Part I - Chapter 1

It was a Friday when Daniel and I confessed our feelings for each other.

Apparently, some student saw Daniel and I kiss and told someone—and somehow his parents found out.

Daniel told me that his parents were really religious, so I was pretty worried about what would happen to him. Although it didn't sound like they were bad people from how Daniel would talk about them, I still knew it probably wouldn't end well.

I decided to send him an email that evening, asking him if he was okay, but he never ended up replying.

I could barely concentrate on anything the whole weekend thinking about Daniel. Even when Nathan's annoying friends were over and teasing me whenever I was in the room, I didn't care. I just worried about Daniel.

"Hey, it's little sissy Cody," Kyle, the main member of the group who was always the one causing mischief and was now a party-loving frat boy, called out to me. He always called me that even when we were younger, and I just got used to it because I'd never say anything about it.

I sighed. "What?"

Farid snickered, the one who always acted all respectful and sweet to adults but was crude and would say some pretty shocking things when he was with the rest of the group. He was probably the most annoying out of all of them, and he'd say some pretty explicit things about girls he was attracted to. "You wanna hang out with us? We don't bite. Unless you're into that."

Nathan punched him in the arm. "That's not funny, that's my little brother. Sick, man…"

"You're right, my bad. I think I'm still high from that sesh Eric and I had earlier."

I rolled my eyes, and so did Nathan. Both my brother and I were pretty straight edge, my brother wasn't interested in that kind of stuff. At least not from what I've seen.

Eric, the other 'goody' one of the group, who was going through his own rebellious phase because of the pressure from his strict asian parents, hit Farid as well. "Y-You don't have to say it so loud, idiot! What if Nathan's parents hear!? They're just down the hall, you know!"

"We're nineteen, the age of experimentation. You'll understand it when you're older, Cody," Kyle said.

"Whatever," I said before leaving the room to go to my own bedroom. Secretly, I hoped Nathan would move out soon so his weird friends didn't talk to me anymore.

I laid down on my bed, worrying about how Daniel was doing. I just hoped he was okay.

---

Daniel never showed up to class the Monday after the weekend. He didn't show up to lunch either, and I knew I should have asked his friends—but it's not like they liked me, and I wasn't going to lie, they intimidated me. So I didn't ask.

But in one of my classes, I overheard some of the students gossiping amongst each other. Talking about how Daniel got pulled out of this school by his parents and how he was going to be sent to some strict catholic boarding school in another city instead.

I felt like my stomach dropped. I thought I was going to throw up.

I skipped my next class to hide somewhere just to cry. I never cried over anybody before. Never in my life did I think anyone was worth crying over.

But I cried a lot, just wishing I could be with Daniel again.

When I got home that day I cried some more, trying not to let my parents or my brother see me and start asking questions. He never replied to my email, and even when I sent another, there was still nothing.

Daniel was gone from my life.

---

(Four years later)

Even though I spent the next few weeks after that mourning for him, I somehow knew it was too good to be true. And so I spent the rest of high school going back to being alone in my own world, just me and some good ol' reading.

I knew Daniel's old friends didn't like me, they thought I was the reason Daniel was sent away. And they weren't wrong, it's the truth. I blamed myself for making Daniel like me.

But I moved on with life, growing both mentally and physically, and finally ended up graduating high school, getting ready to go away for university in the fall. My parents were nervous about me going to school for the first time with females around, but I assured them that I was solely focused on school itself. I was glad that I was finally getting the chance to be away from my parents and actually do my own thing the way I wanted.

I wouldn't forget my parents telling me that they would pray for me daily while I'm away, which meant double the prayer they already did for Nathan ever since he moved out to live on his own. I almost felt bad for them.

But here I was, pulled up to the parking lot of the university. It was strange seeing all kinds of different genders mixed on the same campus. I brought my things to my assigned dormitory room. When I got there, there was a girl with light brown hair, freckles scattered across her face, and heavy makeup on hanging up decorations on one side of the room. She looked at me. "'Sup? You Cody Vale?"

I nodded. "Yeah," I said, closing the door behind me. "You are?"

She finished putting up the photo and walked over to me to give me a hand with my things. "Nia Fotia."

She helped me settle my things on what would be my side of the room. "I didn't think I would have a girl as my roommate."

She raised a brow. "Are you afraid of girls or something?"

I shook my head. "I just never got the chance to ever really talk to any my age. I went to all-boy schools my whole life until now."

