Chapter 18

RM POV

I look at her my eyes graying with darkness as I realized that my made-up name is so fucking stupid.

"It's ok, Azulia was it? Don't worry about me. I'm fine but we should go and find your friend."

"Oh yeah if you say so." She looked at me her eyes filled with what I thought was a lustful lack of concern, As we walked together we talked and laughed. AT first it was a simple way to cover space but soon we were really getting to know each other. I dare to say Yoongi may know her body but I know her personality, Her likes and dislikes. Or at least common knowledge. Which was more than h-

NO I shook my head cutting off the thought

" YOu okay she asked with a slightly concerned look? "

"If you need to rest I'M sure i could find her-

" No , no it's fine " I say, grabbing her hand in mine .

" I'm Fine" I smiled as she smiled back softly, her hand in mine for a second before we separated and a slight blush formed on her face. Her soft blush only made me antagonize more and my confidence grew. It was then that the voice in the back of my head spoke, warning me I sighed.

My self confidence slightly over takes me for a second as we continue on. At first we clearly had a mission to find her friend, and yet as the day grew later we had forgotten our plan to find her. WE had stopped and gotten a drink and doughnuts to go as we talked in the line while waiting. Soon we began our search again . Then suddenly as I watched her smiling and having fun I had bumped into someone small and plump.

"Aww that hurt." as Azulia and I looked down Azulia laughed and I with confusion helped this plump girl up off the street and back to her feet. Then as if they knew each other they embraced and I without words watched on. Azulia looked at me and smiled "This is my friend Bea, Bea this is chuck". Azulia's friend Bea laughed as hard as she could and whispered into Azulia's ear.

Bea POV

I couldn't stop my laughter as I looked this man up and down then I leaned in and told Zul what she needed to know " hey Zul hehe sweet sweet boo thang hahahaha that's not some man named chuck, that's RM from BTS...you know the guy that raps along with Suga." as she heard this she gave him a cold dead glare. Her eyes darkened with hatred. The air around her turned cold. In my mind I could see her soul leaving her body to exact a not so clean death to the now soulless looking doll of a man in front of us. I looked at her and then him.Then suddenly she pulled me away as we left he followed yelling after us explaining why he lied she soon slowed to a stop and let him catch his breath and speak as he did he slipped up and said " when I saw you that night on the beach, I felt love for you but my drunken state and my mind racing had nothing to do with the kiss we shared it was the instant attraction,.. NO love for you for which I felt". With that he covered his lips as she looked away blushing it was the slip up that changed what we all knew to be true about this stranger. Soon her eyes darkened and I knew she had snapped . He was in for it whether he knew it or not. A logical mind like hers. A beauty with a broken heart. He was doomed. I sighed as she turned on her heels. Oh how I wished I had brought some popcorn.

Azulia pov

I gritted my teeth as I could feel the happiness drain from my face. Bea had just told me my new found companion was a trojan horse. An enemy in disguise, I took all my strength not to snap in public on the boardwalk. I was determined not to make a scene as I sent him a spine chilling glare and grabbed bea . It wasn't until he spoke and I stopped in my tracks.

" when I saw you that night on the beach, I felt love for you but my drunken state and my mind racing had nothing to do with the kiss we shared. It was the instant attraction,.. NO love for you for which I felt"

"Pfft" I let go of Bea's hand and faced the man who was so much taller than me that I had to look up. If that wasn't' enough to infuriate me "LOVe ?"

" what do you know of love" "What have you ever lost or given up because of love? "

"I know-"I interrupted him " No you don't know for you to dirty the word love like that, to confuse love and lust". I chuckled. I thought I had made a new friend but I was wrong. I turned aways from him. " You're just like the other boys- Just like Suga just like HIM"

" Him?" He questioned " Yes " I laughed hysterically. " A monstrous being that only sees what it wants and takes what it wants." The tears welled up in my eyes from my anger and frustration i took a step closer

" A kiss started this huh"

" Yes a kiss but it's so much more than that,'' he said.

" Your being illogical , i mean think about it "

" I did,'' he said, maintaining eye contact with me.

He looked at me and choked . I don't care, I wanted him to hurt. I don't know why but I needed him to feel pain.I needed not to feel this. I couldn't take this anymore. I shook in anger

I laughed as I grabbed his collar pulling him closer. " YOU see you couldn't satisfy me even if just the touch of your hand was like feeling aphrodite flowing through my veins"

" Pfft" he laughed in vain. Yeah and Suga could see his thoughts all over his face.

" A kiss, I've kissed many Monsters none of them are as stubborn as you- your such a waste of air"

" I-I know what I feel for you " He spoke with as much confidence as he could

" You love a girl you kissed once and just learned the name of ?"

"I-i yes I know my own heart" he leaned into my touch.

" You feel with your c***, not with your heart. once you realize that you'll be fine "

I smiled at him as tears fell down my face.

His eyes now glossing over. I could never like a being as pathetic and as useless as you. " Yeah and you can say it a thousand time but that won't change how I fell," he said . "You're Like your stage name a Monster and despite you changing it you're still what you were before "

" No your just afraid even bea knows, " he said

I looked back at her whose eyes pulsed before she looked away. I turned back to him, anger showing on my face. " Fuck you," I said pushing him away. He grabbed my hand pulling me closer, looking me deep into my eyes.

"You may call me names or say I'm being illogical but love is illogical "

I struggled to free myself as his eyes shined with passion and covered up hurt. I smiled embracing my inner bitch before stomping on his foot. He released me and clutching his foot and looked up at me not with haste, not glaring but with pain. my heart wrenched but I kept my mask on.

" I DON'T want OR NEED LOve. not from you not from anyone". I Finally let the tear fall before grabbing Bea's hand and walking easily away.

