Worries

I have never felt so much pleasure or desire when touching someone. I understand better why I feel so overwhelmed when I see him. And I always approach him closer instead of moving away from him.

That is typically what I usually do when someone is too close to me; I move away as far as possible. It even happens to me sometimes to feel the action without it being committed. Ethan often asked me, "are you a telepath or a crazy thing like that?"

Which never discouraged him from coming back again and again to the charge until I was able to let him gradually approach me. And now, he keeps trying to put his arm around my shoulders every chance he gets.

Although I dominate him with a good head, he's ridiculous sometimes when he tries to tiptoe up or find something to climb on to gain some height. He doesn't bother me at all. I can tolerate him pretty well.

I just figured it out.

I don't know why but it's like that; maybe it's because he's not hostile, and he's always honest with me, in addition to his pretty body that makes you dream. Don't get me wrong; he does not attract me. He is pretty, that's all.

I need to calm down, and that little boss down there isn't about to leave me alone soon. I didn't want him to go, but I had no choice. I was rude in asking him to leave as if he had the plague, but it was the only way.

The pain I felt in the pit of my stomach reading the confusion spreading all over his face before he ran away, was unbearable. Why exactly was that, and why did It hurt me so much? I wanted to stop him, but it would have been worse.

I shuffled my feet back to the couch, where I sat, taking my head in my hands for a while, going through the scene repeatedly. How did I end up kissing him? How did he end up in my arms? How?

I don't understand what just happened, and It wasn't me kissing that fairy boy so greedily and passionately. It's like a dream.

When I just wanted to tell him that I wish we could be friends. I don't know when things go wrong. I usually control everything. I don't do anything unpredictable; everything with me is controlled and calculated. But what just happened escaped my will completely.

This beautiful little angel face will drive me out of my usual way. I know it. I can feel it right down to my insides. Once the excitement that made my blood boil has dissipated and my penis has recovered, I lie on my back with the only companion I have left, this last image of him.

It won't get out of my head. His expression haunted me, he was lost and clearly in pain, and it bothered me. Why am I worried?

For me, sex has always been sex with as little touching as possible, which means no cuddling, no kissing, no caressing, and even less attention. We perform the act in a position that increasingly avoids all other types of contact. oh, actually, it's not like I wanted it to happen; I was forced to do it.

It's just that… ok, let me tell you. It's not like I will keep it to myself indefinitely; I must say it to someone once.

My first sexual relationship was rough. It was with one of the teaching assistants when I was in a boarding school for high-IQ kids. I was barely eleven on the very day of my eleventh birthday.

I had no other friends; all I did was work over and over again with teachers and therapists and help to adjust the program for other residents to make it more suitable. We all do it to distribute each child category better.

While I was working on a project, she offered to stay to watch over me while I finished. I didn't see the time pass. I never watch the time as long as I'm absorbed.

She approached me, trying at first to be intimidating and arrogant, which didn't appeal to me. She leaned over to pull the chair I was sitting in towards her. She was in her late thirties.

"You know today is your birthday, Aim," she said in a soft voice that disgusted me. She saw my disgust towards her and the way I backed off; she hastened to tell me:

"Please don't panic; what I'm going to do is an experience to help you open up to people. You help to prepare a more specific program for the others, but for you, we still can't find how to get you out of your shell."

I stayed there, listening to her, prostrate in my chair with fear running in my stomach. "What will follow; We will put it in the context of your training here," she finished in a breath, starting by unhooking the stops of her dress. To find herself naked in front of me with only black lace panties for clothing.

I smelled soap in the air; she must have slipped away to go bathing; I was not paying attention to her. She started to take off my uniform pants.

Kneeling in front of me, she took off my underpants which freed my penis. She let out a cry like a gazelle in heat before giving me a bright look of excitement.

I was so damn scared seeing all that excitement on her face. This look of hers scared the hell out of me.

"It'll be fine," she said. "I'm going to take care of you, and from today you'll be happy to celebrate your birthday. I'm going to leave you some good memories."

She grabbed my arm with force, pulled me from the chair to rock me on the table, and hurried to get on me astride. After many attempts, desperate to not be able to make me obey to give her cunnilingus, she fell back on my penis with rage and ferocity.

