Thirty

Josh arrived home from the wedding to meet Trevor at his porch. "What is he doing here ?" Josh thought.

"I've already ended things with him in New York...clearly told him I didn't wanna see him again after that....seeing him now made me reminisce our time together yeah he was sweet but he wasn't the one I wanted...can't he understand and stop hurting himself".

Josh parked his car and the tires screeching alerted Trevor so he turned over with a smile plastered on his face. Josh walked over to where he stood.

"Baby..." Trevor cooed.

"What baby ?...why are you here? " Josh impatiently asked.

"I missed you and I just got back from Amsterdam so I came by to see you" He said placing his hand in Josh's shoulder.

"Why would you come by here and how do you even know my house ?" Josh inquired shrugging him off.

"I have my ways babe and you know I really like you."

"And you know I don't reciprocate those feelings !"

"I know deep down you do, you're just blinded by him cause you've fancied him longer than you've known me...give me a chance and trust me I'll be better than him"

"Trevor ! Plea..."

Trevor kissed him him shut locking his waist with his big hands and pulling him closer. This action surprised what ever complaints Josh had. Josh lost absolute control as Trevor dominated his mouth, kissing like a hungry lion...savage wild beast. Trevor had pinned him on the door to his house and now he lifted Josh's arms and placed it on his own shoulders, deepening the kiss. After getting a satisfactory taste he withdrew his lips then whispered to Josh to open the door, nibbling his ear lobe as he did so. His whisper sent shivers and Josh obeyed, his body was in full control now...his mind stopped working.

****

Jake finally got himself after standing out there for a while. He got into his car and drove off without even informing Jules. He drove to Owens and rang the doorbell and knocked the door numerously but got no reply, he kept ringing and would have called Owen but he had blocked him earlier on. He banged the door so hard, so much that Yj's mom had to pop her head out to know what was going on. Owens car was still parked outside so he definitely was in the house. Jake was still at the door when Amelia and Yj came back from the gym.

"What's up Jake" Amelia asked noticing how weary he looked.

"I've been trying...to reach your brother but I haven't been able to " Jake said.

"Okay...what happened " she said observing his appearance....worry was written all over his face as well as guilt.

"I really need to talk to him...clear stuff with him" Jake replied.

" I suggest you go home and wait till he's ready to talk to you...ready to listen to whatever you have to tell him"

"It might be too late !"

"Too late how ?..." 'does my brother want to commit suicide...no no...that can't be"

She banged the door too and fumbled with her purse to bring out her own keys. After rummaging through it with shaky hands, she found the keys, fixed it in the keyhole and dashed into the house straight to Owens room. Jake would have tagged along but Yj tapped him.

"It's best you wait for them to come out"

"Yeah"' good idea'

Amelia found Owen on the bed under the covers, do she dived the bed to feel his pulse. He was pulsing perfectly well and his breathing too.

"Relief !!" She breathed.

"What is it ?" He mumbled.

"Have you been crying ?" She asked noticing his change of voice.

"No...I have a little cough"

"Okay...should I make tea for you ?"

"No...I'm fine !"

"Jake is outside. Should I let him in ?"

"No...I don't want to see him"

"Please tell me what happened "

"I'll tell you later...make sure he leaves this instant"

"I'll do that !"

Amelia went out and Jake was still outside

"Jake you've got to leave " she said to him.

"Can't I just speak with him"

"You can't cause he doesn't want to see you or hear what you have to say...makes me wonder what you did...if you hurt my brother I'll find you and murder you ..."

"It's...

"Leave now please" Yj said and his mom came out now.

"What's going on here...you guys have been making a lot of noise" Yh's mom said.

"It's nothing mom...I'll handle it" Yj said.

"Handle what...is this man causing trouble" she asked Amelia.

"He was...but he'll leave now !" Amelia replied to her but glared straight at Jake.

Jake roamed his hand through his hair and backed off. He left the apartment and waited in his car for a while as he didn't feel like leaving yet. He kept staring at Owens floor.

"I know I did wrong but can't he hear me out...I was already on the verge of breaking it off with Kiki and when that was done no issue would have been on ground...maybe I should just leave and when I've officially broken up with her I come back to him."

At that moment, Owen came down wearing baggy sweatpants and shirts. His hair was packed in a bun. He looked pale. He was walking straight at him as Owens car was packed next to his. Jake got out of his and waited out for Owen to reach but he snubbed him totally.

Jake held onto his hand as he passed by.

"Let go" Owen demanded wriggling his hand.

"Please hear me out I beg of you"

"Let...go"

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier...we had nothing going

"Shut up Jake...stop lying. That time I traveled to New York didn't she come by your house ?...you even changed the lock to her birthday and you lied...told me crap ...Thats why you wanted us to be secret right ? ...so while you screw me over she'd be your perfect wife ...I don't even want to talk to you...just get the fuck out of my sight and leave me the fuck alone"

"It's not what you think...though it appears so...I'm"

"I don't care..." Owen said, turned and removed his hand. Owen's eyes were tinted red.