Nia smiled. I noticed that she had a silver nose ring. "I see, I see. Well, I think it's cool that mixed gender dormitories are a thing here. Getting kinda tired of the whole segregation of gender in society as a whole."

"Yeah," is all I said in response before I started unpacking my things. "Well, it's nice to meet you, Cody. What's your major?"

"Literature," I said, putting away my clothes in the closet. "Yours?"

"Computer science."

"Cool."

Nia checked her phone before she picked up her sweater off the bed and put it on and grabbed her bag. "I gotta get to class. It was nice to meet you, Cody. I'll see you later, yeah? We should get to know each other more," she said before heading out.

I never talked that much with a girl before. Now I have one as my roommate? This is definitely going to be an interesting experience…

---

I finished putting away all my clothes and set up my beddings before I got ready for my first class that was in the afternoon. I decided to take some selfies while I was wearing one of my good shirts. The lighting from the window was good too.

I took a few pictures of myself doing a few different poses and expressions before adding a matching filter for both of them before uploading them up on Flumblr, adding just 'first day' as the caption.

A few months ago, I actually found out that Flumblr was a popular social media site where you could upload any kind of content and customize your profile and feed to whatever aesthetic you like.

I couldn't help but want to try it out since a lot of authors and fanfiction writers would post stuff on there, so maybe I could follow them and see what they're like. But I ended up getting pretty addicted to the site, it was so easy to get to know others with similar interests as my own. I could actually talk directly with people who read the same books as me.

One day I just decided to take some selfies of myself, then uploaded them just like how some of the other people I follow would do… And surprisingly, it got attention from a lot of people. I mean, I was usually used to getting attention for being so 'pretty' or whatever, but I wasn't gonna lie, seeing how much attention I was getting in numbers definitely didn't feel bad.

So I ended up reposting a lot of stuff that fit into a bit of a minimalist pastel aesthetic and decorated my blog to match as well. The more time I spent on the site and the more selfies I uploaded of myself, the more followers I would get. My selfies used to just consist of me doing a random pose or expression and showing off whatever I was doing at that moment, but I actually found myself to be more photogenic than I thought. Must be something about me, or I wouldn't have so many people following me. I'd even get occasional sexual comments, which was flattering to know that I've turned on some people.

Anyways, after I uploaded my new selfies the likes just began rolling in just a few minutes. I just kept refreshing my feed and seeing how many people liked my face. It did make me feel good.

I exited the Flumblr app before opening up the map of the campus so I could find my class. Good thing the digital map was interactive and my avatar on the screen would move on the map as I moved in real life.

After finding my way around the campus, I finally made it to building D, which was where my first tuesday class was.

I decided to sit in the front row, but not in the corner. Being in the middle was fine, and it was easier to see the screen and take notes.

As I waited for the professor to arrive, I decided to go on my phone and continue one of the ebooks I was reading, Two Princes. Sure, it was considered controversial because of some of its content—but damn, the plot was too juicy. I kept reading, getting lost in the plot, getting myself sunken into the world of the story.

Prince Andrew is the kind of person I'd like to be… He's emotional but still knows how to be rational and not give into temptation. Sure, Prince Virgil might be kind of crazy, but he's also kind of sexy—

And suddenly I heard the classroom door open, and I looked up seeing him walking in. A handsome and slightly scruffy man—most likely in his mid to late thirties, deep brown hair falling in his face as he pushed up his glasses. He swung around the leather bag he was holding before placing it on top of the table at the front of the room. He was wearing a casual suit with a coat over it, and shoes of leather just like the bag.

"Ah, so we have someone who actually willingly sits in the front," he said, in that clear voice of his with a playful smirk in my direction. He had bright hazel eyes.

I assumed it was because I was one of the only few other people who arrived to class a bit early, and I was the only one sitting in the first two rows. The few others were sitting closer to the back.

I shrugged. "My eyesight's not that good. I need to sit closer to see."

The man took a sip from his coffee tumbler. "Those big blue eyes of yours can't see from afar? That's unfortunate."

I know he probably didn't really mean it more than just a light joke, but something about it made me feel kinda weird inside, in a good way. "Uh… Yeah, no, but you wear glasses, so you probably know what it's like."

The man lightly chuckled. His laugh was… nice. "Yeah, I do. But I actually couldn't see near or far. My overall eyesight totally sucked. That's why I hated when the bullies back in middle school would trip me and then run away with my glasses."

