1 Chapter 1: Torrential Criticism
Traversing is a straightforward thing.
For example, Lu Yu witnessed the Herrscher of the Void at four o'clock in the morning, chased after a supply, and struggled through the Abyss chapters. As a result, he was sent to Longsky City by a kind truck driver during breakfast the next day.
He had traversed!
As an avid fan, Lu Yu knew that Schicksal City was where the dream began, the starting point of the Honkai story. Could it be that his life in this world would set sail from here?
[Simulator Binding Successful]
[Welcome to use the "Gentleman Simulator"]
[This simulator will absolutely not affect reality. Please act as a gentleman in the simulation.]
[After each simulation, the audience will rate the performance, and you, as the host, will receive some points as a reward.]
[The rewards can be exchanged for various items in the store.]
[Note: Experience your unique life in the simulator!]
Lu Yu: "..."
The Gentleman Simulator? Just the name sounds untrustworthy. Before traversing, I, Lu Yu, was already a good person – honest, never littering. This simulator is nothing but trouble!
[First simulation about to start, please prepare.]
[Countdown: 5 4 3 2 1]
"Hey, wait! I have some questions. Can't you slow down?"
[Practice makes perfect. Seek the answers you desire in the simulation.]
[Talent selection phase: Each simulation will randomly present 1-6 talents of varying qualities. The host can choose 1-3 of them.]
[1 Not lascivious (1 star): You are color-blind]
[2 Frail physique (1 star): Your vitality may be less than that of a cricket]
[3 Silver tongue (2 stars): You are a liar]
[4 Strong physique (3 stars): You can take down a tiger with a single tackle]
[5 Tragic life (2 stars): Your life is not so beautiful, but you can unexpectedly win people's hearts]
What kind of starting point is this? Lu Yu had played simulators before, but starting like this was a first.
"I'll choose the last three."
[Simulation officially begins. (Note: Newbie tip, the host's abilities are currently too low, judging by the existing attributes and chosen talents, this simulation will likely have a comical ending!)]
[Age 1: You were born into an ordinary family.]
Not bad, a normal start.
[Age 3: You had a robust body from a young age, and your parents were very happy about it.]
Lu Yu guessed that this should be the effect of the 3-star talent. Unlike the two negative effects of the 2-star talents, the 3-star talent was purely positive.
[Age 7: Your family was attacked by Honkai beasts and Deadwalkers. Your strong vitality allowed you to survive, but your powerful life force aroused the curiosity of scientists, and you were taken to a research institute.] (Tragic life talent activated)
[Age 9: You realized that the scientists in the institute were all madmen conducting cruel and inhumane research and experiments.]
[Age 10: The children locked up with you gradually disappeared.]
[Age 11: Sensing the danger, you began to think about how to escape.]
[Age 11: You quickly locked onto a middle-aged female scientist.]
[Age 13: Through sweet-talking, you gained her trust, and she promised to find a chance to help you escape.] (Silver tongue talent activated)
[Age 13: You finally got a chance to escape. The white-haired girl locked up with you pleaded with you to take her along. What's your choice?]
[Agree to take her along: Alright, then come with me.]
[Refuse her request: I already have a rich lady; I don't need love anymore!]
Damn!
What kind of rubbish simulator is this?
Starting with this? And why specifically a middle-aged woman? Aren't there any beautiful girls in the institute?
Lu Yu considered the two options. Since he could win people's hearts, he shouldn't encounter any problems with this middle-aged woman. Besides, the white-haired girl was offering herself; naturally, he should choose to take her along.
"I choose to take her along."
[Age 13: You agreed to the white-haired girl's request and told her that from now on, she is under your protection.]
"Could you stop adding drama? I just want to lead her out of misery!"
[Age 13: After you and the white-haired girl escaped, the middle-aged woman invited you to stay at her home. Will you accept her invitation?]
[Accept the woman's request: Auntie, I don't want to make any more effort. You desire to experience the joy ball brought by being a rich lady, right?]
[Refuse the woman's request: You think you can try harder.]
"Why even choose? Of course, I'll refuse! I'm only 13, and I still have a bright future!"
[Age 14: You and the white-haired girl managed to escape the research institute. You were penniless and had no skills. After leaving the middle-aged woman's sight, you began finding ways to earn money.]
[Age 15: You planned to coax the white-haired girl into working and then use her earnings to indulge in luxury.]
[Age 16: The girl obeyed your orders without question. You led her out of that hellish research institute, and she followed your every command. Whatever you asked of her, she would agree.]
[Age 18: You became a leech. The girl awakened some power, and she found a labor-intensive job. The girl was bullied by others at work, but you never cared about her; instead, you thought she earned too little.]
Lu Yu, who had deeply realized that this simulator was abnormal, couldn't be bothered to complain anymore. He just wanted to see what new tricks this ghost simulator would pull on him next.
[Age 19: You confessed to several outstanding girls, trying to freeload off them, but they all rejected you. Your silver tongue was easily seen through by their extensive knowledge.]
[Age 20: However, you still found an opportunity and tricked a girl into falling for you.] (Silver tongue talent activated)
[Age 21: The girl you deceived turned out to be a princess from a wealthy conglomerate. Her father found you and gave you a good beating, warning you not to approach his little princess again.]
[Age 21: Angry, you returned to your rented room and smashed everything to pieces. The white-haired girl tried to comfort you, but you refused and decided to go out for a drink.]
[Age 22: You knew very well that you were a scum. However, your meager moral bottom line told you that you couldn't harm the white-haired girl; she had followed you out of that hell, and you couldn't push her back in.]
[Age 23: Ignoring advice, you made a move on the rich girl once again. This time, the girl's father didn't let you go, and you were stuffed into a sack and thrown into the Nagazora City River.]
[Age of death: 23 years old]
[Cause of death: Picking fights with yourself. The fish in the Nagazora City River died of laughter.]
Damn, this simulator is so messed up.
However, it's just a simulation for fun. But seriously, this is way too crazy, right?
Where is the gentleman simulator? It's clearly a clown simulator!
[Simulation Ended]
[This simulation is complete. The audience will now rate your performance. Please wait.]
[Rating complete. The maximum score is 100, and you, the host, scored 28, earning the system's evaluation: "Torrential Criticism."]
[Audience feedback: You're not even as good as a cricket. Next time, it's suggested to choose talent number 2.]
[You have received 5 points as a reward. Please check.]
[Please note that an audience member has sent you a fine gift to express gratitude for the wonderful life you provided.]
[Gift: Smelly Socks received. Please check.]
Looking at the crappy result of the first simulation, Lu Yu fell into deep thought. Should he have chosen to go through his simulated life with that middle-aged woman after all?
Indeed, Kiana would have been a better choice!
Anyway, this is just a simulation. Choose what you like – Kiana during the day and Raiden at night – why not?
Even if I, Lu Yu, were to die today, fed to the fish in the City River by Raiden's orders, I still wouldn't want to play the joy ball with that middle-aged woman!
This... just isn't appealing!
