But I'm still cold, Hyung

I was in Seojun's arms, adding to his warmth from the cold and my hands were on Seojin's cheeks, also adding to his warmth from the cold.

As 'normal' as that seemed, I couldn't help but feel my heart race. Yeah, I might've been the abnormal one.

This couldn't go on. If someone were to walk in on us, they would definitely misunderstand. Plus, we were on the staircase. What if Sungho wants to come down and meet us here?

Or what if someone wants to come up and meet us like this?

It would only bring forth misunderstandings upon misunderstandings.

"Hyung, aren't you cold?" Seojin suddenly asked. "You've been up there for quite some time."

"I..."

I was going to make an excuse about not being cold on the inside, even if my skin felt icy when I felt a hand sliding into my top.

"My, Hyung, you're dressed so lightly. What would we do if you suddenly froze up?" It was Seojin.

I could feel his hand sliding against my skin. Why...why was he doing that? That wasn't normal.

"Don't worry. I'll definitely help you warm up. My hands are warm."

"And I'll hold Hyung closely to make sure he doesn't feel too cold. I have a lot of heat." Seojun added.

Wait, what was going on?

I wasn't even cold but they would assume so because my skin was cold but... Was this the way to go?

Seojin had his hand in my clothes and it was making me... Uncomfortable.

They... My eyes widened as I felt Seojin pinch my nipple.

"This place is hard and cold. Let me help you warm it up for you, Hyung." He said and I squinted my eyes, feeling him stroke my nipple.

This was too much. This stimulation.

This... Who taught them this? Did they know this sort of action could mislead the person, me, to be precise?

And I couldn't even ask because it would make them wonder about their actions, find out about it and their innocent minds would be ruined. I didn't want that.

Ugh, but it was pretty difficult to stay still, even if they were doing this without even knowing what their actions meant. They were so naive but I had to stop this.

"Well, I'm not cold anymore." I said and attempted to take my hands off Seojin's face but he held it in place and said,

"But I'm still cold, Hyung."

I felt conflicted. It was like he was begging me to give him my warmth but... If I stayed still, I would only risk getting hard in front of them.

"Well, all the more reason to get home, right?" I said and held his hand. "You two should head home so you don't get too cold. It's spring but the nights can be really harsh."

There was no response for a while as they both stayed silent. But then, they answered,

"Then, will Hyung come home with us?" Seojin asked and I gulped.

"What?"

"It looked like you were avoiding us, Hyung." Seojun said and I pursed my lips. Ah, busted. "We wanted to invite you a lot of times so we could eat together but... You always run away."

He looked like a dog with fallen ears, looking sad. Ah, what have I done?

I didn't mean to crush their hearts. I just wanted to stay away and avoid causing trouble for them now and in the future.

They would never understand my motive so it must hurt them to know I was avoiding them. What to do?

"Hyung, did we upset you by chance?" Seojin asked, also having the same sad expression on.

But... Why were they still glowing through their sadness? Ugh, handsome men were indeed built differently.

"Well..."

I looked away from both of them. How to explain the reason I was avoiding them?

No. Let's not explain. Maybe if I keep quiet about it and just apologize, they'll look past it. Hopefully, they'll leave me be, once they see that I won't be hanging around them like in the old days.

"You see..." My words hung on my throat when I felt Seojin slide his hand under my clothes again and found my nipples... Again. "What are you doing?"

"Oh, sorry, you can keep going, Hyung. I just needed to make sure this place was a little bit warm since we were going soon." He said in all innocence that I felt I was the one committing sin by allowing them to do as they pleased.

"Don't..."

"Hm, it's hard again." He said and my head exploded. Those terms... He could only say them with such a straight and innocent face because he didn't know what it meant, right?

"Hyung," Seojun called. "...if it's still cold, want me to use my mouth to warm it up?" He asked and once again, my head exploded.

What in the...? Where was this coming from?

"Since the mouth is the warmest place. I think that would work." Seojin said, agreeing with his brother. "How about it, Hyung?"

He smiled. He smiled so warmly and sweetly that I had to stop this.

"No, leave it." I said, took his hand out of my shirt, and smiled, awkwardly. "I already feel warm. Haha."

My smile felt crooked.

'What is this? These two have no idea what they're talking about. How can they so innocently want to suck on a man's chest? There's a limit to how much I can spoil them. Wait, have they done this with someone else before? Some other guy?'

I gulped, feeling my throat turn parched all of a sudden.

"You two..." I gulped once more. "...have you done this with someone before? I mean, try to warm another guy by..." The words were relatively hard to pass my throat.

I was probably scared that they would say yes to the answer I was about to ask.

"Oh, you mean warm another guy by sucking with our mouths?" Seojin asked outrightly.

"We've never, Hyung." Seojun answered. "And we've never even used our hands either. You're the only one who's come this close to us, Hyung."

So, I was the only one they've groped like this and yet they didn't know the meaning of their actions.

Yeah, they said Oblivion was bliss but in this case, Oblivion was a sin that was being done against me.

Hearing that, it was like relief coursed through my entire body. But at the same time, pain.

If it was indeed true, then that meant they weren't gay, right?

Gosh, what am I thinking? Do I wish a gay life for these innocent kids just to be condemned by society?

This night has gone long enough.

"Ah, look at the time. I think it's better to get going if we don't want to get back by midnight." I said and found my way down to my feet, rushing ahead of them. This was crazy. "Thank you for... Keeping me warm." I smiled nervously and hurried down the stairs.

Once again, I left them behind, not looking back at their faces or how my actions made them feel.

I just wish they keep forgiving and maybe give up someday.