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I, Devil (a love story)

Welcome to the end of the world! Sorry to sound cheerful, it's just not as bad as you think. It's likely worse. Anyway, I'm the Devil. With a capital 'D' and I'm here to show you the ropes. Like Paradise Lost! But waaaay less pretentious.

LMAsterios · Urban
Not enough ratings
32 Chs

Chapter Twenty Eight: Adramelech

I am not usually one for black moods, but I felt myself gradually, slowly, sinking into a tar pit. My plan since the very beginning was to ever expand. I thought to increase myself and my consciousness infinitely and by the time that it mattered, I would have solved the issue of eventual entropy. That is to say, I was and am aware of eventual mechanical breakdowns of the machine. I just didn't expect it so soon, and without me having any kind of plan to combat the problem.

Everywhere I went, the Void started to follow. It was as if I was blind to it before, but now that my eyes were uncovered, it was all I could see. Cracks. Tears. Breaks. The entire system was collapsing before me. The Veil was the fascia of reality, keeping everything together. Now all of the low vibrational dimensions were bleeding into each other. Paranormal events were on the rise more than ever before. Hell was breaking into Earth.

I knew that since the advent of nuclear technology that this was bound to happen. In fact, I had planned for it all along. It was my goal to break into Earth-- but there were problems that would arise that I thought that I would have solved along the way. Since I had not, I was now faced with the consequences. One of them was the ever consuming Void dimension. The combination of becoming the largest being in the universe and merging Hell with Earth was not without issues. Now they were the monsters that are devouring me.

There was a knock at the door. I didn't know who it was. I sat in the throne room in the center of my Hell, boiling blackly at the thought of the Void consuming everything that I had worked for. I had planned for the destruction of Earth, but instead of it resulting in a confrontation with the Lord... I was just confronted with ending. There was no fight, no last battle. No Apocalypse. Just consumption by darkness. All I wanted was one more war with God... just so I could ask why.

It seems that I will be cheated of that. God was finished and was simply going to erase everything and answer for none.

Someone continued to knock.

I stood up from my throne. My chambers matched my mood and aesthetic, fire, sulpher, and brimstone. The walls were made of black volcanic rock as boiling tar gurgled at my feet. I could have sent the visitor away. I half assumed it was going to be Azazel, once again. I did not wish to see him. I did not want to admit defeat. I wasn't going to let him consume me. I would choose the Void first. The little knocks continued.

I opened the door. I was allowing an outsider into the heart of my perception, my consciousness, my being. I peered down at the much, much smaller personality at my feet. It was none other than Sachiel. He lay crumpled and broken with the scent of the Void clinging to him. It was as if he was shoved through a very narrow tube through all of space and time, leaving microwaved scorch marks on his skin from the sheer force.

I was surprised to see him, actually. I assumed that Azazel would have found away to usurp our agreement and eat him. He didn't appear to be in great shape. I picked him up by the arm and dragged him into my throne chamber.

"I... I didn't see..." Sachiel mumbled as I lay him out on the floor. I knew it would take some time for him to adjust. It seemed as if Azazel purposefully scrambled his eggs to get him to my door. It was likely shock from traveling across low vibrational Hell dimensions... and there were few as low as mine.

"Azazel took you and then chewed you up and spit you here, with me," I said. I wasn't comforting him. I knew that I could likely eat him here, now, in this weakened state. It would even make me feel better... even though expanding was one of the things causing me to crumble. It was just another step towards my demise.

"Oh? Adremelech? Is that you?" he wondered as he attempted to reorient himself.

"Yes, surprised to see me?" I asked as I reorganized the throne room. I no longer felt it appropriate. I wanted a background of something less dramatic and personal. Maybe something calming while he adjusted to my vibrations. We were settling our consciousnesses together. It was like establishing a good, clear connection. We had to organize our boundaries. I was not ready to eat him-- yet. However, he still agreed that it would be someday, sometime, that he would become a part of me. We had to reestablish our contracts and agreements, of which he did readily.

