Chapter 16: Interlude 1

"Here's your morning coffee, Absalom-sama. And might I add, your whiskers are particularly shiny this fine day." With his head bent down, Blue presented a tray with a pitcher of unsweetened coffee, and a couple pieces of unbuttered toast.

"Hah~ five AM in the morning already, huh Blue?" Rubbing his eyes, Absalom gripped the pitcher of coffee, and lapped up the coffee with his tongue.

"Man, why'd I ever agree to let Hogback stitch this lion mouth on, I'll never know. After the battle with Kaido, my face sure was a mess, but that's no excuse to get a lion mouth. I must've been drunk. It was the grief! Moria-sama insisted! I'm the victim here!" Absalom muttered to himself, trying to justify his life choices.

"Status report Blue, have the zombie work force cleared the western island of tree's yet? Moria-sama instructed that it be done before he gets back from Marineford, I want those zombies working around the clock."

"Yes Absalom-sama, the work goes well, all the tree's are chopped down, and the wood stored. All that's left is the task of digging up all the roots."

"Very good, Blue, I heard Moria-sama muttering about making a factory, or maybe a gun range for the zombies. In any case, Captain has some big plans for Thriller Bark. Continue with the report, what progress has been made on turning the cold storage area into a dungeon? I remember we already had a few dozen cells in the area, but the Captain wants that area expanded."

"Ehh, that is…" Blue danced around like he didn't want to be the one to give an answer.

"Out with it Blue!"

"You should really ask Red about this…okay fine, it's not going to well. Our zombie who's an expert in architecture said that we're going to have to build extra supports for the whole structure if we want to expand the dungeons." Closing his eyes in trepidation, a quiet smack knocked him onto the ground.

"You disappoint me. But more importantly, you disappoint Moria-sama, get it done Blue, I don't want to hear any excuses." Absalom narrowed his eyes, and sneered at Blue.

"Of, of course! With such an intimidating face, how could I not follow your commands oh terrible one!" Blue bowed to Absalom.

"Hm, see to it then. I'm going to give a call with our Den Den Mushi later this afternoon, make sure I'm not interrupted! It's with a very important client from Elbaf. Moria-sama might actually end your existence if this trade doesn't go through. So don't. Mess. This. Up. Okay? Good!" With a smile, Absalom continued on his walk now that business was concluded.

'Few, I have to get Red and Yellow's help on this! I wonder who that annoying lion mouth wants to call that's so important?' Blue thought to himself as he followed behind Absalom's back.

After berating Blue, Absalom thought back to Blue's excuses. He absentmindedly scratched his nose in thought. "I don't even get the sense smell a lion has. What can I do? Bite someone? Is all this lions' face worth is as a tool to scare people?" Carrying the coffee in hand, he nibbled at his toast while walking the corridors of Thriller Bark Castle for his morning routine.

"I think that the jaws of the lion are quite suitable for you Moria-sama! You'll always snatch victory away from the jaws of defeat! Why, Yellow was telling me a joke the other day about the cowardly lio-…haha, well it wasn't a very funny joke. Did I mention how handsome you are today Absalom-sama? Why, if we came across a maiden, she'd give her heart to you in an instant!" Blue laughed off his stumble, and switched topic like nothing had happened.

"A funny joke huh? Let's hear it then." Absalom swapped his attention away from his coffee and gave a Blue a piercing look.

"Ah hah hah, here's today's newspaper. It came in extra early since the Marine's are going to execute Firefist Ace tomorrow. Moria-sama is sure to put the fear of Kame into those Whitebeard Pirates! In fact, here's the chapel! We can pray for Moria's victory inside! Let's go Absalom-sama!" In a rush to avoid trouble, Blue ran ahead of Absalom into Thrillerbark's only chapel.

"Heh. That guy, always kissing ass. If only he could be more like Red." Walking into the chapel, Absalom adopted a solemn face, and approached a wall in the back. On the wall, there were row upon row of names. With another sigh, he lit a stick of incense, and began to pray on his knees for his fallen comrades.

