Ep. 101 - Players, Crystal, Dream

Ok, so I'll just sum everything that happened until now so that everyone's on the same page.

We were in the crossover universe I created and decided to leave for a newer, more interesting universe. Asuna entered the Tower of Knowledge through, I guess, the ALO connection and told us that Kirito has been kidnapped. Great news, the Underworld is kinda interesting, so it's worth the time. Plus, waifu located. We entered the Underworld the day of the Final Load Test and had fun cutting through a few hundred thousand enemies. Then, I talked with Sheta a little, basically conned her into becoming a Goddess aka my wife, though she doesn't know yet, and finally went towards the 'World End Altar', stopping to 'face' the Pugilists and sunbathe a little.

Now, with the summary out of the way, we were all 'posing' (is that a fucking JoJo's reference?), waiting for the Players to connect to the Underworld from all over the planet. I had swung around the saber to get a feel for it and I must say that it's weird. I mean, you have quite a heavy hilt, and a basically non-existent blade. It's like swinging around a rolled-up newspaper or something. Took a couple of swings to get the feel for it, but after that it's all smooth sailing. I took my place in the center of our formation and holstered my lightsaber. I decided to not store it in 'Polemos Techne', since I have too many weapons already stored in it, and it might be good to have a weapon per hand, instead of being limited to only one. Well, I initially made 'Polemos Techne' to limit myself, so I guess it's working…

"Oh, here they come…" I said as a series of red 'beacons' formed on the other side of the moat we created a few hours ago.

"Damn, that's creepy…" murmured Jaune. Well, it is. It looks as if the Players' bodies were made by coagulated blood or something similar…

The ones that were already 'logged in' were looking around and trying to find some friends, I guess, but it was quite difficult due to the absence of Player ID's. We waited a few seconds until all of the first wave of Players arrived.

"Those are all people from Kirito-senpai's world?" asked Ronye

"Yup, but you don't have to worry about harming them. They are using a 'Sacred Art' to keep their real bodies safe. Think of this as your graduation exam: kill and live, simple as that." I said, not worrying about telling her she'd be safe even if they swarmed her. Kid needs to grow a pair, even though she's a girl.

"Y-yes! Uncle Tula!" Oh, such a good child!

Well, seeing that everyone was here, I whistled loudly, attracting every Player's attention.

"Invaders! You are not to cross these sacred bridges! Death awaits those that do infringe on this sacred ground!" I shouted with a deep, commanding voice.

'Ooh, that voice got me all hot and bothered. Take responsibility for this tonight!' said Rebecca with a mental message. Heh, my knightly voice was on point then.

Those idiots started murmuring about a 'raid' and forming impromptu 'raiding parties' or how to access the 'interface' and so on. God, they are useless beings… Oh, some idiot is trying to sneak in from behind us. I looked other to Scheta and nodded. She smiled just a little and 'blinked' to the unfortunate nobody who will not be remembered by anyone. The very moment the Player set foot on the 'sacred land', he was cut up in very, very little pieces, leaving behind a bloody mess, which discouraged the other invaders.

Seeing this as her cue, Hinata used the Voice to create an impromptu system for the players. A quick 'tutorial' later, the bridges were being swarmed by Players.

'Excellent job, my dear Hinata. What quest did you give them?' I asked mentally

'Oh, nothing special. I just said that whoever kills one of us will have free access to the game for life, one month before anyone else, and a set of 'Divine'-ranked gear.'

'Yeah, that ought to work. Gamers are such mindless creatures: you put the words 'gear', 'free', and 'ranked' and you give them the best motivation. At this point, even a quest that states 'kill yourself' would be popular.' added Loki from the side.

'You are familiar with these beings?' asked Scheta. Oh? She's gotten the hand of these messages earlier than I thought.

'Yup, we enjoyed toying with them a few universes back. They are basically mindless beasts when it comes to tasks and will stop in front of nothing and no one to accomplish their 'quests'. A nice bunch of playthings and practice targets.' answered Yang.

After that mental discussion, we turned our back to the bridges and walked towards the center of the 'sacred grounds'. Hinata created a glowing, red 'Boss Area' around the center of the place, which got the Players even more riled up as the 'encounter' was starting.

"You guys take the sides. leave these ones in front to me." I said, putting a hand on my new lightsaber. I need to think of a name for this. I started playing with my weapon, throwing it up and down, eyeing the invaders. The gang nodded and disappeared, which was followed by screams, warcries, and heavy thumps as the Players were massacred. This left me, smiling ominously, and a bunch of freaked out Players.