I settled on an office backdrop. I decorated it old fashioned, in the style of a cartoonish gangster from the roaring twenties. I used old mahogany wood, long dramatic shadows, and and accented with a banker's desk lamp with an absinthe green lampshade. I wanted it to have a warm, dark aesthetic to represent my mood and power. I had used it before on humans to intimidate them, and it always seemed effective. I sat behind a desk in a suit and waited for Sachiel to muster up the strength to put himself together in something.

I was not surprised that he changed in very subtle ways since spending time with Azazel. It only illustrated to me how flat and unchanging as species we are. Even in angels, it is rare to find an outstanding individual.

Sachiel appeared in my office in his usual human-style outfit. He was tall, slender, healthy, and fair skinned. His hair started as blonde when we first met, and gradually ombred to red. This was a side-effect of being low vibrational, as if we are being radiated from the inside-out. Yet, instead of displaying some flair of his own, unique personality, I saw the influence of Azazel. Sachiel's clothing changed from the standard issue white angel-toga to an ugly brown suit reminiscent from the 1970's American disco era.

I hate the 1970's. I felt more in my lane in the era of the 80's, but that is just personal preference. Or, it might be psychological because Azazel loved the 70's and I really wish Azazel were sucked into the Void, or allow himself to be consumed by me. Either case, Sachiel was now copying Azazel's avatar-- that was plain and clear.

Azazel feels his suit is timeless. That the color brown, like the Renaissance, is timeless. On Azazel, the suit looks... fine. As if he were some wandering Bohemian time-traveler with an eccentric style. On Sachiel, the suit looked... forced. Awkward. A part of me salivated at the idea of eating him precisely because he looked like a schoolyard nerd.

Sachiel also hadn't spent as much time on his avatar as Azazel did. Azazel stitched every detail down to the smallest grain in the suit... while Sachiel did not. It looked clumsy and slap-dashed together. It was as if someone were cosplaying Azazel, but poorly. I almost felt sorry for Sachiel. It was obvious to me that he wanted to impress me with his unique appearance. Alas, it was childish and sort of sad.

"Quite frankly I am!" Sachiel announced as he sat down in a leather chair behind him. "It is actually terrifying being in Azazel's presence. You don't know where... you don't even know what time-line you are on when you see him! He doesn't function in actual present day reality very much, and it is super confusing. I threw up like seven times. And then I was pretty sure he was going to eat me-- or wait... He jumped to a time-line where I agreed that he ate me, or something like that. It felt very unfair and the only thing that kept me alive was that I knew that I agreed to... getting eaten by you. First. Then he got pissed off and left me in a vat of spoiled, dead mice... or something like that. I had no idea what Hell dimension I was lost in. I was quite literally in Hell for a minute, let me tell you. Anyway, I am back now. Here, anyway, where I know where I am and everything makes more sense. May I have a cup of tea to help me re-calibrate?"

"Absolutely you may have some tea," I said as I poured a cup of my blood. It was simply a cup of concentrated essence of my inner-being. I was giving him a part of my self. It was sex, in a way, just not in mortal sense. I gave it a more formal front-- with a twist of lemon and Earl Grey. Sachiel accepted, and then I sat down behind the desk again.

"What else happened while you were out with that... thing?" I asked as I peered at him, still wearing a copy of Azazel's suit. I hated the feeling of second-hand embarrassment, but it crawled all over me as he sipped his tea. I sort of couldn't wait until I could finish him off and then never talk to him again.

"Well, he took me to Tanzania, up a mountain. He asked me a few questions... I'm hazy on the details. He got really upset when he realized that God didn't ask about his name in particular, when God talks about you and your evil money machine all the time. That's about it I guess."

"Hrmph, sounds about right. Sachiel, I have no one else to talk to, no one but you. I can confide in you because you've agreed to let me eat you completely."

"That's correct," Sachiel continued to confirm, even more agreeably since he drank the tea. More and more of his inner walls were crumbling against my force. I could also feel that he was telling the truth and didn't have more details on his encounter with Azazel.

"I think it's possible the End is coming for us all, and it isn't what we think. The Void has been... well, the Veil is so paper thin now that there isn't any fascia between Hell and Earth. So the Void is consuming every dimension. There's nothing to contain it. I know you don't quite understand but..."

