Chapter 55: Imprisoned in a Tower
Days passed by as uneventfully as the falling leaves of autumn. She spent her time in solitude like the classical princess trapped in the dragon's tower. It was torturously quiet and the isolation was asphyxiating. Time seemed to have stood still in her large empty room while the outside world continued with its life without her. The only view she had of the outside world was her narrow window sealed by iron bars. The only people she's spoken to so far are her maids who would bring her meals and prepare her baths. Her only measures to pass the time and not lose her mind are reading books and singing songs Marcel had written for her. She can only reminisce by her window her happy times with her beloved while whispering promises she didn't get to keep.
Today, however, was a bit different.
"Ruby?" she said in astonishment due to the girl's unexpected visit. Tiredness was clearly visible on her face and she lost her brilliant glow and energy. She was paler than before, and she seemed thinner. Carmilla was worried that she hadn't been eating right or sleeping peacefully and yet she herself was no better.
"I brought you dinner and your wedding gown so you could see if it fits." Ruby declared as she held a silver tray filled with a delicious meal specially made for Carmilla.
"Thank you." she meekly answered as she welcomed her to her room. Maids followed after holding a large box in hand and placing it on her bed before leaving. It was probably the gown she was talking about.
An uncomfortable silence followed as they sat opposite each other on the round table. Ruby placed the tray in front of Carmilla and settled in her seat, her face betraying no emotion. Carmilla was unaccustomed to her sudden cold attitude but didn't say anything. She was still afraid and guilty of facing the pain caused by her betrayal.
Carmilla didn't touch the food yet due to the awkward feeling in the pit of her stomach. The atmosphere became heavy and suffocating so she decided to break the ice.
"Ruby... I'm really sorry for all that I've done. I don't deserve your kindness, and I don't deserve you. I wish I could say sorry enough to make it all better but I couldn't. Nothing I can do will set things right between us. Please forgive me. I should have exerted more effort to make us work but... I know you felt it too. That we are drifting away. I'm not blaming you or anything but I betrayed you enough now I want to be completely honest with you. I don't love you anymore. At least not like I used to. I'm sorry." she paused not looking at her, too afraid of what reaction she might see from her eyes. Ruby didn't say a word. She only stayed still and looked at the roses in a distant vase.
"I know what we had was amazing and true but now it has completely faded. I love Marcel now and I don't know what to do. I don't know how to feel. I don't know what to say to you. No amount of apology can make things right but I still want to tell you that I'm sorry. I'm sorry for keeping this from you and I'm sorry for betraying you."
"What did you really do except for fall in love? We cannot control who our heart will desire and I completely get how you feel even though I still love you but I--I bear plenty of bad news. I hope you prepare your heart to take this all in." Carmilla noticed the pain that flicked from her eyes but didn't dare address it so she only nodded for her to proceed and sat still waiting for what she had in store.
"They are moving the date of our marriage into next month to ensure that no further hitches could go on." Ruby informed her with a blank unreadable face. Carmilla became shocked by this and figured that it was due to her prior confrontation with her father.
"I will be returning home for a while to clarify things with my mother. I will be departing tomorrow and will return in a week's time." Carmilla noticed Ruby fiddling with her fingers indicating that something is bugging her mind.
"What is it?" she questioned wearily.
"Your father had forced the opera shut, had Marcel beaten, and he will soon be exiled into the monster realms." Ruby confessed with a disappointed look.
"NO NO NO! That can't be! He can't do that!! When?!"
"Tomorrow." Carmilla's world stopped due to the information and her blood ran cold with despondency.
"Marcel had also left this on your window sill in your original room." Ruby pushed an open letter towards her and she quickly took it with lightning speed in desperation.
"Those flowers in your vase had been from him. He would leave roses on your window every night and I collected them all and ordered the maid to put it in your room. Also, I've read it. He confessed his deepest secrets and entrusted you with his identity. Marcel is a vampire. Which I should have guessed from the beginning."
"When did he put it there?"
"Perhaps in the early morning and being a blood demon explains all of his enigmatic ways of slipping past our guards. I must be leaving now. Will you be okay?" Carmilla read the letter expectantly however the words on the parchment made her heart break. He's leaving by the next dawn and bidding her goodbye forever.
"No." Carmilla answered with a blank look while holding the parchment close to her heart and replaying the words again and again inside her head. She wiped away the tears forming on her eyes and mustered a pained bitter smile on her lips.
"I'm sorry. Thank you very much for giving this to me. I really appreciate it. You should go. I don't want to keep you here any longer."
"Okay." Ruby nodded but she was still very worried about her friend's mental state. She's been in so much pain for all this time and knowing that her lover is abandoning her she must be very devastated. Ruby feared that she might do something reckless however she cannot linger any longer due to her schedule.
The two of them stood up and Ruby unexpectedly encased her in a tight hug. Carmilla was astounded at first but she quickly composed herself and wrapped her arms around her back before letting out all her pain and grief as she cried on her best friend's shoulder. Every bottled-up emotion, every silent scream she wasn't able to release poured out as Ruby allowed her to free herself.
"I hope you get better once I return." Ruby said as she finally detached herself from Carmilla who had a lighter look about herself.
"Yes. I'll try. Be careful on your way there and don't rescue any more princes." Carmilla joked laughing weakly.
"I won't." Ruby kisses her forehead before heading out of her room.
When the door clicked into place the smile faded from Carmilla's lips as she made sure to lock it. She went to the box lying on her bed and opened the top revealing an extravagant white gown with angel quartzes and the most expensive layers of gossamer fabric tailored by the best hands in the empire especially crafted to fit her body perfectly.
She dressed herself in the beautiful gown and searched desperately for something in her sliding boxes. She pulled her drawers and threw them violently when she didn't find what she was looking for, scattering debris and unwanted objects on the floor. After the third drawer, she finally found it.
Carmilla placed the letter opener against her arm and started digging it against her wrist. The blade was quite dull so it took her a bit of pressure to tear through her flesh and draw blood, however, a shallow wound is not what she was aiming for. She needs to dig deeper. She cut through her wrist in a vertical line and pressed harder drawing out more blood. The pain was excruciating, her sight was starting to blur while black dots started invading her vision but she kept going.
Blood covered her white dress turning her skirt crimson. She trembled as she felt the blood gushing from her wound and she cried both in pain and in grief of her fate. She dug deeper and finally popped her artery. Her eyes blinked in exhaustion, her mind is barely clinging to consciousness and darkness seemed to be more comforting than life. She called his name yet her gentle voice only reached the ears of the wind and the cold stones of the walls that all seemed so gloom due to the macabre sight they had to witness. Her lips whispered their last regret as her eyes completely closed from life. She finally passed away with grief and despondency as her only companions.