I'm made of rubber and I want to be the pirate king, but will I?

Yo, the name's Luffy, and this is how I become pirate king, or do I? So when I was a kid, I went to a pub, there I met a dude named Shanks he's the leader of the red haired pirates, he told me that I couldn't be a pirate because I was five or something, I begged him to let me join but being the asshole he is, he told me that I needed to prove my loyalty or I couldn't join. So I tried to cut my eye, luckily my aim was garbage so I missed it and cut myself under the eye. Then Shanks told me that I'm lazy, and that to be a pirate I need to work hard, he also called me a fat ass, so I stole his fruit and I ate it. Apparently that fruit was a Devil Fruit or some shit like that, then Shanks smacked me up. During that some hunter or fisherman or some dude like that walked in the pub, he was bad mouthing Shanks, so I tried to beat him. Then I got kidnapped, then I got thrown in the sea, luckily Shanks saved me, but my G lost his arm while trying to save me. Then I stole his hat