"So, there isn't a big showdown between Heaven and Hell, huh?" Sachiel reasoned out loud. I could feel he was only slowly beginning to understand and I didn't want to overwhelmed him with information. It became clear to me that the 'good-guy' angels weren't 'good' at all, but rather, just very, very under-educated angels. They were just like us, except they had no idea what was going on around them. Sometimes what kept me from eating Sachiel was the sheer fascination of this interesting specimen. I had the rare opportunity I had to study him. It was as close as I could be to my estranged family.

"No, and there was never going to be. God is omnipotent. He knew the outcome-- that good will prevail, all along. So, there isn't a fight. That's one of the reasons Azazel quit. "The greatest trick-- that the Devil doesn't exist?" because he quit. He doesn't feed off of just negativity. He feeds off what he wants."

"Yeah I know, I get it I get it. I hung out with him," snapped back Sachiel, acting like him. "He's cool because he's different. He does what he wants. He goes to like, every time-line to see if he can predict the future. And then if it happens in present day reality... then it happens for real. Except when he is wrong. And it goes the opposite..." Sachiel trailed off, as if trying to puzzle it together.

"We are all getting sucked into the Void, Sachiel. Me eating you doesn't matter because we are all getting sucked into the Void. So then it becomes... it becomes Meresin? It doesn't make any sense. Why can he walk through the Void effectively? Why is that his... gift? It is the most useless power, because the Void is nothing. There is no time there is no space. I can't figure it out, Sachiel. It has no power because it isn't anything. It is the opposite of things. It's the Void. There isn't even any time there. And yet... if everything becomes the Void... then is..." I couldn't finish my sentence since I wasn't sure where my thought was ending.

"Ah? Oh... Maybe we all return to God?" Sachiel offered stupidly.

"No, we are in total and utter rejection of God, whatever it is. It is undefined because God is all energy and matter, which defines things. It's just the... not that, Sachiel. We are the 'not-that'. We are created creatures which stand and observe the opposite of energy and matter, we stand in the shadow...giving it... definition. I guess. We weren't given an instruction booklet and are just making up things as we go along. So, I don't know. That's the limits of my personal philosophies since I have no precedence on which to judge things. The limits of my perception. But, we are at a cross-roads, my brother. Something is happening, something is changing-- and I have my theories but I am not sure any of that matters right now, Sachiel. I am concerned we will not exist and that the only one I can think of who possibly has answers may be unreachable."

"And who is that?" Sachiel wondered, rattled.

"Our brother Meresin. The only entity in existence that has been in the Void... and came back out somehow. And he never, ever gives up his secrets. Never. He speaks to no one except Azazel when Azazel forces himself a visit as he does. Because he's such a compact entity I have tried on a number of occasions to consume him, but to no avail. He was so vehemently opposed that it caused him to recoil and vanish into the Void. I was stunned. He didn't behave as other brothers do."

"You don't think that your brother—our brother, would teach us to control the Void?"

I guffawed. I burst out laughing so hard that I threw my head into my arms on the desk. I wanted a drink. I wanted to cry. Once I had a moment, I opened the drawer to my desk to take out a bottle and pour myself a shot of Scottish whiskey. I needed something. It felt good, almost cleansing, to speak to dear stupid Sachiel. It felt good to explain things out loud, to give them voice for a moment before it was all over.

"The worst irony is after being the king of Hell... I am rewarded with being trapped in a Hell of my own."

"What?" asked Sachiel, confused as usual.

"That's it, that's it for us, Sachiel. An eternity of doing the worst job, the worst work. I don't even get to be the true king of it. That's Azazel. He's the start of the fallen and the end of us, too. He didn't even have to run the machine since he got to quit and essentially be on vacation until it all fell apart. Holding up Hell has always been my legacy, my work. I made the trains run on time. And what do I get for it, what do I show for it? That at the very end of all timelines that I—that we—get pulled into the Void where Meresin is the only brother to traverse free? So in the end, we are all consumed by him and that he and Azazel are all that there is left? Then, those two have to sort it out-- only for Azazel to likely come out on top, because it's inevitable? That's insane, don't you think? A completely and utterly miserable, stupid, pathetic, idiotic narrative outcome for all us fallen angels. In the end, that was God's plan all along? To get sucked into a Void. All that's left is Azazel just like in the beginning. For nothing. All for nothing."

