OF A DRAGON AND THAT OF LOVE

I rubbed Sara's back while she cried. Azaan's whole immediate

family was here. His dad too. Malik hadn't returned back from

where he went. Azaan was currently undergoing a CT scan.

According to George the fever was a fungal infection and she

had specifically termed it as Aspiration Pneumonia and if left

untreated this could progress to a lung abscess.

George came out of the room looking exhausted. Azaan's dad

looked at her expectantly.

"I think he might need to undergo a Thoracentesis." she

sighed.

"Not everyone here speaks medical language so would you

care to elaborate, doctor?" Azaan's dad Mr. Ibrahim Ahmed

spat.

George looked at him incredulously before gaining her

composure back.

"It is a procedure to remove the excess fluid from the space

between a person's lungs and chest wall. It is a very simple

procedure. Just takes 10 to 15 minutes."

"Alright. Get it started. I will fulfill all of the formalities." he

nodded and walked away.

I sighed and sat down.

I needed...

Daniyal.

Yes, I needed him.

I left him a message.

I still couldn't stomach the fact that he fell so sick. He was just

doing fine a few days ago. I was hurting.

"George, please tell me he will be alright." I held her arm as

she began to walk away.

"Of course. This is nothing."

I nodded.

20 minutes later the surgery we all went to meet him.

He looked exhausted. He was still under the effect of general

anesthesia.

"Dad." he whimpered.

Mr. Ibrahim walked up to him and ran his hand over his

forehead. I stood a little far giving privacy to the family.

"I want a dragon." he whimpered like a kid.

I giggled lightly.

"Later, my son. Later." Mr., Ibrahim smiled and pecked his

forehead.

Something pricked inside me.

The want to peck his forehead gently.

I shook my head and walked up to him when I saw his dad

moving away.

One by one everyone left the room except for his dad.

"I hear you are his friend. Right?" he spoke blankly.

I nodded dumbly.

He didn't say anything.

"Do you want something, Mr. Ahmed? Like a coffee or tea?" I

asked timidly.

"No, thanks." he nodded and walked out.

I glanced at Azaan.

I smiled and leaned down to peck his forehead gently. Feeling

scared and excited I backed out.

"Dragon." he whimpered and smiled.

"What?" I whispered.

"I want a dragon, Momi."

"Momi?" I asked myself.

"Oh, you mean mommy. It's mommy." I patted his cheek.

"Romi." he giggled.

Aftermath of Anesthesia? I thought.

"You want a dragon?" I giggled lightly and sat beside him. His

head of the bed was elevated to 45 degrees.

"But it doesn't exist." I argued.

"It does." he giggled.

"Where?"

"Here." he placed his palm on his chest.

"No, silly. There exists your heart." I removed his hand.

"No, it does." he frowned.

"Give me evidence that it exists?" I laughed.

"It just does."

"Romi." he hiccupped.

"Water?" I handed him and he sipped from it.

"It doesn't taste good." he muttered.

"You have a particular taste in your water too?" I laughed

again.

"No." he pushed the glass back.

He looked up at me. His eyes tired and heavy.

"Romi." he stuck a strand of my bangs behind my ear.

"Go to sleep." I smiled and leaned back but he adjusted

himself and leaned down and rested his head on my chest.

I froze.

"Azaan." I muttered quietly and tried to push him away but he

tightened his hold on my back.

"Azaan." he whispered.

"Yes, that's you." I muttered and pushed him back but he

wouldn't budge.

Finally, I gave up and wrapped my arms around him.

He was so huge. But, cuddling with him felt so good.

"Romi." he whimpered.

"It's Romaisa for you." I sang.

"Romaisa." he giggled.

"Azaan." I whispered quietly.

"My chest hurts." he whimpered painfully.

"I'll call a doctor." I tried to push him.

"Please."

"What's wrong, sweetheart?" I whispered and patted his

cheek.

Did I just call him the same endearment that he calls me with?

Yes, I did.

The door of his ward opened and I saw Daniyal and George

walk in.

