Lucy

It was already 10 pm when Lucy woke up. She pulls herself and sit with eyes still closed while his hands search for her eyeglasses. When her right hand reaches and touch the eyeglasses she immediately put it on and then that was the time she opened her eyes. She then stood up and pick the laptop beside her to put it on the table.

While picking the tissues on the floor Lucy feels her stomach rumbles. She never eaten all day, she remembers. After piing all the tissues and sweeping the floor, Lucy made her way to the kitchen. She hopes that no one will feel her presence on the kitchen.

She did not bother to turn on the light on the kitchen as she considers not a good idea to hide her sneaking to the kitchen. She opened the fridge and searches for food when the lights suddenly turn on.

"Honey" a female said.

Lucy slowly turns her head.

"Hi nay" Lucy replied to her mother.

"Are you hungry?" her mother asked.

"Hmmm… slightly?" Lucy reply with a slight smile.

"Slightly? You have not eaten all day and just sleep. Now you say, slightly?! Gosh!" her mother sarcastically retorted. "There is an Adobo in the table, heat it. The rice is in the rice cooker, eat that food first before diving yourself at the refrigerator" she added.

"Yes nay, thank you. Love you" Lucy sweetly reply.

"Okay, Love you too and good night. You think not turning the lights on saves you from my radar ha!" Her mom said before leaving.

Lucy did just what her mother told her and eats the delicious adobo her mom made. She roams her eyes on every side of the kitchen to distract herself from feeling he deafening silence.

Lucy refused to go back to her room after eating instead she goes to their living room and sits on the comfy sofa. She always thinks that they have the best sofa in the world.

She stands up and put her glass of apple juice in the table in front of her. She plugs their tele wire and picks up the remote control to turn it on. They have a Smart Tele.

Lucy goes back to the sofa and points the remote towards the tele to search for the Korean variety show "Running Man" she continuously loves for 9 years' now. She remembers that her father and brother called her crazy for laughing too hard in the past years when she was watching the show. It comes to the point that her father bands her to watch for almost a month. But Lucy never stops and secretly watches the shows in her friend's house whose also an avid fan.

Lucy needs to control her laugh while watching the show because if her father will wake up, he will definitely be angry. And who knows what will he do next.

Lucy finish watching two episodes of Running Man feeling tired and with her stomaching aching from laughing. The show never failed to make her laugh and happy. While standing up she stumbles and sit again. That is how her body reacts after laughing too hard. Then, she decided to go back to her room.

On her way to her room she run into her brother.

"Jun what is the time?" she asked to her brother only and younger sibling, Jun.

"It is 12:30 am ate" Jun answers.

"What? It is midnight already?! Hays!" Lucy shockingly said.

"Yeah, why? Oh, you sleep all day that is why…" Jun said teasing her ate.

"That is why what?!" Lucy with a puzzled face asked.

"None" Jun cold reply and continue to walk to the kitchen

"Weirdo." Lucy silently said while opening her door. She turns on the light and sit on the chair.

Every morning she will do her morning devotional, praying before reading the bible and write her reflection after. Since it was already morning she prayed and did her devotional. While praying a tear falls down from her left eye.

There is a belief that goes, when the tears come from the right eye it means happiness. So, that tears were called the tears of joy. When the tears were from the left eye, it means pain. But when the person feels frustration the tears will fall down both on his/her eyes.

But for Lucy it was the left. Pain. She burst into tears the next.

It took a while before Lucy composed herself to read the Bible. She wiped her tears in the towel and breathes for about hundred times. In her reading in the book of Psalm, she was on the chapter 139. When she reads the verse 14, where it sated "…you are fearfully and wonderfully made…" It made Lucy smile.

"Lord, you have been so great to me. This time and in the past I have belittled myself. Comparing myself to others. In this time Lord when I think that I am not good enough to someone and it pains me so much to think of about it, you are there to remind me that I am your creation." Lucy smiled with close eyes while saying her gratitude to the Lord.

Lucy writes a two pager reflection at that time. With reading the Words of God, she was uplifted physically and spiritually. "You never fail LORD" she said before ending her praying.

After doing her morning devotional she headed to the bathroom to washed her face. She never washed her face since she woke up. While looking on the mirror she saw how sullen her eyes.

"This is just now. You will never cry this much for a guy" she said to herself.

After doing her skincare, Lucy sleeps so that she can have an energy to face work later.

Lucy refused to open her phone and laptop that time. She lets herself free from the messages that can just add fuel to her pain. A pain that she will encounter later on.