Ep. 87 - Surprise Visit, Lazing Around, Treasure Hunt

And so, we reincarnated Rebs with her plethora of wishes. I had Vados bring her to Rivendell in the Lord of the Rings universe and deal with genderbending the main cast.

"So, dear. Mind telling me more about your childhood friend?" asked a very scary Merlin.

"S-sure! We lived in the same neighborhood and often played together. We went to different schools though. In the end, we attended the same university, then I died and reincarnated."

"Yes… We will talk about the 'reincarnation' stuff later. I checked her mind already and she was smitten with you. It's fine for her to join us. Actually, I kinda want to go to this Lord of the Rings universe, so we will be joining her. I should also get to know the new wife better." said Weiss. She stopped time in this universe and we opened a portal to Rivendell as well. Right next to Rebs.

"Surprise!" I said as I exited the portal. Rebecca looked at me and frowned.

"Don't you have some Godly stuff to do? You stalker…"

"That's harsh! And I have nothing to do, so we will be staying with you. Actually, this world's story is quite amusing…" I checked that everyone exited the portal, then continued. "Yang here is the Origin of Adventures, while Pyrrha is the Origin of War, so this world is perfect for both. Jaune is also the Origin of Determination, so he will appreciate the Fellowship of the Ring. Boromir a little less, probably."

"How about the elves? Won't they be suspicious of around thirty strangers?"

"Oh, dear! We are Gods, remember? You should get used to us doing whatever the fuck we want! I already manipulated these guys' memories so that we always existed according to them. Actually, I already got a mansion for us, though it will actually lead to the Tower, since that is much more comfortable than a shabby elf house." I said and started walking towards our humble abode, which was anything but humble.

"Ugh, fine! I just wanted to have some fun before becoming a Goddess and all that… Anyway, where are we in the timeline?"

"Let's see… Oh, we are just a couple of years before the marriage between Elrond and Celebrìan. Around 107 years into the Third Age. Ooh, this is making my collector senses tingle! Are you all thinking what I am thinking?" I asked towards the gang.

They smiled and Sun said: "Let's go on a little treasure hunt, shall we?"

"Exactly my thoughts. Let's get settled a moment here in Rivendell, then we can start an in-depth exploration and sacking. Oh, so many centuries since we went on a treasure hunt! Reminds me of when we were weak mortals and nothing more..."

"Well, we never were that weak. With magic and without cultivation, we could have easily contended with a Divine Origin Realm existence." said Jaune.

"I also want to see an elf wedding! In Remnant weddings are just kinda… Eh, they are not great." said Ruby.

"Yeah, we still didn't have a proper ceremony… We should all get married again." said Freya.

At any rate, we quickly found our mansion and entered our Tower. Since I liked the scenery of Rivendell, I made it so that the many windows in the Tower showed the elven refuge in all of its glory. Rebs seemed jealous of my wives who were already cuddling with me, so she started cultivating very seriously. Well, it took like… Maybe five minutes until she reached Divine Extinction Realm.

"Congratulations, one quick bath in the 'primordial soup' and you will be a Goddess." I said while flipping through a novel I found from this universe. Did you know that Men had some very interesting authors? Oh, and their exploration journals are quite interesting.

"Already?! Shouldn't this take years?!" Rebs said, dumbfounded by her progress.

"Hey, you are using a cultivation technique I made specially for you and are cultivating right next to almost thirty Concept Origins in my Tower, which produces an entire universe's worth of energy every nanosecond! Plus, did you seriously think that I, as an overprotective, over-doting, borderline yandere husband, could ever stay away from my wife for more than a few hours? Well, I can, but I don't want to."

"You are quite different from what I remember. Also, I meant to ask this before, but why the eyepatch? Are you a chuuni?"

"Hey, Rebecca, I might act like a chuuni sometimes to try and be funny, but I am not. I was careless during a fight and my eye got cut. Then, after I evolved, my race changed so that I can't heal it even if I wanted to. And, this isn't just an eyepatch. It's equipment made from the Origin of Blacksmithing herself." I said, pointing towards Hephaestus, who was getting it on with Musashi. I then created a cocoon of 'primordial soup' and covered Rebs with it. I wanted to make sure that she absorbed just the amount she could support. I also sped up time, so she was done in less than a second. Before she could become a Goddess, I stopped time, except for me and her.

