Chapter 3 - Preparations
I jolted upright sweating profusely, having drenched my sheets; a large print of sweat surrounded me. I couldn't help but groan as I peeled the silk comforter clinging to my skin. Swinging my legs back onto the marble floor helped cool my body slightly, but that didn't seem to ease the vivid flash backs of that dream; images of it just kept hurling towards me.
"What the hell was that?" I let out an exasperated sigh, combing my fingers through my hair, attempting to recollect myself.
'Is this an omen? No...no, its just a dream'
The light that, when I'd arrived, poured through the curtains had ceased and was replaced by the pinkish blue light of a sunset, forcing my eyes to adjust. Lifting myself off the king bed sat in the middle of the room I walked to the bathroom in the door towards the right. Opening the door, soft ambient lighting mingled with the pink rays shone through, casting a warm light on the stone floor and marble tops.
At the centre of the room is a large, clawfoot bathtub, I quickly turned the faucet for the cold water all the way. As water gurgles out, I walked towards the sink basin and brushed my teeth, growing tired of the fuzzy plaque lining them. A unfortunate truth was that one of the first things to go in long-lasting, brutal wars was your hygiene.
Rinsing my mouth, I gaze up at myself; without the blood and soil caked over my face, I looked like my father. The same navy blue eyes, the same angular face slightly softened by my age and a defined jawline I can thank my werewolf lineage for. We shared the same jet-black hair; instead, mine reached my shoulders and framed my face like tattered curtains - most days I had it tied up, today was most days.
Groaning slightly as I felt my shoulder throb I finished tying my hair I walked back to the tub and submerged myself. I didn't bother to turn the faucet off. As I sunk in the heat trapped in my body started to lessen and disperse into the cool water. Tipping my head back I let my thoughts run free. After a few moments of what felt like my last supper of peace I sat up, turning the faucet off by very skilfully nudging it with my big toe I began to scrub myself. The sweat, dirt and blood that had wriggled its way through my clothes began to wash away the only proof of its existence left was the murky brown tint of the bath water.
Getting up I quickly dried and dressed myself, eventually I decided on long pants that were tight enough to not get caught on anything but loose enough to not let me get mistaken as a jester. A plain black tunic and long coat seemed fitting for the occasion paired with long sturdy boots that reached just below my knees with laces that tied all the way to the top hidden behind my pants.
As I left the bathroom, I fought the urge to call in a servant and have them pack a bag for me; the last thing I needed was seeming like some incompetent and lazy prince, but I admit I wasn't really sure how to pack for one of the most important and scariest journeys of my life and having someone else do it for me might let my mind rest for a moment.
'No, it wouldn't' .
In the end a satchel with a change of clothes, some toiletries and bandages was all I could manage to shove inside, closing the bag with a dash of aggression while sighing of honest bewilderment and disappointment at my lack of packing or to be honest thinking skills.
"I've never seen you have this much fun, brother." The soft voice that reminded me of daises on a summer day came from a small brunette, looking as adorable as ever, fitted in a purple knee length dress. Embroidered professionally by the kingdoms best sewers with flowers and humming birds in a slightly darker purple, sleeves that passed her hands that flared out at the elbow with holes cut out on the shoulders. My sister; princess Elena Nikkole.
"Well... the prospect of getting cursed by ancient crazy people has always been appealing to me." I tried to sound sarcastic, like I wasn't scared just merely annoyed with how easily I'd save the day. Talk to the crazies save my kingdom as simple as one plus one.
"You don't have to act tough, I'm scared and I'm not even going brother. Plus even if..."
'you fail' she didn't need to finish her motivational speech for me to know its conclusion and she knew it too, she stood their mouth gaping switching from covering her mouth with her arm to tangling them both together a symphony of
"oh no, umm, well, of course no one thinks that, I just " hurling out at me salting my gaping wound.
I don't speak for a while looking down at my wrist examining it, checking my pulse, then the size of my wrist then holding my fingers for a while willing my face to remain still,
"I know you didn't mean it that why I'm just teasing'" I look up at her I feel a dull sting on the corners of my eyes but smile regardless, the way I would when we were kids and I didn't want her to cry.
I see her body relax, shoulders falling and her eyes scanning to see whether or not I meant my words,
"Okay.." she sighs out a smile of relief emerging.
"You scared me" she said lightly punching my shoulder plopping herself onto my bed.
"How long will this mission take any way? The way mum made it seem, I wouldn't be surprised if you were gone for a year." Elena stated on assessing my room again as if it was her first time here swinging her feet leisurely. "Oh and that reminds me you need to go see mother, she is ever so slightly distraught" she whispered out with a mischievous grin as if she'd remembered something oh so funny.
"Great... I was hoping to miss the tornado that is our mother" I replied leaning onto my dresser stationed beside the door.