"I did say that 'death awaits', didn't I? You can't blame me now!" I said and ignited my lightsaber.

"A lightsaber? Wasn't this a Fantasy game?!" shouted some guy

"Oh, this is no game, boy. This is simply a different dimension."

"Wait, that guy… He's from SAO! The Origin God guy!" shouted a woman somewhere in the backlines.

"Oh, you remember me? How nice of you. I won't kill you too brutally then."

"We're fucked..."

I dashed towards the closest player and slashed at him. Oh, the satisfying sound the blade did as it cut through the armor was… Satisfying. Shitty choice of words. I continued hacking and slashing, getting a better feel for the weapon and what kind of Noble Phantasm I wanted to implement in it. I am thinking of some kind of remote detonation kind of thing, but we'll see. Ooh, maybe overcharging the crystal inside and making a pirated version of 'Excalibur'? Overused, but effective for sure… Eh, I'll think of it afterwards, when Hephy reworks the weapon.

Totally by chance, I heard Sun shout: "Konnichiwa, motherfuckers! Meet my spear, it's friendly! Oh, tell Lady Death that I said 'hi'!"

What… The fuck? I seriously think he needs a psychotherapist. Maybe I need one as well, but we'll see. Today I'm feeling like procrastinating…

Oh, someone actually took a proper stance with the sword. A weaboo? Nah, I doubt one of… Those, would be able to wield a sword properly. Kendo? Looks like it, so maybe a highschooler? I punched a guy that came at me screaming, sending him into the moat, then took a stance against this guy.

"Come on, I'll humor you."

The Player said nothing and tried advancing slowly towards me. Ugh, he seriously took this as a 1-on-1? Naive child. Hinata came in from the sky and pierced the Kendo practitioner with her spear.

"My dear, are you incapable of killing these pests?" she asked with a smirk

"Oh, indeed I am! What a shame, but I am just a normal Headmaster, totally not a strong guy!"

"Bullshit!" shouted every single player that heard me.

"Pfft! Sure, Headmaster… How about you get rid of these guys and punish us naughty schoolgirls. And I want a barbecue." she said and disappeared back to her own area.

"Well, that is great motivation to hunt you guys down."

"NPCs like kinky roleplay? When was that implemented?" asked a guy from the side. I didn't care enough to respond and started dashing left and right, leaving bisected bodies as a trail. It was pretty fun, to be honest. The Players had better tactics than the normal enemies we faced recently and could respond better to the changes in battle. Well, that is if we held back in terms of speed, otherwise they wouldn't be able to even see us, much less react.

Since I found it entertaining, I lowered the output and temperature of my lightsaber and had it become as tough as the Players' weapons. This meant that I locked swords with those that managed to react in time. It was fun seeing them struggle to keep a hold on their swords as I used their own blades to cut into their helmets. Ah, their screams were delightful! An S? Me? What?! Ludicrous! I would never hurt a fly! Well, I consider these guys bacteria at best, so they don't count… Literally. They are like a bacteria colony proliferating on a petri dish, just that the petri dish is a planet or universe. Pesky mortals.

Oh? There's a guy with a katana. But he's an amateur, probably a weeb. Hm… I am hearing a voice that tells me 'toy with him, toy with him…' over and over, so I am going to do that. I started clearing out the remaining players, leaving only this weaboo.

"Hey, are you a weeb? Tell me, why a katana?"

"I don't think I am a weeb. Sure, I watch some anime, but it's not like I live off of it or am obsessed. I have probably only seen the mainstream series… As for the katana, well, it looked cool on the equipment selection screen, so I went for that."

"Hm… Fair response. I'll give you a choice. Logout or fight?"

"I'll try fighting, I want to understand why everyone was screaming their lungs out. Plus, I heard someone saying 'Origin God'. You're the guy that gave those Japanese the cool gadgets and pets, right?"

"The one and only." I said, then slowly walked up to him. He tried doing a quickdraw strike, but his blade got stuck in the scabbard. He was struggling to get it out. "Uhm, need a hand?"

"Actually, just kill me already. God, this is embarrassing." I can't really deny that, so I beheaded him. With that, the last of the Players died… Sounds much more dramatic than it should be.

I regrouped with the gang and we shared our experiences a little.