Owen entered his car and drove away and Jake drove off too. He drove to Jewels bar. He drank to stupor, drank till he could drink no more and fell asleep in his sit. Chico had to carry him to one of the guest rooms as he didn't know where Jake's house was and he couldn't possibly inquire from Jules on her wedding night.

*****

"What are we now" Trevor asked as his hand rolled on Josh's bare back as they cuddled.

"Fuck buddies"

"I don't like that...be my boyfriend "

"You clearly know I don't love you and I..."

"It's not clear Josh...if you didn't love me in the slightest we wouldn't be here...on this bed...together".

"Lust takes over me whenever I see you Trevor...understand that it's different from love"

"Should I give up then"

"How do you mean ?"

"Give up on chasing you...I don't enjoy playing around.I want a relationship with you"

"So we're playing around now"

"Yeah...cause it won't always be this way Josh...if you get your guy you'll push me away...how would I cope then..."

"I guess that's true...I wanna follow my heart...I'll tell him I like him"

"He has a boyfriend already...how can you do that...it will ruin the friendship you have with him"

"They are fuck buddies...just like us now...I'll show Monty that I'm the real deal"

"How can you be blind to the fact that the real deal is in front of you...we're "

"Goodnight Trevor" Josh said, stretched and turned off the lamp on his bedside table.

"I want you to be happy and you can be happy with me...after tonight I won't see you again...when you're ready and if I'm still single we will talk about us" Trevor whispered and kissed Josh's cheek then he got out of the bed and wore his clothes. Josh was pretending to sleep but lifted his head when the door was closed. He felt a bit sad about how everything turned out but Monneteni was all he wanted...

"I'll get to call him Monty one day...my handsome Monty"

*****

Jake woke up to a killer hangover, his heard was spitting internally. He checked his phone and it was 2pm in the afternoon, geez he had slept really long. He noticed he had gotten missed calls from Jules and Hamps too. He dialed Jules.

"You know you shouldn't worry a woman who just got married...I should focus on my husband but you're stressing me out" she queried.

"Hey..."

"What happened yesterday Jake...you just vanished and I wasn't able to get a hold of you till now"

"I'm fine"

"Did you just wake up...were you having fun while I was here worrying about you"

"No...I wish I was...how was your night"

"It was great...what happened "

"Are you in Paris now ?

"No...Our flight is in the evening...tell me Jake "

"He found out !"

"Huh...?"

"He found out about everything !"

"Oh...sorry...how did he ?"

"I don't know Jules...I'm a wreck right now "

"Shit...where were you last night?"

"At your bar...I'm still there though"

"Go home...no go to Josh's...promise me you'll go there "

"I don't want to...I'll just go home"

"No!! No Jake...you don't want me coming over and dragging you there myself now do you"

"Nothings gonna happen to me"

"No...he was different for you...I know how you mess yourself up when you broke up with guys you like and it's a guy you love we are talking about here"

"I'm..."

"Shut up and listen Jake...move into Josh's for a while "

"Ok..."

"Listen for once...oh ok" she said realizing he had agreed.

"Go there now...hang in there I'll be back in two weeks...sorry I can't be there with you now"

"It's fine Bae...have fun and say hi to Hamps for me"

"Hi Jake...be strong!" Hamps said as he had been listening in the phone call, equally worried for Jake.

"Hey..." Jake said

"Bye...take care of yourself " Jules said and cut the call.

'Hope I didn't just ruin my best friends honeymoon'

He got off the bed and barged out of the room. Chico wasn't at the counter, only Zoey and some cleaners were the one around. He got into his car and drove home. At home every corner smelt of Owen and he could clearly remember Owens smile when they were together and mostly when he made food for him and fed him to which Owen would reward him with a kiss.

"I miss you" Jake said as tears stood in his eyes threatening to spill. "I hurt you...I'm really sorry"

He took his phone and tried to dm Owen on Instagram but he had already been blocked and couldn't even search for Owens name. He called Amelia and she picked on the first ring.

"What is it"

"Is Owen around"

"I thought he'd made it clear that he doesn't want to see you...try and understand that and give him the distance he deserves"

"Tell him I'm really sorry for what I did

"Saying sorry can't suffice lying throughout the relationship...deceiving my brother"

"I didn't

"You ruined the image I had of you...all those time you came over you were lying to us...continuously doing so...I'll never forgive you...if you come to the house we'll sue you so stay away " Amelia yelled.

"I get..."

She cut the line and blocked him. The only thing he had now were the happy memories...but those memories had spices of lies in them. Lying is a virus...once it starts , it has to continue...has to flow with the order it originally started with...

Winter was gonna be really cold !! Jake hoped it would be cold enough to preserve their memories in Owens heart, hoped the feelings Owen was passing through now wouldn't burn their memories to ashes that would turn to snow flakes and wander away to the unknown...like they never existed...like they never loved.