"Azaan." I tried to push him but no avail.

"Sorry, guys. He is asleep I guess." I laughed nervously.

"Romi, please come here." Daniyal tried to pull me away from

his hold. I didn't want this so I didn't try hard to pull away but

eventually Azaan let go of me and collapsed back on the bed.

"Have you lost your mind, Romi?" Daniyal almost yelled in

frustration as he dragged me out of the hospital.

"What happened?" I asked him meekly.

"Why would you go so close to him? He has Pneumonia." he

yelled this time.

I flinched.

"No." I shook my head.

"He has fungal Pneumonia. It isn't contagious. I confirmed

this with George."

He sighed.

"But, still. Precaution is better than cure." he sat down on one

of the benches.

"Let's get you back home." he got up taking my hand in his

and we walked to his car.

"Daniyal." I called out to him.

"Hmm..."

"Remember you told me figuring out love is easy? How would

you know that it's not just fascination and that it is love?" I

spoke absentmindedly as I toyed with my necklace.

"It's simple."

"I know that already. Tell me how to do it."

"Firstly, what according to you is love exactly?"

"I.... Um.... Honestly, I don't know."

He chuckled deeply.

"It is a deep and painful feeling."

I looked at him suspiciously.

"Careful there, Daniyal. You sound like you're in love."

"No. Unfortunately not." he laughed.

"So, how does it feel like?"

"I don't know." I shrugged.

"It feels like happiness. Like that person makes you happy." he

began.

"You make me happy, Romi." his voice rang in my ears. The

image of that bracelet flashed in front of me.

"It feels beautiful. Like the moments spent with that person

are beautiful."

The memories of every moment that we spent together flashed

before my eyes and I felt myself going numb.

"It feels..." he started but I cut him off.

"It feels familiar. Like you have known that person for a long

time now. It feels odd and overwhelming. Like you have never

met such a person before and those feelings are very

overwhelming. It feels like everlasting. Like it would last

forever. It feels like you would do anything for that person.

"You feel..."

"Woah, Romi. Relax. I thought you said you didn't know." he

cut me off.

I looked out of the window.

I felt scared.

I never knew I could say all these things. I didn't even know

what to say a minute ago. Something in me had talked. It

wasn't me. Those were my feelings. It was my very

treacherous heart.

It hurt actually.

Growing up I never believed in all of this. Sure, I believed in

love and soul mates. I had seen my parents. But I always

thought I would never feel it. Simply because I always

struggled with my emotions. I wasn't emotionally attached to

anyone other than my immediate family and George. It wasn't

like I didn't want to. I couldn't.

But, today. I had lost or I had won. I didn't know.

Azaan was a friend. Someone I met a month ago. Someone

about whom I didn't know much but, somehow being with

him felt so familiar. Someone I had blindly trusted. Someone I

felt really happy with. These thoughts or feelings were making

me restless.

I gently rubbed my chest where my heart was.

I could actually feel something stir in it.

"Water." I whispered.

Daniyal handed me a bottle and I drank it all.

"Can I ask you something Daniyal?"

"Yeah?"

"What do you do then?"

"Huh?"

"What do you do when you figure things out?"

"You admit it." he shrugged.

I turned to him.

"To whom?"

He looked at incredulously.

"You're outrageous Romi."

"To him. You idiot." he chuckled.

I looked away again.

"To Azaan."

I looked at him horrified.

"Why would you say his name?" I muttered.

"Do you think I'm stupid or blind?"

I shook my head.

"Everyone who knows you knows about it."

"They do?" I asked worriedly.

"They must." he slammed his hand on the steering wheel.

I flinched.

"I am sorry. I meant they should have known by now."

"But I didn't tell anyone." I shook my head.

"You're so innocent, Romi." he chuckled.

"You don't need to say anything. They should have known by

the way you as much as glance at him."

"What? No, you're being too much."

"What? Have you seen yourself with him?" he looked shocked.

"How can I see myself, Daniyal?"

