I'd Like to Change My Reincarnation Subscription, Please

Superpowers abound. Villains rule the world. A transmigrated dork that has absolutely no idea what’s going on. Strong-armed by the Superhero Enhancement System into the thankless job of endlessly performing good deeds in a world where such actions are often met with violence, Lucas Lynn doesn't have much choice in regards to using his supposed gifts. It’s bad enough having to pretend to be a supervillain, but how exactly does Boss System expect him to save the world with only the help of a homeless orphan, a dog that’s smarter than he is, and a yoyo? Oh, just trick some supervillains into becoming superheroes instead? You make it sound so easy! ----- Tags: Sci-Fi, Isekai, System, Dark Comedy, Satire, Superpowers, Anti-Hero, Time Looping, Gore, Slice of Life, Rubber Ducky (yes, Mr. Quacks deserves his own tag) ----- Do a google search for "Geminel WordPress" for a page that has a little about me, information about the novel's inspiration, a link to the discord server, a link to the character reference sheet, a char art gallery, and a collection of short stories, both within and independent of this novel's universe. ----- Excerpt from the end of Ch1: [Bzzt... Scan complete. Analyzing...] 'Eh?' [Analysis complete. Positive value found, now loading... Loading complete.] 'Okay, WTF is...' [Binding successful. Congratulations upstanding citizen. You have been selected by the Superhero Enhancement System. Please select your desired enhancement. The following options are avail...] 'I'M DYING! IS NOT DYING AN OPTION!?' [Error, invalid selection. An enhancement will be randomly selected. Randomizing... Strength has been selected. Enhanced strength will be calibrated for your rebirth. Please look forward to it.] 'WHAT IN THE ACTUAL F-' With this final thought, Lucas dies in a pool of his own blood on the sidewalk.