Chapter 12

December's arrival brought about a change of weather to Hogwarts, a change Rodrick found himself enjoying. The lands surrounding Hogwarts had taken an icy outlook reducing the temperature drastically, most of the students seemed bothered by the cold, but Rodrick had found himself enjoying it, it reminded him of London.

Ever since the troll incident, his friends, mostly Daphne, seemed to give him a lot more attention. This was no doubt due to the spells he had panicked used during that fight. Remembering the whole ordeal still made him queasy. The attention was unwarranted, but he supposed it was better than her questioning the professors about the spells, something Potter had done in their transfiguration class. He had asked his head of house what the Imperio spell did; the question got a reaction out of Daphne who had been sitting next to him, she unknowingly latched onto his sleeve when it happened.

Luckily no one had noticed, they were all paying attention to the professor. Granger no doubt had explained the other spells he'd used. The teacher's answer guarded, to say the least, she had warned Harry that the spell was forbidden, and had questioned him on where he'd heard it, he'd answered the library to Rodrick's good fortune. After that lesson, it seemed the three Gryffindors were much more wary of Rodrick, while his friends appeared to be a little more protective. Blaise was even more sarcastic than usual; more than once questioning whether Rodrick had performed the spell on him.

The overall result, however, was not unwelcome, it had brought him closer towards them, Tracey had opened up towards him more when she'd found out he'd saved Daphne's life. Blaise seemed to respect him more for his knowledge of spells; Daphne was self-explanatory. However, even then Rodrick knew he didn't deserve it if it weren't for the dream he's not sure he would've managed to deal with the troll. It was one of his bad features; he had a startling lack of self-esteem, fearful of been put in danger himself. When he had battled the troll, his mind had shut off out of fear, the only actual reason he had stood up to the troll in the first place was simple. The dream he'd had... Haunted him severely, the soulless eye and gaping hole were frightening. He was terrified of seeing it again, on anyone for that matter.

His grandfather had reprimanded him severely, Showing fear was one of few things that were not welcome in the family. A lot of his grandfather's old views had changed; he was far more open now than he'd in the past if the history books were anything to consider. But a weak heir was something he would never allow. Rodrick was the family's future, the last chance for success and his grandfather would be damned to hell before he let him mess everything up out of something as trivial as cowardice. Even then Rodrick couldn't help but be grateful for his support, what's an orphan to do after all.

Rodrick awake from his sleepless dreams into a noisy dorm; All the boys seemed quite excited over something. Why this was the case Rodrick would never understand, Blaise had told him it was due to the Quidditch season starting, but Rodrick still couldn't understand the fuss. He made his way down into the common room with Blaise; his friend quickly made his disappearance no doubt to join in on the excitement of the game with everyone else. Rodrick, in turn, settled himself down onto one of the empty sofas. He was currently reading through his Herbology book, his weakest subject, mostly due to lack of practice. He was irritated with the subject but understood its importance; it linked quite well with Potions. He had wanted to speak with his Professor about the subject but hadn't seemed able to find him, or find any time with him any case. The professor had been more agitated than usual recently.

"Rodrick!" called out a female voice, Turning his attention away from the book Rodrick looked up, meeting two green eyes greeting him with a smile.

"Morning Daphne," he replied.

The girl took a seat on the opposite sofa, Rodrick made to look around searching for Tracey who was nowhere in sight. He questioned Daphne but only received a frown in return.

"She's been too focused on Quidditch recently," huffed the girl.

Rodrick sighed before mentioning Blaise being the same. The two had settled into a small silence before Daphne made her way over to his couch, taking a seat by him. She had her head inches away from his shoulder reading the book in his hands.

"I can get you a copy if you want," Rodrick stammered quickly.

Daphne raised an eyebrow before nodding slowly moving away. Rodrick could've sworn he saw a frown on her face. Noticing that he quickly mentioned it being ok and brought the book closer to her. She gave him a smile but made to get her own. 'If grandfather sees's me like this he will either laugh himself to death or die out of disappointment' Rodrick shuddered at the thought and steeled himself a little, it didn't help very much.

...