"May you rest in peace Mikael."

"You always were a right bastard Garcia, but you were the best chef in all the Blue's."

"Maria, you'll always have a special place in my heart."

"Yamanaka twins, you guys sure knew how to party. No one could out drink you, haha."

For the next hour, Absalom bowed with his eyes closed, reciting their names from memory. Attempting to honor those he once called friend. He began to speak to them like they were there.

"Those days of looting, pillaging and spending big. We had fun together guys." Absalom broke out into a wide grin.

"For the longest time, Captain has been…unwell. But thing's are changing. He's got the spark again, and our Thriller Bark Pirate's are going to be reborn. I didn't think we'd move out of the Florian Triangle to be honest. I've grown accustomed to lazing about, and killing the weak pirates coming from the Blue's. I've grown old, haha." He laughed at his current sorry state.

"I wish Captain would give this life of piracy up, but I've followed him this long. I-I can follow him until we've defeated Kaido…then I'll rest easy knowing we've avenged you. Maybe I'll finally open that newspaper agency like I always wanted too. I could support Captain in other ways than just being an invisible killer. Haha, and Captain can use his zombies for information gathering." Absalom smiled softly.

"You'll think I'm crazy, taking on Kaido. He's even more powerful than when we fought him together. It's not going to be easy, that's for sure. And if we fail…well, save a spot for me. I'll see you all when it's my time."

"You really cared about them, didn't you?" Standing behind Absalom Charlotte Lola traced a finger across the name on the wall.

"L-Lola! When did you get here?! Blue, why didn't you do anything! You know that unless Moria-sama summons me, I'm to have no interruptions during my prayer!" Absalom's shock quickly turned to anger as his daily ritual was interrupted by an outsider.

"About that Absalom-sama, eh heh heh heh, she was, uhh, in here the entire time. Not that you didn't notice of course! Why, you're the most observant pirate to sail the-"

"Put a sock in it Blue, I don't want excuses. And you! What are you doing here Lola?! Come to spy on me!? Hm? What don't you understand that no means no!" Absalom crossed his arms in finality.

"But didn't you say just a few weeks ago that you'd marry the first girl you saw? That literally anything living would do since you hadn't been with a woman in more than a decade?" Blue questioned Absalom on his past statements.

"This and that are two different things! Besides! That goddess with the orange hair…Nami. Yes, her name was Nami! Now she was the woman of my dreams! And the first woman I'd seen! I don't have to explain myself to you!" Cheeks flushed in embarrassment, Absalom briefly lost himself to lust while thinking about Nami, and hugged himself tightly.

"Big melons, ha hah hah. Ahem!" A moment later, he turned his back to Blue, and redirected his attention to Lola.

With a giggle, Lola covered her mouth at the antics going on between Absalom and the little blue zombie.

"W-What?! It's only natural for a man to be attracted to a woman like that!" Caught in the act of his perversion, Absalom loudly shouted in his defense.

"There's plenty of big melons here if that's what you're after. Lola pushed herself forward, so Absalom could get a better look."

"Hahaha." Blue chuckled to the side.

A quick glare from Absalom saw Blue shut up with a squeak.

"Why are you here Lola." Absalom regained his solemnity from earlier, and glared at Lola.

Recognizing the shift in atmosphere, Lola dropped the act, and wore a sad smile.

"Is it really so strange that I came here to mourn my lost crew? You of all people should understand that." Staring deep into his eyes, Lola tried to convey as much emotion as she could.

After a minute had passed, Absalom finally replied. "Fine. Just don't make a mess while you're here. Come Blue. We're going." With a flourish of his tassels, Absalom left the chapel in a hurry, Blue in tow.

*Sigh* "What a sad man, I hope we can both find peace together someday." With a forlorn look, Lola sat down on one of the pews in the chapel, and reminisced about the good times.

