Fruition

It's been some days since that discussion with Jiyong-hyung. He's still mad, not at anyone in particular, just at the world I guess. Or if I must say so, he's mad at himself, for not being capable of changing anything.

For me, life has gotten quite regular. Just school, going to practice, then going to the store and finally to the dorms. Every day was pretty much the same. But this whole situation made me think about a lot of things, also made me make some decisions, as well as prepare for the future.

That conversation with Jiyong-hyung reminded me of my situation. And that lead us to the conversation I'm having right now.

— What do you mean you won't sing? — Jiyong-hyung angrily asked me.

— Just as I told you, I don't have plans of singing, or even talking too much if I ever debut — I repeated myself, clearly enunciating each word.

— Why? — he asked once again with repressed anger, but then bitterly sighed.

That was one of my decisions during these last days. A decision that was already accepted by our PD-nim himself. That's why I was telling them right now. This was my own back-up, if I need to leave the group I mean. If we continued with the hyungs' plans, of me becoming the main vocal, it wouldn't be good for the group if I have to leave. That's the same reason I also won't be the main dancer for the group. That means, we still need someone to fit in those roles before we ever debut. Neither Jiyong-hyung nor Tempo-hyung were up to the task, and Youngbae-hyung can't handle both of them, not right now at least.

That left us with a line-up composed of two rappers, and someone who would be possibly a lead dancer and a lead vocal. If excluding me, of course.

After the little exchange of words with Jiyong-hyung, he left the room where we were practicing.

— That went better than I expected — nobody replied. I guess that Jiyong-hyung wasn't the only that was frustrated. I mean, Jiyong-hyung and me were the ones that had been training for the most time, but Youngbae-hyung, and even Tempo-hyung had been training for quite a lot too.

— Don't mind him — it was Youngbae-hyung — he just needs some time to think. I mean, we've been through this before.

It's true though, Youngbae-hyung and Jiyong-hyung were planned to debut as a Hip-Hop duo some time ago. But then, the same situation we're going through now happened to them, with the little difference that the new members added back then were Tempo-hyung, who was his friend, and me, who had been training for some time with him.

This time, though, not even the PD knew who was going to be added, as it seems he still didn't have anyone in mind.

— But did you mean it? — Tempo-hyung curiously asked.

I knew perfectly what he meant, did I really mean it when I said that I wasn't going to sing, and not even talk too much?

— I DO mean it — I simply nodded.

— But… does that mean you've given up? — he asked once again, clearly nervous.

— Giving up, huh? — I looked at the ceiling, as if trying to see beyond it. Then, a ridiculing smile surfaced —… not a chance.

Both hyungs stared at me, clearly confused. Tempo-hyung even raised his eyebrows while staring at me. Noticing their expressions, I elaborated a little bit.

— Do you remember what PD-nim said? — they wondered a little bit, before Youngbae-hyung finally said.

— "You need a charm, good enough to captivate the audience", wasn't it? — I looked at him, nodding.

— But if you're not going to sing, nor dance.. — Tempo-hyung quickly asked, but I interrupted him.

— Who said I'm not going to dance? — I asked with a confident smile on my face. Tempo-hyung was still puzzled, but Youngbae-hyung had realization written on his face.

— Didn't you say you were not going to dance? — Tempo-hyung asked, but I shook my head.

— I just said I wasn't going to become the main dancer of the group. That just means I won't be at the front of all of the choreographies, we need someone else to fit that position. It doesn't mean I won't dance at all, just that it'll be a little bit different — I noticed that Tempo-hyung was still a little bit confused, so I continued — Let me put an example, isn't Youngbae-hyung good at dancing?

I turned to look at Youngbae-hyung who already understood, and then at Tempo-hyung who was nodding.

— If he's that good, why isn't he the main dancer? — Tempo-hyung was visibly shaken by the question, so I continued — remember what I told you some time ago? The thing is, Youngbae-hyung has his own style, and I'm not referring to his technique, I mean that every dance he does, no matter the genre, has his own…. watermark if I must say so. Haven't you noticed that every time he dances to a slow song, it always ends up being erotic?

That earned a few chuckles from both Hyungs, specially Youngbae-hyung that was still laughing with his eye smile. But still, I continued my explanation.

— That means, it's not because he CAN'T become the main dancer, he's good enough, just that he WON'T be the main dancer because that would put a restriction to his dancing. There are other things, of course, like if he does become the Main Vocal, as I told you some time ago, that would also get in the way of him dancing during performances. The thing is, we're looking for someone more… traditional, to become our main dancer. Someone who's good enough, and can fit a lot of styles.

After that long explanation, Tempo-hyung finally understood, as he said.

— But doesn't that mean that either you, or Youngbae are good enough to become the main dancer of our group? — puzzled by his response, I simply nodded, while he continued.

—Aren't we awesome then? — he said with a conceited smile, making me smile a little bit about his clowny behavior.

— Anyway, now that you understood Youngbae-hyung's situation, you can guess what's going on with me, right? — I finally asked.

— You have something special planned for the judgement, right? — I confidently smiled at him, earning myself a big reaction from hyung.

— There it is!! There it is!! That smile, something's going to happen soon!

I really appreciate him being this expressive, as the other hyungs, and even myself are really serious. Just as Hyung kept joking, a member of the staff entered the room and said, while giving me an envelope.

— King C, you have a letter, it came this morning — I received the envelope and looked at the sender.

Another letter from Damian, I simply opened the envelope immediately, hoping to see the same short message as ever. But this time, I was really surprised by the letter he sent me. Both Hyungs, seeing me that surprised, approached me and also took a look at the letter.

That way, all of us had a really serious expression.

— Could it be true? — Youngbae-hyung asked.

— I don't know…. But the least I can do is to check it… — I finally sighed.

Life really loves to surprise me...