why I couldn't be evil if I wanted to."

Erza requipped her gauntlet off and tentatively reached out to touch my palm before flinching back at the last second, "This isn't going to make me vomit like you did is it?"

"It shouldn't," I answered. Erza nodded and took my hand. From the look of immediate pain that twisted her face and the way she suddenly clamped down on my hand with enough force that I'm certain it would've broken if I'd still been at one percent, I'd say she was getting the full blast of it. Then that awful memory erupted into the forefront of my mind and I realized what was happening. Erza must've caught a glimpse of it and now she was actively ripping the context for my feelings out of the depths of my mind. I hadn't realized it would rattle her that badly, but…I allowed the memories to flow. There'd be no doubt for anyone who saw them that there was no way I could be evil. I was slightly confused when she started digging through every scrap of information leading up to that most horrible day of my life, but I wasn't going to stop her. Erza's thorough and doesn't half-ass anything, so her determination to learn the whole story didn't surprise me.

A few minutes later, the memories stopped and Erza sat back. Going by the ragged breathing and the 'ghostly pale drenched in sweat because I just came out of a horrible nightmare' face she had on, I'd say her heart was hammering and that it had hit her just as hard as still hit me. It made sense, it wasn't the sort of thing any decent person could learn of, let alone experience, without being absolutely horrified. With Archive having rendered all my memories crystal clear, there was no doubt in my mind that she'd felt every emotion I had that day. That said though…

I sat up as much and quick as I could, reaching out to catch her hand back and flood her with 'Sense of Security' (as I had decided to dub it). Nobody should have to suffer like that.

Erza's trembling immediately stilled and the color started to come back to her face. "Are you alright Erza?"

Erza took a deep unsteady breath and then nodded. She was quiet for a moment and then, "I believe you. Those aren't the memories or feelings of an evil person." She got her poker face back on quick and stood up to leave, "We've made port at Puerta Samba, so if you want to see it then you should probably get a move on. If you're not too preoccupied of course," she added with a grin.

She left and closed the door behind her. The instant the door clicked closed, Serena opened her eyes and sat up, easily straddling me as she pushed me back down onto the couch with a grin, "You're preoccupied." And then I was!

That being said, I'll have to write this next chapter from third person because it bears recounting, but I heard about this next bit from the others.

...

...

NEXT TIME on Mad Little Slice of Heaven...

...

Erza paused as someone called, "Hey, are you Erza Scarlet?!" She turned and found herself confronted with a young woman with snow white hair, piercing green eyes and an extremely pretty face marred by two admittedly very impressive scars over her right eye and left cheek. She had on a black leather jacket over a matching leotard and boots, with what looked like an awful lot of long knives in sheaths at her waist.

"Yes I am," Erza replied cautiously, that grin was way too similar to Natsu looking for a fight, "But you have the advantage of me. What may I call you?"

"No need to be formal Erza," the white-haired girl replied, "You can call me Jack. I want to fight you.