Hogback awoke covered in a cold sweat. Ever since Moria had changed Cindry-chan to become his, perfect wife, he'd slept with her every free moment he had. During lunch, in the graveyard, during work, even in the shower. There was no taboo Hogback wouldn't break to be with his beloved. She was perfect.

"Maybe to perfect." With a glance at Cindry's serene face, he couldn't help but feel something was amiss. Where were the broken dishes? When could he eat food off the table again? Would Cindry ever kick him again with so much passion?

"Cindry-chan, do you think that you could go back to being a bit more…angry with me? It's no fun if you're always obeying me…" Hogback pushed his index fingers together in both embarrassment and anxiety.

"I couldn't possibly be angry with you Hogback-sama. You're the perfect master anyone could ask for!" With a cheery smile, Cindry went in to embrace Hogback with a deep hug.

"That's…Cindry, I order you to kick me!" Hogback commanded Cindry in order to get a reaction.

"Hee hee, you're so funny today my love. I would never hit my husband! Come, we haven't made love in Moria-sama's study yet!" Cindry grabbed Hogback's hand to drag him off.

"Well, I guess that's right, we haven't done it there yet, have we?" Rubbing his chin, Hogback reluctantly let himself get dragged off by Cindry.

"That's the spirit! Let's try to break the record!" Cindry beamed at Hogback.

"Fos Fos Fos Fos! You really know how to cheer me up Cindry-chan!" Hogback had a big grin on his face.

"Stupid, stupid Moria! Baka!" Perona was kicking the stuffing out of her toy animals, and any zombies that were too slow to dodge.

"You know, it's okay to care for Moria-sama. He is going to have that battle at Marineford today. Why didn't you just tell him that he's like a father to you." Perona's ever faithful and ever present servant Kumashi, the zombie bear, attempted to ease the tension in the room.

"Hmph! That's not it!" With her arms crossed, Perona began to pout.

"It's that stupid training regime of his! Perona how many ghosts can you make at once. Perona, what's the distance your ghosts can travel from your body? Perona, what's the radius of your explosions. Perona, can you fight while you control your ghosts. Every single day, it's Perona this, Perona that! I'm sick of all this training! And the worst part is, that I can't punish that little twerp Red, who's acting as my trainer, because it's that big goof's orders! Gah!" Perona tore at her hair in a brief fit of madness.

"You're a growing girl, and from what I can tell, Moria-sama plans to take the Thriller Bark Pirate's into the Blue's again. He's probably just concerned about your safety." Kumashi reasoned.

"You! Haven't I told you not to talk too much? Get over here!" Perona gave Kumashi the stink eye, and went to chase after him.

"Yeet! It's for your own good Perona!" Kumashi ran away with everything he had.

"You're going to eat those words Kumashi!" Perona paused for a moment, and dozens of ghosts went out to chase Kumashi. Perona leisurely walked after the fleeing Kumashi.

"You can run, but you can't hide Kumashi! Horo horo horo horo!" Several of her explosive ghosts made maneuvers next to Kumashi, and exploded just far away to get his fur singed.

"Yi!" Kumashi yelped in fright!

"Today's going to be a beautiful day!" Perona gleefully chased after Kumashi with a big grin on her face.

'Heh heh, works every time.' Kumashi internally smirked to himself as he took an explosion to the face.

*sip* "Looks like Perona's training is finally bearing fruits. Shall we continue our match, Yellow?" Taking a sip of tea, Red regarded the chess board in between him and Yellow.

"Mn! I hope Moria-sama does well tomorrow, otherwise, what would happen to us zombies?" Yellow worried.

"Me to buddy. Me too. Hey, loser has to clean up after Hogback." Red smiled.

"You're on!" With a smile of his own, Yellow focused back on the game, and let his worries for tomorrow disappear.

AN: My attempt at side character development. Sorry if it's too much feelings, not everything can be plots and murder, lol. More Moria next chapter. FYI when I say "Thriller Bark Castle" I'm referring to that big ass mast in the middle of the island. Also, does anyone have the links to One Piece Stampede? I'm asking for a friend. :^)