On the road

John and his group of hob goblins were walking, they were chatting amongst themselves, some would try to talk to john but he would just grunt back, they got the message

"the leader doesn't like to be talked to when he walks" they thought

John was actually thinking about what to do next, he needed to find some more minions to add, he needed a place to set his dungeon, he needed to find actual humans too, he needed to do many things and yet he didn't know where to start. As he was walking there were shouts coming from up ahead, there was another group of goblins and a hob goblin blocking the path

"this is our road pay the toll or pay with your life"

"yeah you heard the boss pay the toll or die"

There were a group of goblins ahead and a hob goblin standing in the way

"why should we pay, this is a public road"

"public road, we are in a freaking forest who says this is a public road, what are you humans or something"

John walked past his minions to get a good look at the new group, he looked at them up and down and was disappointed. He shook his head looked at his group and told them to handle it, all his hobs looked at him and grinned and started attacking, the two groups were going at it like crazy

"what's taking so long" he thought

"there's 20 hob goblins against a group of goblins and yet they're having trouble, did I pick up a bunch of flops" he was getting annoyed

The group of hobs were attacking the goblins with everything they had and still they were not winning, john watched as the much smaller goblins were dodging the hobs punches and kicks, the hobs were getting tired as they flailed on the ground, john had a tick mark on his forehead

"enough"

he yelled at the group, they all looked at him, the hobs who were on the ground stopped and looked at their leader, where as the goblins snared at him and kept attacking, he walked up to the nearest goblin looked at its ugly face and backhanded it like he was shooing a fly away, the goblin not paying attention looked and saw the last thing it would ever see again. Its body disappeared in a cloud of blood and mist, everyone stopped what they were doing John's hobs looked at him with stars in their eyes whereas the goblins looked at him with fear

"now that I have all of your attention let me say that again, let us pass now or forever hold your peace"

"?????????"

*cough* "never mind, I'm walking through here trying to find a place to camp, when all of a sudden a group of unknown goblins come and block my path, tell me what am I gonna do"

"you"

he pointed at the other sides hobgoblin

"why are you attacking random groups on the road"

"because we can, this is our road puny human" he said as he spat on the floor

"your road you reckon"

john looked at the hob, slowly making his way towards him, the hob stared at him not moving an inch, as he got closer the size difference was crazy john was 5'7 whereas the hob was 7feet an full of muscle, the hob enjoyed looking down on this puny human, john looked up at the eyes of the hob

"make your move princess"

The hob not understanding the reference had a big smile on his face, he clenched his fists arched his back and threw a punch with everything it had at John's face. John not even batting an eyelid watched as the punch came closer, the hob had a big smile on his face, a face full of ecstasy as he was about to crush this puny humans face. The punch landed but the sound of the puny humans face smashing didn't happen, the only sound heard was the 7foot hobs arm cracking and blood gushing out of hobs now missing arm as he flew across the ground. John slowly made his way over as he had a little smirk on his face, he had the song *bad boys* in his head he finally got the downed hob as it sat there holding it's now missing arm an what smelt like it had an accident from both holes, John leant in close

"this is the difference between you an me, you had power in the muscles, where as I had power in the brain"

It looked up at him with fear in its eyes not wanting to die, john started to pat the hobs cheek

"like I said power in brain, you should of listened" as he slapped the shiznet out of the hob whose face exploded like a balloon, the other goblins dropped to the ground along with poo an piss, John looked around at everyone not saying anything he's done more work than he should of today,

"what's the point of having my own creatures when I have to do all the work and get rid of the enemies, I came to take it easy, to live the best life, work smarter not harder"

John's hobs by now had killed the remaining goblins there was blood and guts everywhere, the hobs stood in front of john wanting to be praised

"I'm highly disappointed in you guys, what the hell happened there, a group of hobs couldn't handle goblins, you're like 3 times the size of them how could you be so pathetic"

"leader we are sorry, don't kill us, don't you remember when we told you we were the runts of our clans we have never fought before, picking up sticks and stones was all self taught"

John looked at the hob who spoke, thinking to himself that he has to teach these guys how to fight like mike Tyson or the hulk. He collected the blood and bodies and continued on his way, he was a little hungry and thirsty so he went to his shop, pulled out his lazy boy and a few beers, browsing through the food section he looked for some chicken and chips, he was hungry for some kfc but he couldn't see any there, he was a little sad but then he remembered the magical pen he got from the old man, he pulled that out

"should I use a piece of paper for some food or nah"

The answer was obvious he wrote *able to get any takeaway from the shop* the words glowed and the paper turned to dust, he found the option for takeaway and got his chicken he sat there in another world with kfc and beers living the best life, the Hobbs were standing there tongues hanging out wanting some food as well, he looked at them sighed and got buckets of chicken and coke and handed them out, they sat there ate with gusto and drunk their coke never had anything that tasted like this before

"the leader is so good to us, I shall lay my body on the line for more of this chicken, and this black liquid called coke"

Sounds like that were heard all around, john and everyone finished their food, he collected everything and continued on his way, he still picked up what ever he could find and put it in his inventory, he looked at his world map an saw a new area was highlighted,

"maybe that's where that other group came from" he thought to himself

He set a way point towards the new area, as he was walking he was observing the hobs, they were all cheering as they walked not paying attention to their surroundings

"bloody useless, these guys are hopeless not a care in the world no wonder they were abandoned, I'm gonna have to teach them how I want things done"

He saw that the new area was around the next bend, he stopped the group and told them what he was going to do, he was looking at the menu and looked at his minions menu

Minions-

• Able to store captured monsters,

• Able to use set commands for monsters to auto battle,

• Monsters who are killed may be revived,

• Monsters who submit may be added,

• Monsters may be trained to a higher level,

• Etc

"mmmm maybe I should train the monsters before we go in, I don't want to be embarrassed like i was before"

He selected all his monsters, they were highlighted, he fixed their shorts, cleaned them up a bit looked at their stats

Race-Hob goblin

Strength- 10/20

Intelligence- 5/20

Speed- 4/20

Luck- 0/20

Constitution- 3/20

"man these stats are terrible, it seems I can't max them out until they gain experience or maybe I should use another paper, but then where's the fun in that of they're too OP, then I would get bored rather quickly"

He tried to equip them with better weapons but all the came up were sticks and stones, he decided to combine the sticks and stones together, what came out were a couple of clubs, he was happy with the stats they weren't much of an improvement bit they'll do for now, The Hobs were happy with the new equipment, he was looking at the shop, an came across some red bull he wondered if it would give his monsters wings of they drunk it, he gave them each a couple of the big cans, they started to get buzzed, they were getting hyped and as he looked at them he spoke

"unleash hell"

They charged past him with the maces drawn yelling who knows what, as he pulled out his lazy boy and a few beers.