Chapter 4

FROM A DISTANT coast I could see the woman of my life. If only it could have cheated the weather. If I could just say that it would be easy then everything would be fine and I could marry her. But ... time is deceitful, opportunity is deceitful. When you love you think it's that easy to love you back. Maybe others think that when you do everything it's easy, it's easy for you to get everything in your hands ... but it's not really. You still have to sacrifice for the sake of the person you love.

"Erdem, why are you here?" I rubbed my foot on the sand while sitting.

"Breathing the breeze." I replied to Thania.

"Ah, Bebsie?" With the snout I pointed not far away. "That's why you're only here because you're watching over the dear Princess who lost her memory," she said to me, "It's like I'm just reading a romantic love story because of your situation."

"Just story without romantic love." I was pushed reason to lie down on the white sand.

"Someday you can also say that Bebsie has a romantic love story for you." She sighed as if releasing bait from his chest.

"If that someday comes, can it be just now?"

"Repentance is always late so someday it will be in line with repentance as well."

"Hmm, Thania."

"Why?"

"How are you and your boyfriend?"

"Hey, we're gone."

"Why?" I wake up.

"I don't think I have a male destiny, maybe a woman is destined for me." His loud laugh made me smile.

"It's just there."

"If I'm just here why can't I see you? Why am I still struggling to find?"

"Don't look if it's just somewhere. Sometimes we think we are blind because the eyes are used to find love but the truth is the heart must be applied. Hearts feel good. The heart will give the right path to the right person to love. "

"Do you deserve a heart? Eh why can't I even feel anything other than my past feelings? Why is the heart sometimes deceitful without even letting me know the truth."

"He lets us feel it. Gosh, wake up Thania, don't listen to the song just dreaming of you." It was a frustrating look at the expanse of the sea.

After a while I sighed again. If I only knew what was on his mind I might be able to sympathize with her.

"Do you believe, Erdem?"

"Where?"

"In the dream."

"You mean, dream like that?"

"Yeah, do you sometimes dream and then come true?"

"Uhm, it looks like nothing yet." My hand is on the sinuses. "Because I've been there many times."

"What are those?"

"Secretly cruel."

"Your deceit."

"As long as the dream happened so many times as long as I don't tell."

"Nonsense," I laughed, "What if someone died in your dream, you wouldn't just let that happen?" She was stunned by what I said and then averted his eyes when I began to approach.

"Did you admit that someone died in your dream?"

"Did I think a dream was just bullshit for you?"

"Just making sure,"

"No, there's never been such a scenario in my dream." It would be nice if I didn't feel guilty.

Why do I say this and then what she says will make the dream come true is not true. And if it does happen, it’s probably just coincidence.

AT THE SEA we had dinner but because Bebsie was having a headache we entered the room early. They only took one room for us, incase something went wrong with Bebsie's condition.

"It's two beds if you remember." Earlier I noticed that I was restless in bed.

"It's not like that, eh." Sus, Bebsie. Even if you have amnesia I know you still have that habit. You are very conscious when it comes to virginity.

"I'm going to sleep." I am a window sill. Cedric's place is visible here but I closed it so I could have peace of mind. They might think we have something to do with it.

After ten o'clock in the evening I woke up to get some air. I will not fall asleep. Also, I'm thinking about my next plans especially now that Rust has a chance to go home because it's okay when I leave the hospital. I stumbled on the sand and meditated. The noise of the ocean was so pleasant to the ear that it seemed to give me comfort. Peace of mind.

"Where's Bebsie? Why are you still awake?" REIGN.

"She's already asleep. I can't sleep yet. Why are you still awake?"

"I put the naughty kids to sleep first, eh. Do you have a problem?"

"Just confused,"

"Where?" Also crashed into sitting.

"I never knew I would, Reign." I am sad to complain.

"Tell me, what's bothering your heart and bothering your mind?"

"I lied, I said-- we had a relationship even though she actually broke up that day." Bowed in embarrassment. When it comes to Reign, it's hard to tell her, especially if you're telling a lie.