Bea Pov

I let the images of what had happened float through my mind. I knew that me turning away was my non-verbal confirmation and if she saw it like that too then she most definitely would be mad at me later for agreeing with that mad man. Not only that I was shell shocked. I mean I saw my idols as people but to fall for my best friend and not only one but two and both of them being love at first sight. It was just crazy. I mean I had to admit it. I was a little jealous. These thoughts passed through my head as I watched Azulia through the crowd walking her back facing me it was as if time had slowed and the movie had stopped as she did the once moving frame almost like a living painting had once again become silent and still.

" Ow," I yelped as Azulia tightened her grip on my arm.

I winced in pain taking my eyes off her. Her abrupt stop made my head bump into her as she slowly turned to face me. I was now holding my loose hand on my face. She turned to face me, her face puffy. Her body is not in physical pain but you could tell the encounter had been taking its toll on her mentally. She looks at me, eyes cold, broken yet pulsing. Showing that they are alive yet still they remain dead. Almost as dead as they were that night. The night her whole facade of love came crashing down. The thought of her bloody and in pain at my doorstep passed through my mind as I grabbed her other hand and pulled her into a hug. Her grip on my hand loosens as she returns my hug with a sob. To most, she may have seemed rude for doing what she did. She may have seemed like a bitch to onlookers but she wasn't, she was a broken girl who was doing her best to recover.

" It's okay Zul" was all I could say as I held her tight. I had broken my promise to her and I wouldn't let it happen again. I held her as tightly as I could comforting her as the rain fell and the weather enveloped her and me. Still I held on to her comforting her. Giving her the best affection I could. We stood in the rain even as the rain grew heavy. Once she was done crying she looked up at me

"So you really think I'm afraid "

" No...I don't," I said hugging her

" You don't think I was wrong?" she asked staring down into my eyes, her honey yellow eyes glowing in the darkness.

I laughed. She was still a beautifully innocent shield. Especially in the rain.

" I think you felt cornered and did what you had to and I'm proud of you "

I hugged her, patting her back as she let out all her doubts. I reminded her of how we met in high school and how we jumped out of a two-story building into the pool just to skip class. She smiled at the reminder. I smiled back as she hugged me tightly and I tried to control my shivers.

She sighed, rubbing her eyes, and grabbed my hand.

"Let's go,'' she said, her normal confidence finally peeking through the darkness. She was trying but- no she was trying and that would be enough for now. I smiled as I grabbed onto her arm and we walked back to the hotel hand in hand.

RM Pov

As she walked away from me I stood and couldn't help but cry, as my tears fell to the ground the city grew dark and it rained. I walked to a bar and drowned my pain as I thought of what I had done to make her hate me. As I sat at the bar I felt a familiar hand be placed on my shoulder, it was Suga as he sat next to me I felt hate, rage, and the need to cry. All I wanted to do was cry with my brother, my friend, with my family. He knew somehow what it was that I felt and thought so he asked to go to a private booth and as we sat I broke. I fell into his arms. His lap was my comfort as if he was a mother comforting his child. He shushed me with love and as he did he rubbed my head softly. This is the side no one gets to see but me, not even the other members this is friendship this is the feeling of love without the need for benefit without the need to be fixed and worked on this is what it means to be part of a team. And as I cried out all I could do was clench my fists knowing no matter what I would never be able to tell him it was over Azulia his love the apple of his eye and so I rather than spoke drank more and more throwing back as many drinks as I could before I felt the red of my cheeks and the sting of rejection fading. As I drank I lost control and finally spoke: "My friend my brother I am so sorry for what I've done I'm sorry I've hurt her I'm sorry I've broken your love." as I spoke he held me "Namjoon what is it that you are apologizing for? What have you seen today what has made you so unhinged." his words clicked as I soon began to speak with a sober feel that wasn't present in my last statement that concerned him and so I explained still knowing I wouldn't be able to tell him the truth " I've hurt Bea and now she has left me to be void of love and joy she has truly been broken by me and I was broken by her." he laughed and kissed my head " my friend you fear the worst but the worst is long from here you let your mind wander too far it will all be ok". With this we left the bar and went back to the hotel we both slept but my sleep was interrupted and was long delayed until hours later.

Azulia POV

I had been ignorant of Bea's pain but no more. Her shivering caused me to wake up from my sob story and focus on the truth of the matter. I was being an ass and if I let bea suffer and get drenched in rain wasn't proof enough I don't know what is. I sighed as I grabbed Bea's hand and we walked back to the hotel arm in arm. As we got to the hotel, Bea fell right to sleep as I lay in bed. She was still shivering but she put up with me and that is what made her my best friend. Even if she wanted to hurt me I would forgive her. But as I lay in bed trying to forget, all I could do was remember. So I got up and I went to take a shower as I stepped into the shower the warm water created soft steam around me. I let my head fall against the wall and I stood there, the water falling down onto my head. My body relaxed as the tears began to fall again. Only this time they were tears of shame, I had felt weak, and yet I put my insecurities on him. I had made RM feel like shit. I was the piece of shit that didn't deserve to take up space. All he wanted was to love me and i - I didn't give him the chance I cut him off because of prejudice. I was weak and I didn't deserve a man as honest and as passionate as him. I knew that. I truly did and yet here I still was. Tears fell down my face and the water rinsed it off. as I stood there for hours thinking of him. I knew I had to make it up to him. I had to apologize. Even if he didn't forgive me. I still knew I had to. I finally got out of the shower wet and determined then I got my clothing and put it on and as to not wake Bea I softly shut the hotel door and I ran. As I ran I realized I had no clue where they were staying. So I pulled up a number I hadn't thought I would put to use. Jungkook. He had given it to me and now I needed it. So I called him.