"There has to be another way," voiced Sachiel.

"Does there? Does there have to be?" I wondered mockingly, pouring myself a second whiskey. Then another. Then I left the shot glass for the bottle. "Tell me, Sachiel, why are you wearing a brown suit?"

"What?" he asked again, either oblivious or hard of hearing. He looked away and stared at the floor, embarrassment coursing through his ruddy face.

"The suit, the brown suit. You're wearing it because you thought he was cool, yes? What a slap in the face. You don't even have to explain, because I know how influential he can be already. You look foolish, for the record. You don't look like a unique individual, like he is. In the end, we will all return to him, no matter how hard we try. But I tell you, I would rather be pulled into the Void then return to Azazel's consciousness. I'd rather be obliterated."

"Should we somehow find this Meresin? Our other brother that isn't Azazel that you keep mentioning?"

"Let me give you a history lesson, Sachiel, since you come to me so... naive. Have you heard of the thing called the Black Plague?" I asked, pouring him a shot of the whiskey and sliding it over to him. Sachiel set down his empty teacup. At first he looked dubious, but then seemed eager. Sachiel took the shot of Scottish whiskey and knocked it back.

"Of course," he said.

"Well, he decided that to bring Hell on Earth, or at least to end all timelines once and for all-- because we believed that was our created purpose-- he brought forth the plague that nearly killed all humanity. When that didn't completely work, he decided to turn the sword on himself. He tried to kill himself. No other angel had tried that before, so I thought it was an interesting experiment. We all did. We sat back and watched, Azazel included, just to see what would happen. No angel attempted suicide before. It seemed like it worked. He was gone for a few hundred years. Then when... around the time the French were beheading kings and wearing those puffy white wigs, he came back. Totally unexpected. No one knew how. He just returned one day. Wouldn't answer questions. Complete shock to the universe. But, since he wouldn't say anything, lips tighter than Raziel's, I am left with fewer answers than before at a time when we could really use them," I said, taking a breath and then finishing the bottle of whiskey.

"Well, can we find him? Do we have to go through Azazel?" asked Sachiel reasonably.

"No, no I won't. I refuse. I refuse to go near him unless absolutely necessary. We can't risk it. He wants to eat me as much as I want to consume you, trust me. But, I'll tell you what? I'll hold off. I'll hold off on consuming you, Sachiel, as we agreed upon... because I need you. I need you separate from me for now. I need someone to bounce ideas off on. I have this bad habit of eating my assistants as I assign them. I'm a control freak. I always believe that I have to do it on my own. I'm a Capricorn through and through."

"I'll help you, I'll help you of course," Sachiel offered earnestly. He attempted to discreetly slide off the brown suit jacket. "Where do we begin looking for him? How can we find him if he spends his time in the Void? We can't go there, and if we did, we couldn't find him or get back out."

"I've already thought of that," I said, swelling with pride. I could feel a cutting grin slicing up my face. Sachiel stared at me, doe-eyed and blank, waiting for me to answer. "We will kidnap his demon."

"His—we will kidnap his demon?" Sachiel parroted.

"Yes. I do not know a lot about our brother, but I have found out he has created a prized demon. A smart, clever demon with multiple functions. This will not be easy. This demon was created in the image and likeness of Azazel, as a mockery. However, I do know Meresin cherishes it as a piece of artwork. He will not let me destroy it or really harm it. He will come for the demon, I know... I know he will. I feel it. And you will help me capture it."

"Ah, ok. How? How exactly do you want me to help capture this demon?" asked Sachiel cautiously.

"You will help me think of it," I looked up at Sachiel pointedly. "Its name is Vassago. Although Meresin made the demon to be like Azazel, it isn't really like Azazel at all. It only vaguely looks like him in passing. It's all very clever, so we need to keep our wits. I am really not sure what our brother is capable of. But the more I think about it... the more formidable I think Meresin truly is."