"That's awful," I said with a slightly irritated tone. He just laughed again. "Yeah, but you know how kids are at that age. I'm just thankful it was just stuff like that and nothing worse." He took a sip of his coffee again. He looked down on his coat and sighed, picking off a clump of hair from it. "My cat… I had already gotten ready this morning and I had a bit of time before leaving, so I played with her a bit…"

I couldn't help but smile a bit. "Cats are cute. I always wanted a pet."

He took off his jacket before walking around the table and leaning against it. "You should get one, but only if you can take good care of 'em. I love my Peggy. She's a good companion."

"You're a literature professor, I'm sure it's nice to be reading books with a cat snuggled up to you."

He chuckled again. "Oh yeah, for sure. With that late-night coffee in my mug, too," he said before taking a sip of his coffee again. "What's your name?" He asked me.

"Cody," I said. "Yours?"

He smiled. "Julian Reed-Mannings. But I prefer just Julian," he said. He looked around the room, seeing more students had come in as the two of us had been talking. I guess both of us were so focused on each other and our conversation that we didn't notice the room filling up.

"Guess I better start this lesson," he said as he checked his watch. He walked around back to set his stuff up for the lecture. I pulled out my laptop to set up to take notes.

There was chitchat amongst everyone in the room as the room was completely full now. Julian finished setting up everything to get started on the lecture. "Alright, class, welcome to Introduction to Classic Literature," he said out loud as the class began to quiet down. "And don't worry, yes, I will be posting these slides online for you all," he said as a few chuckles came from the students.

He pulled up his slideshow and began his lecture. He really had such a presence, and the way he spoke was so clear and somewhat eloquent. I could probably sit and listen to him talk about anything.

I tried to take notes to the best that I could, but I was so easily distracted by Julian. It was easy to understand what he was explaining, but something about him was making my thoughts wander off to somewhere else.

I just couldn't stop staring at him the entire lecture that I'd even miss some points that I should have written down. I don't know what it was about him that had me so nervous all of a sudden. From the moment he stepped into the room, I was already feeling somewhat shy.

From time to time I'd catch his gaze while he was talking about what he was teaching, but I didn't think it really meant anything. He has to make eye contact with all the students, right? Maybe It's just in my head that he's looking at me more…

Secretly, I hoped he was. I hoped he thought I was pretty like everyone else did.

His jokes and little sarcastic comments he'd make in his lecture genuinely amused me, he really was kind of a funny guy. Handsome, easy to talk to, and funny… What my luck to have such a man like this teaching me.

I just really hope I'll do well in this class. I want to impress him, I thought to myself as I tried to actually focus on what he was teaching.

---

After he finished the lecture, I was somewhat disappointed it was over and I would have to wait until next week to see him.

I waited until the other students left and finished asking him questions before I approached him. He smiled at me. "Cody. What can I do for you?"

Ha, well… I cleared my throat. "I, uh, wanted to say that I enjoyed the lecture. I thought the book you assigned to us is truly a classic."

"Ah, you've already read it? Well, I sure hope you don't spoil it for your fellow peers," he said with a chuckle.

"Mmhmm, I just wanted to tell you that I like reading, so I really appreciate courses like this."

"Oh? You enjoy reading? I'm glad to hear that. What's your favourite book?"

I took a moment to think. That's a hard one… "I'd say either Darkness Thirty by Elwood Barron, or I, The Jester by Zach Muzak."

Julian nodded before pushing up his glasses. "Two very good books, I have read both of them. Both are very different from each other. If you liked Darkness Thirty, I recommend Where to Find Me In Hell by K.C. Dennings."

"Oh, okay," I said with a nod. "I'll check it out."

"If you want to, I can lend it to you. I have the special edition. I haven't read it in a while so it's pretty much gathering dust on my bookshelf," he said. I gave him a small smile. "Thank you, that would be great."

"For sure. I'll bring it next week," he said as he began to put his coat on. "Do you have anything more to ask, Cody?"

I shook my head, not being able to think of anything more to say, even though I wanted to so badly. "No, that's all for now. Thank you, sir."

He chuckled again. "Please, as I said, just Julian is fine," he said before picking up his bag. "If you have any more questions regarding anything about the course or any of the assignments, don't hesitate to email me, okay? One of the slides has my email on it."

"Alright, bye," I said before heading out. I took a deep breath as I walked out of the building and headed to the nearest vending machine to buy something to drink.