On his way back from the library, he'd bumped into Harry Potter; The boy eyed him cautiously before Rodrick shrugged and made to move past him, uncomfortable at the stare he'd received. Before he could leave however Harry Potter asked him where he could find Professor Snape, Rodrick a little surprised at the question took a moment before he warned him of Snape's current temper. True to his Gryffindor instincts Harry slightly puffed out his chest and said he wasn't afraid. Rolling his eyes Rodrick pointed towards the professor's office and left in the opposite direction not willing to deal with any of the consequences.

...

The next morning was the long awaited game between Slytherin and Gryffindor, Rodrick immediately made plans to avoid the whole spectacle, even the stands where the students were going to be watching from were too high for his tastes. His grandfather might shoot his ear off at this but height was a subject Rodrick likely would never budge on. He made his way into the great hall to have his breakfast; he noticed his friends arguing at the table trying to decide where they would be watching the game from, Daphne was trying to act as the buffer between Blaise and Tracey, neither of them, however, seemed to take her seriously.

They turned their heads towards him when they saw him arrive and proceeded to bombard him with questions. When he mentioned his plans to avoid the entire thing, Tracey's mouth hit the floor, Blaise's frown was quite humourous though he never mentioned it. Daphne was filled with amusement. He told them his plans for studying and asked whether any wanted to join, Blaise and Tracey quickly shut down the thought, as predicted. Daphne was hesitant in answering before saying she might join him later. The look of betrayal on Tracey's face was positively dangerous. After stressing the importance of keeping up their studies she seemed a bit less likely to murder him in his sleep. He spent the rest of the morning talking to Blaise about homework much to the boy's displeasure, though he hadn't even started half of it, so he couldn't very well complain.

Rodrick spent most of the afternoon in the library trying to learn history, by the time he reached the second chapter he was contemplating muggle school.

When he'd first seen the history lesson he'd been excited, he had wanted to learn about dark wizards and their stories. It wasn't a cheerful subject but by the gods was it interesting. The different methods various wizards used to try and achieve their plans were broad in range. The way they failed was even broader. It ranged from stupid to genius to priceless, Voldemort been an excellent example of the latter.

Unfortunately, however, his current assignment was about one goblin war or the other, he was having trouble trying to find the bloody year, he had spent almost 20 minutes whisking through the book trying to find the goblin name Binns had mentioned before it dawned on him that Binns might have made a mistake himself. He had done that often enough according to some of the older students.

Giving up the arduous task Rodrick made his way over towards the shelf of books to return it, the librarian spotted him and asked him what the problem was. When he mentioned what he was looking for, she looked displeased, perhaps assuming she was being made fun off. Rodrick feigned finding what he was looking for before making his way back to his seat and opening up another textbook. He would later find his friends in their common room looking defeated; Daphne explained the loss Slytherin received. After a while ithe depressing spell had worn of the two Slytherin's, they were all quickly piled into a conversation by the other first years discussing their plans for Christmas. Having none, Rodrick moved away from the group and went to sit on his own, he opened up a DADA book borrowed from the library.

"Whats wrong?" someone called out, He didn't need to turn to know the voice.

"Nothing, I am just uncomfortable over there."

"I can see that," snorted Daphne.

By now the others had joined them.

"Rodrick what are you planning to do for Christmas, you ran off without, answering," asked Blaise.

"Ought to be fairly obvious then." he remarked lazily.

The three students raised an eyebrow at this before Tracey broke the silence.

"You don't have any plans? don't you want to visit your fam-" but before she could finish she quickly covered her mouth.

Rodrick rolled his eyes "Oh yes the orphanage certainly seems like a happy place to spend my holidays in."

Tracey made to apologize but was stopped by Rodrick who shrugged "It doesn't matter, I'll be spending it here with the ghosts and rats of Hogwarts." Rodrick grumbled before he stood up, "I am tired" he sighed as he left.

The three students were left in silence, Tracey took a seat on the sofa feeling guilty about what had transpired, Daphne attempted to soothe her with a hand on her shoulder to no avail, it didn't help she felt just as bad about the situation. 'He'll be spending Christmas alone,' Daphne thought with a frown

"I'll try and talk to him," said Blaise sheepishly "I know, no sarcasm." he added on.