Time for Independence

Cecilia knew that it was probably best to turn and leave, however, she was used to his beatings by now and decided to just get it over with. The other children were all at the neighbor's house. She slowly walked to the house and stopped a few meters from where Banda was sitting - watching her as she approached him.

"Wali pama!" he said in an angry drunk voice.

*The direct translation of "wali pama" is "you are determined" but in this case it means "you are foolishly brave" or "you are someone who does not know when to quit."

Cecilia was silently staring at the ground. This angered Banda even more so he lashed out at her, pulled her by her hair and proceeded to punch her. She turned her back to him in order to protect the baby from getting hit. He then pushed her to the ground and started kicking her as he shouted profane things at her. She still held her baby tight - trying her best to shield him.

Suddenly, he stopped. Cecilia looked up and saw that a few neighbors were holding him off. Her friend and another neighbor helped her up. Her friend carried her baby while they walked her slowly to the clinic nearby.

"That bitch is a whore," he shouted as Cecilia walked away - the neighbors still holding him. "I am leaving you for good this time. You and your bastard children will starve to death without me!" he continued shouting.

And sure enough, when Cecilia returned home later that night, she found that Banda had packed all his clothes and left. Cecilia cried. She did not know how she was going to take care of all her children. A few days later, her friend made a suggestion to her.

"Why not join me in the fish business?" She said. "The money is good even though you have to be away from home a lot."

Cecilia did not want to leave her children alone for several days at a time but she had no choice. She sent word to the village for one of her younger siblings to come over and help but none of them were willing. In fact, they were cross with her for leaving the village without informing them. She then turned to her eldest son, Banda Jr. who was about thirteen years old now, and taught him how to look after his siblings while she was gone. She then begun preparing for her journey.

Soon it was time to leave. She bid farewell to her children and left with her friend. They travelled for about five days by train to Luapula province where they would find the Luapula river which was used for fishing. When they got to the river, they had to wait for the fishermen to finish fishing and then set the price for their fish before they could buy any. Thereafter, the buyers (including Cecilia and her friend) sorted out the fish, selecting the fish they were buying. However, Cecilia and her friend preferred the dried fish to the fresh ones, hence they had to wait a little longer. This sometimes took several days but eventually, the job was done and they returned to Ndola.

Immediately they arrived, they went straight to the marketplace to sell off their fish. After they were done, they finally went home. This was Cecilia's new lifestyle. Even though she could not raise her children as she desired, it was necessary as it provided for all their needs. She then enrolled all her children in government school except for Banda Jr. who felt he was too old start school. However, whenever she was away, they did not go to school.

During the times she was in Luapula, Cecilia attracted a man - one of the fishermen who would always give her special treatment and a lot of extra fish. It had already been a few years since her husband left her and so she decided that she wanted to get married again. Their relationship lasted for a few months. Because of this, she was away from home for even longer periods of time.

Then one day she found out that she was pregnant. She was so excited for she thought that the pregnancy would get him to marry her faster. Unfortunately, it was quite the opposite. He told her that he was already married with children of his own and cut all ties with her. Cecilia was devasted; how could this keep happening to her? Nevertheless, she continued her business until the time came to deliver the baby. It was a boy and she named him Kelvin.

About a year later, Banda returned to Cecilia. He convinced her to take him back and they started living together again. They had two more daughters together after that whom they named Cynthia and Gwen; Gwen being the youngest child.