"I knew you were a dreamer brother but I never imagined to this extent" she chuckled out before falling dramatically backwards thrusting her hands up and examining them.
I can't help but smile at her, father was right to conceal the true extent of the war. I didn't understand at the time and I admit sometimes I still doubt but seeing someone you love be this carefree even though your terrified inside makes it all seem worth it for a moment... but just a moment.
'Why do I want people to suffer with me?'
I scrunch my face at the thought turning my head towards the window gazing into the bleak darkness of the night, void of any stars just a moon gazing at me. I gaze back.
"Violet told me to tell you she says goodbye and to stay safe." Elena says directing my gaze back to her as she hops up and off my bed.
"Tell your wolf Violet thank you and for her to train well." I reply garnering a blushed chuckle from Elena.
"She can already hear you, silly" With that she runs out the room most likely to join mother for dinner. I hated that she had to tell me what Violet her wolf says to her, unbeknown to the public I was not born with a wolf or with one that I could talk to and accompany me through the world. Wolves have their wolves through their entire life guiding them till you grow up then becoming life long companions.
As I leave my room, bag in hand towards the dining hall a memory resurfaces of my 10th birthday, I assume my parents had been worried for a while I'd never introduced my wolf to anyone and when other kids told me about theirs I was bewildered. My parents worked up the courage to ask, looking back it was probably so frightening for them, not because of my possible reaction but for fear their son was broken or not enough. My mother showed a warm smile when I assured her I wasn't hearing voices but that's not what shook me to my core, even when I heard her sobbing alone later that night.
It was my fathers face full of shock, fear and pity. I never truly understood his reaction; simply catalogued it as another way I didn't measure up, but now every time I shift, I realize there is no other soul I'm switching with; instead the goddess simply shoved a dead carcass into me. It disgusts me.
"Are you alright darling" my feet had taken me to the archway of the dining hall and from the look on my mothers face already misty from tears I hadn't just arrived. She stood and briskly walked towards me her auburn hair trailing behind her, hands gripping her floor length dress. She embraced me before I could dodge thankfully I wasn't crying simply just a bit spaced out.
"I knew this was too much, look I'll tell your father you don't have to do a single thing. Okay? I'll.. I'll go on a hunger strike he can't make you go." I felt her heart racing looking at the top of her head rambling into my shoulder.
Slowly escaping from her grip I attempt to placate her chuckling out "It's alright mother... plus I chose to go, father didn't force me"
'He doesn't have that much hope in me'.
"Clack!" both me and my mother turn to see where the noise came from and it's my sister her plate shattered on the floor various meats she had probably spent the last ten minutes pilling up now sprawled onto the floor. Hands up holding her now imagery plate,
"What? Broth...Brother why would you go if fathers not forcing you, have you not read the history books the guides are tricksters." Mother's face paled at Elena words and I took great care to suppress memories of what the guides had accomplished through the years.
"Elena, Mother... please trust me I wouldn't go if I didn't have to" I never was good at selling myself or commanding but as I got older and the pressure of being not just an alpha a 'born leader' but being heir to one of the largest werewolf kingdoms I further hid inside myself. Unless a life was at stake I couldn't act. Thankfully I had hope in my fighting abilities those guides couldn't kill me, and the people that could hurt me the most I was leaving here.
" I came to bid you farewell mother, I'll return shortly with good news." I said curtly stepping away from them both almost out of their sight.
"No...no Cain. Well... at least have dinner my son, tell me about your valiant deeds outside the walls." her whispers sounded as if I was disappearing in front of her.
'I can't stay any longer I'll lose my nerve'.
"I can't mother if I want to arrive by the guides at day break I need to leave now... please." as I spoke I tried to apologize to both of them with my eyes, telling them I love them with my smile and bidding them all the good fortune and luck I have left with a wave turning and walking away but my spirt felt as if I was running.
I was thankful I had carried my bag with me the less time I spent waiting around the less chance I had to reconsider my choices. Sadly I wasn't scot free as I approached the front gate the soft clicks of my mothers heels along the marble sang growing louder until my hand reached the handle and she was directly behind me.
"I don't want you to go, but it seems even if it's just to ease your mind... You must." she whispered as I turned around and felt her warm hand caress my cheek.
"Here" she said softly placing a book in my hand,
"I asked Stephen to gather all the information of the guides and a rough... rough estimation of where they may be. I don't want you to go in knowing nothing."
"Thank you mother... I'll be safe don't worry."
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I retrieved Lucky tied outside the horse's stables, fitted with a sleeping bag and a sack filled with rations. A saddle was already fitted and after I gave Lucky a well deserved brushing I mounted and began the small trot out of the kingdom. Left hand on the rein, and with the right I opened the book my mother gave me so I could figure out where the hell I was going.