"So? Any notable enemies?" I asked

"None. They were cowards. After the first few slashes, no one dared advance." said Scheta. Poor girl… I patted her head to make her feel better.

"On my side, they were all just rushing forward without much coordination. I saw that that was the case for most of you." said Pyrrha

"Me and Tiese were swarmed by enemies, but they were shouting nonsense like 'Kawaii!' or 'Cute is justice!'. There was this one creep that said: 'I will protect you, milady!', then died right after. Are they mentally challenged, Uncle Tula?" said Ronye innocently

"Yes, Ronye. Those people are mentally challenged and, when you get to Kirito's world, you are always allowed to scream 'Stranger danger!' and slap the shit out of them, if they get too close. Make sure to always keep a whistle on you and use it if they don't flee." I said and she nodded vigorously.

Weiss, Ruby, and Freya just sighed, while Loki and Yang were snickering thinking about the fates of many weebs when Ronye and Tiese are introduced to the world.

"On my side, the 'Players' seemed to want to capture me." said Alice

"Well, yes. You are currently the most important person from the Underworld. Those players were probably tasked to capture you by the leader of the Dark Territory."

"Wait, what has the Dark Territory got to do with all this?" she asked

"Did I forget to mention it? Vecta, the emperor guy, is from the 'real' world and he wants you. Eh, you'll see when we get out of here. Speaking about getting out of here, I guess that we could get rid of the rest of the Dark Army, then skedaddle."

"Where did 'skedaddle' come from? Anyway, it's fine by me. But, first let me check out that weapon." said Hephaestus. I handed her my lightsaber. She immediately zoned out and started disassembling and reassembling the stuff. Now that I think about it, I made the strongest base crystal, but I should be able to make it better by meditating on it. I'll spend a few googols doing that.

"I am fine with that. I had enough fun for a while." said Pyrrha.

The rest of the gang were fine with whatever I decided, as usual, so we will be spending the night in the Tower of Knowledge, then deal with the remnants of the army tomorrow with calm.

And so, the crystal. Obviously I am talking about my personalized lightsaber crystal. Hephaestus was done modifying my saber into an Origin-killer weapon right after we decided to end it here today. She will also take charge of making one for each of the others, completely personalized, obviously. It's a good thing that we don't need to exactly follow any of the physical constraints that would usually apply to a lightsaber since, you know, we are Gods.

I'm digressing. Wow, how many years passed since I last did so? Let's go back a few minutes.

I made a portal to the Tower and Amethyst helped our mortal guests get settled. Scheta had already settled in my room. Apparently she thought she was already my wife… I am not complaining, just thought it would take her some more time. Once that was done, I sat on my throne and started meditating on the crystal in a time-dilation bubble. Theoretically, Jedi and Sith scrubs have to use the Force to refine the crystals, but I have something better: Omni Energy. Hehe, perks of being a God.

I got that down, but what exactly am I searching for? Do I just push it in and hope for the best? Goddammit, I have all the knowledge from all Star Wars universes and nowhere is there written what I have to do precisely. It's all philosophical bullshit of 'finding the way', 'the path will open', and kumbaya bullshit. Ugh, I already hate the Jedi… Holocrons exist for a fucking reason, asshats. Oh well, I have nothing to lose. I might actually try something else.

You know, I didn't want to spend too much time since I knew that Hephy would have to modify it before using it as a main weapon, so I just searched for the best combination of materials and created a crystal, which is theoretically the 'strongest'. Now, I should probably spend some time making the best of the best. Obviously, I can fuse several crystals together while eliminating any weaknesses, but that would only cause an increase in overall 'stats'. I am searching for some kind of 'hidden stat' or 'skill'. I started with making the actually best crystal I could. I used everything: every material, every kind of nanomachine, every kind of spell and formation, every kind of engraving, energy concentration, etc. I probably spent a few decades just doing that. Trying every single combination in the Omniverse is an extensive task. In the end, I of course succeeded. I created the best base crystal for me. I called it Akasha's Crystal just because I could see the illusion of a library on the inside of the sky blue crystal.