"I mean ... you're gone, why?"

"A man with her in the car accident, the man he traded for me."

"Are you sure? Bebsie and I have been friends for a long time but she doesn't tell me anything about ---"

"She doesn't want you to get mad at her, and that's the truth."

"The man dying in the hospital is the man ... no, that's impossible."

"He's fine. He's in good shape and that's also why it's scary when he returns to Beb's life."

"You lied to her because of your love. What else do we not know about you two ??"

"She left me. She traded me for another man and out of love I made her lie to me and made me believe we still had a relationship even without it." I can't help but choke.

"That's called love, Erdem. You loved a woman you didn't fight until the end. I don't know anything when it comes to your love story but I hope the reason for your every decision wasn't bad. How long will you keep the truth? What if she suddenly realized that you weren't the man he wanted to be with in life? How about that, she'll just leave it without saying goodbye because it's bad for you. You need to think about the plan before you act. "

"Because nothing enters my brain but her back. Am I bad, Reign? Is it bad to expect another Bebsie to come back into my life?" My tears are flowing.

"What should you do to end this problem of yours? Do you want to marry her until she remembers the past so that she will have nothing in your life? In the end, it's up to you to make yourself happy because someone else is in her heart. "

"I just want ... to return to how she used to feel for me."

"My friend, Erdem. I won't tolerate your mistake. I just don't want you to be the loser in the end. You want to go back to the way she used to feel for you but do you have any thoughts? If you're having a hard time forgetting what you've been through, she's still there that you will try to forget her new loved one. You always look at the situation around you, not always on your own. You will be happy but someone else is hurting. Always look around, Erdem. "

Always look around ...

Always look around ...

Reign is right. What good is one's own happiness if someone else is hurt. I think it's better for me to be hurt myself and at least I can handle the pain.

"Reign, Erdem, what are you doing there?" Cedric.

"Don't mention him first." I'm simply whispering here. She nodded before approaching the husband.

"Go to sleep, Erdem." Reign said last as Cedric led him to their room.

"You want sleeping pills?" Tossed me the can of beer. He sat down nearby then opened his beer holder.

"What are you two talking about?"

"Just about the vacation made on Guam."

"It looks fun, doesn't it? Oh, sorry. I forgot, it was Bebsie's accident. What did her doctor say will your girlfriend's memory come back?"

"Just temporary amnesia, nothing to worry about."

"You look like for the rest of your life you'll be reminded of the past," after getting serious suddenly laughed mixed with a grin, "You can handle that, Erdem. Remember you're the smartest of lucifer."

"The wise man becomes foolish in love."

"But there's no problem, is there?" I choked after drinking beer,

"Oh slowly, maybe she forbids you to drink when you're together, what?" Shake head I watched him drink beer,

"Now that she has amnesia a Bebsie doesn't care what's going on." We laughed together.

"It's not fun. Just think you're single now and then you can do everything you want." I'm really single, Cedric. And honestly, I am free to do everything but this heart of mine does not want to cooperate.

"Master, what if you're in my situation."

"Does Reign have amnesia?" Laugh before drinking beer,

"HAHA I'll be free." I was stunned by his attitude, "Crazy, you're serious." Against it in my head.

"Will you remind her of what she forgot or will you just let her be with you so that everyone can come back automatically?" He was staring at me seriously.

"What else am I going to do to remind everyone? I already have a child with her. Maybe she won't think that I'm a cheater to pretend to be his husband."

"As a matter of fact, you're holding on to as much proof."

"The only thing you can prove in today's situation is your true attitude. Even if the mind forgets, the heart is still here to remember and follow the right path." Point it at the chest. But something else is in his heart and I am no longer.

"Do you have any other problems besides losing his memory?"

"Gone." It stood up and patted my shoulder,

"Go to sleep. You can't enjoy the sea, and swimming pool if you're awake." I was completely left alone. Eventually I entered because the wind was getting stronger.