He clicked his tongue.

"I meant if you see yourself when you're with him you would

know."

"But..."

"Relax."

"Just go and admit it to him. I am sure he feels the same."

"He always tells me that I am his friend. What if...?"

"Listen, I don't know him much. Nor have I seen him with you

to understand whether he feels the same way or not but you

need to admit it to him. That's the only way to know." he

shrugged.

"How?"

He sighed deeply.

"Gosh. Romi. Why must you be so clueless?"

"How am I supposed to know? This is my first time." I

whined.

"Just go and tell him. It doesn't have to be a lavish proposal or

something. Juts grab a bouquet, wear your best dress and go

to him." he stated irritated.

"Yeah." I smiled.

"But..." I began.

He sighed.

"Now what?"

"The last time I gave him a bouquet it ended up on the floor."

"What? He threw your bouquet away?"

"No, I..."

"I knew it. I just knew it. He's a jerk. You know what? Forget

about him. I'll..." I cut him off.

"No, wait. You didn't let me finish. I was going to say that he

didn't accept it so I threw it on the floor angrily."

"Why didn't he accept it?"

"Because, I didn't accept his gift."

"Why didn't you accept his gift?"

"Because, he was engaged."

"What? He's engaged. I knew it. He's a jerk. For god's sake

stop it, Romi. You can find a better guy."

"Daniyal." I yelled loudly.

Silence enveloped us for a few seconds.

"You're not letting me complete my sentences."

"Now you will stay quiet. Speak up only when I tell you to. Am

I clear?"

He didn't reply.

"Am I clear?"

"Crystal." he whispered.

"I was going to say that I didn't know he broke his

engagement months ago when I refused to take his gift. I

thought he was engaged. Later, I found out that he had ended

things with his fiancée months ago."

I took a deep breath and looked at him. He was driving quietly

looking ahead.

I stifled a laugh.

"You can speak up now."

He didn't say anything.

"Hey." I smacked his arm.

He didn't reply.

"Hey." I pulled his cheek but he swatted my arm away.

"Hey." I laughed and pulled his cheek. He pouted and swatted

my hand again.

"Fine. I am so sorry." I patted his shoulder.

We arrived back and I immediately changed into some comfy

Pj's. I wanted to tell everyone about my realization. It was a

happy moment for me. I felt like a real maniac.

I smiled to myself and walked in the living room. Daddy and

Daniyal were watching a movie. Hamza wasn't present and

Mama was probably arranging dinner.

"Mama." I yelled excitedly.

"Remember my friend Azaan?" as soon as I said that everyone

turned their heads towards me. Their expressions shocked

and scared. Even Daniyal seemed shocked it was perhaps due

to the fact that he hadn't expected me to blurt out things in

front of everyone.

Daddy smiled nervously. Mama came out of the kitchen with a

spatula in her hands.

"Yeah?" Daddy drawled.

"Well, I am inviting him for a brunch sometime next week.

What do you say?"

"Why next week? Tomorrow should be just fine." Mama

smiled excitedly.

"The house is pretty clean. If he comes next week then I'll

have to get the house cleaned again. Moreover, my Mango

package has just arrived I could wear one of the dresses for

tomorrow." she beamed.

I looked back at Dad who looked utterly tired and Daniyal

who nodded in affirmation at her.

"Are you worried because you have nothing to wear? Oh,

sweetie my package has a lot of dresses for you to choose

from."

I walked up to her and placed my arms around her shoulders

"Calm down, Mama. I am not worried for an outfit. I have just

delayed it because he's sick and hospitalized."

"Sick and hospitalized? What happened?" her eyebrows

furrowed together.

"He has Pneumonia." I looked down suddenly feeling upset.

"Pneumonia? And, where are you coming from?" she asked

carefully.

"From the hospital. He was under the effect of Anesthesia.

Muttering some crazy things." I smiled remembering him

express his desire of wanting a dragon.

Mama moved away from me.

"What's wrong?" I frowned.