Now comes the meditating. I don't know what to do, so I guess that I will just flood the time-dilation bubble with Omni Energy and hope for the best. Maybe I will use my Spirit Sense to investigate the crystal and learn something. Using Omniscience would defeat the purpose of meditation. Anyway, first million years, I found that the crystal was actually absorbing Omni Energy and attuning itself to the law of Knowledge, which is great, so I started adding some law of Knowledge to the Omni Energy, just to speed up the process. Well, my discoveries stopped there for a few hundred trillion years. Then, I found that the crystal had developed a connection to the Origin of Knowledge, which is me. It was nice, I felt closer to it, as if it was a part of me. Just to be sure, I tried cracking the crystal, but nothing happened to me, so I repaired it. Now I am sure that I won't be affected in case the crystal is broken. I also discovered that I can actually summon it through the connection, so I won't ever have to worry about it being stolen, even if the chances are close to none.

The crystal continued absorbing energy for a few googols, shining always brighter than before. It was a pretty cool scene, like holding a miniature star in my hands. It fuels my Godly ego. I actually understood what those hippies meant by meditating on the crystal. It was just understanding the properties and enhancing those that were beneficial to me while reducing those that were detrimental, if not completely changing it. My crystal was basically a self-evolution crystal, which automatically stores and perfects any and all techniques I encounter, whether I myself use them, or I witness them. And I have access to all techniques in the Omniverse. Pretty darn nice. I could also refine it further through Knowledge Law Energy from the Tales of Demons and Gods universe. What a development!

Anyway, I was done with my meditation, so I placed it back in my lightsaber, checked that it worked fine, then burst my time-dilation bubble. Now that I think of it, I could have simply stopped time… Hm, I'm stupid sometimes. I went to my room and found my wives there, including our new addition, Scheta.

"Did you finish with that crystal? You've spent way too much time on it." said Weiss

"Well, I did, but the final product was worth it." I said and ignited the weapon.

"My eye color? Is that some kind of subliminal message?" she asked playfully

"Hm… Maybe I'm asking for a reward, what do you think?"

"I think that you should go easy on Scheta, but we can arrange a little reward, dear."

I had a very pleasant night with my wives. I had to enlarge the bed though, because it's getting cramped.

There was just a little 'disturbance', if you could call it that: once Scheta had fallen asleep, she soon started shivering and muttering gibberish. I was worried for her, so I stopped time for all but the two of us, then dived into her dreams.

There, I saw a crying Scheta surrounded by the cut corpses of several people including me and the gang. I went close to her and hugged the girl, no, woman. I started caressing her hair, as I usually do when comforting girls. I changed the surroundings to the far reaches of space, near a gaseous nebula, and added a few aesthetic details. I surely didn't want my wife in a wasteland surrounded by mutilated corpses.

After some time she calmed down, but continued clinging to me.

"Does this happen often? The dream, I mean." she nodded. "Have you ever tried talking with someone? Bercouli maybe?" she shook her head. "Want to talk a little with me then?" she nodded again. I let her have all the time she needed to think.

"I was never scared of my slashing tendency, but then I saw your corpses and I felt like the world just… Lost all meaning."

"So it has never been a problem until now? There were many corpses back there…"

"No, those people weren't important to me. They were just things I slashed."

"Then doesn't this mean that you care about us, about me?" she nodded. "You don't have to be scared about hurting us. You are my wife now, and I can't have you being sad or scared of yourself. As long as I exist, you don't have to worry. Free yourself from this fear."

"It's not that easy." she said, half laughing half crying.

"Then how about this: you are you, right? You are Scheta and no one else. As long as you know that you don't want to hurt us, isn't it fine? You are familiar with incarnation and intent, so think of it as losing the intent to slash us and gaining the intent of protecting us. Let us become something that you want to protect with your skills, not damage. I promise that you are already a treasure to me, just like the other girls. I will always do anything for you." she started crying again. Hm… Why do I feel that every girl I pick up is always in need of a philosophical, 'I-am-here-for-you' kind of talk? Am I some kind of 'traumatic past' magnet?

"You really think highly of yourself if you want me to change my entire perspective like that…"

"Well, of course. I am your husband, after all, and a possessive one at that. I always want to be my wifey's top priority. Of course, together with your own passions, goals, and so on, I am not a slavemaster."

"You know that I am not very expressive, or talkative for that matter, right?"

"Yup."

"Then are you sure that you want me? A defective person?"

"Hm, let me see… You don't look defective to me. You look like Scheta. And, it's a little too late to ask me that, don't you think? You are already mine, so I won't let you go no matter what."

"Your words are somewhat scary, and somewhat comforting. Feels like I… Can… Trust… Y...ou…" she said while drifting to sleep. Good: if she's asleep in her dream, then she's completely relaxed now. I exited her mind and made time move again. I kept Scheta close to me that night.