"Rebs, by becoming a Goddess, you will take a very big step and will never be able to go back. Are you sure you want to continue? Also, the thing about becoming my wife-"

"Stop right there. Tu, we have known each other for what? Almost twenty years? Are you seriously going to act all cold right now?" she asked, then took a deep breath. "I was in love with you, you know? I wanted you to take the first step, but I would have confessed myself on your 20th birthday. I thought it would make a nice 'birthday gift'. Becoming a Goddess doesn't faze me at all if I can be one with you."

There were no lies. I guess I was fortunate and unfortunate to die early…

"Tu, huh? A long time since I was called that… Well then, what will your dominant law be? It might affect your personality just a little, just so that you know."

"I'm going to go for… Hm… 'Sins and Virtues', if possible."

"Balance, then. When I have time move again, you will begin the process to become the 'Origin Goddess of Primordial Balance'. After that, you will experience a couple of evolutions and become the Origin of Balance. Actually, that might be impossible right now, but you will easily become a Demon Empyrean."

"I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about, but I'm ready."

I had time move again and sped up time around Rebs. "Voice, once she finishes becoming a Goddess, start giving her Skills and the possible evolutions."

[As you wish, Master. May I suggest that you give her a bloodline before the evolutions? It might help make some requirements to become a Concept Origin more easily achievable.]

"Let's do that then."

By the end of the day, Rebs had become the 'Original Demon Empyrean of Original Balance' with a 'Seeker of Balance Bloodline'. Her soul wasn't anywhere near the requirement for evolution, just like everything else. I had her erase all life on this planet and restore it a couple of times to have her become a Demon Empyrean. Since she's the only one in this universe, she also became an Original Empyrean, like me. What a cool thing.

Well, Rebecca was a little pissed when she discovered that all of her wishes were now basically useless since she is Omnipotent. Well, she was excited to get a Spirit and Familiar, so she quickly chose Van Gogh. Since she also needed a familiar, I remembered something about the Spirit Realm I had taken from the Martial God Asura universe, so I did a quick modification to the strongest feline-type Beast Spirit I could find. Well, I made the kitty a mixture of the strongest of the strongest Spirits from all worlds, just with a female kitten body. It is insanely strong and cute, so Rebs loved it. She has a thing for cats.

On the topic of familiars, Nagai, my owl friend, started developing some intelligence and her cultivation speed started picking up in pace. What a good little owl, I will have to reward her with some headpats. Diana was pleased with this world's dragons, on the other hand. They were weak, but considering the overall strength of this place, they were the top of the food chain.

And so, I spent the rest of the night with my eight, correction, nine wives. Never would have thought to reunite with someone I know and get another wife in a single day. Welp, that happened, and I am not going to complain a single bit. Weiss was particularly interested in my past, as in before reincarnating, but there isn't much stuff to talk about. I was just a regular everyday normal motherfucker. Maybe a little too introverted, but can you fault me for that? Society sucks!

Anyway… Forget that and let's go on, shall we? The next day, I woke up as usual submerged in bodies. I checked with Omniscience and they wouldn't wake up until a couple of hours later, so I went back to sleep.

When I woke up again, I found that Ais and Neo arrived and snuggled up to me as well. Ah, my daughters are adorable. Total father-cons, but adorable nonetheless. And could you ever blame them? The only males Ais has ever been close to are me, Jaune, Sun, and Ren. And her father, but he's dead, so he doesn't count. As for Neo… I don't know. Well, I do look like a 20-something year-old, so I guess she might have some sort of attraction. Huh, I should probably have a talk with them.

At any rate, we all slowly woke up and had a quick bite with Rebs. She still has some human habits ingrained in her. Guess that we will have some more barbecues in this universe.

After breakfast, we started to set out from Rivendell, not before meeting Elrond.