"Ali, I think your daughter has gone crazy for that boy. Look at

her. She is contracting germs of a viral deadly fever from him

and coming back home to infect us." she walked over to dad.

"But, Mama...." I followed her.

"Move away, Nafeesa. I didn't go near her, you did. And, now

you want to infect me too." he pushed her away.

Mama looked like she had been betrayed.

Daniyal stifled a laugh.

I chuckled realizing Daddy was pranking her.

"Actually, I went there with Romi too, Mama." Daniyal

shrugged innocently.

She looked terrified now. Then her lips began trembling and

before we could understand what happened she burst into

sobs and sat down.

We all tried to walk in her direction.

"Stay away." she motioned with her hands.

"Mama..." me and Daniyal whispered quietly.

"Nafee I was just joking." Daddy walked towards her.

"Is this the day I have raised you for? Huh? For you to bring

home the germs of a fever that is contagious?" she sobbed.

"Mama, he has a fungal infection which isn't contagious. Stop

crying, will you?" I sighed irritated and sat down.

"Oh..." she drawled then quickly wiped her tears and plastered

a smile on her face.

"So, are you all free on next week? Sunday?"

"Yeah." everyone nodded in affirmation.

"Romi, come here." Daddy called me.

"Yes." I sat down with him. Mama walked back to the kitchen

and Daniyal attended one of his calls.

"Romi, do you like him?" he asked carefully.

I felt shy and awkward for a second. Hesitation began to crawl

up my veins. Nevertheless, I smiled.

"Yes, daddy."

"Does he like you too?"

"I..." I looked around trying to find words.

"He says things and gives me those looks sometimes. At other

times he addresses me as his friend. But he always says that I

make him happy. I am not sure but, I think..." I sighed.

"It's alright." he wrapped his arm around my shoulders.

"Can I give you a precious advice, Romi?" he smiled.

"Yes, daddy."

"Your priority should always be yourself first. I know that

sounds selfish but, trust me it keeps you or anyone from

hurting yourself. Remember your morals and principles and

do not let anyone or anything crumble them. And, listen don't

be over- confident and think that he must like you. You should

be okay if he doesn't like you back." at this I looked at him

suddenly feeling scared.

"If you love something really badly you let it go. If it is meant

for you, it will always come back to you." I smiled sadly.

I nodded feeling light from the burden of my feelings. I

understood something that moment.

Love was not your strength. It could be your weakness too.

You could not choose to make it one of them. It all depends on

the circumstances.

I opened my closet and narrowed my eyes. This was the first

time that I was confused about my clothes. I ran my hands

through few of my dresses. My clothes were divided into 2

sections. Dresses and casual clothes. I had always opted for

the second section. Wearing dresses was rare. A blue floral

knee length dress caught my sight. I held it against myself in

front of the mirror.

Nah too dull.

Another floral frock caught my sight. Red and pink flowers. I

held it against myself.

Nah too pretty.

A lacy lavender frock caught my sight and I heard myself

uttering one word.

Perfect.

December 4, 2019

Azaan and I shared our very first hug today.

I know I sound crazy but it is what it is, right?

I think I like him.

I love him actually.

It's undeniable, I can't deny it now.

Thank heavens for Daniyal, he is a blessing.

I am calling him over for lunch sometime next week.

Mama is pretty excited.

I am a little scared for Hamza's reaction.

I want to confess my feelings. I don't know how.

Daniyal says it's simple.

How do I tell him?

It gets a little difficult to talk when he's around. How do I tell

him about my feelings.

Most importantly will he reciprocate them?

What will I do if he doesn't?

What will I do if he does?

Will I marry him?

Probably yes.

Should I tell him tomorrow?

Probably yes.

What will I say?

Something cliché like. You're the one that I think about before

I fall asleep.

Nah. He will probably laugh.

I need something that makes him feel emotional.

Should I google? Or ask Daniyal? Nah, he is already

annoyed.

George must know. Nah, she's asleep.

Should I ask daddy?

Yeah, perfect.