I bought a bottle of lemonade and took a sip to cool myself off. That short conversation with Julian made my heart race. The weird thing was that even though he made me feel nervous, I liked it. It was an exciting kind of nervous. I wanted to experience it again.

And I would by next week, wouldn't I?

I decided to head to the library to do some quiet studying. The library was huge and modern, with tons of books and computers all around. I decided to do the homework that we were already assigned, going a bit above and beyond with my answers in hopes to impress Julian.

After I finished, I headed back to my dorm room for the evening to see Nia with her headphones on (which were loud as hell, even I could hear whatever she was listening to once I entered the room) as she was scrolling through social media on her phone.

I walked over to my side of the room and took off my bag before sitting on the bed. Once Nia saw me, she took off her headphones before pausing her music. "Yo, Cody."

"Hey," I said, before taking my phone out of my bag and logging onto Flumblr. Wow, my recent selfies did really well. Four hundred and sixty three likes!

"How was your first class?" She asked me and I locked my phone before sitting back on my bed. "It was interesting. Yours?"

"Meh. It was okay," she said before she did the same. She sighed. "School is hard."

"It's only the first day," I pointed out and she laughed. "Yeah, and it's already hard."

I stared up at the ceiling. I couldn't help but think about Julian again. Maybe I should shoot him an email and ask him about the next assignment, even though he didn't even assign it yet…

Nia sat up. "Alright, we need to establish some rules for our room," she said as she punched the air. "'Cause I got a few I wanna lay down."

"Alright. Go ahead."

She nodded. "Number one, don't touch each other without each other's consent," she said. "I don't want you trying to cop a feel when I'm sleeping."

I almost wanted to laugh. "You won't have to worry about that. I don't swing that way."

"Still, you said you never really were close to any girls, right? I don't want you going around being curious and end up sniffing my panties or something."

"Uhh…"

"Anyways, number two, no hooking up with people in each other's beds. Use your own."

"You won't have to worry about that either," I said, crossing my arms behind my head. "I've never done it."

"Aw, that's cute," Nia said. "Hopefully you'll get some soon enough. This is what university's all about."

I only shrugged in response.

"Rule number three, please don't touch my stuff without asking. I don't mean this in a rude way, it just drives me nuts when people touch my laptop n' shit and mess around with it. It's not a toy."

"Got it," I said before rolling up my sleeves. It was a bit hot in the room.

Nia looked over at me, inspecting me. "Cool bracelet," she said, nodding at me. "You make it yourself?"

My heart nearly sunk at the mention of it. I always wore Daniel's bracelet on me that sometimes I'd even forget that I was wearing it.

"No, uh…" I touched the bracelet around my wrist. "An old friend gave it to me."

She probably sensed that she had maybe touched a sensitive subject, as she just slowly nodded and changed the subject. "Well, Cody, I'm thinking 'bout ordering some food before I get started on some gaming. You want anything?"

Thinking about it, I really was actually pretty hungry. "I don't have any money to pay you back."

"It's cool. It's on me," she said. "But you really have nothing? You might want to consider getting a job on campus or something."

"Maybe," I said, taking off my sweater. "If I do, I'll be sure to pay you back."

Nia laughed. "I told you, don't worry 'bout that! Consider this a warming welcome meal from your new roommate." She took her phone and fiddled around with it. "What food do you like?"

"Anything," I said, and she raised a brow. "I don't trust people who just say 'anything' and then don't end up liking what I get."

"I mean it. Anything is fine."

"Well okay," she said before finishing ordering on her phone. "Chinese it is."

She got up and walked over to her desk, opening up her expensive-looking laptop that she most likely used for gaming. "Anyways, this is my baby right here."

"What do you play?" I asked, not that I really had any knowledge of video games, but I knew that Nathan played a lot.

"I'm really into RPGs… the Myth of Zelpher is definitely one of my favourites."

Oh, I heard of it before. I'm not sure if Nathan plays it. "Nice," is all I said.

"Mmhmm. Hope you don't mind if I ignore you now," she said before putting her headphones on and sitting at her desk, opening up her laptop and starting up one of her games to begin playing.

I decided to scroll through Flumblr and like some posts as Nia continued playing on her laptop while we waited for the food to arrive. When Nia's phone chimed, she asked me if I could go down to the front of the dorm building to get the food.

After I went down to get the food and headed back to our room, Nia took a break from her game as the both of us shared dinner and talked while we ate.

Nia was really chill, and I could really see myself becoming closer with her. I never expected myself to become friends with a girl in real life before, I only really befriended girls through Flumblr. She made me feel that kind of comfort that I felt with Daniel, but less romantic and rather platonic.