She began to rub against my penis, which became increasingly hard like wood to show its entire length, seventeen centimeters and fifteen in circumference. And I was just a child at the time...

Satisfied with her work, she sat there, uttering another cry of pleasure that sounded like hell when I found myself buried deep inside her; she swallowed my whole dick in one go without forcing.

She started to move slowly, then faster, with a lot more screaming of all kinds and swearing that can make you nauseous and sick. That was the state in which I found myself. After an excellent three to four minutes, her body went into convulsions and let a river gush out of her, which soaked the shirt I was still wearing.

When she noticed that my erection was not affected by her performance, she had a devilish smile before starting, again and again, more than three times in a row, with the same result, which became an absolute deluge as she persisted.

In her trance, she slapped me twice. I had my right cheek on fire with her five fingers embedded in the delicate flesh of my face. She finished very late and escorted me back to my room.

On the way, while she was leading me to my room, she began to apologize:

"I am sorry, Aim. I promise I won't be so greedy next time, but it's also your fault, my bunny; you're beaten like a horse. You're a real thoroughbred. And for the marks I left on your cheek, you must forgive me. I lost control."

"I know you don't talk much, but I want to ask you to keep this between us. And you won't have to take your pills if you do this for me. Can you promise me that?"

Hearing her words, I gave her a look that she took for a yes or something because I was not too fond of those pills they forced us to take as supplements.

I protested against these stamps that we did not know the name of. It was the only time I spoke. Since that day, she has done everything to find herself alone with me, and every day without exception, she demands more and more. Her sexual appetite is inexhaustible.

And I wouldn't say I like anything remotely related to the hospital, and pills are my worst enemies.

After a few months of frustration and insomnia, I was always afraid to see the next day; I took matters into my own hands completely. I understood her need, and I had what she wanted, and there was another kid before me since she ran into my little boss downstairs; she didn't want to look elsewhere.

So, I started ordering her to wait for me in positions for hours while I worked or asking her to do many things that had nothing to do with me. She became my slave afterward.

I know all the holes in her body; she was the one who led the way while she begged me to finish her torments, to release her every time I left her panting with desire. Without ever daring to touch me, I couldn't stand her.

Once she cursed me, I punished her.

She gave herself wild pleasure in front of me by repeating that she was sorry and would never dare speak to me in that tone or say high-sounding words. She squirmed, screamed, and grabbed my foot while I straightened my belt. Without a word, I get her out of my way and walk away.

This situation lasted until I was thirteen, and no one noticed there was something strange about her.

And what just happened to me today has nothing to do with sex or the thing that she showed me. Today I wanted to touch him. I wanted to feel his skin under mine, I wanted him in every way possible, and he had to leave before I did anything unforgivable.

I want him, I'm pretty sure of that, but gently. I want to know every bit of his pretty little body on the fingers of my hand with my eyes closed. I want to savor him like good wine.

I've been desperately waiting for him for more than three days. What worries me the most is my fear of not seeing him again. Will I be able to see him? Will he talk to me again? "Ken, I need to see you, " I uttered with a sigh.

I have to find my friends. I don't need to run away from them anymore. They noticed I've been distant; whenever I say, "hey guys, I'm coming back; I have to check something," they let me go without complaining or trying to follow or hold me back.

They understand me more and more, and strangely, I am beginning to understand them better.

People focus too much on the results, sometimes pushing them to make many more mistakes instead of overcoming obstacles. I have to say that I appreciate them; being in their company gives me a new feeling. I'm not that different after all.

Sometimes you have to know how to take a step back and let things happen at an average pace to see where it will lead you. I forget my differences with these four, and my difficulties become more accessible and easier to discern.

If I don't understand a situation, they try to explain it differently with scientific theory if need be.

With them, I'm not a little genius or any other appellation that can be given to me. They know I'm a bit difficult but don't make a big fuss about it.

As Nodge was for my father, I also found my catalyst. Except there are four of them.

I have to join my friends now. I spent time on the roof waiting for Kenan to come back so we could talk about what happened, but he never came, and I needed to explain myself or at least apologize. I don't want to throw everything at him without holding back, either. It will be too weird and stupid.

"Wow, look, our little Martian is back!" Shouted that jerk at the top of his lung, Jade, who was always attracting attention, which prompted others to turn to us. And that's when I saw him.

"Oh, He's back!!!"