I fell in love with my toaster

I fell in love with my toaster

I don't know why or how but whenever I look at it I feel a certain…something.

It's not quite the same feeling I have when I talk to my family nor is it like when I eat food. Some above that yet below.

Resting my chin on the counter, I gaze at my lover.

It has smooth steel skin with pockets meant for bread. A little handle to press down upon and a plug that extends far beyond its reach.

Its weird. My feelings are real, the faint heat that buzzes in my chest and the flush that appears on my face is definitely real. But..can a man love a toaster?

Is my love real or not? Fake or not fake?

If people can love dolls and digital people, then I should be able to love a toaster right? Is love based on functionality?

Your allowed to love dolls and anime because they are meant to be loved. But I can't love a toaster because its supposed to toast bread.

But my body definitely tells me yes. I can love it and it loves me. My mind states otherwise.

Is this the same carnal lust that drove humanity to procreate or is it a fond fascination that will disappear?

Either way I don't hate it. It's..it's nice. 

Getting from the stool, I go towards the fridge and take out some bread. Pre sliced of course. After getting two, I stuff it in the toaster and push the knob down.

Either way, I can't understand my feelings right now. So for now, let's just be friends, Mr. Toaster.

*************************************************

"How's the situation?"

"Good, good, Julieheart is satiated but it appears she has more demands coming."

"Any guesses?"

"Probably more children, maybe a cow?"

"Alright, I'll tell the suppliers to put in a new order."

In a metal compound of gray and white. Two officers can be seen chatting as they wait for their shifts to end. One held a clipboard as they went from room to room, keeping tabs on every cell.

Anguished screams can be faintly heard in the distance as the banging of walls and faint sobbing meld together into a simple melody.

A tune for the mind as time passes. After all, they had an eternity to spend here.

Here they spend their time. Waiting and waiting. A slip in focus, a wasted second is enough for the beasts contained here to break out. Of course, this is an exaggeration. After all, constant high tension is bad for the mind.

A slip will happen and a breakout will occur. That is inevitable.

"Please stop narrating the cameras, it's really creepy" muttered a man as he sat down, rudely interrupting my narration.

"What do you want, Ivan"

His face scrunched up in disgust as he replied "Ew, don't use my first name."

"I didn't sleep well today, Ivan", I replied as I slump onto the desk, trying to meld myself into the wood as I desperately wish I could sleep like a log. Even a dead one.

Man, I'm hungry 

"What time is it?" I perked my head up as I tried to remember when was lunch time. Around 12:30? Or was it 13:00?

Shaking his head, a sigh escaped his mouth as he looked at me in disappointment, "11:20, I didn't ask you for your condition. I just need you to do your job, go check the records for every day this past month . Somewhere around midnight to 4 in the morning."

Sitting up straight, I nod my head as I grab a pile of folders and start sifting through them. I'm a decent organizer, so it didn't take long for me to find the correct file. 

Spinning my chair around for a twirl, I turn to the computer and start typing in the password.

Midnight to 4 in the morning, so that's 00:00-4:00.

Sifting through the footage, I comb through the hours of 4 for anything unusual but I can't seem to find anything weird.

"Oh yeah, what am I looking for exactly?" I say as I spin my chair back to face my ugly friend.

Looking back, he looked serious as his eyes narrowed and his bushy gray beard seemed to grow darker.

"There is suspicion of a potential breakout. A hole filled with empty cans and shredded bedding was found in the cafeteria this morning."

Yikes

Looking through the footage, I can't find anything for  2 days. Then again I am skipping quite heavily to speed it up.

"Alright, show me where the hole was found and I'll try to find anything useful. It'll take some time though so give me a day. I'll also check last month to see if there was anything." I said suddenly.

 I'm lazy and I know it but I don't like unfinished work. I am what people call a reluctant leader. As in when everyone else is a piece of shit and won't do their work (I'm looking at you my group mates from highschool) I will try to get things done. Whether it is through calm words or verbal abuse is debatable though.

With a nod and an alright, Ivan gets up from the seat and points towards a small corner. Its near the drinks section and to be honest a

little hard to understand where they could have hid.

Was it like beneath the couch cushion? Or like in the walls. Eh I'll find out either way. I'm too antisocial to ask what it is like, so I'll just look for footage from this morning to see the holes appearance. Bad idea? Maybe.

"I'll get started then" a sigh escaped my lips as I think about the extra work I have now. My usual duties of watching the cameras has been interrupted with this suddenly important task.

At a minimum it should take around a day to review all the footage, though it might take more time depending on how thorough I want to be. Eh, I'll get like 2 pieces and I'll use that to as evidence fuck it. I don't get paid enough hush money to give a damn.

With a small wave, I let Ivan leave as I start once again looking through the footage.

Most of it contains late night staff working with one guard in particular sleeping on the job for 2 hours. Might have to report that as the food quality has dropped these days. Petty yes but when you stay here for a month, lunch is one of the few joys you get in this place.

Skipping forward every few minutes to quicken the review, I can't seem to find anything.

Resetting the footage back to around the 14th day of the month, I double check this time but instead using footage speed up instead of directly skipping. Finally I notice something wrong at 3:20. The footage darkens notably and it appears to pause for a moment before the footage skips to 3:23.  A 3 minute skip. 

Notting that down on a post-it note, I look for anything else of value. 3:20 has a 3 minute skip but looking at the before and after, there appears to be no change. My eyes zip across the screen as I try to find a difference.

For the before footage, it displays a guard who is currently sleeping on one of the cafeteria tables. A bowl of Mac and cheese is laid out in front of him while a glass of what I believe to be either coke or whiskey. I can't tell since since the footage is kindof blurry. 

Speeding up the footage further, I finally see in the vending machine there appears to be a entire row of drinks disappearing. Flipping back and forth, it's soda. 

Writing "fatass" on my post it note, I continue on to the next day. As I reach week 2 for this month, I hear a alarm from my phone as I drop everything I am doing and have a water break. Then I wait and start counting.

1 minute

2 minutes

3 minutes

4 minutes

And 5 minutes

5 minute and 1 seconds

5 minutes and 9 seconds

 I hear a low ring before I get up and exit my humid room. Take a deep breath, I sprint towards the cafeteria. LUNCH TIME BABY