"So, what do you like to do for fun?" Nia asked me after we finished our food and just ended up laying down on our beds and talking. That food sure filled us up good.

"Reading," I said. "I guess you like gaming, huh?"

"Yeah, it's really the only thing I like to do," she said with a sigh. "I'm just glad I can finally have some freedom out here in university."

"Not much at home?"

Nia sighed again. "My dad is just so overprotective of me. He's always been so strict and shit… He was a captain in the army."

"Oh, wow."

"Yeah. You can probably guess how that goes." She said before I thought about my parents and how I used to think they were so strict, but I found that the more I learned about other people's home lives, the more I felt kind of grateful for my own. Sure, my parents can be kind of annoying religious freaks that got on my nerves sometimes, but they were good parents.

"So, just you and your dad?" I asked, trying to be subtle about asking about her mom.

"Yup. Just us two. My mom died before they could make any more kids," she said casually. "I was like, seven years old when she died. She was really sick and didn't tell anybody, didn't want to hold back my dad from his ambitions in the army."

"Your dad was that serious about it?"

"Yeah. Something that has to do with his own dad, I don't know. I don't really care," Nia said. "Anyways, my dad ended up getting discharged anyway a few years ago 'cause he fucked up his leg."

"Is he alright?"

"Oh, yeah. He just doesn't serve anymore because of it, which I know he's still pissed over. Whatever, that's his problem." She sat up. "Sorry for talking so much about my life. I forgot to even ask about your own."

"It's okay," I said as I shrugged. "I don't mind listening."

"Tell me about you, Cody," she said before reaching for the bottle of water on the other side of her bed.

And so, Nia and I ended up pretty much talking all evening about ourselves, and it felt so natural to talk to her. She was really cool and funny, and it felt like time flew by. I felt happy. I definitely knew Nia was someone I could trust.

We talked all the way until it was late, and we both cleaned up the room before getting ready for bed. I took my towel and my toiletries with me to bring with me to the men's showers.

I made it to the men's showers and entered an empty stall before closing the curtain, hanging up my towel on the wall before getting undressed. Once I was naked, I turned on the water, letting the water wash over my hair and body.

Today sure was eventful, I thought to myself. I started university, have a new roommate who's a female, and met such a dreamy guy who's my professor…

I closed my eyes and let the water come down on my face and neck, letting it run down the rest of my body. Julian Reed-Mannings… There's something about him that makes me want to know him better.

I turned around to let the water run down the back of myself. He made me feel so nervous earlier, but I liked it… I don't know how to explain it, but I just want to see him again. I don't know if I can wait until next week.

I got my body wash and squeezed some into my hand, lathering it with my hands before rubbing it on my body. He's so cute, I can't stop thinking about him…!

As I rubbed the body wash on myself, one of my hands began to lead downwards the more I thought about Julian. I… I wouldn't mind giving my virginity to someone like him…

I imagined a scenario in my head that I remember reading in a fanfiction between a male college student and his professor, but instead, I pictured Julian and I.

I'm sitting on top of the desk in the middle of the front row of the classroom, and it's just Julian and I there. Just the two of us, and he's telling me how he's disappointed in me about failing the assignment he had given.

Julian sighs, running a hand through his hair as he leans against the table. "It's an unfortunate thing to see, Cody. I really know that you can do better than this, I've seen how well you've done on the homework I always assign."

I tilt my head down before looking up at him as cute as I can, pouting. "I'm sorry, Julian… Is there any way that I can make up for it?"

Julian thinks for a moment. "I'm afraid I can't let you redo the assignment, so all I can ask is for you to do better on the next assignments to come."

I push myself off from the desk, slowly walking closer to him. "Please, Julian? There must be something I can do to make up for it…" I pretend to take a moment to think before smirking at him, placing a hand on his chest. "Do you think I'm cute?"

Julian's eyes widen as he's slightly taken aback. "Wh-what?"

"I want to know," I say, locking my gaze with his gorgeous hazel eyes. "Do you think I'm cute?"

Julian gulps nervously, his face beginning to redden. "Yeah, you're very cute, Cody…"

I bit my lip and squeezed my dick, gently tugging on it as just imagining Julian saying those words to me. I wanted him to tell me more, tell me how pretty I was, tell me how much he wanted me.