"Lord Elrond, good day." I said, attracting his attention. I have nothing against the man, so I might as well address him properly. He was strolling around with some aides, enjoying the morning's calm.

"Oh, Master Tula. Good day to you." he responded

"We will be leaving Rivendell for a bit. Don't worry, we will be back before your wedding. We won't miss it."

"Wedding?" he asked

"Oh, you should be married to Lady Galadriel's child within three years. I thought you knew?"

"News to me. Joyous news for sure. I have always loved Lady Celebrìan… Well, your visions have always proven to be true, so I have nothing to worry about. Have a pleasant journey and may you find what you desire, Master Tula." he said. Ah, how well I programmed him. I have passed our powers off as very powerful Magi. I purposefully used a different term so that we don't become suspicious when wizard standards get used on us. To them, it would becoming like measuring cattle in pumpkins: it would make no sense. Perfect plan, as expected of my dear Loki. She came up with this yesterday night. I had just used 'wizard' which, in hindsight, would have been a sub-optimal idea.

"Oh, I am sure that we will find many interesting things… Well, we shall leave now, Lord Elrond, a long trek awaits us." I said. We exchanged a quick handshake and went on our way.

Like so started a two years long adventure, plotting every single inch of the Middle Earth and taking every single treasure we could find, except the One Ring. We still want the adventure, after all. That's why I cursed Gollum when I found him. Or rather, when I found one of his family line, probably some ancestor. I cursed him to respect the owner of the One Ring, with the exception of Déagol. He will therefore stop troubling Bilbo and, later, Frodo. He will actually serve them.

We collected thousands of items, in particular ancient weaponry since they were absolutely beautiful. Their art pieces were… Ugly as fuck, so they were left alone. I took some interesting books in their original copies, so that I could add them to our private collection. The Tower has copies exposed throughout, while we have some of the more interesting tomes in their original copies in a private library. Did you think that I would let some mortal put their dirty paws on my books? Are you mad?

I was saying? Ah, yes, weapons. I basically took every single interesting weapon of Elven, Human, and other origin. Orc, Goblin, and such weapons were incredibly crude, but there were some actually really nice pieces, which I obviously nabbed. We also found some very interesting jewels, which were obviously Elven, and we took them. I didn't care too much about the names or legends attached to them. Those are ours now. Oh, the alcohol, let's not forget about the alcohol. We also took the Rings of Power and modified them a little, so that any kind of attachment to Sauron was eliminated. Some had lost their power already, so we restored them. Hecate loved those since they were made by mortals but quite good. You don't see magical artifacts like these every day. Well, we could because we are Gods, but we are too lazy for that.

We mapped out every single inch of the Middle Earth and started circulating the maps we made. Once again, we started the legend of the 'Wandering Cartographers of Rivendell'. There were many places that people had yet to discover, which we arbitrarily named as we pleased, so things which included our names. Oh, we also met some scaled lizards, like that cutie named Smaug. Diana had a little chat with them, which included several slaps with her fluffy tail since they were lazy bums.

I was getting a little curious about some new evolutions so, after almost two years from our departure from Rivendell, I talked with the Voice.

'Voice, what are the requirements for our next evolutions?'

[Master, I unfortunately do not know. I was able to give you the requirements last time because you were already close to achieving them. It is something you would consider instinctual. I will inform you when I understand the requirements.]

'Good job.' And so I discovered that we have no clue how to progress. I mean, not that we need to. Actually, we were already plenty strong as Origin Gods, but it was fun becoming stronger. It feels like a high every time we complete an evolution. Plus, it gives a sense of achievement. We all worked hard to become strong. Ok, maybe the gang didn't work as hard as me. And I cheated, so basically I did zero work. But still, we had to think about how to become stronger, so we did do some work.

Anyway, it was about time for us to go back to Rivendell. We will celebrate Elrond's wedding, then I will use a little bit time laws to directly wait for Gandalf and Bilbo's arrival. We will be following both the Dwarves and the Fellowship of the Ring, since both sound fun.