I smile at him before sliding my hand down before getting on my knees. My hand lingers on his crotch as he just looks down at me in shock, but he doesn't stop me. "Maybe I know how I can make up for it," I say, groping him through his slacks as he softly moans and brings a hand to his face to try and hide his blush.

"Cody…"

I reach for his belt and begin to undo it, undoing his pants along with it before slowly pulling them down his hips before looking up at him with my innocent blue eyes. "Do you want me, Julian?" I ask, grabbing him through his underwear as he sighs. "You want a pretty boy like me so bad, don't you?"

Julian gulps again. "Y-yeah…" He says shakily.

I pull down the waistband of his underwear before pulling his dick out, imagining it to be around six or seven inches long and circumcised, having a bit of an elegant upwards curve to it.

I stare at it with wide eyes, holding it with a hand. "What do you want me to do with it?" I ask as I look at him, lightly slapping it against my cheek as I could feel it growing harder.

Julian was shy, and it was really cute to see him like that. "Play with it, stroke it, suck it… Anything you want, Cody…"

I rub my face against it while opening my mouth, letting my tongue hang out before licking the underside of his dick as he moans out loud, placing a hand on top of my head.

I was jerking my hardening cock with my soapy hand, trying my hardest to be quiet as I continued to let the erotic fantasy of Julian and I run through my head while I pleasured myself.

"You like that, huh?" I ask before licking the slit at the head of his cock, tasting the essence of salty precum.

"Y-yes, wow, Cody…"

I retract my tongue before spitting on his dick, taking it all in my mouth as I maintain eye contact with him the entire time, getting my mouth down to where my fist was as he leans his head back and moans wantonly.

I slowly move my head back and forth before popping off of him, spitting on his cock again before moving back in to move my mouth on him faster this time. He grips my hair in his hand, repeatedly whispering out my name as I continue to please him with my mouth, showing him that I was a good boy who deserved good grades.

I pillow my tongue under his cock while I moved back and forth on him, before popping off of him again, saliva still connecting my wet mouth to his hard cock. "I'm a good boy, aren't I?" I ask before continuing to jerk his cock, wanting him to cum.

"Yeah… Good boy…" He manages to breathily let out between pants, his glasses fogging up as I suck his cock and practically worship it with my mouth like the good boy I was.

I leaned my back against the shower wall, quietly panting as I hastily continued jerking my hard cock in my hand, feeling myself getting closer to my climax. My heart was beating hard and fast in my chest, and my mind was hazy with lust.

Soon, his pants begin to quicken, his face looking completely lost in his pleasure. "C-Cody, I… Nnn…"

"You can cum on my face, Julian… Cum on my cute face…"

And with that, Julian's grip on my hair tightens as he sighs my name out loud, shutting his eyes as his cock spurts out hot semen on my face, making me close an eye as it splattered upon my eyelid, my nose, my lips, and even a bit on my neck.

He lets go of my hair and takes a moment to breathe, tilting my chin up with a finger as he smiles at me, admiring my face with his cum painted upon it. "You look so cute."

"Shit," I mumbled as I grit my teeth, squeezing my cock as I came, the semen being quickly washed away with the shower water. I took a moment just to calm myself down, letting the water rinse me before turning it colder so I could recover quicker from my orgasm high.

I never masturbated to the thought of anyone before… I felt some shame in what I had done as I continued on with my shower.

After I finished showering, I turned off the water and wrapped the towel around my waist before gathering my things and going over to the sink to brush my teeth. After I was done, I returned to my room, the lights already out. Nia was in bed with the covers pulled up, scrolling through social media on her phone.

She turned her phone off and turned over to face the wall when she saw me return. "You can change, I'm going to sleep. You don't have to worry about me looking or anything like that."

"You can look if you want, there's not much to see," I said jokingly.

"I'm good, thanks. Goodnight, Cody," she said before going to sleep. I got out some clean underwear before putting them on, then getting something comfortable to sleep in.

I set my alarm for the next day before I climbed into my bed, pulling the covers up before I turned on my side. I can't believe I really fantasized about Julian and then masturbated to it… What the hell is wrong with me!

It wasn't like I never masturbated before—I had done it many times after an explicit fanfiction got me hard—but I never did it to an actual person before… It was new to me, and I thought it was weird, too.

Why the hell am I so fixated on Julian? Out of all the people I could have liked… It had to be my own literature professor.

I decided to just try and sleep to get my mind off of it and him for the moment, but I wished that I knew what exactly that innocent crush would lead to.

If only I knew.